Stupid Things Youve Done in the kitchen??

[troubleinohio]

OK Fess up- whats some of the dumbest mistakes you've made when cooking? It can be recent or from 50 years ago, Im just curious (and bored tonight lol)

something just happened to me tonight for starters:

made a great beef stew w/dumplings tonight but Can you believe i burnt the heck out of my EYEBALL doing it though??? LOL i went to add the dumplings and the hot boiling broth splashed out and right into my eye!!!!!! i ran to the sink which was thankfully about 6 inches away and flushed cold water on my head forever lol. My vision was blurry for an hour or so but it feels much better now. Scared me for awhile though, i thought i burnt my cornea bad and was gonna be blind or something, lol.  

also when i was a little kid - probably about 11 or so, i decided to bake cookies on my own. I accidentally used SALT instead of sugar AND instead of vanilla, used VINEGAR, lmao. and to top if off, i burnt the helll out of them too LOL! ANd the story gets worse- my dad (who wasnt a mean drunk yet back then for the most part- didnt want to hurt my feelings and he ATE THOSE THINGS and said he liked them LOLOL)

ok I'll just start with those two for now and wait to see if anyone adds some stories of their own next...surely someone out there's done something stupid in the kitchen, right???

[HelpinUtah]

In August I was making my sister-in-laws favorite cake for her birthday.  It is a sponge cake made in a spring form pan.  I doubled the recipe so it would be larger than I did it last year, but for some reason didn't adjust the temperature or the time!  DUH!!!  Anyway, I had it sitting on the rack to cool down.  Whenever I used a spring form pan, after it sits for a few I'll undo the latch so it will cool better.  Well, I undid the latch and the contents of the pan leaked all over the counter!  I was so upset!  I did not have the ingredients or time needed to make another one.  So, I ended up buying her a Chocolate Birthday cake from Cold Stone.  LOL!!!

[PromisedLand]

I can't think of any real kitchen horror stories, though I do most of the cooking around here.  My daughter loves my chili so I made a big old pot and instead of adding cumin, I added cinnamon..

another time, I poured myself a big old bowl of chili, topped it with some freshly chopped onions, tobasco and jalapenos...and the promptly dumped milk in it.


Jim

[kim715]

Magi...LMAO.......It sounds like you and I together could be dangerous.....LOL   But oh the memories of the nasty little things we've done to get even.I know I've done some mean things in the past,but I still laugh about them when I think of it....My husband doesn't get the humor in them though....wonder why that is....LOL

[flmagi]

This isn't really a kitchen story...it comes under things I've done to boyfriend/husband.
X-boyfriend had gone out drinking, not telling me, couldn't get a hold of him. He came home very late and totally smashed. The next morning while I was getting ready for work, I filled 2 pictures of water and ice and set them on the counter to chill. Right before I left for work, I went into the bedroom where he was out like a light and dumped them over him.  Ever see anyone levitate really fast? I just walked out and went to work laughing my a$$ off.

[NautyOne]

Oh, and I did cook the turkey with the bag inside.......twice !!!  .......burnt microwave popcorn so badly it looked like a piece of tar in the bag.....had to throw the microwave away.  The house smelled for two months...it was bad.....

I am still trying to figure this one out?....I forgot a baked potato so long once when I opened it.......It was completely hollow????  where did the potato go....lol.  I serious?

And, of course the infamous burning the eyelashes off.........I think thats it....

[NautyOne]

Dang it , kimba !!..........I thought i was bad.  Those are the things I think, but could never do.......ballz..^ 5^^^^^^^^^ sista.

Vic.......Don't feel bad ...I just did that recently.  I ran out of laundry soap and had to wash my bedding....my fluffy blankets and whhoo hoo sheets.  I was so mad ...i said f-it and poured in a ...I guess to large amount of one of my favorite body washes, and need I say more.....it looked like a scene from ' I love Lucy" but not funny.......:-/  Thing is ..I really do know better....oiy!

Magi.......wow!  i guess we see who the real meanies are here......lol.

[122 Tactical Fighter Group]

A friend of mine married a Vietnamese lady that made her first casserole with those wrapped sandwich cheese slices - - she left the plastic wrap on when she baked it - - that casserole would stick with you - - -

[dominosarah]

sometimes just showing up in my kitchen is stupid!!!!

[kim715]

LOL  Vic....such is life right?? Live and learn.Look at the bright side...I bet your kitchen floor was really clean after the dishwasher 'incident.'.....Kim

[VicUser]

When I moved out from home my new apartment had a dishwasher, now never having a dishwasher before I didn't there was a difference between dish soap and dishwasher soap. So, when I finally had enough dishes to do a load I filled the little cup thingy with dish soap and went to the living room to watch TV while it did all the work. About 20 min later I looked and there was suds coming out of the kitchen! I spent the rest of the evening getting rid of the suds and mopping the floor. My wife, who was my girlfriend at the time, came over while I ws cleaning up and laughed at me. She still reminds me of this frequently, lol.

[kim715]

Magi...the mixing tip is a good one,thanks for sharing it.LOL My husband complains when I don't mix the spaghetti and the sauce together in the big pot before I serve it.I don't really like sauce and he likes a ton of it.To me it makes more sense to serve your own preferred amount on top of your pasta,to him ,lets face it,it's just too much effort.The next time I will use your tip,and serve his portion up on the kitchen floor.My dog will be thrilled,she LOVES pasta!!!!! LOL  Magi,that was a good one!!!!   Peace...Kim

ps.....I'm sorry about the bird...

[troubleinohio]

omg i am just totally LMAO at these responses~!!!!!!!!! way better than i ever imagined they could be!!! sticking your boob in a fan?????????? Burning down the kitchen, throwing plates of food on the floor, and KIM you evil witch- I LOVE YOU, LMAO!!! these are priceless!!!!!!!

[flmagi]

I have tons of kitchen screw ups, cut fingers, burned food, etc.  Lets see....
Tefloned my parakeet to death:   I was boiling eggs in a Teflon pot and forgot about it. The water boiled away, and the fumes of the teflon burning killed the poor bird.
My husband and I decided to order Chinese food one night. So I set the food out and he gets all pissed because they didn't mix the pork fried rice with his shrimp dish. I told him to mix it himself, he got more pissy, like he couldn't eat it unless someone else mixed it for him (such a baby). So I got up and took his rice plate and shrimp dish and dumped it on the floor, and said "There, now it's mixed, Enjoy!".......The dogs were very happy that night.

[kim715]

Ok...I have one,but it was intentional,not an 'accident'.My husband is a recovering alcoholic,4 years sober now.Anyway back when he was drinking,needless to say,we didn't get along so well.So he made me really angry one day,lots of days like that,can't remember now just what he did.A friend of mine had come over and I was beating her ears about it and got the idea of wanting to 'get even' with him.So she suggested that we bake him some chocolate chip cookies,but aside form all the regular ingredients,to add some ex-lax to the mix.The bars of chocolate ex-lax,so the cookies wouldn't come out looking weird or anything.So we did.I left them out on the counter,and he came home and ate about 3 of them.Was on the commode all day the next day.He blamed it on his drinking and so did I...I have told him about it since.He wasn't amused.LOL

I also have a laundry story.He made me angry another time and I had this mentholated muscle rub stick,just a cheap brand from the dollar store,and I took a couple pair of his underwear and rubbed the stick all over them and then threw them in the dryer.It was summer time,and he was a painter back then,so he used to really sweat in certain areas,if you know what I mean.The first time he wore a pair he came home from work walking like he had a potato chip stuck in his behind and he didn't want to crush it.I know it's mean...but I'm laughing like crazy right now remembering it.He asked me if I had changed laundry detergent.LMFAO I laundered the other pairs I did it too before he wore them.DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME!!!!!!!!!!! LOL

[NautyOne]

veyda.......Yes, the garbage disposal.....you like want touch it when its running..lol. Omg.....and always when I am near a fan......I have that same desire to guess what....Not stick my boobie in it......lmao!!!

Dang,  now i don't feel like such a freak.......lol.  Someone understands.......:-))

Nauty........

[dominosarah]

okay i am scared now!!!

[NautyOne]

Every time I use my braun hand mixer and plug it in, for some strange and bizarre reason I have to touch my fingers on the blades.  Only when its plugged in, I also have to do the same thing with my coffee grinder.....Its like I have this fascination with ?......when i see the blades spinning I have a desire to touch them.  Now I would never do it ......anyway, I almost stabbed my self in the stomach once....we called it the watermelon incident.  I am very careless with knives, and splash water everywhere....even into electrical sockets and plug and unplug with wet hands and sockets....... it makes people cringe....hehe

Never once have I NOT burned the garlic bread.  Not Once!

Vedya......Omg, girl......you torched a kitchen with a tortilla.....?  dang it!

Nauty.....

[Lady_Baglady]

I was in a huge hurry one day, I was cooking for quite a few of my boyfriends and mines friends. I was making steak and mashed potatoes. The way I like my mashed potatoes, I add a spoon full of sour cream and some milk and some shredded cheese and mix that together. Like I said, huge hurry, people were going to be there any minute. Needless to say, without looking, I reached in the fridge for the sour cream. I felt around and grabbed what looked and felt like the sour cream. It was cream cheese. So I glop it out in to the potatoes and mix it up and serve dinner, and well, it wasn't a bad taste...just different....

Another time I was making spinach quiche. I completely forgot the eggs (I have no idea how since that's the most important ingredient, sometimes I get hurried and don't pay attention to the recipe = /)...lol...it was spinach mush/soup/gruel, we didn't eat that.