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Can recovery from addiction become an addiction?

Can recovery from addiction become an addiction? I feel as though I am consuming myself with trying to recover?
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I have searched for the Thomas recipe & cant find it-can anyone give suggetsions in supplements to help w/ withdraw of Ultram==its bad
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Hey, Linda! 12 days - that's great! I'm doing well, and at Day 26 today. Getting ready to go to NA/AA meeting in a moment. Looking forward to a warmer, sunny Sunday here in Atlanta - hope you're here to enjoy it. Take care, my friend! Lay-ta ....
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Good morning. I'm sorry i didn't post yesterday, I was not near a computer. Today is day12. It seems to be getting alot easier. I really hope all is well for the both of you. Let me know your doing fine (or not.) I care either way.

be safe
linda
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Thank you,  I don't mean this in a bad way.  I just feel so much better knowing that I am not alone in this battle.  Congrats on 10 days.  Can't wait until I'm there.  It's so hard looking at my kids (i have 3 girls ages 3,6, and 8.  Sometimes I think if I didn't have my girls I would have given up a long time ago.  They keep me going and this last week when I really decided that I wanted to quit It was my kid's that made me see that they need their mommy back.  The real one, not the one with moods spings like there is no tomorrow.  I have not quit yet,  but I have made up my mind that I am going too.  I made it two days,  went to the doc to get my antidepressant filled and he also filled my lortab script.  I should have thrown it away,  but I am an addict.   I did get my antidepressants filled,  haven't taken them in 6 months.  Started takeing them again today,  and vow not to get off of them.  I know that they will help me from the depression that comes with w/d's.  I wish you and your little boy the best of luck.   And you the best of luck staying clean.  I hope that I can be as strong as so many people on this sight.  

Goodbye for now
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BLUE, 10 days now? That's GREAT! I'm really proud of you. It good to know you're still getting on with it & getting your life back. I'm at day 25 off hydros & feeling great.
Hugs -M

4mygirls, I know where you are with this nightmare addiction - been there too! Now, I did what you are doing with stopping the pills & feeling like **** for a couple of days then getting more pills and the "relief" from withdrawal hell for a few days, then got disgusted and would decide to stop again & the cycle would go on ... I created a living, drawnnnnn-out hell for myself. I finally got so sick of this on/off mess & started reading the posts at this forum. I swallowed the last pill on Sunday morning, Jan 5th & stuck it out. Now, the big kick in the a** for me was to realize that had I just stayed off initally and rode out the withdrawal for more than 2-3 days, I could have avoided ALOT of physical & emotional suffering. All I'm saying is this: you have to decide when to pull the brake and get off the roller-coaster & just decide for one day at a time that you won't take a pill (sometimes this starts hour by hour - well, it did for me) Take some time off & take lots of hot baths and in a short week (it will seem like a week of eternity at times - I won't lie) you'll be thru it and then just have to stay clean, day by day, but feeling better every day that you're clean from the hydro-hell.
Keep posting ...we're all here to help you & each other.
Hugs -M
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I completely hear and understand what you are saying. I am a single mother of a 3 yr old boy. I am 10 days clean from a oxycontin and vicodin addiction. I felt such guilt when i would be investing sooo much of my time in my habit, wether that was finding pills, finding doctors, being high, being sick etc. and NOT enough time with my son. When I decided enough was enough a huge weight was lifted. I detoxed cold turkey and it has not been easy. But I already notice a difference. My patience level with my son is much greater. The joy i get from seeing him and listening to him and holding him is so much more now that i'm not "zoned" out. If there is anything I can do, let me know.

be safe
linda
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Hello everyone,  I have been reading this forum for about 2 weeks now.  I realized about a month ago that I am addicted to Hydro.  I depend on it.  And days like today,  Two days without it.  I feel like ****,  and still part of my mind tells me that I don't want or need it anymore.  And the other part is telling run to the Doctor now.  I never in my life thought I would get addicted to painpills (I fooled myself).  Anyway,  when I realized that I had a problem,  I take about 8-12 Lortab 10's in a 24 hour period.  Realizeing I had a problem scared me so bad.  I have three little girls that I need to take care of and they need me.  But what scares me the most is that in may of 2002 I had and Aunt pass away from oxy And some other drugs she had taken.  But I do know the main drug was OXY.  I have taken OXY once I found out what it was and heard so many stories about it I have never touched it again.  But the Lortab is bad enough,  you get a tolerance to that and you move to something stronger.  I need help and a whole lot of prayers to get me through this.  I ask God everyday to hold my handand lead me through life the right way.  I guess somewhere down that road of life I let go of his hand.  But I have my grasp on it now and I don't ever want to let go again.  I need to get clean for my girls but most of all for me.
         Thank you all for your enspireing words.  They have helped alot.  And I can use more hands to hold to help me get through this.  You can email me at ***@****
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Sorry, I just noticed you posted to me earlier. I am kind of in a fog but not drug induced, sinus induced. Thank you for being concerned and your prays, they are helping please continue them as I will with you and everyone else, especially the ones we've come to depend on that are being banned from the forum.
Freedom of speech is the american way isn't it? Shouldn't being on this forum and sharing feelings be the utmost concern when it is truely helping others cuz I know b'belt has helped me probabley more than he realizes...pity things like this happen to good people.
Again, thanks for the kind words and the prays...
Tammy
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Avatar universal
Good for you!!! Wow, what would I do in that situation, not sure if I could be that strong, maybe...cuz the way I felt during detox will haunt me for quite sometime and will probabley be what keeps me from returning to the evil. I have had lung diseases in the past, pluericy and pnemonia and I have a feeling I have something again but fear that it may be the addict in me "overreacting" to my symptoms. Will wait another day or 2 to see if I get an apetite or worse symtoms. How long can one go without eating? I have been nursing a glass or 2 of orange juice for the last 4 days with no food intake.
Linda, I am proud of you...the cravings are worse when you know how close you are to the evil, it just makes you that much stronger when you know you have defeated that craving!!!
Tammy
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Avatar universal
I'm sorry to hear your not feeling well. Congrats on 22. Today is day9 for me. Yesterday I was REALLY tested. The morning was great but then I got home from work to find to "friends" at my house who I know use oxycontin and like to sell them to me. I finally just told them the truth and asked them to leave. It was HARD!!!! Then, two minutes after they leave the phone rings and its someone ELSE wanting to get rid of stuff. I was like, this must be a test! My cravings were out of control. I just stopped answering the phone, and went and picked up my kid. I didn't sleep real good. But hey, Today is day 9 NOT day 1. Thank god.

be safe
linda
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Hope your feeling better hon. I was wondering where you went.I didnt know if that computer virus got you or what. It was a human virus instead..Congrates on day 22. Keep up the good work my friend.. Ill be praying for you to feel better..                      J.E.W.
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Hi Linda..
It is taking everything I have to type this right now. I got HIT big time with a flu/cold and I haven't eaten since Fri nite, every waking moment is a really, really bah headache. Boy, am I being tested and so is my relationship....My BF just went thru a week and a half of "flu like" symptoms with me now I am really and truely sick. Satan really wants me back doesn't he? I was just feeling really, really good and the very next day this hits me.
I have to say I am still clean...DAY 22!!!
Unless OTC cold meds don't count.
Thank you for checking on me, it really means alot to me..
How are you doing??
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Where are you?? Everything OK?

be safe
linda
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Avatar universal
I Have been an addict since86.I drank at first (case of bud dry a night.)Then Id go backand forth from any kind of pill I could get. Never mixed the two. I thought that would kill me!!!!!!!! What a joke..I was killing myself all the time... Well in early 98 I got a hold of oxiecotin mind you no one told me they were time released. I was poppen one every 3to 4hrs. And feelin great..Then my supplier moved. I dont even remember two wks. of my life. I woke up in detox at hospital. From there I went to in house recovery. It was a 12 step program. Learned alot. Stayed there 29 days. All was good for about a month or two. Then I thought I could do some crystal meth. It wasnt my drug of choice so I was alright!! WRONG!!! I ended up taken by ambulance to E.R. had tubes running out of everywhere. Dont remember any of it. Woke up 3 days later in room.. The Dr. tolds me what happend. Did good for awhile..Then I started taking vics,percs,pain patches even did methadone (off the street.)Then on 1/10/03 I woke up took my last 2 vics. And here I am.. Praise The Lord!!! Pillfree  day 13!!!(my lucky # too!!!) God Bless...         Jerri
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Thank you so much for asking...
I have seen many posts from you for many days and I think we have only written twice directly to each other, wasn't sure your story. I now know you are a grandma but that is about it. Are you in detox, recovery, tapering, meth or what?
I am soooooooooo addicted to this forum, everytime I want a pill, I come here. Each day though, I get a project done and them come bach here as oppossed to every sec of the day.
There are sooo many wonderful, wonderful people on this forum, I think it was a549056(Tom) that said yesterday, it would be cool to get everyone in one location to meet in person...
I have issues of addiction and religion that I am getting help with on these forums and they are great!!
Tammy
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hows your new addiction today???(reading this forum..) Im still hooked big time!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I shut off the computer but Im back in 5 or 10 mins.!!!!!!!!!!!! This is pretty crazy huh. But its better than poping pills.. To me its like a natural high. Maybe Im weird or something. You know us grandmas are strange sometimes!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Im so happy to be getting back to myself again. My kids and grandkids like having me back too!!! Isnt life grand!!!!!!!!!! So how you feeling today hon.? I hope as good as me..Dont let those kids drive you nuts... When they grow up and have kids of there own your going to love it...Cause you can spoil them and send em home!!!!!!!!!!!!       God Bless....             J.E W.
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ditto on all your post.......Hope you have a WONDERFULL DAY.. Post me later..         GodBless...       J.E.W.
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Save, you sound sooooo good.
I read over our early posts, and all I can say is YOU ARE DOING IT.
As one of my friends reminded me, "This addiction is like a boxing match, when you think you have it licked, just remember, "IT'S regrouping in "IT'S" corner"; so stay strong and on the offensive!!!

percs
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day 13 its great you have been so much help cant thank you enough,i think i will spoil myself have a cig cup of coffee and a couple of tic tacs .stay strong
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You better keep that polar bear Im cold enough dont want no cold bears on my butt!!!!!!!!!!!! Glad to here youre feeling better. Wnt to work and felt alot better after getting out of the house.. Big day 13 coming up!! Were doing good.. keep at it my friend...         God Bless...       J.E.W.
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I meant to say beautiful post to you Greg!  But life... has em
also!
Peac e and hugs!
suzie
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Beautiful post man!
Suzie hugs ya!
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im doing good alive and kicking feeling much better, did the gym thing it wasnt as hard as i thought it would be , wats that i here rainy and windy and not walking , its like 0 degrese here im walking i think i saw a polar bear today im going to send him your way to bite you in the butt , just joking best to you be strong .
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Hey All,

Great thread.  I have been investing a lot of time in the process of recovery.  Of course, a lot less time than pursuing pills, dr. appointments, flunky pharmasists telling me I have to wait 3 days for them to legally fill the script.  What a friggen joke and pathetic way for me to live. To have freedom from my active addiction and the slave to my addiction that I was, is as Mel Gibson screamed in Braveheart, FREEDOM!

It amazes me how long and just what I would do believing the lie of the drugs, the medical industry is in dire need of a major over haul.  For that matter, so am I.

Well, I am at 45 days opiate free, hitting meetings, working steps with my sponser and actually feeling emotions again.  It feels good to feel human again, a human with an attiude of gratitude and empathy for the newcomer.  The great thing is I really feel the good, happy feelings, the flipside I REALLY feel the sad, regretful emotions too.  Some sort of support group can be the difference between stopping for awhile or staying stopped.

For those of you beginning detox or in the middle of it, this board and the very special, caring people got me through the most horrible WD of my life.  I CT off 400mgs of oxy and a 120mgs perc 325/10 per day for 8 months and have been on various opiates for the last two years.  I couldn't leave the house for two weeks, still have moments of WD from the oxy.  It takes so much courage and determination to stop opiates.  Add a little faith and it can be done.  My prayers are with you all.

rex- your right about the exercising,  I started PT a month ago,it sparked my work out program.  It is amazing how many ailments have gone away as a result of early morning walks and hitting the gym. My strength and endurance is increasing weekly.

hippy- Greetings, my friend.  I just know someday our paths will cross and I look forward to the day I can meet you and say thanks for your generosity of one addict helping another.

percs- it is a conspiracy, oxy is a combo of heroin and methadone.  They and you know who they are, are out to get as many people addicted as possible.  Soylent Green is People.  Old C Heston movie.  The above statement about oxy is NOT true. See, I have got some humor back.  I hope all is well with you, brother.

suzie- love and hugs to you, girl. You are an awesome lady who has helped more people than you know.

I will keep checking in with you all.  I will always be grateful for the people on this board and med help for keeping this board open and uncensored, for the most part. Recovery is a process, just like addiction.  There is no shame in relapse, the shame is not getting back to recovery ASAP.  Once you get your life back, drug free for a period of time, you will not be able to use again and have the enjoyment the drugs origionally provided.  Because once we cross that invisable line of addiction, the days of using successfully or as prescribed are over.  Those who have to use meds for legitamate pain, my prayers are with you.
Strength and Honor
Greg




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