Adderall addiction

[AML]

I recently discovered that my 49 year old wife has been taking my sons adderall (adderrall) for a year.  She has been taking 20mg. per day.  She also takes celexa for depression.  I am concerned that she is addicted and will have withdrawal problems.  I have hidden the adderall (adderrall) from her and she no longer has it available.  She relizes that she has a problem and has commited to quit.  What are the withdrawal symptoms, how soon after she has quit to they show, how long to they last and how can I help.

Thanks,
AML

[OxyDout]

There isn't much you can do besides be there for her, like we always say, SHE HAS TO WANT TO DO IT.  Plus, I may be wrong, but I have dabbled with adderoll (sp) and ridalin, 20mg is not that much, is she snorting it?? Its more of a psychologically addicting drug, as skip had once told me. If she is REALLY only taking 20mg a day and she isn't taking anything else (addicts always lie no matter who they are lying to, remember that) then the withdrawal I would assume should be minimal. However, if she is taking much more then she is telling you about then, it might be a bigger issue. Make sure she comes completely clean with you!! Keep posting.

GWH

[Francoise]

Don't know much about this stuff, but I wonder if sudden cessation of this stuff is dangerous? As in benzo? I believe it might be a good idea to find out of 20 mg of this stuff over a year (IF, IF that's the truth) stopped suddenly will cause seizures of the fatal kind.

Anybody got any skinny on this?

Francois

[AML]

She is not snorting it and I am pretty confident that it is only 20mg. per day.  If it were greater than that my son would be running out more frequently than he is or has been.  I dont doubt that she is lying as she has had addictions in the past with various amphetamines.  I would not, however, know where she would be getting it if not from  my son's scrip. I am really concerned for her health as she has been through a bone marrow transplant and can be quite frail at times.  Does anybody know what the withdrawal symptoms are?  I have searched all over the web and cannot find answers anywhere.  She does not want any of her Dr's. to know as she is very embarrased.

Thanks,
Tim

[hippy]

i hope your fairing well today, i guess you are at home resting.  Is this the last of the work on your knee.
I was wondering , did you hurt it playing sports.
IM 43 and i still suffer from sports injuries that i got back in my teens and twenties.
The hard thing for me has been i work in union construction.
Of course with my addictive personality i have to work harder and do more than everyone else. I look back and wish i would have streched a lot more. I think being flexable would have saved me from going through a lot of the pain i went through, and still go through. Im 6/2 and 190 and i struggle to keep at that. Some day,s my hamstrings get so tight i think there going to snap. the discipline to stretch some days  seems to be nonexsistent. I do some yoga ,some ice ,rest. But it always seem like a pill would be so much easier.
my pain these days is not bad. I guess im getting smarter.
By just taking it easier , and not working so many hours.
My wife of 13 years is alway on my case about it.
I was once was told, IF IT AIN'T PRACTICAL IT AIN'T SPIRITAL!

I had rotator cuff operations on both sholders.
I have osgoodslatters in both knees ,also a knee operation.
I also got my foot ran over by a ridinding mower, luckly i had
150.00 boots on ,but it still got all broken up , had to have a few screws put in  ect. All is ok now all things considdered, just can,t dive off of a diving board.  the knee's still hurt mostly
in the dead of winter. I can't work over my head to long or go bowling, because of thr shoulder's.

well i hope your feeling better today, i know the mental part is some times the hardest.                    peace

[mrmichael67]

Withdrawal symptoms are mental depression, nausea or vomiting, stomach cramps or pain, trembling, unusual tiredness or weakness.  Adderall (adderrall) is an amphetamine.  Another brand name is Dexedrine.  As far as you not being able to find anything on the web, do a search on Google.  Tons of stuff.

[oh please already]

please,ive had a relly rotten two days but i dont want anyone to read into it it.I had a rotten scum doctor true,but there are good people who want to help,i know im a nurse,and you would be amased how many medical workers understand and are are willing to give all.I just made the mistake of not knowing who my friends are and i think thats why i am so crazy,there are some things you can do alone and some you nned help.dont be afraid of asking for help,if the first person doen't listen then ask another.My case was thinking my dealer was my friend but when all drugges sober up they relise that friends dont try to kill you,friends tell you the truth,even if you dont like it,because they love you and dont want to see you hurt and a really good friend will even risk your friendship if that what it take to make you listien,anyway after having a while to think,i want to say mrmichael,i still think your ways are harsh,but dont leave the forum,hippys right everyone has a place here,and maybe yours is to provoke,to make people listen Which if i think about is what you DID say.so lets agree to disagree and move on

[hippy]

i hope you have a better night than last, and i hope your next few day are better.
You know the pendulum swings both way s, sometimes things are great ,then you have to prepare for the swing twards the negitive. your last post seems to be a swing in the positive.
I to have had a rough 24 hours., so i just say to my self
so what ,ive been through hell and back at different times during my life. so to put it in perspective things are not so bad  right now. so im suffering a little, it will pass.
Your last post was inspiring , mature and kind .very nice to read.
so we all have to take the good with the bad , there is a far greater  agenda at work here.                 peace and comfort

[oh please already]

thanks for the kind words'i have had a few good teachers in tolerance in the last few weeks on this forum, (((( :) ))))  Tonight sucks thank you,Ive never really been in full blown withdrawl before,but to tell u the truth now that i am not so terrifed,I think I can do it(That statement IS subject to change moment to moment of course)no,its true spending the last few weeks,finding people who have done it who not only didnt die ,but managed to keep there humor has given me great hope.Iv spent th last few hours watching scarface(Never saw it before)and thinking about how my "FRIENDS'have benfited from my sickness is a very eyeopening thing,for the 1st time i understand what law enforcement is talking about,I always thought that partying was a victumless crime,but all those times I dabbled in pot and coke ,(That doctors house isnt so small either)really did support people who were Laughing all the way to the bank,as grandma would say(**** there is a spider as big as a egg on my desk,wait)  all gone  I keep asking myself why it is that i dont have a problem with other drugs,I like pot,love coke,why can i just walk away,not fixate on others and yet these pills haunt me.Thanks again to everyone for begin there,I know that i am going on and on but just a few weeks ago i found that i never thought about things that mattered and now i find i cant stop thinking.Its kinda like seeing color for the first time,everythings still as it was and yet so much deeper and richer,with details to look at and notice that iv never seen before.Begin wasted did numb the pain,i just didnt relize how much it muted the the joy.or how much my 4 year old really talks and talks and talks  I guess she gets it from her mother  LOL

[oh please already]

I am so angry I could spit!I just went ot my family doctor, a man i have been using for two plus years.In the last 3 weeks i have gone to all my doctors and told them of my abusse of drugs and i have to tell u not one was understanding which i do understand because i lied to them BUT this dotor i didnt lie too.We have spoke many time of my problems and he would give me the speech and then just fill out a new rx.) i guess it was eazer to keep me quiet)ANYWAY tonight i went with my list of Thomas recipe figuring that i would check with him if ther were ok to take with the meds im aready taking(I do have real medical issues and take blood pressure pill,predinsone,and multi others)Now keep in mind I have never asked this man to give me narcotics,he offers telling me they are the best choice for me.So i go in ,come clean,and ask if I should take the xanax(which HE insists i take,(i have some because i dont use it when i get it filled anyway)or the valium that all the treatment plans id found say is a better choice for the jitters  im anticapating the next few days im going to have from withdrawl and he says to me"your an addict, u need rehab"   ok  ,i explain i dont have the money or anyone to watch the baby while i would be away(which he knows becuse he's aware of my family dynamics)so he says" Give her to the state,"I say r u out of your fu--ing mind? then he says "maybe i"ll call them 4 u ,if u cant",NOW im crazy and i say  whoa wait,its not like im a f--ing junky,with a needle in my arm,i was taking what YOU gave me,I didnt come asking U MY DOCTOR TOLD ME TO TAKE THIS,YOU said it was the right thing to do.And he says"your right,i made a MISTAKE,and now YOUR a addict and I DON"T TREAT ADDICTS..There is not a word to decribe how i am feeling right now.and so , now what?

[oh please already]

and so that shows an addict is addict,I am not going to let this s--t of a human begin cause me to fail.I am going to start the recipe anyway,screw it If i die at lleast my daugher will know that i died TRYING,not because i gave up.and so the moral of this story is NEVER TRUST ANYONE,exspecialy someone who takes money for u,A "Doctor will sell u out,1st by giving u something that will kill you when THEY dont have all the facts(I never understood how taking 3 40mg tablets of oxy would be better 4 me then 70 mg of percocet but i trusted him,and put the pill in my own mouth and yes,i was looking for a better high,he just made it much easyer when he knew i had a promblem)and then will sell you out again when the **** hits the fan with the FDA(if there wasent all this hype on t.v.with congress invoved I know that this man would of let me Quietly continue to kill myself,one because it was easy money,he got paid 160 dollors to  write 15 words  on a paper,,but now hesafraid of begin accountable,that some one whould see that he doesnt know what tha f--k hes doing,and is a dangerous man. SO my advice it to remember these facts.I forgot who started this thread but whoever did ask yourself this,If your wife was taking from your childs rx,then the script whould run short causing her to call for refills early,this is also a tightly controled drug,and yet your doctor wrote for extra,if it came down to him explaining to the DEA why he wasnt closely montoring a CHILDS meds,didnt question if the child was getting the right dose,didnt keep tight records that he required to by LAW who do u think he will sell out Himself? or your Family?I am sorry that I am rambling on but t kept me from going insane.Do u think he will really call CPS?and what could they do?Its been weeks since ive gotten "extra scipts"Other then this i am a great mom,my daughter has everything,is healty,happy and just got a clean bill of health at her 4 yr old check up.The only thing anyone who doent know this sceret will see is that shes not up to date with all her shots,i refuse to give her the chicken pox shot,its untested in children and i refused to put any extra drugs in her body she doesnt need... but there are secrets they could find if they went looking..other then that i just dont know and i thougt i couldnt sleep before,do u think that god is testing me?or maybe she would be better off... a few weeks ago i was pushing that thought around in my mind and maybe im begin punshed now for thinking it.without her i will die.Im so worried im too late,maybe trying is not enough  who ever said it was right its the secerts that will kill you

[oh please already]

sorry i keep rambling but i need a favor,this boardbut if i do stop postin has become my lifeline,i depend on it and read it many time a day just to pass 10 min without putting a pill in my mouth, and i am having a LOT of trouble holding on right now,I am scaring myself if you can understand that so please dont put in writing what i fear so much,I know wht might happen,but putting in writing might make it too real to deal with right now and if i see that what my worse fears are might be what other people see too,i dont think i would be able to cope with that ,.. just yet,im not stupid i already know but i also know that any more pressure will snap the tightrope i am walking.I vented in the last 2 postings and it has helped me calm down but i am still too frightened not to look at the world from behind my fingers like when u watch a scary movie,u know what might be coming but u cant bear to see the whole scene at once

[mrmichael67]

I feel sorry for your situation, but I wanted to address one issue you had.  In regards to the 40 mg oxy three times a day compared to 70 mg of percocet.  Do you realize how much tylenol is in those percocets?  Each drug has oxycodone in it, period. Oxycontin coming in such potent doses is what creates the problem with tolerance.  And, taking it beyond prescribed doses also creates problems.  I am no better than anyone else, but that is true.  I would be willing to fight for oxycontin till the day I die.  If taken as per labeling, oxycontin is a safe and valuable drug in the pain management arsenal of weapons.  That's what I don't understand about the thinking of oxycontin being so addictive.  It is the way people are taking it that makes it that way.  Sure, you have a bunch of 80's and are crushing them and snorting them, you will have a problem quick.  If you were taking percocet, the same results will happen, just a whole lot slower.  I am not defending your doc as he seems to be a real winner, but him prescribing oxycontin was completely called for.  Actually, I wish I had been prescribed oxycontin back when I really needed it.  I might not have had to get used to taking a whole bunch of percs just to make the pain less severe.  If I were treated properly when I should have been, I might not have the tolerance I enjoy today.  There is nothing evil about oxycontin, when used properly!

[oh please already]

no **** sherlock,what is your point?I know I have a problem,I told the doctor so,he increase to16 perc a day and after a while said the tylenol was too much.Storys good so far.then he gave me oxycotin 40mg 3 times a day,it was like i told him I cant stop thinking about these pill so he said heres more so dont worry,be happyand i was UNTIL my life started to fall apart and when i went back and said i didnt want to do this anymore,im getting withdral when i run out,and he says if your getting withdrawl your an addict and i dont treat addicts getting nasty now..ok I sayWait,I am getting withdral from a med U started me on,medical fact people build tolerance to narcotics..Why did you start me on this if u dont know how to stop me ?So then he says If u cant quit alone then your an addict .(He's panicing now I guess,He must be thinking the same thing,watches cnn,He knows that this is a high profile drug right now and here I am making a stink that he gave it to me,could it be that he might be responable and even liable for making me an addict?(I saw the gears running in his head)NOW MIND YOU I DID NOT GO IN FOR ANY DRUGS REFILLS,all i brought was my list of vitamins and aminos to make sure that I woulnt have a drug reaction,I DIDNT EVEN WANT XANAX,i had.I just wanted to let him know that i was going to go into withdrawl,so if anything happened,he could help me.He was my doctor. my friend.    Im very glad that your having no problem with your drug intake,   but why are you here?  I know that before i became a addict,I would of never of hung out T*H*E*M*,  no! not a drug addict!!! .But look here you are.!!WHY??  well its 430 in the morning and ive used up all my anger .everyone have a good day

[Deason]

I hope your were able to get some sleep last night.  Things can seem so much worse in the middle of the night.  Today is a new day.  I would like to address a few things you wrote about.  First, it sounds like your doctor acted very irresponsibly and he knows it.  Please try and find a new doctor as soon as possible (especially because you stated you have real medical problems). There are many good ones out there.   Secondly, I highly doubt this doctor will be calling CPS considering his actions in this matter.  He would be drawing attention to a situation I'm sure he would rather forget.  Now it is time to look forward.  You are doing the right thing NOW and that is all that matters.  Get clean with the support of everyone here and then if any of the other "stuff" (doc hopping) comes back to haunt you, you will be in good shape to handle it.  Please stay in touch.

[Creamie]

I don't mean to post where I shouldn't, but please ,anyone I posted in the next question, the one on coke, I just jumped in on that thread. I don't want it lost...If anyone could respond... Creamie

[cindi]

You are so right Re;  the oxycontin,,,,your post was right on the money,,,even though I have had multiple addiction problems I was very honest with my doc about it and he in fact did feel the oxycontin was the best a safest route for me to go....if taken properly it is far less dangerous than all the percs, vicodin etc. that I had taken...it basically has given my life back to me   not to mention the miracles it has worked for my husband. I love to see you on the boards  you are as usual very insightful...~~~CINDI~~~

[mrmichael67]

Can't you read?  It was pretty clear what you said about the oxy and percs.  I didn't say one thing to bash you, so why the comment?  Not my fault you have your head up your ass!

[GOD]

Hey, Hey Hey! Everybody just calm down..... I think Meagain was in a pretty bad mood last night/this morning.. Withdrawl can do that. Remember, we're here to help, so let's keep the discussion civil. This place has done wonders for me, and has helped to  keep me SANE sometimes. Yes, VENTING is a GOOD thing -- but NOT when directed towards personal attacks against one another.

Everyone-- Have a great day and keep posting!
Jess

[oh please already]

go away liitle boy, i dont have time to play with you

[lanas]

Hey--Michael is a really good guy; he's not trying to hurt you or anything.  He was just giving his opinion about the valid uses of oxy and the concerns of percs. I've read his posts for a long time; he's okay.  I can tell you're very frustrated.  Just keep posting; let us help you.  You're going to have really rough times and it was really nasty of your doctor to treat you the way he did; so you just need to try to focus as best you can to get through the next couple of weeks.  But you will be okay.  I have had a really rough time, but I'm about 2 months clean and am feeling very very good now.  It can be done--and I have a 4 year old too and am enjoying her so much more now.  You'll be okay.  Keep posting and let us help you;  we want to help, okay?

[skipper]

hey people!!:
EVERYONE JUST CALM DOWN! OK IF YOU CAN DO THAT READ ON, IF NOT, GO SOMEHERE ELSE TO SPEW YOUR HATEFUL STUFF, DISQGUISED AS AD-
VISED!!

first things first:
mrmichael67:
you are one monumental piece of work! although i find fault with nothing you have said in this thread, i do find fault with the way you say almost anything! lighten up, or please post on some tough guy board where your talk would carry some weight there (but i doubt it would. tough guys usually aren't, face to face!!)
deason:
top notch advice. too bad some people have other agendas, than
helping people with substance abuse problems. keep up the excel-
ent posting. i believe you are a most valuable addition to this
board!!
meagain: i for one am sorry for people like Mrmichael. your post
as important to me as anyone's are. please keep posting!
keep an angel on you shoulder!
kip


deason:
top notch advice! what more can be said, except you are probably
endowed with compassion and wisdom that mrmichael could use just
a little of (got any to spare?).

[oh please already]

i aplogise to everyone for begin nasty,your right i shoulnt take my probems out on others BUT..I have notice in michaels posts how he is always so quick to put shall we say ,other peoples accompishments in perspective-hes quick to point out to the person who is now taking 3-4 vicodin that it is the same narcotic tolerance as oxy,so she really failed,now it is true what he says but i think damm good for you ,if u couldnt control one,u had the strenght to know it,address it and control it.you win,good for you.Who am I to point out your faults.I find it intresting to read what michael writes ,but I do question he's own self awareness,he says oxy is a wonder drug,true,he says that he wishes that he had gotten it so he would not have the tolerance he now has,and this is where i get confused-hasent he pointed out many times that all narcotic share the same tolerance(allowing for the conversion factor of course,ex 10 ms inject=75mg im=30 mg oxycoDONE by mouth=2mg daludid iv,i could go on but i made my point)so i want to know how having to take more percocet for pain control increased his tolerance,counting out the issues of tylenol,why was is ok for him to self medicate,because his doc was uninformed?why does his real pain (and most people on this forum seem to have real medical issues)justifyself treatment and others not.hes quick to point out that other people should take account of what there doing,but he doesnt,wheather he had oxy or perc he would have to take the same amount to get relief,but its his doctors fault becase he didnt presribe the right dose,not that he put more pills in his mouth.why didnt HE speak up if it is so easy?I appaud all the people on this forum who are stong enough to admit a promblem they made.I wish a few of them WOULD take something so they didnt suffer so,but i think that its people like mrmichael who make them feel guilty,that its wrong,that there weak,There are at least 3 people on this forum who had surgery this week and there all suffering because someone made them feel like they had no selfcontrol,so my question to mr michael is where was your control when you were getting yours?    again i am sorry for getting nasty.

[hippy]

I know thing' s can get tough when your in the process of kicking on your own. You sound like your on the right track.
Im 16 day's clean  just using the recipe.
As far as people giving advice , there is an old saying
DONT GIVE ADVICE UNLESS ASKED' OR THE NEWCOMER WILL LOSE ANY RESPECT THEY MIGHT HAVE HAD FOR YOu.
The recipe is doing wonders for me., I was taking 15 perc's a day.  If you have any question's I would direct them tward,s some of the people on this site who seem to have a lot of experence and kindness. some one like spipper and his wife
irish rose. they seem to have the answers to most of the question,s ive seen on this fourm.
I think we all know most of the problem's regarding abusing
pill,s it's the solution's we need.
Putting people down is just un called for. We do enough of that to ourselve's.

[mrmichael67]

I don't understand what you mean by a tough guy board.  I didn't draw first blood here.  If you don't disagree with anything I said, than what is your point?  I haven't said anything that would make me a 'tough guy'.  My second post in this thread was meant to be taken the way I wrote it.  Kip, if you have a problem with me, I don't know why.  I haven't done anything to you or anyone else here.  Although I am not new here, I generally choose not to post here for this very reason.  Just seems like there is always someone with a chip on his or her shoulder, and it's not me.  And, I am speaking about the vast minority here.  I stand behind my record of helping others, and if someone has a problem with me then it is exactly that, their problem.  But, when it comes to people bashing oxycontin, I do tend to get a little un-nerved.  And, I do have a problem with people blaming others for the very pills that they, themselves ingested.  I am prescribed oxy for cp and do abuse them from time to time.  I feel I am no better than anyone else here.  But, I do take responsibility for my own actions.  Like I said, I haven't done anything to anyone here.  And, I took the first shot.  Actually, I have taken three from two different people.

[oh please already]

ok now.   There is no denying that michael is correct in the facts he quotes,but one thing i have learned in my life is that there are people who get it=and people who dont,even if you spell it out(sad i think)I think that right now I need to spend my energy on postive things that matter and so if I remember I think that the thread was about helping someone who doesnt think they have a problem,aml wants to know,and as many people who were trying to help,took the time to point out,there is no point to tellin a person who doent want help ,that they have a problem, a person needs some sort of self insight to admit to themselfs the truth.I just wont to say that because a person is not ready to get help,that does not mean that you should allow that person to bring you down,we are only responable for ourselfs.I should of stood up to my doctor,I Knew i was getting over my head but it was hard to stand up to someone who was A PROFESSIAL,I should of insisted but I didnt,and I think that he had a responsablity to listen,which he didnt.But you dont sell out people,at least I dont .PROFESSINal are not always right,they may have all the facts stright,but they dont see the big picture.

[mrmichael67]

The point I was trying to make on that one thread you are referring to is that the person who kicked the oxy but was still on the vicodin had basically replaced one for the other.  Other than that, I haven't picked out people's faults.  I don't know if you go over to the other forum or not, but if you were to check it out, you would see the type of advice I give people.  Obviously, the comment on the other thread was taken the wrong way.  For that, I am sorry.  As I have stated, that was not my intention.  Other than that, I think a lot of what you wrote in your last post is way out in left field.  Like I said, go check out the other forum at http://pub37.ezboard.com/bthenewaddictionmedicineforum and you will see who I am.  I have never mocked anyone or knocked them for anything.  Lord knows I have many issues identical to the ones that people here have.  And, I have never claimed otherwise or tried to make it seem so through the way I write.  I am sure I could go back to the last post and take more from it to comment on, but what is the use?  And, if you were offended in any way, I am sorry.  I certainly have nothing against you.  On that note I will say adios to this forum.  I know where my home is.  By the way, the b in the link is not a typo.

[oh please already]

thank you  I wish you peace

[hippy]

I as hopeing you might change your mind about leaving this fourm.
we all need each other other's insight and experence.
One thing that has really helped me over the years is allowing
people to be where thier at, and that includes letting others make  mistake's. we need to let each other have bad day's.
If i cut everyone out of my life who made me feel bad or critisized  me, i would be all alone.
I was taught to alway's ask myself WHERE CAN I BE WRONG<.

I spent years blaming others and that is just imature denile.
Any way your imput about perc's and vike's and hydro's being the same as ox'es , in my experence is true . tne oxicotin just is stronger and has no acetametphene like you said.
In my area a lot of young kid's have been dying ,while abusing the oxicotin. Myself, i stayed away from the ox'es because i alway's had a problem over doing it with pill,s.
I would take 10 to 15 perc's a day. If i had oxicotin i would
have had a impossible time taking 2 or 3 a day. I would have probley taken 5 or 10.
this just reaffirm's ther is somthing wrong with me.
that's why im here 16 day's cold turkey on the receipe.
THANKS TO PEOPLE ON THIS FOURM LIKE YOURSELF>

so thanks for your posting.
we are all here because weare not all there.

ps. IF I AM NOT THE PROBLEM THERE IS NO SOLUTION>

[groovygirl]

how are you all?  i just got back from disney world after having a GREAT time!  i have thought about you and wondered if everyone is ok...i'm doing ok - a bit depressed to be back to dreary new england tho...

[angst]

i've been on benzo's for 21 years.  i've been to rehab over a
opiate addiction and they try to address the benzo's.  the thought of not having them around scares the hell out of me.
i'm on methadone for the second time.  it works for craving the needle.  but it does nothing for agoriphobia (sic).  i mean that i cannot leave the house without the use of benzo's.  i've tried all the sri's and new neuroleptics.  i've read rem therapy and everything else i can get my hands on.  the doctor i see now is trying to reduce my dosage of xanax.  i've taken everything from ativan at 14 years old to klonopin to serax to xanax.  i also have asthma.  i had an m.i. in the last treatment center when they tried to take me off the xanax.  any body have an idea other than prayer?

[angst]

i could really use some feedback.  any one with experience using long-term benzo's.  i know seizures are to be expected.  i just do not know how to finally get off the benzo's without dying.  the last time scared me when i had the heart attack(m.i.).  i do not trust many people in the medical field.  i've been there myself.  i would love to be free of the benzo habit.  then i could get off the methadone, and finally be drug free for the first time in over 21 years.  i cannot afford any more treatment. i spent my entire inheritance on rehab.  i have to go to work now!  no more problems.  i could just go back to the doctor and tell him how it is.  it would work for a few more months. but i might have to really face this somewhere down the road.  any suggestions would be appreciated.   Angst.

[hippy]

try/ BENZO AWARENESS NETWORK

[hippy]

or  benzo.org

[hippy]

there is a chapter in the book ONE FLEW OVER THE COOKOO'S NEST
where the doctors are watching CHEIF the indian, hes's looking out one of the window's , and he's watching  a bird's nest with  some baby bird's., and the doctor say's to the other doctors look he,s getting better, because he's looking at life out side of him self. when your crazy your eyes almost look totaly inward. when we start tio gain some sanity we start to see the world around us. Sort of like going from total selfcenteredness to a godcenteredness.
I remember when i was married the first time ,my wife took me to these garden's  where the dog woods were in full bloom, looking back i never even noticed them because all i was concerned with was where i was goin to get my fix for that night.
what a shsme looking back. i was so consumed with my self.
I got clean a few years later , and was working on a NA 2nd
step restoration to sanity , I  was driving down the I 95 one day and was looking off into the distance off the side of the road and i noticed a single tree ,it was winter time, the tree was bare ,but it was so beautiful . I was 25 years old then and i finally  noticed one of god's simple creations. I was getting better, just like the cheif.

[Mace]

I have only posted once before and I too vented. I wont go into the whole story but I am losing the use of my legs due to a back injury and am in pain most every min. of every day. I take 3 40mg of oxycontin every day. I have increased from 2 40mg a day but did it over almost 4 years. I have always taken the meds as prescribed and I believe it has saved my life! Before the oxy I took Lortab 10/750. Don’t remember the amount but I do remember that I would have what I call mini w/d about every 5 hours and I felt so bad!! My Dr. told me at the beginning that I MUST take the meds as directed. He has offered me IR oxy for breakthrough pain but I find that I can just take the next dose a little early for bad pain times. But never more than 3 40mg a day. I truly feel that there must be a trust between my Dr. and myself. I have read some horror stories about some uncaring Dr. on this page and I can only hope that they are not the rule but the exception! Don’t misunderstand me I know I am addicted to the opiates I take, and when I read about the brave soles that quit the drug I am amazed at their strength!!one time I missed a flight and ran out of my oxycontin! It was only 48 hours but in a strange town and when I did make my flight I was a wreck! I understand why one of us  addicts  might do almost anything to stop that pain. I believe that oxycontin has saved my life but I understand how some people wish it would never have been developed. I don’t think anyone has the answers for opiate addiction and pain relief. I do believe that the answer may be  a page like this one that lets us vent without fear of being judged, talking to people who understand what we feel, and who other than an other opiate addict could ever really know the pain of opiate withdraw, or any withdraw for that matter?

[angst]

Oxycontin and MS contin  are for chronic pain, terminal pain.  I am a recovering junkie.  I have kicked without medical attention a few times.  The last 3 relapses lead me back to methadone.  Without it, at the time, I probably would have died.  I was so into my addiction.  I do not know when I will get off the methadone this time.  I was on it two years before and had a clean period of 6 months off opiates.  I do not smoke pot or drink, except for the occasional imported treat.  I was in chronic pain and got hooked on stadol ns.  That was a gateway drug into the dirty world of chasing the drug man and getting money anyway I could.  Warm baths and small meals helped me during withdrawls.  I did the gatorade thing.  You do not want to get dehydrated.  If you are coming of opiates, your stomach knots up first.  When the stomach subsides, you hurt all over for a month or so.  I do not mean to be a downer.  This is a great time to get out of yourself.  When you are weak physically, you can be strong spiritually.  I'm not talking about anybody's gospel.  Your own concept will work.  At times, my higher power was kitchen appliances.  Meigan, just hang in there, it does get better.  Angst

[angst]

What is this "recipe" I keep seeing in the other comments?  What does it do and who is it for?  Any info is appreciated.  I am completely ignorant about this "recipe".  thanks

[hippy]

the recipe
L-tyrosine 8 500mg tabs a day week1 ,3 aday week 2
b-6 2 tab a day
cal magnisum
zinc,vit a, vit c, copper, magnese,
Imodium (immodium) for runs.
a strong muliti vitamin.
  .

bannas are good for leg spasams because of the potasium in them.
slim fast has  these ingredents and won't hurt to take either. or any other vit drink.
the l-tyrosine seem to bee the main thing it's an amion acid that gets the endorfins in your brain working agian.
there is more written on the site here and there so read everything.
I have been taking it for two weeks now cold turkey and it,s been a life saver.

[hippy]

i was trying to get off a 15 perc a day  habit for the last year or 2 , i kept trying ,but kept failing  ,because the depression
was to much to handle along with the other withdrawl symptoms.
well i did not want to go to a rehab or a detox.
then i found this site read about the reciep.
i been taking it and it has  worked

[angst]

I wonder if magnesium taken sublingual would help take the edge off my anxiety while tapering off the xanax.  I have to say that all anxiety wears my energy down to nil.  Try explaining that to a straight ex-husband and 11 year-old daughter.  They want a clean house and meals.  i just want to sleep through this somehow.  I can sleep during the day, but at night sleep evades me like the plague.  I read mysteries and watch true crime series.  That does not sound very relaxing.  Sometimes I try to draw, but I am too hyped up to much productive work.  i've got to get out of the house, but I'm terrified at the thought of leaving my haven.  I usually take trazadone at night, but I've been out for a few days.  Tuesday, I'll go to the doc.  I'm a nurse myself, and I get frustrated at their ignorance at times.  Really, it is his wife.  She is trying to detox me, and she does not know what she is doing.  I'll try to fix it Tuesday.  I'm also trying to change my career.  Hope to find a new job soon.
Thanks for the recipe.   Angst

[oh please already]

try calcium and st john wort for sleep_ yearsterday when i went to pick up the recipe i got them and they did give me a few hours sleep last night I got the calicum because all of those infomercials that ive seen for cCALSORB- all those people kept giving testermony on is vurtues so what could it hurt=do check about the st john wort for any drug intractions,I remember reading about some but I cant recall what they were well back to the john for me   see ya all later

[angst]

Sometime life suprises me, although it is tenuous for me.  While washing the dishes, looking out the window at the bayou and porch, I saw a butterfly.  Not just any butterfly, and I am not hallucinating, it's wingspan as large as my hand.  It is blue, gray, white and orange.  It is so huge.  It does not act like a hummingbird moth.  I live in the Southeast USA on the Gulf of Mexico.  This is unusual.  I know most of the indigenous plants and animals, because I've been here all my life.  We have all kinds of huge colorful spiders, but this is something new and beautiful.  I had gone out and in once, without noticing it.  I hope it is well.  Gotta go.  I have more energy and nerves right now.  My mind is screaming more adrenalin, more adrenalin.  I know it will eventually wear itself out of this, but I have little control.  Hope  you get to feeling better.  Imodium (immodium) was listed in that recipe, I hope, at least when you go out.  Angst

[OxyDout]

The fact is yes, they are the ones responsible for monitoring drugs, which is what they try and do, however, its you that is abusing his prescription, therefor, he is not at fault........ I'm in the same situation, however, I never admitted to my doc that I was an addict.........

GWH

[angst]

I tell all my physicians and dentist that I am a recovering addict on methadone.  I do not get the benefit of as much medication for pain following a surgery.  I have to tough out the headaches.  That is how I got hooked in the first place.  I had a happy neurologist who prescribed 6 bottles of stadol ns a week for me.  Thanks Doc!  I have an internist who takes care of my asthma.  He keeps me in xanax for now.  No one else will touch me.  Especially in Mississippi.  I have to go to alabama for methadone and to see the internist.  The ER is a good place to go in withdrawl for a few benzo's or something to help through the worst of it.  At least here, the hospitals are not so large.  I do not agree with the way the doctors discriminate against me because i'm a recoving addict on methadone.  But not everyone is enlightened.  They are afraid of the licensure boards.  I hope you are feeling better.

[oh please already]

well heres my babble  your right I was the one who took extra not the doctor but doctors should be informed on side effects and limitations of medication.If were a anti depressant we were talking about the doctor who of been sympthtic to the signs of withdrawl and supported it.I also question why so many people on this board think there addicts when they have REAL medical conditions that require pain control for qualty of life.Why are people made to feel guilty when its a chemical fact that tolerance will devolop even if taken as precribed.I understand people like mrmichael who so strongly defend oxycotin,in his case he has cerebl palsy and i wouldnt wish that on a dog,he found something that gives him life back and its not fair that he has to worry that it will be discontuined because of people like who abuse it.And then there are people like me also having real pain issues,I have stills,, aform of Reumotoid arthrisis that is harding all my conective tissue,blood vessals,skin,lungs etc,it hurts somedays worse theni ever thought possable and some days not,Why am i wrong in telling my doctor i cant tolerate the oxy,that i want to see what its like without it,its been four years and im in a good remission so its a good time,so why should i suffer,how humane is it ,what lesson am i begin taught? When the stills was full blow I SHOULD OF HAD 200mg if thats what i needed,i shouldnt of had to sneak no one should .Narcotics are a good drug,giving good pain control with limited and treatable side effects,threre are people who will always take every thing to the limit but how many on this forum know that they can take one drug without that need to self medicate ans then theres that one you just cant control,shouldnt you be able to be honest with your doctor and not judged?I truly belive that most addicts like us would not be if when we had pain it was adressed,then we wouldnt of thougght to self medicate,we would of healed and moved on,no one should suffer and noone has the right to judge what is real to themselfs,I would never punish my 4 yr old for having a nightmare,its real to her and i dont think anyone should be punsihed for getting caught in one either There is nothing wrong with needing help.,Doctors have the oblgation when they treat a person not to judge,whould they taunght a 400 ld diabetic?not to their face ,it   would be thought ill off to make fun or torment them,everyone fucks up somehow,would you punsih the person who lost his leg because he was speeding by making him hop or crawl,of course not. ,if you did youd be an ass.sSO why are addicts who are asking for help out of a pit that a lot of time they didnt dig alone,I  can understand if their not trying to help themselfs,or worse hurting others but why torment someone who is looking for a hand up,not a hand out?

[angst]

Don't be so hard on yourself.  You were in pain, and if like me when I had vascular headaches, scared of the worsening pain.  I also doctor shopped.  When I was on stadol ns.  I would do anything to keep my supply.  I thought it was okay because my neurologist said it was okay to use as much as I needed.  I have little experience with oxy's.  Most of my junkie friends (ex-friends) shoot them.  I know they work like MSContin.  There is also oxy ir  for immediate pain.  No doctor should cut off a patient.  You could die from withdrawls.  I have seen doctors ridicule heavy diabetics.  I also had an acquaintance with multiple back surgeries, same m.d.  He cut this guy off of pain meds even though the guy had chronic pain.  the guy was admitted for an abscess in his gluteal muscle from giving himself inj of street drugs.  He was finally shown by another junkie how to shoot up.  He went to jail.  He got out and went back to using.  He got caught with a couple of parole violations and did not want to go back to jail.  They found him in a bath tub in a hotel with his rig in his arm, dead.  I can blame the medical field for partially causing his jail time and death.  It scares me.  I am just as addicted as he was.  If it weren't for the methadone and xanax, I'd be chasing the dope man myself.  I am strong today.  I hope I would try to get help first.  It is a progressive, fatal disease we all live with.  It is nothing to play with or romaticize.  I'm just venting.  All of us got here one way or another.  I just pray I do not end up like my acquaintance.

[oh please already]

be strong-and make lots af butterfly wishes ((((((U))))))) :)laura

[angst]

Thanks.  It is getting into the evening here.  Time to water plants, feed pets, and cook supper.  My kid came home today swearing she will not go back to her school.  She's in the fifth grade.  Someone started a rumor and she got blamed.  Now she is freaking out.  When they are young, something like that really works them up.  It is easy for me to stay calm and want to protect her.  It is not easy when someone wants to mess with my medications.  I get all worked up.  I hope everyone gets some rest tonight.  I'm worried about seeing the doctor tomorrow.  I want to take someone with me.  I'll probably go alone.  I have to get this straight about my xanax before his nurse has me out hunting xanax.  It will keep me up of a while.  Sometimes, I wish I had more faith.  I cannot seem to grasp the concept that everything is alright.  Angst is with me, more than my nickname.
this acute consciousness is a strange way to live.

[pippi]

Is your wife the natural mother of your son?  ADD is a genetic neurological disorder, and if unrecognized and treated can lead to addiction and more.  Could your wife have ADD?  Has she ever been tested?  My 74yr.old grandma takes 20mg of adderrall.  My neurologist has me on 80mg a day,and since being properly diagnosed, and medicated I quit drinking cold turkey,smoking ciggerettes(after 12 yrs.) cold turkey, and no longer do any drugs. If you still don't like the med.idea there is a med. alternative to ADD now.  It's called neuro-feedback training.  It uses computer games and other tools to train theta waves to produce when you need them, as well as beta waves. Maybe that would get the adderrall out of your house completely.  As far as her depression;  those anti-depressants are the med. I would worry about most!!!!  Pharmacutical websites define anti-dep. as a chemical induced happiness.  A pill to help you enjoy your boredom. They're a crock of caca!!   Depression is caused by a repression of somekind.  She's repressing something. Happiness is a choice!!  In order to achieve natural true happiness, she needs to realize life is too short, & fear is a 4 letter word.  I learned the hard way that the only way to live is to have the balls to LIVE!!!   My motto in life is,"This is my movie,if you don't like the direction,exit stage left...

[GOD]

Hey, good post!


What you said about fear is SOOOOO true.

Most of us are afraid of die...
Some of us are afraid to LIVE.. THAT one is the one that gets us REALLY down. It took me a LONG time to realize that i was afraid to LIVE. You feel sooooo much better when you can look that particular fear down and stomp it into oblivion!

Keep up the good postings!
Jess

[angst]

My daughter has been in therapy three times, because of my addiction.  Once the psychiatrist wanted to put her on an SSRI, and my ex-husband and I said no way.  She is too young for anyone to be messing with her brain chemistry.  I do not care how good the drug is.  She is much better today.  Depression is often situational instead of chemical.  There are bipolars who need these meds.  My child just is not one of them.

[Willhead]

I have a question, my husband is a herion addict and has been diagnosed with ADHD and is taking Adderral and is abusing it.  My question is can he overdose on this medication and can he inject it with a needle?? I am very concerned about him and what could happen?
Thanks Willhead

[angst]

If your husband is addicted to heroin, and now taking adderall (adderrall), then he is what we always called speed balling.  The herion gives the euphoric, relaxed, and all is right feelings.  Add the speed and it increases his heroin effects and alters them into being able to get off the couch.  I do not have a lot of experience here.  I am a nurse who surrendered her license. Now, I'm speaking of myself in 3rd person, uh oh.  Anyway, it is not a good mixture.  If he is a heroin addict, the diagnosis is probably bogus.  The side effects of heroin could mimic the symptoms of adult ADD.
Good  Luck  -   I think you and your husband will need it.

[rowanshyne]

Pippi wrote:

Pharmacutical websites define anti-dep. as a chemical induced happiness. A pill to help you enjoy your boredom. They're a crock of caca!! Depression is caused by a repression of somekind.


This is *not* necessarily true.  I don't want to get into an argument about it; no fights, please.  I have clinical depression.  I am *not* bored.  I'm am *not* repressing anything.  I *do* have a chemical imbalance of the brain.  


Wren

[hanky]

i've been taking adderall (adderrall) for only 6 weeks (30 mg/day) and i feel a significant difference when i try to skip just one day.  i'm irritable, tired and can't concentrate.  do people ever get off of this?  am i on it for life?

[Hinkster]

Post right up near the top, your eighteen threads down noone will
will see you down here. I don't even know what adderall (adderrall) is.

[pippi]

I don't doubt for a second that you have a chemical imbalance in your brain due to depression.  When you get depressed your brain chemistry is going to change. It changes when you're happy too.  Emotions cause the chemical change.  You may not realize the reason yet, but my dear no one is naturally depressed.  I got all my info from the zoloft web site.  Their the ones who call it a chemical induced happiness.  The truth is though. Simply, life is what you make it.  If you believe you can't be genuinly happy,because god didn't make you that way,then all I can do is pray for you.  And hopfully you'll realize you cause your own unhappiness.  no one is willing to take responsibility for any thing anymore,pop a pill and be happy.  Do you ever just thank god you're alive, or that you're not starving in some disease infested third world country?  Do you ever feel lucky you have clean water to drink? Maybe you just need to realize what blessings you have,and quit blaming chemistry you created for your outlook.  Happiness is a choice.  Choose to be happy, and try looking at the bright side.  I should know I've been beaten molested raped abused in every way used addicted to many substances,and quit.  Hell and back, but that's ok and I blame no one and forgave everyone because I choose to not let those things determine who I am.  I choose to be happy.  sorry, this is a subject I get passionate about.  I've been on every anti-depressant on the market for "clinical depression" &hospitialized for it,  until I realized what was causing it.  For me it was all the anger and hate in my heart.  What cured me was the willingness to forgive and let go.  Life is short you really could die tomorrow, do you really want to look back at the short time we have here and only see depression?  go to your local arborietum and smell the flowers.

[rowanshyne]

I appreciate your *opinion*.  I appreciate the fact that you believe you are helping me with your information. Until you have walked in my shoes, don't define me, please.
Yes, I am thankful for the blessings which abound around me.  I had a lovely upbringing, was well educated, was not harmed, was not "bored".  Until diagnosed with depression, however, I was unbearably sad .............  sorry, I don't need to explain my life to you.
I am content with it.

Thank you for your input.
Wren

[groovygirl]

i'm sure you mean well, but any info gathered at the zoloft website is probably going to be based on convincing people to try antidepressants. when you say no one is "naturally depressed," i'm not sure what you mean by that...depression is hereditary in which case it would mean that a person's emotions really have nothing to do with a chemical imbalance created.

as i've mentioned before, we are not dr.s....some may not value a professional's opinion, but this is exactly the type of situation where again, one person is trying to diagnose another person. although we may share the disease of addiction, we are all different.  let's just be here to support...

[advice from an addict]

I was an addict of oxys and i a not any more so all you listen up
The trick is a step process. You need to try new things just not painkillers. what i did is started smoking weed first then starte some adderal. these helped me get my mind off of oxys. then i tried some other things lie nitrous oxide and others then fnnally ended on alcohol. also fill you time with things to help you keep your mindoff addiction. Some people might not agree with this but it worked for me.
also throw away all painkillers so you wont be tempted.


And for theguy who is worried about his wife, 20mg is nothing unless she is snorting it. there shouln't be any withdraw symtems. what i would do is give her some thing to do during the day be cause alot of addictions are caused by bordum and having easy access to the drug. but then again you are not me so do what you want.

[JumpingJoe]

I have major concerns about the drug Adderall (adderrall). My dog has been taking my son's Adderall (adderrall) for some time now. He's crapping all over the carpet unlike before, he use to go to the door and wait til we let him out. He hacked into my computer last week and deleted my system files, thats when I knew there was a drug problem (who would do such a thing if not on drugs?). Please give me any suggestions regarding this problem, he is a vicious dog - pitt bull, and its hard to take anything away from him without risking your arm or limb. Thank you.

[JumpingJoe]

I have major concerns about the drug Adderall (adderrall). My dog has been taking my son's Adderall (adderrall) for some time now. He's crapping all over the carpet unlike before, he use to go to the door and wait til we let him out. He hacked into my computer last week and deleted my system files, thats when I knew there was a drug problem (who would do such a thing if not on drugs?). Please give me any suggestions regarding this problem, he is a vicious dog - pitt bull, and its hard to take anything away from him without risking your arm or limb. Thank you.

[NeedHelp92]

I have been taking adderall (adderrall)-redylan (sp)  not long just for the past about two months. 30 mg. without a prescription. I tried to do vyvanse at 70 mg again without a pres. but that was just once and i was light headed. i am going to stick with the adderall (adderrall) but it makes me better at school, gymnastics, everything i try. I like it a lot. and also it makes me not eat, which is just a plus to loose some weight i am only 16 years old and can't tell my parents because like i said it is not a perscription, they would flip out. I even went up a level in gymnatics, started getting better grades in school and i feel like my whole life is finally coming together nicely. but after reading this and other web sites on this is scares me. I have been doing it about 4 days a week. whenever i go to gymnastics. and i do not have a clue what to do anymore because i would like to stay on it but the after effect scares me a lot (like in the long run) I kind of dont want to stop but i feel it can definitly become a problem in the future. My coaches say how good i have been and how much better not only i am as a gymnast but my attitude is and every little thing about me. but obviously they dont know what i have been doing. and also i am spending a lot of money that i do not have to spend. Please do not respond to me if you are going to mis-treat me i want help not someone telling me how bad it is for me. what do you think i should do. Since you all have been in my shoes before.