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Bad news shot my day!

by Missy31, Apr 16, 2008 01:23PM
Well got some bad news today my father has been DX with lung cancer for the second time, he had lung cancer in 1998 had surgery and recovered but went today and has cancer again on both lungs. The dr says that surgery isn't an option and that they are going to run a whole bunch of test and make sure it hasn't spread to other parts of his body. the doctor also wrote him a RX for Oxycotin which for those of you might remember my father is a big time pill abuser and I'm not sure how this will turn out. My mom says she is going to stay in control of them but even when she does he usually seems to get his pills and always takes more then he is supposed too. So I'm just worried about my father and all the stress this is putting on my mother I am 12 hours away from them so all I can do is be encouraging over the phone but its just scary situation. Just needed to vent thanks for listening! Luv Yall ( I truely think abusing and addiction is genetic cause I think I got my abusing habits from my father)Anyone think theres any truth to that?
Member Comments (12)

by mommy52713, Apr 16, 2008 01:28PM
yes i think that there is alot of truth to that both my parents abused alcohol. i am so sorry to here about your father i will pray 4 him and your family♥holly

by Jacqui805, Apr 16, 2008 01:31PM
To: Missy
Kids of users are way more predisposed to use and there has been research to show a genetic component to at least alcohol use...so probably pills too.  I'm so sorry about your father, and all of the stress that's on you right now.  I wish there was something I could say to help, but I don't think I can pull that one off.  We're here to support you though, however we can.

by dove3053, Apr 16, 2008 01:33PM
To: Missy
I think it's genetic too and I got it from my Mother. She would love to hear that, but it's true. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I know it was hard for me when my Dad had cancer for a second time and I'm about 9 hours away.

Dove

by kim715, Apr 16, 2008 01:35PM
I'm so sorry to hear about your bad news.My prayers are with your family.And to your question I do believe addiction could be a learned behavior from childhood to some degree.My dad was an alcoholic.I know that when it comes down to it it's a choice,but perhaps growing up in that atmosphere plays some part in the choices we make.

by Firefaery1023, Apr 16, 2008 01:36PM
To: Missy
Just wanted to let you know that I feel for you.  I understand your worry.  If he takes all his pills before he is due for a refill have you mom just let him have withdrawals.  He will learn what he can do.  
Lots of Love Sweetie,
Fire

by troubleinohio, Apr 16, 2008 01:39PM
Missy Im sorry to hear about your dad's cancer coming back. Its unbelievable how prevelant cancer still is in this day and age and I pray all the time that they find the cure soon. We have lost alot of relatives to it, including my husbands dad. Who by the way was the most loving, compassionate, wise, sweet man you could have ever met. Its so hard to believe that my husband came from this man because he is so opposite, lol. (however my husbands mom was a real piece of work- and thats where he got all his bad genes).  Anyways, yes addiction is genetic, for sure.  My dad was a severe alcoholic and thats what killed him when he was 59. He died when I was 18, drank himself to death slowly all those years.
I will keep your family in my thoughts and prayers.

by Missy31, Apr 16, 2008 01:40PM
Thanks to everyone I appreciate all your thoughts and prayer, with them we'll make it threw! As the saying what don't kill ya will make ya stronger!

by cathy5841, Apr 16, 2008 02:17PM
missy, so sorry about your dad.  you will be in my prayers.  i cant say my addiction was handed down.  neither of my parents have ever had any kind of addiction.  neither has ever had a drink or taken any pain meds.  i wish i could blame them lol.  it was just choices i made.  
love
cathy

by Chi_Chi_Lover, Apr 16, 2008 02:44PM
Sorry to hear about your dad. My mother had lung, liver and kidney cancer. I know this is a tough time for you. I've been through it and living a distance away from her was very hard.

by leann357, Apr 20, 2008 07:25PM
To: missy31
I am so sorry for you and your dad. My dad passed a couple of years ago, it is still hard. My mom died of lung cancer when I was 15. My dad drank most of his life, when he was dying the drs made sure he had plenty of painkillers but he did not want to take them. He said he did not like the way he felt when he took pills. When it got to the point of morphine injections, he would fight the sleep. The nurse on the oncology floor where my dad was said alot of patients fight the sleep, they are afraid they will go to sleep and not wake up. I believe addiction is inheireted(sp). I have had some issues of my own. I can relate to what you are going through, it does get better. Time does not heal all wounds, It makes the wounds more bearable.

by worried878, Apr 20, 2008 09:41PM
To: missy
I am sorry to hear about this....i am glad u are there for him...i do think pill usage/addiction is hereditary to soem degree like alcoholism...my parents dont drink or use so i have no excuse...come from clean genes so it is not always the case but does seem to be a connection there...u r in my prayers

by sue41, Apr 20, 2008 10:04PM
To: Missy
Sorry to hear about your dad.  I lost my dad on January 1st of this year.  It was especially hard for me because he had a stroke when I was just 4 and I grew up with him always being home and being totally involved in my life.  I still have days I think that I can't go on, but I know that he is in a better place and that he did not suffer.  He was a strong man.  He was shot through the stomach by his tent mate in the army, then he had a massive stroke at age 46 that put him in a wheelchair, and then he had cancer in one of his kidneys and had it removed.  I find it remarkable that he came through all of these trials and lived 15 years after the last surgery and died of old age and with his mind in tack.

Cherish the time you have with him and make as many memories as you can!
I will be praying for you both,
Sue
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