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Avatar universal

tapering again and again and again

This is my merry-go-round.  I get my little bottle of hydro for my legit back problem. And...I know almost all of you started your drugs for legit pain.  (I had made the decision to get radio frequency lesioning...then my insurance co. wanted my MRI and THEY decided that it wouldn't help....said my back was TOO bad for that and only surgery would correct it)  So...I had planned to get off this stuff after I had the shots that I found out Friday that my insurance denied.  My dr. has  written the script for 1 every 6 hours the last couple of months....yeah right.  I've been on these since July, so that is like taking a peice of candy.I think he might have written it that way to protect himself?  So....I take my 2 every 4-5 hours, then, like now, I see that I am running way low, so I taper AGAIN.  Down to 3 total pills today, 2 tomarrow, 1 on Tues. Then I'm out of pills.  The most I've taken since July in 1 day is maybe 8, but still that is alot.  I know I am addicted.  I have been crying alot today and staying in bed...probably the holidays and some w/d going on.  Can't take advil or anything like that because of stomach problems.  I read all your posts every day and they both inspire me and frighten me. You guys are terrific! The surgery that they want me to have is major....I doubt that hydros will take care of that pain....  Any ideas?  Surgery can't happen for at least a month, unless I totally chicken out, then, I see no end to this cycle.  I am sick of it.
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225156 tn?1198893504
I had a 10-12 Vicodin tablet (5/500) per day habit since April.  Last month I decided I didn't want to use/abuse drugs anymore and tapered for over two weeks.  Today is my 21st day of sobriety.  I am so thankful for everything I have learned.
You are experiencing the emotional roller coaster of the drug - there were days when I knew I'd be running low and my depression went just as low.  When you taper like you are (and I'm probably not telling you anything new here), you wind up under-dosing and then when you get your pills - you wind up over-dosing.  It's too hard on your body and mind - thus, your mood swings and pain and discomfort come a close second.
I understand pain - I also have come to an understanding of 'discomfort' (I was diagnosed with severe RA 7 years ago).  The thing is - Celebrex works for the inflammation of my joints.  I know that now - but 3 months ago wouldn't admit it.  I also take Advil every now and then for those tough mornings/evenings.
You need to make a commitment to yourself if you want to get off these drugs.  You say you are addicted - which means that you are either on or off the drugs in the future - there is no 'in-between' when it comes to addiction.  I know it's hard - and this is probably the last thing you want to hear since you have legitimate pain - but if you make a commitment to get off the drug then THAT IS IT.  You will need to manage your pain other ways (simply taking 1 pill a day or 3 pills a week won't cut it because you'll updose and go through the same horrid cycle).  
I'm glad to see you post - truly, this is the FIRST step in recognizing you have a problem and seeking help with it.  I hope you post more and that the forum can help you successfully beat this.  
Sending positive thoughts and encouragement your way! Happy Holiday's!!!
Helpful - 1
Avatar universal
i need help i am addicted to oxycontin
Helpful - 0
318928 tn?1248177416
Addicted or not, you need to get back to your doctor.  You need to tell that person, these meds are making me sick.  I am completely addicted to them!  Its time for the doctor to take some responsibility for your treatment.  Its wholly unfair that doctors don't treat the entire person.  Is this person an MD or DO?  There is a difference in the way they treat patients for medical issues.  You need aggressive treatment, there is absolutely NO reason why you should suffer in pain or the pain of addiction.  Take action.  Keep us posted.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
thanks for your answer.  You are very correct when you talk about the emmotional rollar coaster of the drug...I never quite looked at it that way.  I can't take Advil, and Celebrex would be the wrong drug...I have no joint problems.  So, the problem is learning to manage the pain in other ways, as you said.  You are also right about the updose and the horrid cycle.  I am mean to my poor husband when I get low on the drugs, but I'm also mean to him when I'm in alot of pain, so, poor guy won't know the difference.  So, anyother good point you made...you said THAT IS IT.  I will call the pain dr. next week when he is back in and pick his brain for better ideas again.  Thank you.
Helpful - 0
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