Late night approaches.... ugh

[lady_m]

I look forward to the day, or shall I say night, when I can once again sleep like I used to.  I used to look forward to hitting the pillow after a long day, now I just feel like a kid who panics as bedtime gets near.  

I just keep telling myself that every night I spend tossing and turning and staring at the ceiling, is one night closer to being through this hell.

I am glad I have made it through this week.  I won't forget everything I've dealt with - good and bad - because that will keep me from using.  I am thankful for the things I've learned and realized, but I also never want to go through the physical and mental hell again.  Ever.  No matter how long it takes to get through it I'll keep fighting if it means never facing it again.

[lady_m]

Thanks - and you are totally right.  I am closer than yesterday and that's what's important.  I can't imagine what 50 days clean will feel like, but I can't wait to find out.  You'll REALLY never be able to shut me up then... LOL

I took some Ativan so hopefully that will help me relax and get some sleep.  I don't take it regularly but I figure Monday mornings are hard enough so I need all the help I can get :)

[tzt2lady]

You will get there and you are closer today than you were yesterday.   Just keep going one day at a time, one hour at a time, one minute at a time and soon you will be writing posts like Shelby who has close to 50 days opiate free.  I know that eventually the cravings are gone.  Oh, the thoughts are there once in awhile but eventually those thoughts will no longer have the power to obtain "craving" status.
I hope you get some sleep tonight.
tzt