I am so embarressed I can't believe I let this happen to me. I am completely ashamed as I have no reason to be taking pain med at the level I was. I was doing an average of 30-40 mg a day of oxycontin. For about 6 months now straight. I have NO MENTAL addiction at this point it is purly physical as I do not ever even want to see a pill again. I have been taking very small amounts of oxycontin for the past 48 hours [5-10 mg] every 4 hours but I am going to run out here soon. I feel SO bad. Constant sweating and I know my blood pressure is a little high cuz every now and then I see some sparkles. Please don't scare me because I have a panic disorder and right now I am in a strange town with no xanax no friends or family and I don't even have a car or phone right now. So if something did happen I don't know what I would do. Is it dangerous for me to stop cold tukey? I have a beautiful baby boy and I do not want to risk loosing him by going to the hospital. I feel like I'm dying right now. I am definently having a panic attack which I'm sure makes my bp worse which in turn makes anxiety worse. Will xanax help ? I do not have a prob with xanax I know how easily you can be addicted to it and I am not going down that route but would it help with blood pressure. OMG please someone help me. I keep googling trying to find someone simular to my situation but people take higher doses and say dont cold turkey and lower doses saying dont worry about it. Please help me!
I have no support, no family or friend, and my boyfriend is out of town and I have no way to contact him.. if you read this and know ne thing please reply I am so anxious I keep hitting refresh just to hope someone is out there.. please...
Hey I'm here. I was snorting over 100 mgs of oxy a day and jumped. I know how horrible it is. Your in for a rough time but it can be done. I am a mom too and when I was detoxing my kids were only 1 and 2 years old. Is there ANYONE you can call and ask to come help you out? If not it's still doable and 40mgs isn't that bad (compared to many peoples intake) but yes, you need to stop for your sake and the sake of your child.
Have you read the Thomas recipe yet? Get the stuff for it, it really does help. For me hot baths were a lifesaver. Keep posting and you will find that this is an amazing forum for support; Don't be ashamed - be proud that you are finally doing something to turn your life around. One thing I want to say though is to get some aftercare lined up right away. Wjether it be NA meetings, an addictions counsellor whatever works for you. Getting clean is one thing but staying clean is another. The mental aspect of this addiction is what gets most people (got me thats for sure) and getting into a serious aftercare program can make all the difference.
Please read thriough the health pages here and have a look at the Thomas recipe and get the stuff for it. Like I said, it really does help. And keep posting.
Is your baby with you now? How far away from family and friends are you? Panicking isn't going to help anything. I know you can't help that. You need to get in touch with someone if you've got the baby with you. I really don't know if it's dangerous to go cold turkey or not. I think I've seen on here other people that got off oxycontin and Percocet cold turkey but I'm not sure.
What I am sure of, though, is you need to have someone with you, especially if your baby is with you. Why can't you reach your boyfriend? I'm sure someone with some experience going through this will answer you soon. Sometimes it takes time for someone to respond.
In the meantime, try to take some deep breaths and try to calm down a little.
And yes, you can take xanax (its prescribed to you right?) and that will help with the wds And unless you have pre existing health problems opiate addiction just feels horrible but many people get through it. But if you have any doubts then please see a doctor who can maybe prescribe some blood pressure meds to help you. We can offer you support and tips on how to lessen the impact of the withdrawls but were not doctors and if at any time you think you need help then please go straight to the doctor.
I used the Thomas recipe and since I am presribed xanax for an anxiety disorder I used it to help with the wds. Just go easy on it and you can count on feeling crappy for a week with days 3,4 usually being the worst. If you have any friend, family that can come and help you with the baby while you have the "flu" that would be great. If you lived closer I'd come over myself and help you! lol. Not kidding, I know how hard it is. Relax, you will get through this and we'll be here for you 100%.
But about that aftercare - please get it. I thought I could do it on my own and ended up relapsing after detoxing twice off 100mgs a day. I lasted about a month and the mental aspect just got to me. Had I had a stronger aftercare plan in place I most likely could have endured it so please make sure you get to a meeting or counsellor as soon as your physically able to. You might not think your mentally addicted but why not play it safe and have something in place anyways. it won't hurt and chances are it will help you a lot not to mention you'll connect with some great people and get the support you need. Friends who will be there for you. When I went to my first NA meeting I got a list of names and ended up making a very good friend there. Until then I had isolated myself during my addiction and didn't have anyone to talk to. Going there helped to change that and I plan on making meetings a regular thing. You should too.
You can do this and you will find a ton of support here from people who are kind hearted and know exactly what you are going through. If you have epsom salts throw some in the tub, I found that really helped with the sore muscles and rls. Keep posting and stay strong
from what i read you said you are having a panic attack and you suffer from panic disorder so FIRST thing right now is to calm down yourself. You are not going to die, OK? :)
you sure know these breathing exercises advised to relax yourself in a moment like this so, pls, start breathing very slowly, very deep, again, very slowly...take your time to mantain a profound breathing and concentrate only in doing this..it's your priority now to control your panic attack.
you'll have time to read and follow wd's advices afterwards ( you've already been given some to start with ) but first thing for you now is to deal with your panic attack, missthing.... one thing after the other, you gonna get better, ok? :)
Breath ,this may help you. Its what I use to handle may panic attacks. I breath in threw my nose out threw my mouth while I count backwards from 200.It has been a life saver for me as I don't use benzos because of the addiction possibilities .
WD from oxy will not kill you. So its ok relax .I know you feel really bad but within a week you will feel so much better .Taking the small amounts of oxy a day might end up prolonging your wd.Hang in the hun it does get better
I think you should head to the clinic and get some clonodine to help with your blood pressure and ask for a refill on your xanax..if I understand you have none? Is there one within walking distance of your house? Also getting out and going for a walk would probably help with your panic attack, while your out pick up the rest of the stuff for the Thomas recipe. It can really help with the wds. Keep posting and know that you will get through this and give yourself and your baby a much better future. You should be proud of yourself for taking this step. Now try to calm down, do the deep breathing the other poster suggested and take it from there.
OK this is so close to what im going through but no panic attacks i just started googling cause i feel so lost and alone and scared and ashamed i dont think i can stay off of oxy i keep quitting but i cant stay off im a mother and i guess a piece of trash i want to quit but i cant admit to anyone whats happening to me i want to say more but i need to stop crying first
Your not a piece of trash, not at all. You have become addicted to one of the most addictive pills our time has ever known. There are so many people that got hooked on oxy. If you were a "piece of trash" you wouldn't care and wouldn't even try to get off them. The fact you are trying says that you are a person who needs help and you've come to the right place. You should start a new post and tell us how much your taking, how long you've been addicted and what day your on in detox and we can help you more if we get a few more details.
Your life is worth saving and the people here can help you do that. Have a look at the Thomas Recipe in the health pages on this site. It can really help take some of the bite out of the withdrawls. If you have been through this before then you know that it takes about a week with days 3 and 4 being the worst, generally speaking. Have you sought out any aftercare in the past? That is a MUST. I found out the hard way. Whether it be NA meetings, a therapist or both, some type of aftercare can really make a difference in the outcome of your detox. keep posting and stay strong. you can do this!!
You guys are amazing. There are so many of us out there.. and we are not sterero typical drug addicts.. we are mothers and good ones at that. Its so nice to see people going through the same thing..... well ... maybe I put that wrong but u know what i am saying. I can't walk anywhere.. I live in the country and there is no store nearby. I am staying strong for now but I have a feeling after the little bits I have left are gone it is going to be much worse.. or am I wrong? Because I am only doing 10 mg at a time so am I correct in assuming the worst of the withdrawls are past ?
"Your not a piece of trash, not at all. You have become addicted to one of the most addictive pills our time has ever known. There are so many people that got hooked on oxy. If you were a "piece of trash" you wouldn't care and wouldn't even try to get off them. The fact you are trying says that you are a person who needs help and you've come to the right place."
Thank you I know I needed to hear that.
OK addicted for about a year the least i take is 30 mg a day the most being 90-120 mg a day. I would say i have stopped 6 times on my own ever time i swore i would remember what detoxing was like and that would help me stay off but it doesn't. I havent taken any since the 13th i weaned myself down taking 1/4 every 4-6 hours until i was out i have taken some other pills since then so im not really doing any better i just want to feel like I used to before pills before pain and the depression is crushing and its a secret from everyone like I have 2 lives and I don't think its over I get off but i guess I haven't made it long enough to feel normal do you ever feel normal again I just always feel like garbage and don't sleep but a couple hours a night its like dying slowly over and over i want off i need to be done
If I go to an NA meeting say I ever did relapse.. will my child be taken from me. There is no other reason besides use of drugs that would even be near questionable. Besides that dark area in my life I know I am an excellent mother. I need to go to NA meetings.. I do NEED support.. I know I can't do it without. I also want to renew my relationship with God. I've jus been sitting here thinking about what I've done to my life. I'm gonna do this. This person I have become is not me.
I am sorry if I don't respond to everyone individually but I am sure you know my brain is mush right now.
ok im sitting here reading all of your posts and they made my burst out in tears and I cant stop crying. Im in the same situation and you and I want off of these freaking meds. They are horriable life destroying pills. Im addicted to oxycodone also. At first i was just doing what the dr told me to do but soon realized i was hooked, I was given them for chronic pain and now I have been on them for 3 years and I have started abuseing them and I to feel like trash. I have a great family a beautifull home and so much more but yet I feel like I always need a freaking pill to enjoy all of them. Ughhhh i hate this already. Im so happy I found this site It has helped me alot and I also talked to a wonderfull person on the phone today I met on here and he is helping me alot as well and I now know Im not alone in this addiction and there is alot of people going thru the same as me. I have a dr opp coming up soon and Im going to tell my dr I am done with these meds and to give me something to help with the withdrawls. I hope they understand and help me because Im so scared of getting sick its horriable. I am now the person I said I would never ever become. I do not snort them but I take more than im supposed to on a daily basis and I always tell myself next month Im going to take them right and I never ever do so I know what you are going thru and I hope we can all get clean together Thank you so much for reading this.
HI I just wanted to chime in and encourage you... for that mater all 3 of you (armywife &lostashell) this is something that is DOABLE it just takes some perseverance
try to not panic or have fear about doing this....it is always worst in our minds then it actually is...this is 1/3 physical and 2/3 mental so prepare yourself by going into this with a win win attitude ...get comfortable with the saying.."you just got to be ok without being ok for a wile" what your going thew is only temporary it like ketching the flu nobody wants it but it happens and the symptoms are very similar with some added anxiety and we all have went thew the flu b/4 and survived ...you have been given a lot of good advise already...I would like to add a few more things...dont under estimate a hot bath it releaves a lot of the symptoms you may need to take several a day for the next few days....try and take a walk if you can...getting out in the sun and fresh air helps it also gets your mind off how miserable you feel...try and stay bizzy again it takes your mind off of it if you just sit and lay there the symptoms seam to get worst ...when its really getting to you and you cant get out try laying on the couch with some soft music playing in the background lay there with your eyes closed and just get lost in the music..this is especially good when you cant sleep...If you believe in God pray with all your heart.....Jesus came to set the captives free and theirs not to much more captivating then addiction ...I cant over emphasize how God got me thew my withdrawals you can pray that he eaz the symptoms...when it 3am he's all you got and he does here those that call out his name ...hang in there and just know....it is so so worth it in the end good luck and God bless...I said a prayer for all 3 of you....Gnarly
God has helped me so much in this. Without him I will not make it.
For the past 3 days [since monday morning] I have only had one 40mg pill. I did a small amount monday before I went.. or TRIED to go to sleep. I split the lines up yesterday and did more yesterday then today but I'm not sure what. After today there is nothing. But I have had withdrawls for 3-4 days from going from 50mg a day to about an average of 15 a day so when I drop cold turkey tomorrow the withdrawls can only be as bad as they have already been right ? Because I dropped down about 35 mg and now Im only dropping 15.. so things will stay steady crappy but at least not get worse..
Does anyone know ?
Your doing great! And nobody will take your kids if you go to an NA meeting. The people you meet there are just like you and I and they have kids too. They can and will help you SO MUCH if you let them. I suggest going to one as soon as your physically able to. Start looking for meetings in your area now and try to go to different meetings. I ended up meeting so many good people in NA and one girl I've gotten very close with. The first time I went these ladies gave me a list of their phone numbers to call when I needed someone to talk to. Calling one of those numbers is how I ended up making that close friend I was talking about. You are on the road to recovery and should be very proud of yourself!! Stay strong and keep posting! How are you doing tonight?
I just wanted to tell you 3 girls this is doable. I am a single mother so to speak of a 8 year old and 5 year old special needs child their dad lives 2 hrs away in a sober living enviroment. I had been on 15 mg immediate release oxycodone 8x a day for my broken back. I went cold turkey on my daughters 8th birthday she helped me flush them down the toilet. it hasn't been easy but this is day 7 and the physical withdrawls are gone. Hot baths are your friends...Without hot baths I don't know if I would have made it. You girls can do it. Just remember your stronger than any addiction and any time you need strenght look in your kids eyes. i found my strenght in my kids when I felt like my withdrawls were too much I thought about all the hurt I had put my kids through, my daughter one day when I was out of pills came to me and said here mommy you can have my piggy bank money to go get pills so you will feel better that killed me you girls can do it
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