I just cannot get a break ever it seems like anymore I will say that I have been doing good staying clean but that’s about all that has been good just figured I would stop in and give everyone an update about how I have been doing and as far as the oxy problem I have been doing great no problems in a LONG TIME but as most of you know I am only 25 years old and had back surgery a little over a year ago and it was not a success but everyone said I just needed a lot of physical therapy so I did all of that and have been thru some SERIOUS pain from that but nothing seemed to get better so last week I went to my surgeon for a check up to see what was going on and I was told the very last thing in the world that I wanted to hear and that is I am going to have to have another surgery and this one is going to be twice as bad as the last which was two fusions and two screws on my l5 vert and this time he said I am going to have to have at least 4 fusions and two rods and at this point of my life I just don’t know what to do or what to think I have never been as miserable as I have for the last year and a half of my life I have not been able to work and can no longer do the work that I love to do and am very good at so needless to say I stay depressed pretty much all of the time and now the one good thing I have going for me is all going to go down the drain with the surgery because I know I am going to have to have pain meds again after I go thru another horrible surgery and I just don’t understand what I ever did to deserve this I mean I am only 25 years old and my life is being ripped apart more and more every day that passes well I will stop rambling on about my problems I just guess I needed to vent a little because I know I will get good advice and kind words of support that always make me feel a little better because it always seems to help me when someone I have never met in my life takes time to read what I wrote and are willing to try and help me but like I said I will stop rambling and I’m sorry for this long post and sorry for the bad spelling and all that to I just didn’t feel like putting in comas and periods and all of that right now haha :)
well I know it’s been a while since I have posted anything and I know this is prob not what everyone that has been posting to me since the start of all this wants to read but it is what it is and I just feel like nothing good ever happens to me anymore and I just would love to know what I did to deserve this hell I have and am still being put thru each and every day
p.s. - sorry for all the crying in this long post and sorry for the bad grammar again
Nice to see you posting. Wish you had better news.....Have you done any research, if possible on this surgery? hopefully it will help and the pain will be gone. When are you having this? Having all that pain can really wear us down so lets hope for a good outcome. Will you be staying with anyone afterwards? Will there be anyone to hold the pills for you? Keep us posted okay?? sara
Sorry to hear about the pain and surgeries. It's good to see you posting though. Sometimes we just have go through what we have to go through. We don't have to do it alone. Don't underestimate how important that is. I have back trouble and will most likely have a fusion done sometime this year. My neighbor already holds on to muscle relaxers for me. I hardly need them but when I do I get the third degree. sometimes I feel like I made a mistake giving them to her but that is just the addict in me talking. I guess I still have some screwy thinking. LOL!!!
Anyway, we are here for you. Do what ya gotta do, stay clean and ask for help. God Bless!!
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