Just seeing if anyone on here watches Intervention or Relapse. Relapse is a new show on A&E now about addicts/alcoholics that have relapsed over and over despite several attempts in treatment facilities, AA, etc. The shows are actually pretty good I think, it's always sad seeing this from the perspective of all the family members and how they're affected. Especially when they've been dealing with it for years or even decades and had their hopes up and then consistently watch the person they love relapse over and over. Sometimes I think about my mother and what it would be like if I was my own child and how hard it would be to watch my child self destruct and go through all this pain and be completely helpless to it. I don't know what i'd do. Anyways that was a little off track but watch the shows if you get a chance and tell me what you think!
I watched Relapse last night, I also watched intervention. I find that these shows are really good. It is amazing how hopeless and scared these addicts are. It gives me a little glimpse of what I looked like when I thought no one knew about my addiction. I find myself tearing up and wishing the best for these people. It is really crazy how I can relate to these people no matter what drug they are on. Recovery is a long hard road but so worth it in the end. It is amazing how much better these people look like after a few weeks of recovery and wonder if people see the change in me. It is a great show for the family of addicts cause maybe they won't feel like they are the only ones going through all this.
Yeah I watched last nights relapse about Brandon and Tessa I liked it because it actually showed how hard this process is. Also the sober coach in last nights episode is by far my favorite haha I love him
regarding how addiction affects the family of the addict...
i cannot even begin to express what a loved one's addiction does to a family...it has the potential to destroy the family unit.
as parents, it is horrible to watch your child slowly killing themselves with drugs - knowing that we are helpless. we are supposed to protect our children - be able to protect them from all things evil in their lives. this might be the one thing that we have no control over...and it's heartbreaking. it's gutwrenching to watch your child walk out that door, not knowing if it will be the last time you see him/her alive...sitting there night after night waiting for that phone to ring.
the stress that one's addiction places on the parents, many times is the direct cause of divorce between his/her parents...and if not divorce...many years of marriage counseling / therapy.
siblings of the addict have a hard time also. there becomes this wedge between a once loving relationship and feelings turn into jealousy, embarrassment, and pure hatred. once addiction becomes the forefront in a family...the parents tend to overlook the other children and focus all their time and attention to the addict...always trying to "save them"...money spent on rehab, attorneys, etc. siblings, who were once used to living a certain way, now find themselves not getting the things they need, due to the fact that the money is no longer there. they are embarrassed that peers are constantly reminding them and asking them about their brother/sister's actions...heard they were arrested, in jail, gone to rehab again.
WE are the one's who face the brunt of your addiction. we tend to hide in our houses, fearing to be seen in public, knowing that everyone knows about YOU. we are embarrassed to go to work, to church, and pull away from even our friends in order to not have to face the shame of your actions.
while we go through this day after day - you the addict dont give a damn about anything but your drug of choice. our tears mean nothing...our fears mean nothing...the amount of money we spend means nothing. all you care about is where your next hit is coming from.
if and when you get clean, you then have the nerve to demand that we trust you now. you, the person who took the most from us without any regard to our feelings. you stole our money, our time, our friends, our jobs, our relationships...YOU STOLE OUR LIVES ! ! !
if you are an adult addict with children...you can just about bet that your children will become addicts also. you are teaching your chldren, DAILY, to run from life. your children, no matter how young, KNOW that you are no longer the mom/dad that you used to be. they wonder if it's them that is making you do drugs. they see the difference in how you treat and interact with their other parent. they listen to the abusive words, see the abusive actions, and feel the tension between you and your spouse. all these actions are how they perceive that life is like...and they tend to grow up and treat their spouse in the same manner. children tend to model themselves after their parents, no matter how bad it is...it's what they learned from you ! ! !
i am the mother of three addicts. i cannot tell you the pain that i have endured and lived with for more than 15 years. i didnt ask for this and i'm MAD AS HELL that this is what my life became.
how dare you, the addict, put your selfishness off on others. how dare you destroy our lives. how dare you turn your backs on the ppl that love you the most, all for the love of your next hit.
you might not have asked to become an addict...but you can sure as hell can do something about it. grow up...stop running...stop destroying ppl's lives and do something about your addiction before you loose everything. if you would spend the same amount of time working on your recovery as you do on your addiction...you might just make it.
LIZZY LOU- Hope you feel better after your little rant but I'm not certain that any forum members here need a lecture. Are you getting any help for your anger issues? You know addiction isn't a choice right??? It has very little to do to do with maturity or selflessness;it doesn't descriminate.
I'm surprised you don't know this given the fact that all your children are addicts,or three of them. I hope they're doing well...
this was no rant...just the facts regarding how addiction affects the family.
no where in my comment did i say that addiction was a choice. the choice comes at doing something about it...whatever it takes.
being a part of this forum for over 4 years now...i have posted something of this nature several times. it's always amazing to me to read the comments, negative and positive...usually shows me where a person's head is in their own addiction...whether clean or not.
i'm not here to argue and i'm sorry that you "perceived" my post as a rant...and it definitely was not a lecture. just stating how addiction affects the ppl who love you the most. sometimes it kind of hard for an addict to face responsibility for what they've done to their family.
take it as you may...i speak nothing but the truth.
That's fine. I know how addiction affects a family as do many on the forum. We're all very sorry,of course. Making GOOD choices is not a quality that most addicts posess. That's the thing...it's horribly sad for everyone.
It's only my opinion, but it really sounds like a lecture to me. Maybe that's okay though; we could all use a reminder of the devastation we created. Was that your point?
Anyway, how did you like Albuquerque and Santa Fe?
I dont think lizzie is lecturing at all she has been the parent she has delt with the pain .Addiction or chioce isnt the point the point is it has major effects on everyone in the family When I was in active addiction I didnt care what effect it had on anyone all I cared about is me .She is just trying to show others threw the eyes of an addict loved one.
When I think of what my addiction has put my mom through all these years, it breaks my heart. Im sorry that you went through it THREE times with your boys. They are lucky to have a mother that has gone to such extremes to understand their illness.
The worst for me was many years back when I first got into drugs, I became friends with a guy who robbed my families home, I still cannot forgive myself for that. They tell me I have to let it go, but it hard because in spite of all that, they still are the ones who pick me up and save me when I need it.
Anyway, I know this post was originally about INTERVENTION, but I just wanted to say that.
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