my story may help someone I hope

Hello all I just wanted to tell my story and if it only helps one person at least I was able to do that.
I am almost 29yrs old as of Oct 20th. I have been on pain meds since I was about 18 yrs old. It started out on them by a doc not knowing what they would do to you. I was in a car wreck and messed up pretty bad. I was given 90 Lortab 10's and told if I needed more to let him know and he would see me in a month. So I got home took one anf because I had pain didn't do nothing but help pain well this went on few weeks and may back was killing me so when I went back to the doc I told him that my back was really bothering me. They did a mri (had insurance at time) and at that point found out that car accident messed my back up pretty good. So he then put me on oc 20's 2 a day and wow they really helped. I was NEVER TOLD what they would do to you or I would not have ever taken the first one but I did. Well I was on oc for about 6months and doing pretty good I run on few days early but nothing major. Well I went back to doc and he ask me if 2 was lasting me all day and I said well not always then went to 3 a day. Now 3 a day was great last and felt good all time. Let me be the first to say that I should not have been put on oc. Later found out that he was a doc pusher. Well it had been a year on oc's and I never knew how bad I was hooked and I was tired needing meds just to feel better so I thought I am going to stop taking these. Got up that morning and took nothing been few hrs and I felt awful well thought coming down with flu so went laid down in bed. Got up and I was so very sick. Called doc and nurse ask me if I had done anything different I told her that I had not taken my pain meds that day she didnt say nothing for min then she said well why don't you take meds see that helps and I thought well that is strange. But i took them. Guess what I felt better a lot wasn't sick anymore. Well nurse called me next morning and ask how I was doing? I told her that after taking my meds I was better and she said those kind meds are not the kind you just go off of. The doc well see you in 3 days. I thought when I go in to see him I'll talk to him about it. Those 3 days went by and I was sitting in doc office and lady came in crying and acting very strange, She sat down near me and I ask her if she was ok> She said no I have been out of my meds for 5 days and this is the soonest he could get me in. I then ask her what she was on and she told me something I didn't want to hear that she to was on oc. At  that point I was scared to death and changed my mind about talking to him and stopping these meds instead I went in there and told him I was in even more pain so he gave me 3 40mg a day and some lortab 10's for break thru. I went home and felt a lot better that I had extra meds in case something happen. I had no intention of taking lortabs. Well started my 40's and they made me little sick but felt wonderful and no pain in my back. Then started noticing I was taking more and more., 7 mos went by and I was taking everything he was writing but also my back seemed be getting worse couldn;t pick nothing up. So I went an had another mri. Doc said that my back had in fact gotten worse and that was first time surgery was mentioned to me. I was like wow I thought only older ppl had that done. He then wrote me few 80's a day and I was out the door. Time went by and I was getting worse and worse started running out meds and found an older lady that didn;t take her but she didn;t change crazy either and i was getting extra from her. By this time been few yrs and I was HOOKED. I had lost a ton weight and was not taking care of myself at all. My habit had gotten really bad about 300mg a day of oc. So i went to my doc and I told him that I may be dependent on the oc's. He at that point told me well if you need them you need them now at 22 what kind of doc tells a young girl that she needs that much meds and get her hooked on them like candy somene shoudl have taken his license cause he was doing this to a lot of other young girls also. Some didn;t even have medical problems by talking to others in waiting room. Few more months went by and I was so bad off couldn;t get out bed w/out doing one etc.... It was effecting my life in an awful way and alll I was doing was worrying about oc not out doing what normal 22 yrs old do. So my mom begged me to get off oc's and if I really need meds go to another doc and get on something that was not as bad, Well I agreed with her and off I went to rehab, 30 days and they were really good ppl at  rehab and I thought well this is not going to be so bad after all. They were giving me meds to help get off oc's . Valium, rls meds, and sleep meds. Well only gave those meds for 9 days and then took you of them. First day I was ok but 2 wow it hit me like a ton bricks I was hurting so bad. They sent me to see there doc. He told me that it was part rehab and I told him about my accident and he said that he could not give me NO kind of pain meds. But he did give me valium back and that helped some. I made it through those 30 days but was in pain whole time. I thought if I could make it through the 30 days when I got out I could get help for back but not the oc's ever again. Well I made it through 30 days and got out and my mom had me an appt w/doc. He was a very nice doc and my mom had already told him what my last doc did to me. So he did another mri on me and he to said that my back was really messed up and that surgery came back in pic. So I was put on lortab 10's and my surgery was scheduled for next month. I had the surgery and was laid up for 6 months and in brace for 6 months *****...But I did feel some better and i was so happy. Well after about yr here come my pain back and my doc put me back on pain meds lortab 6 a day anhttp://www.medhelp.org/posts/new_with_new_subject?forum_id=77d here story starts again. I was taking so many running out 2 weeks buying off street and so on so on. I was up to like 25 a day. Spending tons lost almost evrything. My grandmother had done some research on suboxone and told me that she would help em pay for it so I said ok.
When I first started made me feel awful so I thought well it;s new I'll try it out but never changed at all. I tried it for 6 months and stayed same whole 6 months. I would get up and take an 8mg about 15 mins later my head would start to hurt and feel sick to my stomach so I'd have to lay down for about 30 mins then help some. SO I would get back up and still have little head ache, never helped with NONE my pain at all. Then after about an hour I would start to feel real nervous now I;m usually not a nervous person in general. Then at noon take another 8mg same thing head ache lay down and get up feel same now during all this I still had all my pain so having deal with that the only thing it did was not make me withdraw from oxycotion. Well around 6pm take last 8mg one for day and guess what same thing head ache lay down etc.. Well by time it was bed time I was NEVER sleepy at all not whole 6 mos so I tried go bed and couldn;t sleep that to never before had trouble with. So finally pain go so bad I couldn;t take it no more and said this is crazy and I'm DONE. Well here kicker you have to wait 24 hrs before you can take an opiate from your last dose because it will send you into awful withdraws I told my self if I make it through this never again will I take one these things even if I have nothing an I am with drawing. wel I spent a whole day in w/draws from it plus pain and no sleep. I was at the end of my rope and ready to give up... My stepdad called me and ask me to come over. I went there and there was a number laying on table he said call this number asap. So I called and the man on other end was so very nice to me it was about Methadone. I didn;t know a lot about it and I agreed to come in 3 days later, Well I was there that morning at 6:30am. They took blood and did a check up on me.