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Birthing a child while being an addict in recovery...
So....just as it appears..I'm pregnant. I do have some time to prepare for "go time" but I'm scared to death of birthing this child and knowing that afterwards I have to refuse the pain meds....
The truth is, I can't take them, or I'll be right back on the rollercoaster...I'm just afraid. I have a daughter and I had her vaginally. I had two shots of demerol and then finally an epidural. The hospital that I will be going to was great to me with my daughter. The anesthesiologist was great, I put my own legs in the sturrips....I could feel a lot. Not one of those deals when you couldn't feel anything to push.( Now, this would be the time for those of you that are not comfortable taking about all of the harsh realities of labor and delivery to exit...) I just know that my baby was only 6 pounds and I had 4th degree tears....YIKES!! My doc. sewed me up for over an hour....So, what now??? I remember even when the baby was 2 weeks old, I was walking through Walmart thinking, "if I could just sit down, my crotch won't feel like it's falling off...." then I'd sit down...then I'd think to myself..."if I could just stand up I'd feel better.." and that was on percs....
Basically, I said all of that to say....I can do broken bones...I've had tons of them...I can do pain....but, I found it very hard to function after childbirth with all of the things going against me...
I want to do this....I need to do this,....I HAVE to do this....
If any of you have any suggestions, please.....I'm all ears!!!
The truth is, I can't take them, or I'll be right back on the rollercoaster...I'm just afraid. I have a daughter and I had her vaginally. I had two shots of demerol and then finally an epidural. The hospital that I will be going to was great to me with my daughter. The anesthesiologist was great, I put my own legs in the sturrips....I could feel a lot. Not one of those deals when you couldn't feel anything to push.( Now, this would be the time for those of you that are not comfortable taking about all of the harsh realities of labor and delivery to exit...) I just know that my baby was only 6 pounds and I had 4th degree tears....YIKES!! My doc. sewed me up for over an hour....So, what now??? I remember even when the baby was 2 weeks old, I was walking through Walmart thinking, "if I could just sit down, my crotch won't feel like it's falling off...." then I'd sit down...then I'd think to myself..."if I could just stand up I'd feel better.." and that was on percs....
Basically, I said all of that to say....I can do broken bones...I've had tons of them...I can do pain....but, I found it very hard to function after childbirth with all of the things going against me...
I want to do this....I need to do this,....I HAVE to do this....
If any of you have any suggestions, please.....I'm all ears!!!
my first baby they cut me. it healed nicely. the second, they lemme tear and it hurt like h e l l ! Maybe you could ask them to cut you? Much better (IMO) than tearing.
another thing I just thought of...maybe your tearing won't be as bad since it's your second birth?
yep 4th degree is the worst
and btw, Ive had both a C sect and a VBAC.
My C section was with my first son (4.5 years), had an emergency section after a long hard labor. That was a VERY painful recovery and I had alot of problems post operatively.
The VBAC with my second son (2.5 years) was better to recover from even though it was the above mentioned 4th degree tear. Id definitely want the vaginal route again vs. the C sect if I ever were to have a third child.
All this being said, I know alot of moms who have had C sections and breezed through recovery with NO pain meds and were out shopping 3 days later. It all just depends on the person and their body really. I wasnt even an addict back when I had either child, but I still needed narcotics to get through my post partum pains.
and btw, Ive had both a C sect and a VBAC.
My C section was with my first son (4.5 years), had an emergency section after a long hard labor. That was a VERY painful recovery and I had alot of problems post operatively.
The VBAC with my second son (2.5 years) was better to recover from even though it was the above mentioned 4th degree tear. Id definitely want the vaginal route again vs. the C sect if I ever were to have a third child.
All this being said, I know alot of moms who have had C sections and breezed through recovery with NO pain meds and were out shopping 3 days later. It all just depends on the person and their body really. I wasnt even an addict back when I had either child, but I still needed narcotics to get through my post partum pains.
Fourth degree is the worst tear, it's right through the rectum...OUCH!!! If you get a headache after an epidural it's most likely due to a "wet tap" Anesthesiologist went to far in past the epidural space and cerebrospinal fluid leaked out.....terrible headeache! They give you caffeine to alleviate the headache! Not fun!
c-section is defintely worse. Our bodies are made to deliver babies and a cut "down there" is way better than a huge cut in your gutt. You can't move, walk, laugh or drive for a long time after. But anyway, you'll be fine sweety. You've had an epidural before so you know how much they help. If you had headaches afterward, someone wasn't doing something right. My mom had the same thing and it was because they went too far up the spine.
4 months! That's so exciting. You should feel it kicking soon if you haven't already.
4 months! That's so exciting. You should feel it kicking soon if you haven't already.
I'm almost positive that a fourth degree tear is the worst....I don't remember ever hearing of a fifth degree and honestly I can't imagine what would be worse that splitting from front to back...(that was to see just how sqeemish you are....just kiddin'..) BUT, I very well may be wrong....
Is 4th degree the worst tear... yeah, I thought I wasn't sqeemish until I read those posts, now I'm having trouble typing.
my mom got migraines after a spinal with me. it wasnt an epi back then just a saddle block? i think its called? C-sections definitely take longer to heal since they cut thru muscle and stuff. Im so grateful Ive never had to have one. But I know lots who have.
Of course an epidural or a spinal block is always an option. I unfortunately had some serious side affects because of the epidural....I developed migraine headaches after my spine was messed with...now I realize that the last comment may cause some controversy... but, that was my own experience...however, a woman in labor will cheat, steal and lie to get out of that kind of pain..so, time will only tell!!
Isn't c-section painful afterwards in the healing process? My brother's wife had one and she seemed to be in a lot of...discomfort afterwards. What about a nerve black at the spine? I think that's what I'D do!!! :)
and....I'm and idiot..as I was saying....and everyone knows I'm preg....and I haven't gained any weight and I'm still wearing my old clothes....so the old timers think that I'm abusing the child...I"m like......"I promise you, I'll more than make up for it later..." unsolicited advice KILLS me!!!!
Also,...this is actually my 5th child but I miscarried the other three....those were hard times...My daughter was a twin and I lost that one also.....such as life...
Thank you all for the encouragement.....
Also,...this is actually my 5th child but I miscarried the other three....those were hard times...My daughter was a twin and I lost that one also.....such as life...
Thank you all for the encouragement.....
So, I have made a plan to go in and try to tolerate the contractions and then to get a pudendal block. Most of you know what that is but for those of you that don't it is a local anesthetic that is injected into the pudendal nerve which is the main nerve in the pelvis. It basically keeps you from feeling the tearing or the episiotomy and the crowning. Sounds like a good plan to me....after the baby is born, I'll probably stay in the hospital just a day longer to heal a bit more rather than taking the meds...That is definetely an options. Here in Ga, all insurances are supposed to allow 3 days from delivery for a vaginal delivery and 4 days for a c-section.
Fladdict...I almost agree with you on the c-section however, when they cut you open they cut through skin, fat, muscle, and the your uterus....I just think that keeping things un-cut internally would make for a shorter recovery....but, I don't know what I'm talking about seeing as how I've never had one...
Hillary...yes, ma'am....this is my second child. I am only four months along...speaking of that .....I live in a small town and
Fladdict...I almost agree with you on the c-section however, when they cut you open they cut through skin, fat, muscle, and the your uterus....I just think that keeping things un-cut internally would make for a shorter recovery....but, I don't know what I'm talking about seeing as how I've never had one...
Hillary...yes, ma'am....this is my second child. I am only four months along...speaking of that .....I live in a small town and
Take the epidural. There are plenty of meds they can give you afterwards that will help with the pain but aren't addicting. I think your real fear is that this is going to be a huge test of your recovery. Tell everyone NOW that you do not want meds. This will keep you strong during a weak moment. Make sure your husband/boyfriend knows you are serious and to not let you manipulate him later into taking meds. There is no reason to take narcotics with all the other options. I'm afraid that even if you only take meds in the hospital it will screw with your head and the depression will start all over while you're dealing with the stress and hormone issues of a new baby.
As a side note - I had surgery in July and before that I was clean for a week. I just knew I was going to get the meds and even though I didn't really need them I pretended I did. Then I kept on getting refills because of the "pain". That's what eventually led me to get on suboxone because it was obvious that I was out of control.
I will be thinking of you. I know you can do it!!!!!!!! Stay strong and keep in touch on here. Just keep remembering how far you've come and how much joy that baby will bring.
As a side note - I had surgery in July and before that I was clean for a week. I just knew I was going to get the meds and even though I didn't really need them I pretended I did. Then I kept on getting refills because of the "pain". That's what eventually led me to get on suboxone because it was obvious that I was out of control.
I will be thinking of you. I know you can do it!!!!!!!! Stay strong and keep in touch on here. Just keep remembering how far you've come and how much joy that baby will bring.
reading all these stories... makes me vote for C section... I don't want kids but if i ever change my mind nothing is ripping me apart.. LOL I am a tiny person so I can't even imagine..I would rather be surgically cut open then ripped open but thats just me..LOL
hey there .. i had my first by c-section back in 89, god aweful pain .. i remember being hooked on to the morphine machine .. that was way before my addiction problems .. fast forward to june 2003, my daughter was born vaginally - omg! the PAIN was INTENSE!!!! i also tore and it took forever to be sewn back up .. i thought to myself there is no way in hell that i'm going to that again .. for 8wks i coudn't sit .. had to sit on one of those rings - took my little ring w/my everywhere, it did help somewhat .. then i got pregnant again, my kids are 14 mos apart - had him vaginally, no problems at all!!!! i thought for sure i was going to be in so much pain & not be able to sit - everything was still numb down there and didn't feel a darn thing afterwards .. i wz up right after i had him, able to walk and sit w/no problems ..
Is this your 2nd child? usually after your first vaginal birth it tends not be so hard on you down under .. lol ... good luck to you ... how far along are you? i've been wanting to have another one - everytime i see a new baby i just remember back when mine were that little .. they are sooo sweet and precious...my youngest just turned 3 - but i'm done .. husband had to get fixed .. we'd bump into each other in the hall and i'd get pregnant .. i even had a miscarriage in between those two .. have a good one! peace!!
Is this your 2nd child? usually after your first vaginal birth it tends not be so hard on you down under .. lol ... good luck to you ... how far along are you? i've been wanting to have another one - everytime i see a new baby i just remember back when mine were that little .. they are sooo sweet and precious...my youngest just turned 3 - but i'm done .. husband had to get fixed .. we'd bump into each other in the hall and i'd get pregnant .. i even had a miscarriage in between those two .. have a good one! peace!!
if i were you i would just wait and see..Every delivery is different..My first was so hard, and my last was with no meds at all, except for a few hydros after. but no epidural ( she came too fast) almost had her in the car...but she was the least painfull..I don't know why...If i were you I would go in try your best, but no addict deserves to suffer..plain and simple..
For my first i tore and i know wht you mean, I really didn't even want to hold her for 2 weeks, i hurt so bad..They say once you tear you will probably tear for the second..Well i did not..SO don't think you will again..Think positive..And if you have to use them, use them short term, be honest with your doctor, that way he won't give you more then you need like they always do...Let someone give them to you...BUT don't let yourself suffer, how will you take care of that beautifull baby?
R2R
For my first i tore and i know wht you mean, I really didn't even want to hold her for 2 weeks, i hurt so bad..They say once you tear you will probably tear for the second..Well i did not..SO don't think you will again..Think positive..And if you have to use them, use them short term, be honest with your doctor, that way he won't give you more then you need like they always do...Let someone give them to you...BUT don't let yourself suffer, how will you take care of that beautifull baby?
R2R
ouch...
i think you need to discuss your fears with your doctor. is he the same doctor that delivered your other child?
my pelvis is too little to deliver even a 5 pound baby...so since i have four sons (the largest weighed in at 9 pounds 11 oz.)...i have had four c-sections. sounds like maybe you should have had one too. apparently this is easier to get over than what you went through. everyone i know who has had a c-section was up and about in 3-5 days. after day two...tylenol xs did the trick.
i know it doesn't make things better...but try not to worry about the "what ifs". talk to your doctor and be honest with him about everything.
good luck
kim
i think you need to discuss your fears with your doctor. is he the same doctor that delivered your other child?
my pelvis is too little to deliver even a 5 pound baby...so since i have four sons (the largest weighed in at 9 pounds 11 oz.)...i have had four c-sections. sounds like maybe you should have had one too. apparently this is easier to get over than what you went through. everyone i know who has had a c-section was up and about in 3-5 days. after day two...tylenol xs did the trick.
i know it doesn't make things better...but try not to worry about the "what ifs". talk to your doctor and be honest with him about everything.
good luck
kim
Hi, you really don't need narcotics for childbirth unless you are a c-section...I had four kids vaginally and tore each time. I was really sore but with the help of topicals (witch hazel pads/ hydrocortisone cream), ibuprofen and a sitz bath (my VERY BEST friend in the whole word post delivery), I was able to get through this. Get an epidural if you need to, not narcotic, just a regional anesthetic. Lidocaine is used for any repairs of your "crotch". The MD may offer Percocet or an IV dose of Nubain, but being an addict, you know where that will lead us. It really CAN be done without narcotics! I speak from experience from being on both sides of childbirth. Being an L&D RN I have seen some really nasty lacerations and people can deal without narcotics. This is a joyous time and you shouldn't be stressing over the drugs, look at the gift you have been given and enjoy this time!
Peace.
Peace.
Now I remember why I never had children. OMG..you poor thing. I don't know what to say.....
(also a comment for squeamish men not to read below, lol)
I also had a 4th degree tear when i had my 2.5 year old! I remember being sewn up for a very long time too afterwards! I almost needed surgery to correct the tear because it was to (but not totally through to) the anus. It was a very difficult painful recovery for sure! Once I was home, I remember just crouching down on the floor to change his diaper would bring me to tears from the pain it caused (I didnt have a changing table so I could remain standing to do it!) I was on vicodin for the pain and it didnt even help that much. Time was the only thing in my favor then.
Wishing you the best of luck
I also had a 4th degree tear when i had my 2.5 year old! I remember being sewn up for a very long time too afterwards! I almost needed surgery to correct the tear because it was to (but not totally through to) the anus. It was a very difficult painful recovery for sure! Once I was home, I remember just crouching down on the floor to change his diaper would bring me to tears from the pain it caused (I didnt have a changing table so I could remain standing to do it!) I was on vicodin for the pain and it didnt even help that much. Time was the only thing in my favor then.
Wishing you the best of luck
When I had my 8 yr old I was offered an RX of 50 vicodins. The only reason I didnt take them was because I didnt have the money for the RX. Silly to me now cuz I woulda done anything to get that money. But really, I was fine pain wise. Just tell them going in youre in recovery and not to offer you anything to take home. BTW, I had my first child naturally with no drugs. It can be done. You Can Di it!!! Get that epidural for the pain and all will be fine. I had one with my daughter and it was wonderful. Dont wait til the last minute to get it tho or youll be begging for pain meds. I got my epi after my 2nd contraction and I had 9 pound babies vaginally.
xoxoxox
alley
xoxoxox
alley
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