200 Days

[Ben727]

I can't believe I have been clean for so long. It feels kind of surreal actually. I went to see Soundgarden in Oakland last night. A good friend who is generally a clean guy came along. He has gout (a major bummer, folks) and was in the midst of an attack. He actually had a bottle of pills on him. My DOC. I wasn't even tempted. I thought it would be harder, but I just know I never want to go back to a life of slavery.

Cut sources, tell everyone you're an addict, get aftercare. It really works!

[clean_in_ks]

Thanks for sharing, Ben.  You have a GREAT approach/attitude.

Websters definition...of TRANSPARENT: Free from pretense or deceit.
The ability to be FRANK~

[Ben727]

That's a really good point. He knew I used to take them for my knees, but didn't know I had a problem with them. He offered them to me and I basically explained in great detail that I had developed an addition to them over the years and consequently can't take them or have them around me. I have zero shame about being an addict. I tell freaking everyone. He was very apologetic and kept them out of my sight from there on out. Having my guard up to me means never, ever thinking of those pills as anything but a ticket to hell. Aftercare (for me, a private addiction therapist) is crucial to keeping "my mind right" and not slipping, and I give that the credit for my singleminded certainty that taking pills is not the right thing for me to do, ever.

[clean_in_ks]

Don'tcha just love those ROUND numbers???? Yay for your 200 Days, Ben!
Sounds like you had a grand outing and resisted in style!  Good for you...

Did you mention anything to your friend when you found out he had your DOC on him or just ignore it?  Just curious, cause today is one of those days for me that I'd have to get it out upfront NOT to give me any and why.
As much as I've been hurtin today, I'd probably even be "eagle eyeing" where he "stashed the pills on his person".  yep, I'm an addict alright!

Otherwise, the temptation to hide and use to make my pain go away would be too great......I'm finding I have to spit it out early, if you know what I'm tryin to say.....just cause my head WILL do weird things later on down the line.  Anyhoo---didn't mean to get off on that.....just felt like a temptation I would have to head off at the pass today and wondered how you handled it.
Keep on keepin on.....next goal post here you come!

[meegWpaw]

Congratulations!  That's wonderful.  Wow you went to see Soundgarden???  Very cool.  Great that you weren't tempted.  That's quite a testament to your recovery.  Glad to hear it.  :)

[dominosarah]

Congrats ben on your clean time!  Always keep that guard up!