Day 10 and FINALLY got a sponsor

After being in the program for nearly 4 years, and coming off of a nasty relapse, I finally swollowed my pride and reached out for a sponsor. 4 years ago I didn't do this and never worked the steps. I am certain this is what lead to my relapse. I am willing to do whatever it takes to fight this battle and the people kept saying "get a sponsor" so I did.

I am over the physical WD's, thank God. That is so rough. But it is so worth it.
Does anyone work with a sponsor on have you done the steps? It is as theraptic as everyone says? Did it set you free? I am fearful yet grateful for what is coming my way.

Hope everyone is well! =)

[Htownnofrown]

Through working the steps all the promises or the program have come true in my life. I have found a new freedom without drugs and my life is not run by drugs and alcohol or my character defects. I have been clean of all mind altering substances for almost 16 months and working the steps with a sponsor has allowed me to "get right" with myself and my higher power. It is by far the most beneficial thing I have ever done for my sobriety and my life in general. Work them to the best of your ability with the guidance of your sponsor and you will be amazed at the way they change your life for the better. Good luck!

[LMB01]

Thank you for your response. I just really needed to hear that someone had a good experience with the steps. I am so afraid to work them and I am certain that is why I went back to using. I never faced my problems. I stopped going to meetings, wasn't hanging out with clean and sober people. I NEED to do things differently this time. Thanks again, I really appreciate it. Laura

[LMB01]

PS- YAY!!! CONGRATS!!!! on your clean time! I truly is an inspiration! =)

[gizzy32]

Congrats on those 10 days and working the program. It sounds like you have made some changes and loved what you said about how your gonna do whatever it takes this time. I don't know you, but I am proud of you. Keep it up, your doing great:)

[Addict63]

Congrats on your clean time!

You've also made a huge step forward in your recovery by forming that partnership with another in the program. Your H.P. is truly working in your life. I've had my AA sponsor for many years. Prior to getting my sponsor I just didn't use and went to meetings. No working of the steps either. I wasn't very happy. When I finally asked him to be my sponsor he told me I gotta grow for myself by facing reality, (grim as it may be at times). He said he also would not help me to "wallow in limbo" lol, or solve my problems for me. He told me we will actually help each other to become what God meant us to be, mature adults.  And with that, the first thing he did is have me go through the steps, especially the house cleaning steps. When I went to his house and did the 5th through 7th steps for the first time I came away feeling wonderful, because I could finally accept myself. It's a totally new life. I found by accepting myself, I could accept other people also. Prior to that I was looking at everyone else, and not myself, and passing judgement.

I talked to him when my doctor wrote my 1st script for pain pills. We went through certain pages in the Big Book that deal with that. He's been with me throughout all of the past 2 years with my various pain management programs, and now I'm off everything. Just like you. Throughout the ordeal he never judged me. As and addict and cross addicted alcoholic I'm used to being judged. I really had my ups and downs, especially depression coming off of Ambien right after coming off of opiates.

You'll also find that through your sponsor, you'll quickly learn how to be a sponsor yourself. Helping others keeps us clean. My sponsors told me many times I've been helping to keep HIM sober all these years!

Sorry this is so long, but its a subject I can write about from my wonderful experience. Enjoy your new life clean, and above all, enjoy your new sponsor partnership LMB01!

[LMB01]

Wow, Addict63, you gave me goose bumps! Thank you so much for sharing.

You touched me when you said my HP was working in my life. I say this because, for many years I wouldn't get sponsor, I didn't "need" one nor "want" one! I could bite my tongue and solve all of the worlds problems and not need the help of anyone, especially a "sponsor!" HA, we know where that lead me....right back to using! So the other night, while at a meeting, I shared my struggles, my past views on sponsorship and my fear of working the steps. After the meeting Kelly came up to me and said "I am your sponsor, I will be your temp sponsor, your sponsor for 5 years, or forever, but I am your sponsor." I looked at her like she was CRAZY! I haven't asked anyone to sponsor me in 4 years of being in the program. Who the heck was this lady to tell me she is it?!?!? She shared how she was exactly like me, and wouldn't get a sponsor and someone went up to her and said the exact same thing "I am your sponsor." She told me that lady saved her life. I swallowed my pride, and said ok...I will work with you as long as I feel it is a good fit, for both of us. And we went for coffee as soon as we left that meeting. Now, as you have said my HP was truly working, because I love her already! She truly is MY sponsor. There was a connection/vibe instantly. I know in my heart that this lady is who I am supposed to work the steps with!

You are RIGHT, my HP is working in my life!!! Wow, you see... I also have a hard time understanding HP, so you just made me realize this is it! This is him reaching out to me! I have started every morning out with "Thank You, God...help me find you!"

I am so glad you shared your experience with me. I am now looking forward to working with Kelly and starting a NEW life!

Thanks again! :)

[keith600]

Rather then swallowing your pride I"d say that you took a gigantic step forward. Being a member of N.A for 9 years I"m happy to see that your going the 12 step way but its the fact that your reaching out and ready to take suggestions thats important regardless of where you seek help and there are succes stories in every route thats been taken. There will be days that ya just dont feel like gettin into it (working the steps) and you"ll find all kinds of excuses not to but those are the days you need to. Like when ya really dont feel like going to a meeting but thats probably when ya really should. I"ve always felt better after a meeting then before and thats how it should be rather your going to na/aa,addiction dr., religion or however your getting your recovery,,gl to ya

[Beccabeccalynn]

I have a sponsor and I work the steps I am on step 4 and have been on it to long I think but my sponsor says it is what it is , and your right where your supposed to be. Ugh sometimes that bugs and when I tell her she just laughs and pats my hand. I don't use my sponsor as much as I am supposed to but I am a work in progress. My goal is to have more contact with her.
Congrats , becca

[LMB01]

Thank you, Keith and Becca.
I truly appreciate your comments. They both gave me inspiration!