women stuff.....

Women over 50 don't have babies because they would
put them down and forget where they left them.


A friend of mine confused her Valium with her birth control pills...
she has 14 kids but doesn't really care.  


One oflife's mysteries is how a 2-pound box of chocolates can make a
woman gain 5 lbs.


My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely.


The best way to forget your troubles is to wear tight shoes.


The nice part about living in a small town is that when you
don't know what you are doing, someone else does.


The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then,
your body and your fat are really good friends.


Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.


Sometimes I think I understand everything, and then I
regain consciousness.


I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together
and setting fire to my pants.


Amazing!
You hang something in your closet for a while
and it shrinks 2 sizes!


Skinny people irritate me!  Especially when they say things like...
'You know sometimes I forget to eat!' ......Now I've forgotten my
address, my mother's maiden name and my keys, but I have never
forgotten to eat.  


You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat!



The trouble with some women is that they get all excited
about nothing and then they marry him.


I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are
eating too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast.

Are they kidding?  That's my idea of a perfect day


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[LIZZIE LOU]

oh how i can identify with most of those...lolol

[joann1975]

HYSTERICAL!!! I love it! Thanks for the good early morning laugh!

[dominosarah]

setting fire to your pants!!!!!  Love that one!!!!