afraid to begin self detox

[chila]

Im a mother of 4 and hvae been taking narcotic for over 5 yrs ranging from codeine to now oxycontin 40mg...i hav been dignosed with fribomyalgia, chronic back pain..... I wnt to stop taking all narcotic,
but i am afraid to begin.  I am also taking effexor 150mg, attivan 1mg 3xday as needed, zanaglex 4mg as needed and lidoderm patches.  I ran out of my meds early (as usual) and went to the er...I was told that they could only give me  an rx for one pill until i found a doctor..Have an appointment with pain mgt doctor for xray guided injections,.........I knwo he will not give me any narcotics since I've seen him before, but I do see a rheum dr once a month...rx  180 xycodene 15mg 1to 2 every 4 to 6 hrs.....bottom line I am taking too much and want to quit so badly but i do not have the courage to start...I would like to talk to my rhem dr  and ask him if he would help me taper off...but im afraid of being judged and "labled"as an addict which I now I am......there I said it...so  is there any hope for me...and my children...10yrs, 9yrs, 7yrs, and 3yrs...I hve a loving husband who would support me in everything but I feel I let all my family down....I am thingking about having him keep the medicine and just give me my daily dose.  I also need to stop getting medicine online,it is very easy to do and I cannot believe I let myself go this far...Am I hopeless?


any help and suggestions would begreatly appreciated, specially on how to deal with the w/d symptoms.   thank you and ahve a blessed day!

[chila]

wento to the endodontist for my root canals and also hping he would give me something untio I saw my rehm doctor on wednesday, he did but i already took all sixteen of the lortab 5 mg/500 .  i will talk to my rhem dr and see if he will help with tapeiring off the oxys...wlll keep yuou posted and i am also scheduled for back injections on the 15th so well see how those work.   as always keep praying for me...

God Bless

chila

[TimH2]

Welcome to the board. I would make a new post and you will get much feedback. A lot of people are working right now and will answer you later. I wish you the best and we are here to support you.

Tim

[amie52]

I have been on morphine and oxy for 4 years, and just oxy for 2 years before that. I wanted to quit. I went to a doc who is able to perscribe suboxone. I went into withdrawal and took my first pill. within 30 minutes, all wd symptoms gone. I felt great. Woke up this morning, however, and have rls, sweats and shakey. Has anyone ever had this with suboxen??? From what I can tell, it's a great med, but I'm a little frightened because this is supposed to be NO W/D's.
Help??? Amy

[TimH2]

You are not a bad mother!!! Please don't think negatively about yourself, try to think positive thoughts. I hope all goes well at the pain clinic. I quit for 2 weeks and then hurt my shoulder. I had to take something for it because it was really hurting. I am quitting as soon as the pain in tolerable. When you quit it will take some time to get back to your old self. You can do it and I would recomment therapy or NA/AA. I also know that churches have group support. Best of luck dear and keep on posting. I will say a prayer for you and hope your pain subsides.

God Bless,
Tim

[chila]

going to see pain doc today---in about an hour.......i am on my last oxycontin 40mg..am i a bad mother and wife for hoping that he gives me something to see me thru to my next appt with rhem doc on the 15th....

Just want my life back with out taking pills.......Help  depression is setting in even thouugh I take effexxor 150mg a day, plus attivan for anxiety attacks 3x day as needed, but ive taken more than that just to get me through:(    
will post later and let you know how it went.

[TimH2]

I saw the doc and he is going to do some awful test on my right leg. I was in an accident too. He is going to electrify me and I have not read about it yet. I don't like the sound of it, lol. I will read about it tomorrow or the next day :)

[chila]

I forgot to mention that  I was involved in a car accident about 3 yrs ago (not my fault) have witness!

which my doctor said had aggravated my fibro and chronic back pain.  I been seeing other doctors and numerous trips to the er, plus physical therapay, massage  therapy. back injections and so forth.  well, its time to settle and the lady from allstate is "willing to setltle for 3500" how generous, considering that this is an ongoing conditions that was aggravated by the acc.  I told her I had to get babysitters for appmts plus co payments, medicines and so forth so she went up to "4500".  what do you think?  I'm not out to make big bucks but I dont think that this covers all the medical treatments and everything related to it.  I am not asking for a million bucks but 4500?  

[chila]

Iwould like to start tapering off asap, but I only have 5 oxycontin 40mg each, plus to make thinngs worst I saw my podiatrist and had to have injections on both heels since I have spurs(sp)? and fasciata(sp)?  so right now my heels are throbing  and am following the directions....ice it for about an hour a few times a day and stay off my feet.  He doesn't know about my meds, did not want to give any narcs since he gave some about 3 weeks ago (20 Hydros 5mg)  he said that with the injections i will feel better and said "LETS STAY AWAY FROM NARCOTICS".  If he only knew!

I see pain mgmt tomorrow for an eval/ f/u, last time I was there was about 18 months.  Deep down I'm hoping I get something until I can get my refill from my rhem dr.  I just saw him on july 18 and am already out of the oxycodone 15 mg.   do you think it would be a good idea to call and make an early appmt with him and discuss tapering off  plan with him? However, the writing is on the wall (actually on paper), he send me a letter stating that he did not know whether I was abusing or not and didnt want to jump to conclusions; however, if I called to make an earlier appmt before i am due, or called to get a refill on hydro, then I would be asked to leave the practice.  When I spoke to him in person, he was very nice and understanding and told me that he was being honest with me and wanted to help me,  hoping that the back injections would help me take lower doses of pain medicine and that it was a moot point to discuss the situation any further, we would start from there.
So there it is....any suggestions?  by the way, I have not lookd up the taperng schedule yet, I might do it tomorrow.  God bless

P.S.  I told my husband that I had joined a support community board for pain meds, I did not tell him it was for addicts, I am not ready to tell him, even though he understands about your body building up tolerance to the meds to where you need to take more and more!  So maybe he does know.

[TimH2]

I posted the taper plan under the thread "Ultram" that Vanessa posted. Print it out and start your taper tomorrow.

[TimH2]

I will definately pray for you. Your church probably has a group and I would check into that. There is no shame in being an addict, you became addicted because of your condition. The days of ordering over the net are just about over. You don't want to be chained to these drugs and spending all your money for them. I know, 90 pills runs out in about a week for me. It just isn't worth it anymore, you know you will have to stop sometime. Turn to God and pray for help with this. It is a very good idea to start the vitamins right now. It is going to help once you quit and might make the w/d's a little easier. My heart goes out to you and want to see you beat this. Start making a plan right now. Why don't you taper until the kids go back to school. It will make quitting a lot easier. If you want a taper plan, I will be more than happy to post it for you.

God Bless,
Tim

[chila]

Yes I have tried once before (about 18monts ago) the pain mgt doctor I am seeing on wed told me that I would have to do it cold turkey and would not prescribe anything for withdrawls...i lasted 3 days and broke down and ordered online...right now I' m at the point of not knowing wether I am in pain from the pain or if its the pain medcine that I want that makes me feel and think that i am in pain..I am also a christian and have a very supportive church family, but I have not asked for help with this problem except ..."please pray for me for better pain managemtn".  i was thinking about starting detox when the kids went back to school so they wouldn't have to witness any of this during their day...school is starting in about a month, gives me time to talk to my rhem dr and start tapering off the meds..in the meantime, would it be a good idea to start on the vitamins listed on the Thomas recipe?  God bless

[lonote]

And Tim is a great help too with lots of experience in recovery!lol! Lots of knowledge.

[lonote]

No my dear, your never hopeless. However. I would be honest with my dr. and not worried about being labled.  Your children need a mom thats all there. As does your husband need in his wife. You
can do this. And if you want to taper there are ppl out here that can be of some help. I myself am on suboxone because i'm a wuss and am trying to avoid the inevedable withdrawls. There is a gal
names fladdict and she is usually at the other site but checks in here often. She has alot of knoledge
and has been alot to many people. Good luck to you.!!! And you have a blessed day too!  Cathy

[TimH2]

Welcome to the forum.

Yes, of course there is hope for you, there is always hope. Everyone here is addicted and some are very successful. You have to be careful on cutting out the benzos and I believe you are taking one (ativan). I could be wrong and someone will correct me if so. If you could talk to your rhem doc it would be a great start to a clean life. We all lose ourselves in these evil drugs and after you are clean for some time, you will feel so much better. I am going to post the Thomas Recipe for you and it should help with the w/d's. Your first 5-7 days will be the toughest. There are many here to support and help you through this. There is not one of us that doesn't ask ourselves "how did I do this to myself" and you are not alone. Have you ever tried to quit before? It is great that your husband will support you. Please don't beat yourself up over the past and move forward!!
God Bless,
Tim
PLEASE NOTE: I am not a doctor, simply a long-time Rx opiate junkie who has had many opportunities to develop a way to detox. This is a recipe for at-home self-detox from opiates based on my experience as well as that of many other addicts. It is not intended as professional medical advice. It is always wise to make sure none of the recipe ingredients or procedures conflict with medications you may be taking. Likewise, if you have any medical condition, disease, allergy or any other health issue, consult your doctor before using the recipe. Thanks, Thomas

THOMAS RECIPE

If you can't take time off to detox, I recommend you follow a taper regimen using your drug of choice or suitable alternate -- the slower the taper, the better.

For the Recipe, You'll need:

1. Valium (or another benzodiazepine such as Klonopin, Librium, Ativan or Xanax). Of these, Valium and Klonopin are best suited for tapering since they come in tablet form. Librium is also an excellent detox benzo, but comes in capsules, making it hard to taper the dose. Ativan or Xanax should only be used if you can't get one of the others.

2. Imodium (over the counter, any drug or grocery store).

3. L-Tyrosine (500 mg caps) from the health food store.

4. Strong wide-spectrum mineral supplement with at least 100% RDA of Zinc, Phosphorus, Copper, Magnesium and Potassium (you may not find the potassium in the same supplement).

5. Vitamin B6 caps.

6. Access to hot baths or a Jacuzzi (or hot showers if that's all that's available).

How to use the recipe:

Start the vitamin/mineral supplement right away (or the first day you can keep it down), preferably with food. Potassium early in the detox is important to help relieve RLS (Restless Leg Syndrome). Bananas are a good source of potassium if you can't find a supplement for it.

Begin your detox with regular doses of Valium (or alternate benzo). Start with a dose high enough to produce sleep. Before you use any benzo, make sure you're aware of how often it can be safely taken. Different benzos have different dosing schedules. Taper your Valium dosage down after each day. The goal is to get through day 4, after which the worst WD symptoms will subside. You shouldn't need the Valium after day 4 or 5.

During detox, hit the hot bath or Jacuzzi as often as you need to for muscle aches. Don't underestimate the effectiveness of hot soaks. Spend the entire time, if necessary, in a hot bath. This simple method will alleviate what is for many the worst opiate WD symptom.

Use the Imodium aggressively to stop the runs. Take as much as you need, as often as you need it. Don't take it, however, if you don't need it.

At the end of the fourth day, you should be waking up from the Valium and experiencing the beginnings of the opiate WD malaise. Upon rising (empty stomach), take the L-Tyrosine. Try 2000 mgs, and scale up or down, depending on how you feel. You can take up to 4,000 mgs. Take the L-Tyrosine with B6 to help absorption. Wait about one hour before eating breakfast. The L-Tyrosine will give you a surge of physical and mental energy that will help counteract the malaise. You may continue to take it each morning for as long as it helps. If you find it gives you the "coffee jitters," consider lowering the dosage or discontinuing it altogether. Occasionally, L-Tyrosine can cause the runs. Unlike the runs from opiate WD, however, this effect of L-Tyrosine is mild and normally does not return after the first hour. Lowering the dosage may help.

Continue to take the vitamin/mineral supplement with breakfast.

As soon as you can force yourself to, get some mild exercise such as walking, cycling, swimming, etc. This will be hard at first, but will make you feel considerably better.

Thomas