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Could you share your wds stories?

I am in midst of wd right now. Feel like i'm dying. Could anyone share their stories about wd so I know i'm not the only one & what I'm going through is normal?
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Avatar universal
Withdrawal from oxy is not a pleasant ride. It, however, can be done. I was on on oxy for only a month but was completely addicted within three days. It was prescribed by my doctor who gave me no insight into what kind of hell I was heading into. After thirty days on the demon pill I decided I was going to quit cold turkey. At exactly six o'clock on a Saturdy when I was to take my next 20mg pill I walked into the bathroom and poured them into the toilet. I was now on the first moment of withdrawal. By midnight I was beginning to feel the first effects of withdrawal. It was not severe yet but the first of the shakes was beginning.
By the time 24 hours had elapsed I was suffering from cold chills in my back and cuddling up to my wife to try to keep warm. Within three days paranoia, anxiety and depression had set in. I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep and was downright nasty to anybody who came near me. I would reach out in the middle of the night to touch my wife because in my paranoia I had the idea that she may have left me. Inside of a week I was so filled with fear that I was extremely close to outright panic. In  spite of all this, in the back of my mind and my subconcious, I knew that I had to continue. I persevered with the help of my wife and family. They faced the dragon (me) and never backed down. within two weeks my burden began to lighten and within three weeks I was sleeping and eating. Not normally, but enough to keep me sane. By the end of the first month I was very close to normal but normalcy did not come until two months had passed. in the third month I had a very slight bit of a relapse where I became paranoic and anxious again. This lasted for only a day and then I was actually free. The last stage had passed completely and everything was great once again. Since that time I have had no problems. I lied, actually I became slightly paranoic about pills in general and it was a while before I would take any pain killers etc. It was a rough ride but luckily I never fell ooo the horse and managed to ride it to the end. Now, it is not easy, you could fall off the horse time and time again, however you have to go deep into yourself, take hold of all the strength and willpower that you have, climb back onto the horse and keep riding. You may not think so but you do have a hidden strength and willpower as well as a sense of purpose that will come out if you look hard enough for it. It all depends on what you really and truly want for yourself as well as the ones who love you and are pulling for you no matter what. When you are suffering,those that love you are sharing every moment of agony that you go through. Think about this, when you have finished your journey and have accomplished what you thought was impossible you will find yourself in a different world. You will see the clouds and the blue skies again. you will smell the aromas of baking and cooking, you will see the vibrant colors of the flowers, your taste buds will relish every bite you take, you will smile and nod at people you don't know and all will be well with the world. You are alive again. Now is this worth striving for? It most certainly is and everyone here who has completed the journey to sobriety will agree with it.
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Avatar universal
Everyone is different with w/d's.  So, hang in there.  I used pain meds for over 10 years.  Weaned down my dose for two months before stopping.  Still had severe, horrible w/d's.  11 days of hell.  Severe stomach cramps, nausea for 7 days.  Used clonidine, phenegran and zofran for cramps nausea..didn't help, I don't think.  Unable to eat a bite until day 14.  Water in just tiny sips. Two ER visits to treat severe dehydration. They wanted to admit me, but I couldn't do that because of my kids.  My 15 yr old daughter took care of her younger brothers & the house that whole time.  I literally couldn't get out of bed.  Whole body aching, sweats, unable to sleep, sneezing.  When I finally could eat, everything, including water, had this horrid, 'skunky' taste.  Everything smelled 'skunky' too.  I started w/d's at 101 lbs, and at day 14, I was down to 82 lbs.  I was very weak for the 1st two months.  My hair & nails stopped growing for a month following.   When my hair did start growing again, a lot of it had turned gray.  I have never been so ill in my life.  A vivid nightmare I'll never forget, and I will never, ever use pills again.  No way.  However, most don't have as severe symptoms as I did, thankfully.  Hang in there, the end result & being clean is 100% worth it :)
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147172 tn?1226758178
Believe me, you've had stomach viruses and flus worse than this.  MENTALLY you know it's not the flu, which I why sometimes I suggest jumping off when you ARE sick.
It's a mental game as well as physical.  
If you could fix the flu with a pill (or 2 or 20)  and you kNEW within 10-20 minutes you'd be feeling GREAT, of course you would.
Fight the battle within yourself.
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Avatar universal
hang in there I'm in oxy withdrawls right now day2 I feel horible dont give. Up u can tough it out we all belive in you good luck!!!
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228936 tn?1249094248
Don't be intimidated by it. I've done worse. I would say trust in God and and say give me your best shot. Don't have any narcotics lying around.
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Avatar universal
That would be Oxy's ...
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Avatar universal
I'm going CT from 160 mg. starting this Saturday. Any advice?

Thanks so much ...
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228936 tn?1249094248
I could never have dilaudid around and be in withdrawl, The other 2 drugs wouldn't help me but dilaudid is pure dope. I couldn't be anywhere near it.
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Avatar universal
HEY LAURA.....glad to see we both made it thru last night....My lower back hurts really bad tonight...but ya know what....I have dilaudid, soma and flexeril in the drawer for it, and I'm not gonna take it tonight either!!!!  HIP HIP HOORAY for us!!!!!!!!!!!!!    Oh by the way didn't have to RUN to the bathroom at all today...so only had 2 or 3 days of that.  Thank heaven!   Jerri
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401095 tn?1351391770
well today is almost over girl...hang tight
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Avatar universal
Mostly tired, achy, stomach hurts. Hanging in there.Trying to take it 1 day @ a time.
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401095 tn?1351391770
How goes it?
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Avatar universal
PM if you want. Let me know how your doing. We can compare notes. Good Luck.
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511409 tn?1373395178
Hi, just wanted to say its great you found the courage to do this. I think the fear of actually doing it is hard enough. As far as the WD's, something me and the person who went through it together found crappy was the slimy taste of bacon grease that persisted for days 2-4. Sucked. The rest was as already spoken on. Its hell. But, try and remember, you didn't get here in a day or so. So, its gonna take a while. But, Please, remember, its worth it. Good luck and god bless.  Oh, 3 months 12 days for me from a heavy Opiate add.  
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228936 tn?1249094248
I went through withdrawls so many times from so many different drugs. Methadone was the worst because of the time it lasted. Heroin and IV dilaudid were the pits because of instant vomiting and the runs. The pills sucked too , oxy much worse than hydro but it all sucked. The good news, It's been years since those days but we can't afford to forget.
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511524 tn?1266349934
hey laura, my name is chris, my drug of choice was Oxycontin or Heroin. Either one was fine with me, I just needed either one to get me by. I had an evil addiction along with my first real girlfriend/love. We were completely slaves to the drug for a little over 2 years before I got help. At first it was a weekend thing then it turns into a life or death situation without even realizing it. When we couldnt find OC or H, and couldnt handle waiting any longer, I would resort to doctor shopping trying to obtain anything that would ease the withdrawals. Usually I would pull a back injury or chest pain scam and look for percocets, vicodin, and muscle relaxants(primarily hoping for benzos). By almost the end of the second year I had used over 50 different urgent cares and clinics in the Milwaukee area, pretty much the entire southeast Wisconsin medical system and I was widely known. I couldnt even give my name in any hopsital or clinic without getting a dirty look and being turned away, even if it was legit.  I swear we spent out of the two years using we spent a whole year waiting around for the drugs. For the entire second year I couldnt hold a job because I couldnt show up becuase I was too sick or didnt have the motivation. I had no money but luckily(in my eyes at the time), I had a very well-off girlfriend who had lots of money in savings and was just as bad a junky as myself. It turned out to be a recipe for disaster. We spent over $14,000 in less than five months, it was pathetic, and the justifying you do everyday is so absurd, any sober person would be shocked at the amount of manipulating and bullshitting a junky can pull off. By November 07', It was so bad, we both were using/snorting a gram of etremely pure heroin, making daily trips to Green Bay, somehow without a car or a liscense. It was usually with my junky friend who knew the green bay hook-up, we were so ridiculous we would plan the trip up and back around when his roomate went to work. He was able to obtain his roomates code to his safe and get his keys and while he worked from 12 to 7 we would plan the 5 hour round trip in between then and somehow get a way with it more than 20 times. There were defintely some clsoe calls, way too close, but we always were able to get away with it. You would be amazed at what you can accomlish while searching for youre drugs. We were so bad that to even move ourselves from the bed we needed some lines of H or oxy. The summer of 07' we had tried to quit on our own using tramdol, clonidine, and xanax. We were able to stay clean for almost two months but then I legitimately hurt my back at a job I kept for four weeks and it started all over again this time hitting us triple times as hard. I thank god on November 1st my parents recieved a letter about an urgent care viist from back home that was left unpaid from earlier that summer. My parents wouldnt have thought much of it but the date from when it was when i supposedly back at school in Milwaukee and it gave the prescriptions and description of the visit. My parents were divorced so my mom contacted my dad and they all sat down and talked. The first call I was on my way to the last clinic I was not known at yet, picking up a refill a prescription for 30 percs and 20 valiums for a bogus back accident. Those were the last two days I would use for what fealt like forever.  I definitely made sure to numb myself entirely. The call was on Wednesday I broke down and told my prarents everything on Thursday. I agreed to go to a detox that weekend and enter treatment plan. I agreed ot try suboxone which at the item i had only heard about, but had heard was pretty strong stuff. I told my parents everything my girlfriend opted to use the suboxone with me sharing my scripts, probably not the best idea. That saturday morning I took my last two percs and valium and entered Meriter hospital in Madison and enter detox. I was given  immodium, clonidine every 6 hours, .5 mg of lorazepam every half and hour, antinausea medicine, and ambien for sleep. The suboxone doctor only saw patients on the weekdays so I had to wait it out. Those three days were the longest and hardest days of my life. It was pure hell. On monday night I was seen by a sub doctor and he started me on 4 mgs of suboxone daily and set up an after treatment plan in janesville about 25 mintues from home in Illinois. I eventually moved up to 32 mgs of suboxone through the course of the first two months I also addressed a major addiction to benzos and sleeping pills, primarily xanax and ambien. After an intial two week after-treatment program in Janesville I started seeing an addiction specialist in Beloit, Wi. I was on 3mgs of clonazepam during the day and 4 mgs of lorazepam at night, along with 32 mgs of suboxone daily. Well in March I fell skateboarding, and didnt find out until the beginning of May that I Fractured it and separated it severely. I thought it was just a bad sprain I had no idea hat the pain getting worse and worse was a bad fracture. Well my addiction doctor decided to put me on ms contin and cut down the suboxone at first to 1 8 mg tablet then eventuallly to none and 180 mgs of ms contin a day. Doing that I pretty much started up in my old ways using the orthoepedic doctor for pills, along with my addiction specialist and any other person i could find anything else from.  I was also was back to my old ways and getting worse and worse, eating prescriptions by the day that were supposed to last for at least 30 days. I decided through NA  meetings talking to my dad and my sponsor, to make a change. I started something closer to home and a little cheaper, I started going to a methadone clinic. I just started on  tuesday. It has now been almost a week, and I am now at 45 mgs and tomorrow going to 50 mgs. I feel alot more motivated and am not having the urge to constantly obtain pills through whoever I could. At first the suboxone treament this is how I fealt, but it eventually ended. I believe for milder addictions and some poeple suboxone can be an extremely helpful drug. It def. works for a lot of ppl, but for me It just didnt work or I could not allow it to work. Either way i needed soemthing to change, I now had a wonderful sober girlfriend, with a two year old son, and was working full time at a job I could actually somewhat enjoy going to everyday I didnt want to give it all up and end up back with oxys and H, I was pretty much there, but i think going to the clinic was the smartest and best desicion for me. I am going to take day by day and take this on full blown. Regardless of suboxone, methadone, tapering,whatever, youre going to need to wean off and its going to be tough regardless, but right now where I am at, methadone is the best option for me and depending on how you are and you have to be brutally honest with yourself, you need to decide what will work best for you and I cannot stress enough how much counseling, group meetigns, and NA  will actually help. The treatment choice is only part of the recovery, these meetings are essential and you need to want to be clean as well. I wish you the best of luck sorry for the long long story i could go on for hours talking about all the crazy stupid things ive gone through being a junky, im glad im getting my lfie in order. oh and if you were at all curious as to what had happened with my ex-girlfriend who was also a major junky, she moved back home and from what i am told she is clean but i cant honestly say i trust the source or her. and my friend i would go to green bay with started shooting up after january and is still stuck with the devilish disease, claiming that no treatment will work for him. i wish him the best and you as well, peace....
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Avatar universal
I left a Journal of my wd. lesa
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Avatar universal
Hi Laura

I went thru withdrawals about 4 months ago following a 10 year daily vicodin addiction. Noy one day in those years was I without the pills and on most days took about 10 per day.

The worst for me was the feeling that I was crawling out of my skin and the restless legs and arms at night. Sat up reading here every night for weeks. (I also learned that you will not die from lack of sleep...lol)

It helped me to picture each agony as the drugs being forced from my body.

It will get better. Imagine how nice life will be when  everything does not revolve around making sure you have your pills, have enough pills etc etc.
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Avatar universal
I have 2 new posts it tells all about me....sort of....I didn't say how much I weigh....but did tell my ageLOL!!!!!   Wed. I stopped dilaudid and soma.     what was it for you? Tell me about yourself....this discussion has been really good for me , and I am MUCH calmer since I have been posting tonight....I will talk with you.     Love  Jerri
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Avatar universal
Laura....You can do this...You want it and you need it!!! Keep a positive mind set!
♥♥♥JoAnn♥♥♥
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Avatar universal
how many days for you? what is your DOC?
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Avatar universal
Just know I am also going thru this  right now too.     U R  NOT ALONE  God loves you, and so do I.      We'll make it girl!!        Jerri
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401095 tn?1351391770
I locked myself into my house/i live alone/and only left to go to the gym/i was determined i would do that each day if it killed me  LOL....made it and slept alot...no horror stories.....just did not know the aftermath then....do-able-- u will ive thru the physical wds...day by day and worry about 2moro...2moro...u have all of my support girl...DONT EVER SAY U CAN NOT!   ever...it is bad karma
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412194 tn?1233621532
Thanks sweetie and hugzzzzzzzzzzz
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