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Crack Addictions
Hello everyone, I am a happily married women , to a long time crack user. He is very kind and loving, but when he slips and uses for days at a time, he is so withdrawn, and would sell steal or do anything to get what he needs. It has become scary to me, and I dont know how I should approach him, on getting back into a recovery program. He stayed clean for about 8 months, and relapsed just a week ago. He says now after 3 days of re couperating that he has re gained focus, and promises he will fix everything. I think he should be going to some kind of an out patient program or something but i dont know very much about this stuff, can anyone offer me some advice on who to call, or how to talk to him about it with out aggravating him to go out and do it again.
I have all the love in the world for this man, and I will never ever give up on him having the life he deserves.
I have all the love in the world for this man, and I will never ever give up on him having the life he deserves.
Hello, I used and very much abused cocaine for 8 years or so. I've been 100% clean for 2 years and before quitting only used every other month for about a year, before that is was at least twice a week and very large amount within 4 hours. Does anyone know what type of a doctor can run tests to see if a person can have brain damage and what type of test that might be? I have not been the same since I quit, bad memory, nervous around crowds, depression, and the list goes on. I am not the same person I use to be. In order to quit cocaine I started taking ultram for fibromyalia, now I am starting to wean off it and scared to death about how the w/d will be. I am also afraid I will feel like I have nothing to take to forget my problems. It stinks. If anyone knows about testing to see for damage to the brain please let me know. I wonder if my health insurance would cover any of the cost. I'm sure it will be very expensive.
He needs to understand and focus on how it's damaging his life and affecting those around him.
Crack damages 3 areas physically in particular the lungs, heart, and especially the mind. It also ruins relationships with friends, family, and causes financial problems.
He needs to think about the long term effects of smoking crack, rather than the very short lived pleasure. Ask him if it's really worth destroying the mind, body, and spirit to get high?
What does he have to lose if he doesn't stop? A marriage? A career? A bright life ahead of him?
Crack damages 3 areas physically in particular the lungs, heart, and especially the mind. It also ruins relationships with friends, family, and causes financial problems.
He needs to think about the long term effects of smoking crack, rather than the very short lived pleasure. Ask him if it's really worth destroying the mind, body, and spirit to get high?
What does he have to lose if he doesn't stop? A marriage? A career? A bright life ahead of him?
He was seeing a therapist, but he has tried rehab a few times, and is not very receptive to going back, I have asked him just in the past week if he thought he needed more help, and he said yes, But I am away from home working, for another 1-2 weeks. I would have to be the one to make arrangements, he wont do it on his own...
I love my life, I really do, I have the greatest friends, I am best friends with my Mom, I love my home, I have a brand new car, I am making great money, I went on two vacations last year, I seriously LOVE my life, I just HATE when my husband falls off the face of the earth once every how ever many months...and then I am in a world of **** for weeks.
I suggested him going to a hypno therapsit, do you think that stuff really has an effect on the brain? I did have a few friends who quit smoking cigarettes using this method.
I love my life, I really do, I have the greatest friends, I am best friends with my Mom, I love my home, I have a brand new car, I am making great money, I went on two vacations last year, I seriously LOVE my life, I just HATE when my husband falls off the face of the earth once every how ever many months...and then I am in a world of **** for weeks.
I suggested him going to a hypno therapsit, do you think that stuff really has an effect on the brain? I did have a few friends who quit smoking cigarettes using this method.
My ? is when he was clean for the 8 mos did he have a support group to help him through that time or a therapist? Maybe you could gently suggest him contacting some of those people to help him out again. What I do know is that crack is a very strong mental addiction that very few can battle alone! Your right he does deserve to have a wonderful life but so DO YOU!! I hope you don't become so consumed in his addiction that you forget to live the great life you deserve.. wish you the best of luck
reading all of your stories and comments, lets me know there is truth in what I believe, and it gives me great hope for my husband to reach a place where his disease will become nothing more than a hated memory. I have seen him fight for a very long time to stay clean, and I know he can do it, he just lost focus....I should tell him to join this forum.
XOXO
XOXO
The last line of your post sums up all goodness in people, who become a vitcim to this drug. (any drug). I wish you well, and hope you fight your urges like you were in a battle of all battles, we are there to cheer you on.
Nice post PinPin.
You're young and smart, and it's clear that you've had sufficient exposure to crack to know what you're talking about.
It's very good that you quite when you did. I hope you've had enough education in this area and that you never pick up the stem again. It's important for you to understand that the ability to quit crack once does not equate to the ability to quit it again later on. The ability to see the harm to others or to recoginize the loss of $1,000 as significant is fleeting. All too soon such things are seen as an acceptable, and necessary, cost of doing business.
I had a "moment of clarity" about halfway through my last run on crack. That run started w/i 48 hours after getting out of my first rehab and went for 5 months straight. The last 3 weeks were literally 24/7 and I'm still not sure how I got out with my life and my freedom.
The police had me in cuffs twice. Once I was on my knees by the side of the road with 5 cops pointing their guns at me. A week after that I was getting robbed at gun point at 4:00 am, when I was in a way wrong place trying to buy from people I didn't know. I was spending huge blocks of time, at all hours of the day and night, in really bad places, around really bad people, all the time thinking that I was somehow safe. I even got popped by the TSA trying to carry a DIRTY stem, an eight-ball and a gram of powder onto the plane that was to take me to that 2nd rehab. On, and on, and on . . . it was nuts
Anyway I will never forget that moment of clarity. I had been smoking most of the day, every day for over 2 months, but somehow thinking that I hadn't (and wouldn't) return to "full blown addiction" - I was just "using a little before I quit again for good." Standing in my kitchen that day I suddenly SAW THE TRUTH. I wasn't getting close to the line, or even just stepping over it. I KNEW and COMPLETELY UNDERSTOOD that I was WAY, WAY, WAY past the line, that I was completely out of control, that I had no ability to get it together or to stop what I knew was going to happen. I SAW the absolute insanity of it all and I was HORRIFIED.
I realized at that moment that I needed to SCREAM for help. At any cost I needed to SCREAM and BEG for help. I needed to turn to anyone and everyone who would listen. I knew that if I didn't, there was just no hope and that I was going down the drain.
But just a quickly and unexpectedly as that moment of clarity appeared, it faded. It faded completely away. Within minutes I was standing in the same kitchen wondering what the big deal was. Hey! I had it together. I was pulling it off. I was fooling EVERYONE. Sure I needed to quit soon, maybe tomorrow, but not yet, not today. Suddenly the only disturbing thing I could see was the fact that I had actually considered "blowing everything" by telling on myself . . . now THAT was obviously nuts . . . WHAT had I been thinking?
By the time I had the next such moment of clarity it was almost 3 months later and I was about 10 days in to my second rehap. When I left that rehab 112 days after that, I had finally changed the one thing they told me at the first rehab I needed to change if I wanted to stay clean and sober: EVERYTHING.
You know, the big thing isn't that crack is such a nasty drug (although it is). The big thing is that addiction is such a nasty disease.
CATUF
1529
You're young and smart, and it's clear that you've had sufficient exposure to crack to know what you're talking about.
It's very good that you quite when you did. I hope you've had enough education in this area and that you never pick up the stem again. It's important for you to understand that the ability to quit crack once does not equate to the ability to quit it again later on. The ability to see the harm to others or to recoginize the loss of $1,000 as significant is fleeting. All too soon such things are seen as an acceptable, and necessary, cost of doing business.
I had a "moment of clarity" about halfway through my last run on crack. That run started w/i 48 hours after getting out of my first rehab and went for 5 months straight. The last 3 weeks were literally 24/7 and I'm still not sure how I got out with my life and my freedom.
The police had me in cuffs twice. Once I was on my knees by the side of the road with 5 cops pointing their guns at me. A week after that I was getting robbed at gun point at 4:00 am, when I was in a way wrong place trying to buy from people I didn't know. I was spending huge blocks of time, at all hours of the day and night, in really bad places, around really bad people, all the time thinking that I was somehow safe. I even got popped by the TSA trying to carry a DIRTY stem, an eight-ball and a gram of powder onto the plane that was to take me to that 2nd rehab. On, and on, and on . . . it was nuts
Anyway I will never forget that moment of clarity. I had been smoking most of the day, every day for over 2 months, but somehow thinking that I hadn't (and wouldn't) return to "full blown addiction" - I was just "using a little before I quit again for good." Standing in my kitchen that day I suddenly SAW THE TRUTH. I wasn't getting close to the line, or even just stepping over it. I KNEW and COMPLETELY UNDERSTOOD that I was WAY, WAY, WAY past the line, that I was completely out of control, that I had no ability to get it together or to stop what I knew was going to happen. I SAW the absolute insanity of it all and I was HORRIFIED.
I realized at that moment that I needed to SCREAM for help. At any cost I needed to SCREAM and BEG for help. I needed to turn to anyone and everyone who would listen. I knew that if I didn't, there was just no hope and that I was going down the drain.
But just a quickly and unexpectedly as that moment of clarity appeared, it faded. It faded completely away. Within minutes I was standing in the same kitchen wondering what the big deal was. Hey! I had it together. I was pulling it off. I was fooling EVERYONE. Sure I needed to quit soon, maybe tomorrow, but not yet, not today. Suddenly the only disturbing thing I could see was the fact that I had actually considered "blowing everything" by telling on myself . . . now THAT was obviously nuts . . . WHAT had I been thinking?
By the time I had the next such moment of clarity it was almost 3 months later and I was about 10 days in to my second rehap. When I left that rehab 112 days after that, I had finally changed the one thing they told me at the first rehab I needed to change if I wanted to stay clean and sober: EVERYTHING.
You know, the big thing isn't that crack is such a nasty drug (although it is). The big thing is that addiction is such a nasty disease.
CATUF
1529
I have been clean from cocaine about 9 months, but closer to 2 years with a couple minor bumps. I remember that racing feeling laying in bed, so scared and not being able to sleep a wink. It consumed my every thought and took an ambulance ride to finally save me. I just saw your age, your so lucky to have stopped so young, some never do. Your right, it's not physically addicting, but that is the easiest part of addiction, it goes away in a week or so, the mental part does not. Congrats buddy and keep posting:)
I first used Crack about 2 years ago, but I wasn’t ever the type of person who would use daily. At first maybe just once or twice a month for about 4 months, then I quit for 8 months, then somehow I met a dealer at the bar, and did it 2 weekends in a row… then quit for another 8 months… then I thought my life was over (that’s a whole other story) and used about every third day for a month straight… then stopped again for good… one month ago. Now I know my life isn’t over, and there’s absolutely no reason to ruin a perfectly good life.
Well… the way I stopped was simply by thinking of all the damage it causes, and only associating the drug with damage, rather than as a form of pleasure…
The biggest thing… The day after using my vision would be blurry, my mind would be blurry… it’s like someone ran an electrical current through my entire body the day after.
Also… even after abstaining from use for a month after, I would recognize that I would forget things that I should know, whether it be a word, a name, or even an idea I once knew. Thoughts wouldn’t flow through my brain as they once did, and my ideas wouldn’t construct in an orderly fashion.
There was another time when I used when I had just been introduced to crack… I used quite a bit, and I remember laying in bed and my heart was beating very sporadically. It would beat faster and faster, then it would beat out of rhythm, and after laying there for awhile like this it felt like my heart was too tired to beat! It felt exhausted like it just wanted to take a rest! I am very lucky in that moment, I remember thinking I just wish I had this cocaine out of my system once and for all! For a solid 2 weeks after my chest was in a continual pain and felt stiff… My heart was damaged that night.
Then there’s also the lung damage done… The thing about smoking crack, is that users want to take big lung fulls, and hold it for as long as possible. This is very damaging to the lungs, especially if the smoke isn’t cooled through water, or a long hose. I would also say the smoke is very pure… and you can even blow the smoke to someone else, and they will still feel the effects, or put the smoke into a balloon, and take another inhale. You can even smoke it and if you hold it in long enough, and wasn’t the biggest hit ever, you will actually absorb it all.
The high itself is short lived, you can actually feel yourself go up, up, and way up, and peak shortly after the exhale… and then you are at that level for about a minute…after that you can actually feel yourself come down, like on a roller coaster, then you come to a high where you feel satisfied for about 10 minutes… after that you want more.
As for how addictive crack is??? Well this is a tough question to answer because based on my experience it is not physically addicting. I can taste it again in my mouth and throat about 24 hours, although it’s not a very strong craving, however that might be about the only physical craving I will get. It is however VERY psychologically addictive, and the single most reinforcing drug. Reinforcing, as in that was soooo good… the mind remembers the feeling and wants to pursue it again and again and again.
I don’t know about other people, but it took me about 2 weeks to forget about how good the feeling is and move on with my life. It’s these thoughts of using the drug that cause people to pursue it, rather than a physical addiction as in the case of tobacco and heroin.
The good news is that the body has a remarkable ability to heal itself, and after refraining from use, I find that my mind feels better, my heart isn’t stiff or sore, and my lungs are also feeling better. It takes time to recover from the damage… and even so there will definitely be damage done to the mind, but as long as someone stays clean, they can recover their mind and make new neural connections as long as it’s not impaired. I need my mind to do other things, to hear the birds chirping, enjoy great food, goto work, solve problems, appreciate life and what it has to offer.
The best way to quit is to focus on how evil the drug really is, recognizing the damage it does to ones own self and those who surround that person. That’s when someone can wake up from a cocaine dream and finally recognize it as a nightmare.
Well… the way I stopped was simply by thinking of all the damage it causes, and only associating the drug with damage, rather than as a form of pleasure…
The biggest thing… The day after using my vision would be blurry, my mind would be blurry… it’s like someone ran an electrical current through my entire body the day after.
Also… even after abstaining from use for a month after, I would recognize that I would forget things that I should know, whether it be a word, a name, or even an idea I once knew. Thoughts wouldn’t flow through my brain as they once did, and my ideas wouldn’t construct in an orderly fashion.
There was another time when I used when I had just been introduced to crack… I used quite a bit, and I remember laying in bed and my heart was beating very sporadically. It would beat faster and faster, then it would beat out of rhythm, and after laying there for awhile like this it felt like my heart was too tired to beat! It felt exhausted like it just wanted to take a rest! I am very lucky in that moment, I remember thinking I just wish I had this cocaine out of my system once and for all! For a solid 2 weeks after my chest was in a continual pain and felt stiff… My heart was damaged that night.
Then there’s also the lung damage done… The thing about smoking crack, is that users want to take big lung fulls, and hold it for as long as possible. This is very damaging to the lungs, especially if the smoke isn’t cooled through water, or a long hose. I would also say the smoke is very pure… and you can even blow the smoke to someone else, and they will still feel the effects, or put the smoke into a balloon, and take another inhale. You can even smoke it and if you hold it in long enough, and wasn’t the biggest hit ever, you will actually absorb it all.
The high itself is short lived, you can actually feel yourself go up, up, and way up, and peak shortly after the exhale… and then you are at that level for about a minute…after that you can actually feel yourself come down, like on a roller coaster, then you come to a high where you feel satisfied for about 10 minutes… after that you want more.
As for how addictive crack is??? Well this is a tough question to answer because based on my experience it is not physically addicting. I can taste it again in my mouth and throat about 24 hours, although it’s not a very strong craving, however that might be about the only physical craving I will get. It is however VERY psychologically addictive, and the single most reinforcing drug. Reinforcing, as in that was soooo good… the mind remembers the feeling and wants to pursue it again and again and again.
I don’t know about other people, but it took me about 2 weeks to forget about how good the feeling is and move on with my life. It’s these thoughts of using the drug that cause people to pursue it, rather than a physical addiction as in the case of tobacco and heroin.
The good news is that the body has a remarkable ability to heal itself, and after refraining from use, I find that my mind feels better, my heart isn’t stiff or sore, and my lungs are also feeling better. It takes time to recover from the damage… and even so there will definitely be damage done to the mind, but as long as someone stays clean, they can recover their mind and make new neural connections as long as it’s not impaired. I need my mind to do other things, to hear the birds chirping, enjoy great food, goto work, solve problems, appreciate life and what it has to offer.
The best way to quit is to focus on how evil the drug really is, recognizing the damage it does to ones own self and those who surround that person. That’s when someone can wake up from a cocaine dream and finally recognize it as a nightmare.
Congrats on stopping this evil drug. Ive seen so many go down and go down fast. Your right, not many drugs match the damage crack does and extremely difficult to stay clean from. Those dopamine bumps make this drug so mentally addictive it's tough and the crash is hell. Just curious, how long have you been clean from crack and are you seeking any type of aftercare? Did you say you only used a month?
Hello... I'd like to share my own personal experience with smoking Crack... maybe it could help you better understand the drug?
Okay... one thing I will share with you, Crack Cocaine is an extremely destructive drug... by far, the single most destructive drug I have ever done in my entire life.
It is also by far the most pleasurable drug... but that pleasure is very misleading, short lived, and the destruction it causes lasts much longer. Essentially it is evil in it's purest form.
Essentially Cocaine blocks dopamine re uptake at the synapse. Causing high levels of Dopamine at the synapse... it stimulates many many nerves at once and it is this feeling that is very pleasurable.
But let me tell you, each hit you take is like a strong electrical current flowing through the brain, short circuiting neural connections and memories previously developed. Essentially it causes a loss of memory, function, and development with each and every hit.
The day after I experience Crack Cocaine... My brain feels very fuzzy, electrified, i feel withdrawn. I just think about having more. Even though you take a hit... and within 15 minutes you already want another one. That is because the brain will make less dopamine, in an attempt to try and keep equilibrium.
You have to take your husbands addiction very seriously, Crack is the most destructive drug I have ever experienced... everything falls apart when people use crack... it ruins lives, and I have seen it happen. The ruin it causes cascades onto other people who may even be completely innocent to the direct effects of the drug...
I completely lost interest in women, pursuing women, I only wanted to pursue crack... The thought of women wouldn't even come across my mind while using this drug. A previous poster was right, he can't love you when he's in love with crack.
You will have to let him know how you feel about his addiction, what it's doing to him, and of course how it's affecting you.
How did i quit? Well I just stopped... my parents love me too much, and I just realize the high level of destruction it causes, even just using for a month( every 3 days or so). And of course the 1000 dollar loss in my bank account was also a real wake up call.
Okay... one thing I will share with you, Crack Cocaine is an extremely destructive drug... by far, the single most destructive drug I have ever done in my entire life.
It is also by far the most pleasurable drug... but that pleasure is very misleading, short lived, and the destruction it causes lasts much longer. Essentially it is evil in it's purest form.
Essentially Cocaine blocks dopamine re uptake at the synapse. Causing high levels of Dopamine at the synapse... it stimulates many many nerves at once and it is this feeling that is very pleasurable.
But let me tell you, each hit you take is like a strong electrical current flowing through the brain, short circuiting neural connections and memories previously developed. Essentially it causes a loss of memory, function, and development with each and every hit.
The day after I experience Crack Cocaine... My brain feels very fuzzy, electrified, i feel withdrawn. I just think about having more. Even though you take a hit... and within 15 minutes you already want another one. That is because the brain will make less dopamine, in an attempt to try and keep equilibrium.
You have to take your husbands addiction very seriously, Crack is the most destructive drug I have ever experienced... everything falls apart when people use crack... it ruins lives, and I have seen it happen. The ruin it causes cascades onto other people who may even be completely innocent to the direct effects of the drug...
I completely lost interest in women, pursuing women, I only wanted to pursue crack... The thought of women wouldn't even come across my mind while using this drug. A previous poster was right, he can't love you when he's in love with crack.
You will have to let him know how you feel about his addiction, what it's doing to him, and of course how it's affecting you.
How did i quit? Well I just stopped... my parents love me too much, and I just realize the high level of destruction it causes, even just using for a month( every 3 days or so). And of course the 1000 dollar loss in my bank account was also a real wake up call.
Thank you for all your responses. I am more than willing to go and get my self into a support group, although I have been attending my church and speaking to my pastor, and that seems to help me. I understand it probably is a good idea to listen to how other people are coping with living with an addict, but I honestly dont want to get to emotionally envolved in other peoples lives, I just want to focus on my own, and how to help my husband. It is troubling to me that there is not a way to go about this with out having to put your face in front of a group of people, I am a very privite person for the most part.
Good luck to you all, god bless.
Good luck to you all, god bless.
Well as you asked for help for yourself I would suggest getting into a support group with others in the same position. There is al anon for families of alcoholics and Na anon for families of addicts. Then you can learn new tools not to enable and other's will share there experience of what they have done with there partners. I wish you well as a recovering addict and as a person who has been in a relationship with a using addict and I just too relapsed after a yr clean, I know how you feel and the only part in it that you are responsible for is you. Blessings to you .
Everybody that smokes rock and quits for three days regains focus and promises to fix everything. Until another rock comes along. Listen to the advice given you by Kleen. It is in Hubby's best interest to not do coke any longer...... the stuff is unhealthy and dangerous for anyone. And like Kleen said - - Dont transfer ownership of the addiction - you dont aggravate him to do anything. Thats his choice and a poor one.
Hi & Welcome,
You can't be happily married if you are living with an active crack addict. Loving an addict is never happy.
I am sorry to hear that he relapsed and I will guess that he did not have an aftercare program once he got clean 8 months ago. If he started out with one then he did not follow through on it. I cannot stress how important it is, especially with crack, that he keep himself in aftercare.
No one expects you to give up on him but please know that you cannot fix him. All the love in the world will not get him clean unless HE WANTS it.
Right now crack is his love and his best friend and his life. That does not mean he does not love you, he cannot help but focus only the drug right now.
I think a little "tough love" is in order right now, for you and for him. Put your foot down, tell him he has to make a choice. In doing so you will become stronger and it will, possible make him see that he has to make a choice. Be prepared for both outcomes. If you hold his hand right now, he may never get clean. Why would he when he has someone supporting him through his active addiction. Make sense?
And hun, please do not worry about "you" aggravating him to go out and use again. that is HIS choice. Please, please, don't blame yourself.
I am heart broken when I read posts like this and I wish you the best and hope that he makes the right decision.
Please stick around and listen to all the folks here have to offer. The members here are in all stages of recovery and can help you get through this.
You can't be happily married if you are living with an active crack addict. Loving an addict is never happy.
I am sorry to hear that he relapsed and I will guess that he did not have an aftercare program once he got clean 8 months ago. If he started out with one then he did not follow through on it. I cannot stress how important it is, especially with crack, that he keep himself in aftercare.
No one expects you to give up on him but please know that you cannot fix him. All the love in the world will not get him clean unless HE WANTS it.
Right now crack is his love and his best friend and his life. That does not mean he does not love you, he cannot help but focus only the drug right now.
I think a little "tough love" is in order right now, for you and for him. Put your foot down, tell him he has to make a choice. In doing so you will become stronger and it will, possible make him see that he has to make a choice. Be prepared for both outcomes. If you hold his hand right now, he may never get clean. Why would he when he has someone supporting him through his active addiction. Make sense?
And hun, please do not worry about "you" aggravating him to go out and use again. that is HIS choice. Please, please, don't blame yourself.
I am heart broken when I read posts like this and I wish you the best and hope that he makes the right decision.
Please stick around and listen to all the folks here have to offer. The members here are in all stages of recovery and can help you get through this.
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