Crack Hell!

[Kate]

I have just ended a year long relationship with a 15 year crack addict. He is the sweetest, smartest, most handsome man I have ever met. He is so gifted in so many ways. But he loves using more than anything in the world. I have spent 2 years of my salary on him, trying to get him clean. Two mental hospitals, four rehabs and six arrests later he is up to about a 3-4 hundred dollar a day habit. I know it has to come from within him and there is nothing else I can do. I would stay with him, if he would just stop the constant lying and cheating. Lies about everything and cheating with crack-whores and junkies.
What is it about Crack that would make someone want it more than your basic animal instincts of food, clothing & shelter. I have been tempted to try it just so I know the feeling. Any advice?

[tdn1968]

Well if it gives anyone hope, I was a hardcore crack addict for 19 years!  I have been clean and living a wonderfully blessed life for the past 4 1/2 years.  I'm a very productive part of society, I work for a criminal defense attorney, I just got married this year to my soul mate (I'm 38 years old) and my life has never been better.  Sure, the crack messes with your mind long after you've been clean, but I wouldn't say that you never get your pleasure senses back.  I know I depleted many of those cells, but I function normally, am very happy.  And remember, for addicts, tough love is a MUST!  Today, I'm a wonderful mother of 2, a wife, a good daughter, a good sister, a good aunt, a good employee!!
Peace and blessings!

[ladyruzzo]

I ask for prayers for me to be strong and stay clear.  I have dealt with a crack addict for over 5 years now.  I found out 8 weeks into our relationship and I advised to get out.  I have been there through so much and he has hurt me so much.  I am so surprised to read so many people saying how gifted, talented, sweet and wonderful these folks can be.  And I AGREE!  which is why I hung in there so long.  I kept thinking the GOOD in him is going to come out and over power the drug.  He insist he can stop on his own..and uses cigs and weed as a way to stop.  I know that is just another part of denial.  He won't get help.  He says he has been clean for about 6 months but sometimes his behavior says otherwise.  He is also the sweetest talker and always gets me to believe that I somehow caused an  argument or pissed him off when things are bad between us.  I am 55 years old and he is 58--I say this to the young people out there...TRY --give it all you have--to get off the drugs and into your true LIFE.  I know this drug is powerful.  I have never used, but seeing what it does to someone.  I end this letting your know for those that LOVE you this is an long and hard journey.  To let you go to walk away is just as hard for those that must do it as it is for you to break the habit.  I ask for prayers on my journey at this time.  My heart is broken in ways I never thought possible and as I said.  I'm not young.

[cncj]

Wow!  I am glad I found this thread.  I just started a "relationship" with a guy and very quickly discovered he is a crack addict.  He admits it, but says that he is functional, which he is, when it comes to his job.  But in the very short time we have been together, I have watched him change completely.  I just don't want to believe that he has lied to me about everything. I was very wary about getting involved, because I had been so hurt by my ex-husband. This guy was very honest about not wanting to be committed.  But he can be so sweet, yet sending mixed signals.  I think part of him really does care about me, but when he is using, he doesn't honor my wishes about not wanting to be around it at all.  I am just glad to know that it is not me, it's him.

[ChrisSJohnson]

In trying to find out if my son us using crack. He is very Moody. Just hard to talk to him without him having a attitude. I found something in a black container. I think it is crack? How can I tell?

[cilla_]

i'm struggling with this addiction myself. it's ruining my life and i've tried to kill myself twice because of how miserable it makes me. but it's all that i can think about, i torture myself constantly wanting another hit, then when i get that hit, all i want is another one. plz dont try it... im going to die because of this.

[southcarolinasexy]

I disagree with dice too..at 49 and new to the dating game...I fell for a smoker...I didn't know he smoked..i knew he was doing something..big pupils...red looking eyes..acting paranoid....lying about small ****.......then when he would make excuses to leave......pic fights to get away.....then finally moved to that crack hotel....where he fitted in and loved it. He never had to go find it...it was there 24/7...  I finally realized he wanted nothing but to get high....quit work...started hanging around smokers....driving them everywhere....calling them family and ****..GET AWAY FROM A CRACK SMOKING MAN...HE LEFT ME SAYING...I LOVE YOU TO MUCH TO HURT YOU.....I thank god for blocking the devil from destroying me... GOD INTERVENED BECAUSE MY LOVE WAS BLIND....LISTEN..........A CRACK SMOKER HAS NO FUTURE....KEEP IT MOVING......ON--- ON TO THE NEXT.....

ITS BEEN 6 months...dude still smoking...moved in wit a fat black chick,,who thinks she got a good dude...running him to church....getting loans for him...paying his car..feeding hm.....she doesn't know.....I pray ole T.R don't take down with his ship.......ITS FULL F HOLES AND IS ON A ONE WAY TRIP TO HELL.......don't walk ladies........run like hell......RUUUUUN.

[marbywyatt]

My heart goes out to you.  Your situation and mine sound so much the same.  I was in a relationship with a crack addict for 6 years.  He waned on and off the drug, and, like your man, is one of the most gentle, creative, wonderful people I have ever known.  But at the end of the day, the lying, the let down promises and the cheating on me with hookers just became more than I could stand.  I felt like I was falling into a bottomless pit and that the relationship sucked me dry (never mind the financial cost).  I loved him like no one before but had to let him go.  I know how hard it is and just want to say I'm standing by you in cyber-space because you need to do what's right for you and protect yourself.  It is the greatest gift of self-love you could ever give yourself.  And probably one of the toughest things you have done in your life.  

The whole time I was with him, I kept thinking it was me that had the issues (not sexy enough, not interesting enough, never good enough for him) but now I realize those were all fall-outs from his brain in addiction.  I am working with a really great counsellor to rebuild my self esteem and reminding myself of all the goodness in me and in the world.  It's there, we just have to see it.  Power, strength and love to you Kate.

[sexyperrybsexy]

Mam I told myself I wool never try that drug. I was promiscuous I had sex with men that were crack  smokers. They would always ask me to just try it. Still I was scared. Then one day my curiosity got the best of me. The first experience was the most amazing high I had ever experienced in my life. So I told myself . I will just do a little bit and go to bed. Well that little bit turned into me being late for work everyday to only working to buy drugs. I lost my house ,my car, most important those men I got high with and sex with are no longer in my life. I hid it well ,what I mean is I still could  function until I lost everything my job it was over for now. I've been smoking since I was 28yrs old. I am 38yrs old now. I ve been clean for 8 months . But theirs not a day go by that I don't think about getting high. I've been thru hell and back and then back to hell 3 times. I'm tired of that lifestyle I pray to God everyday for support. If not I will keep it inside and start using again. I found out I was HIV positive I was devastated. I couldn't believe this had happened to me. That drug does not discriminate. But I've been thru so much and have lost so much. I feel I am on the right track I pray every day I also journal when I am heavy with those thoughts. I am  happy
now I have clarity in my mind. I have repaired broken relationships with family an friends . What ever u do PLEASE don't try this terrible drug it is the devil an he will still everything from u like he's done to me and many many more people. I am going to pray for u and ur family. Take care and God bless .perry b

[Ballgame]

You replied to a thread that is 10 years old
Start a new one for better response

[tiredofthelies71]

I disagree dice... she should get as far away as possible. Love is NOT enough to help him. The only thing loving a crackhead will do is destroy you. He will NOT quite for you, children, family, or jobs. He will continue to smoke until HE decides he wants help and even then the odds are not in his favor. She can't cure his infection she isn't God. Let him go and get the help you need for yourself.

[dicefmoney]

If you love him don't give up he will die with out you. Hes  infected its hard to understand from outside looking in but its not him its his infection.          

U might b the only person that still love him

[louisxxi]

God yes, and moving away from it and keeping your a55 busy with a job. If you don't move away and start fresh it only takes one chance meeting with another jackass who smokes it to set it back in motion again. YOU will do it again if you are around people who do it.When you take root in another place, stay away from the types that drink and do drugs, that's just common sense.Lastly, stay alert. Once you have worked a while and you start getting your feet under you again, you will get that feeling of accomplishment.This is good. However, the craving to do it again will NEVER be completely gone. So you have to be on your toes and always remember that it isn't worth it.Just keep busy, cherish the ones you love,and never forget the bad times so you can stay in the good ones.

The golden rule concerning crack: "One hit is too many, a thousand is not enough".

[debbie511]

Please watch out for xanax dependence. I started taking Ativan (a similar benzodiazapam) to alleviate the anxiety created by living with a crack addict. I only took them as prescribed, 1 pill a day as needed. I became dependent on the pill and had to get help from my doctor to taper off. Believe me, I'm no wussy either. This class of pill is highly addictive and the side effects of coming off are horrible and took me 30 days to recover. Google it and read what others say about it and you will think twice about using this drug or other benzos. This was another wake-up call for me that helped me realize that living with a crack addict is not healthy and not bearable for me. Maybe others can do it but if I need a pill to help me bear the discomfort of daily living, than something is wrong. The real question for me is, "what is it about ME that makes me stay in this kind of abusive relationship?"  IT'S NOT THEM.

[debbie511]

Press charges

[babyhawkinss2012]

DO NOT TRY IT!!! ITZ THE GATEWAY TO HELL!!! IT JUST WANTS TO TRAP YOU TOO! BEEN THERE DONE THAT. MARRIED AN ADDICT THINKING THINGS WOULD CHANGE. IDK WHAT IT IS ABOUT CRACK BUT IT WILL TAKE GOD TO GET YOU OFF OF IT!!

[love1962]

My husband of 2 years is a crack head. It's a horrible feeling for someone you love to steal money from you and constantly lie to you. I have truly loved him for him and its so hurtful that I feel now he's cheating on me. He is trying to be with someone who will allow him to do what he wants to do. I put him out immediately upon finding out he was doing drugs and he is living with his sister and she allows him to do whatever he wants to do. He was a faithful Christian man that went to church faithfully and loved the Lord and its like Satan took over. He is constantly telling lies and trying to cheat me out of the money he owes me some stealing from me. It's so painful and disgusting. Thank you for your feed back it helped me so much.

[NCC_1701]

God, this is so depressing.  I have a crack ***** for a wife and I guess I should have known where it was headed.  We've been married for a year and a half and she's already been in jail twice.  She got off parole after five years and is now on probation on another charge.  One of the times she went to jail I had her violated by her PO.  All it did was hurt her kids and prolong this agony.  I'm here reading all this trying to decide if I should do it again.  It sure would make me getting out of here a whole lot easier.  In any case, I'm seeing a lawyer tomorrow.

I've been sober for just past 30 years now so aside from loving her with all my heart, I have a special place in there that wanted to help her but all I did was enable her.  I've discovered the secret to living with a crack addict: have an unlimited source of funds, an infinite amount of patients, and repeat after me - "Yes Dear!"  That's the only way it will ever work.  Looking back, it was the only time she was ever happy - when she got everything she wanted.  She never takes responsibility for what she does, there is always an excuse and it never had anything to do with her.

It's such a shame.  A beautiful woman with hope and desire, all wasted on the next hit.  The lies, the money, the screwing around, I mean really, this is not a marriage.  And as for the kids, I have to keep reminding myself I didn't do this to them, she did.

She is a user; drugs, people, money, it never ends - except of course in death.  I love her too much to stick around and watch that.

[johnnyfan]

i have with the same person for 5 years, it has recently come to my attention that he has been doing crack , cocaine and god only knows for some time, i would really like to believe the :im sorry" i love you" and the "your more important" but i cant. i was told more than once that he stopped and would never touch them again, ive cried myself to sleep more than once. Noone knows how bad i just want to tell hime to get out and that i never want to see him again but i cant.. my sister is going through the same thing i am. her boyfriend as far as i know got him into it...one day i will be strong enough to tell him to get out becaues i cant take it anymore

[theirmama]

Pretty sure she was just sharing an experience. Tons of ppl still see these old posts bcuz google and other search engines direct them here for whatever reason.

[missmae03]

WOW, I did not even see the 2000 HAHA thanks!

[missmae03]

me?

[missmae03]

The next couple of days on the news there was a person who stole a taxi - put a knife to the driver but the driver manage to run off. The cops were in the oppisite direction and the person saw and paniced and crashed into a semi-truck. IT WAS HIM... I checked my messages on nexopia the next day and it said "I'm going to downtown and smoke my sh*t and come to your house and kill you" the news said the driver was headed to the downtown core. THANK GOD he didn't make it to my house. The calls started coming in from jail. He would love me the next day and hate me the next. Then I started to avoid his calls and he accused me of cheating while he was in jail for 11 months. Now he is out of my life!!! EVERYTHING made so much sense when I found of he smoked crack. All the lies and all the time he was so violent with me.  GIRLS PLEASE GET YOURSELF OUT OF THIS SITUATION! ALL CRACKHEADS THINK ABOUT IS CRACK AND WANTING MORE AND MORE AND THEY WILL HURT THE PEOPLE WHO ARE CLOSEST TO THEM BECAUSE THOSE PEOPLE ARE THE ONES WHO USUALLY SUPPORT IT AND ARE SCARED TO LOOSE THEM.  This situation not only has effected my future but i think about him everyday, not because I still love him because I can't not forget him. all the places in calgary remind me of him. It hurts but I keep strong. You gotta look at it in a way where as you live and you learn. It has lowered my self esteem so much that I don't love myself. I can't get into a serious relationship because I can't trust any man. ONCE YOU DRAW YOURSELF AND SUPPORT SOMEONE WITH THIS DIRTY HABIT YOU WILL ONLY FEEL GUILT IN THE END - YOU WILL ONLY HATE YOURSELF AND IF YOU DON'T LOVE YOURSELF YOU CAN'T LOVE ANYONE ELSE. this goes for all users and NON users. CRACKHEADS can't LOVE ANYONE because they don't love themselevs to begin with they only love the high. US WHO DEAL WITH IT - hate ourselves because of what we put ourself through ... well STOP BEFORE YOU HATE YOURSELF EVEN MORE. I hate to say but you put yourself in this position - just like I put myself in mine. Just put your mind into it and you can do it. DO IT FOR YOURSELF. don't do it for someone who will ruin your life.
I hope this story encouraged all of you..

GOD BLESS!

[missmae03]

He would whine and cry to me about everything and how he lost his life.... I finally got rid of him the next day at 6 a.m in the morning. He kept calling and calling.... He told me to met him somewhere and I told him i would be there but I really didn't want to. I got my cousin to pick up my phone and tell him that I left my cell phone at home and that I was on my way and he said "you're a fu*kin liar" and hung  up. He called again and said he would come to my house if I wasn't there in the next hour. My cousin advise that I called the cops. So I finally had the courage to. I told them to met me across the street at the gas station. I told them the location and I stayed away from my house and told my brother to lock all the windows. He called my little brother and said "do me a favor and tell your sister she's dead" and hung up. the cops called me an hour later and told me they went to the location but he left 10 minutes before. AN HOUR LATER? it took 10 minutes to get there!!!. My cousin and I sat in my car parked til 4 a.m and we finally decided to  come home we were so scared to get out of the car in fear of him being there but he wasn't we slept in my brother's room cause we were so scared.

[missmae03]

I told him to stop and he finally left me alone. I had to go to the doctors cause he dislocated my jaw. I left him the next three days because it was the only available flight and i was not up to take the 24 ride back to calgary. I had to act like nothing was wrong with me those 3 days and his dad knew right when he saw me and took me to the doctors I had to lie and say I fell in the tub. He knew and before I iwas leaving to take my flight I told him and he told me I deserve someone who loves me and he was only going to ruin me. I left. After he had to courage to finally admit to me on MSN MESSENGER that he was smoking it in jail for those 11 months he was there cause he thought he would never get out. he told me he was coming back to calgary cause his dad and him got into a fight. he came back and called me and threated me saying if I didn't see him he would come to my house and kill my family. I was so scared of him that I didn't know what to do BUT see him because I knew he would actually come to my house and something WOULD happen for sure. So I met up with him and he wouldn't smoke it around me but he would be so depressed.

[missmae03]

He didn't get home til 6 a.m.. WHAT A JOKE!!! From that day I told him he needed to go back to his father (who lived in the Yukon - we were in Calgary at the time). I took the greyhound with him 24 hours long!! His Dad is a loving and understanding person and has had problems with my ex ever since he was 14. He helped me get a job and everything. I had to go back to calgary for my best friends birthday and I was even surpirsed he let me.  To make the story short - I got back there and he was smoking it right in front of me he would go to the corner and look back right and left and smoke from his damn water bottle pipe he made then after he would walk all over the house with a febrezze bottle which was replaced with water and soup and he would spray it all around the house (thinking it would take the smell away- YA RIGHT!!). the next day he was out - he was trying to feel up on me and have sex with me and i told him "you're so unattractive right now!! you don't think I know what you're doing" and he would look down and be like "i know" and then the next minute he would get so mad he would say "why are u not putting out what the FU*K is your problem"  then he grabbed my legs and dragged me all over the house and I ran to the washroom. He was banging on the door and he said if  I didnt come out he would have to break the door so I came out he punched me right in the jaw I literally saw stars and got knocked out for 2 seconds. I ran to the bedroom and he grabbed my jaw and pushed me aginist the wall and he told me to be quiet he threw me on the bed. I thought I was going to get raped. I started kicking him and he grabbed my legs and started to punch my stomach.