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scared and broken hearted
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scared and broken hearted

Hi everyone, i haven't posted for a very long time. Just when i thought we were going to be ok every thing spun out of control. My son who's 20 years old is a heroin addict, in the pursuit of his drug he burglarized a home, he was sent to jail given a chance to rehab but left the rehab and was sent back to jail, a minimum security county jail to serve his sentence, yesterday he had court on a new charge and the judge gave him the maximum, state prison time. I feel like i'm losing my mind, i dont know how to handle this or what to do next. He's 20 yrs old, he's my baby, i can't cope with the fear i'm feeling. I'm so lost, the probation officer had recommended the minimum and she told us to appeal. It's a mountain to climb and i dont know if i can do this.
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495284_tn?1333897642
I am so sorry you are going thru this.  Our children will always be our babies no matter what age they are.  How much time did he get?  I hope he will get some intensive therapy during this time.  Drugs take us to the darkest alleys in hell. He has to pay the price for the crimes he committed, sad but true.  Take this time now to take care of you.  Have you thought about Alanon or a seeing a therapist?  As a mother we take on alot of guilt and hurt.
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1809070_tn?1402577679
Sarah,

Thank you, i had to take a couple of days to take everything in. He got a year. We've been fighting so hard for the last two years to save him from himself, every moment has been about Eric, every day i wake up worried, i dont sleep through the night, i look "old" now. I'm just so sad. My older sons need me to stop now, Johnny says the world didnt stop turning because Eric became an addict, but for me it did. I'm going to try to see a therapist or alanon, i'm so exhausted from this battle, and i know it will be waiting for us as a family when he gets home. God help us, we love him so much, it's broken his little brothers and dads heart, it still doesn't seem real. Prison, i can't understand how this could of happened to our family, to my son. Why?? I wish i could go to sleep and wake up and this all have been a very bad dream.

Alexandria
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2083449_tn?1381358308
Hi Alexandria! My heart goes out to you, and all the moms who are going through this! I completely agree that you need to take care of you! Personal therapy or Alanon is a great idea! I know at Alanon there is great support and you can talk to and get support from people who are or have been in your same situation! My roommate is in the exact same position as her son was recently arrested to selling Meth! Remember one thing, that addiction knows no boundrys! It happens to rich people, poor people, celebrities, and even Presidents wives! Remember Betty Ford? You simply can not try to figure out why! A year really isn't that long of a time and hopefully your son will do some deep soul searching! Take care of yourself and focus on and get support through the strength of your family! I'm sending prayers and strength to you! Take care, and post anytime you need some support!  Hugs!
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Avatar_m_tn
Just wanted to give you some big (((HUGS))).  I had to watch my son go to prison for 13 months in 1999.  He was 20 years old.  I literally cannot even remember a lot of that year.  Hang in there, sweetie.  It is so hard when our children become old enough that they make the wrong decisions and nothing we can do about it.  I used to (and still do) look at families that seem like they have no problems and I feel like I am standing on the outside looking in the windows of their cozy lives and I couldnt and still cant understand why our lives have had to always be in turmoil.  One thing I have come to know, is that life is not fair.  (((HUGS)))
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