Day 3 off norco.... Need extra support

[Vibe1luv]

Well here goes. I started popping hydro here n there in 2012... Yes for fun and the up.
FF to June 2013. I had a shoulder injury and severe carpal tunnel. Saw an ortho who gave me norco and set up a date for surgery. Dec 2014 I had surgery. The relief was instant but the addiction to pain meds wasn't recognized. I got a few more scripts and proceeded to buy them off the street. Get them from friends. I rarely took a whole pill as I never wanted to take more then the docs had recommended. I stayed at a constant 5 mgs every three to five hours. Maybe more given how many pills I had. Fast forward again to July of 2015. I recognized I no
Longer needed the pills and decided to taper. Never happened. August okay girl time to quit. Told myself I'd tell my husband the extent of my use and quit the day after my sons bday. 8-29 I took my last norco at 8 pm. Half a ten mg.
leaves me at day three. Body hurts. Not much of the runs or vomiting. I still have a little appetite. First day horrible body aches. Twitching. Anxiety. Tears. About the same. The next day with some runs and vomiting. My husband is 20 years clean and has been great. I'm exhausted with anxiety. I've been exercising minimally. I am a spin bike instructor and I took a week off. I go back hard next Tuesday. I know I need my endorphin rush. More than the hydro high. Will this fatigue leave me!?!? Any way I can help it. I lost a son twenty years ago and have dealt with anxiety and panic sense. I'm not afraid of it as the hydro was making me anxious. But should I fill my klonopon.
I want myself back. How long will this fatigue last!?!?
TIA- need some extra support n love

[VICourageous]

You do sound GREAT!! Good for YOU! I still will try to get that PM out! I think it is much easier for us that are on a big screen computer then the phone. You can see what recent activities are going on at the right side and all other info on the right. I never used the phone, so I am not sure what all you guys can see. I like the Big Computer Screen because I can see so much more.

I am so proud for YOU!! Keep it up!
Bless
Vickie

[Vibe1luv]

I obviously don't know how to navigate this site.. Really. I can't even load photos and don't wanna pull out the lap top.
But I've been thinking science. And God. And universe. And being. Energy. And I took my own lead with the scientific approach. LOL. I could decide why and how I'm wired and responding as I am. But nah. I think I'll keep up thinking of my recovery in spiritual science ways.
I made it joyfully through yesterday. Day ??? IDK... I feel like each day is the rest of my life. But I think it's like six. That seems like a small number. But could also be so big.
I had a great night out with friends. Oysters. Dinner. Ice cream. And my bad coffee. I was up til one talking philosophy with my devoted husband. I figure I got five hours of full sleep!!! Awesome. And how nice to get up with a clear mind. This being sober without a vice grip controlling me rocks!!! I don't even wanna question it just for today. I do know I'll have to discover they why in order to stay off pills. But it feels so awesome to be here.
I wrote a letter to my old self for when I feel weak.
I finally went to the bathroom and it was like another achievement. LOL. I feel clean.
I'm four days I know this into a cleanse. Not stomach intestine but blood water limphatic system cleanse. I would say this is a good idea for anyone detoxing. I cut my hair short LOVE IT. And I actually picked up weights yesterday!! Excited to get my muscles back.
I'm ready to do this day. I'm prepared for all that is ahead just for today. Figuring ways to let go of the norco mind f$&k. And I know I'm stronger.

[VICourageous]

Hello Again. I will send you a PM and tell you were you can find this info on many sites. They have tons of books out now and also videos about this in a more Scientific way. It will not cure you , but as a long ash users since I was 14, I found this info very interesting and NOW understand why it took me so so long to balance out Mentally. The Brain Chems get really whacked out with different types of drugs. There is also a Mid-brain (pleasure) that will always remember such pleasure if you feed it again or even think about it.  It could even be a cookie your grandma made yrs and yrs ago for you and that part of the brain will remember how wonderful and pleasurable it was. I did put 3 pieces of info in my journal back in 2012. I will PM and see if you know your way around. Have to go out but I will be back later.
Just take it easy and Surrender this to your God and have Patience. Time is our greatest healer right now.
Bless
Vickie

[Jerry198]

I'm not the meeting type I just worked things out my way many times I wanted to but not to good at letting my private life out but is it helps then go for it  but no matter what there should be no shame it getting clean even if we have done things were not proud of !! that's just moving forward I wish you the best in your recovery and have a great weekend.

[Vibe1luv]

Thanks hon. Yeah a meeting. I'm intimidated coz I live in a small city. I know a lot of ppl. But even my husband says he will go with me. But today is a woman only. But they do have an open one. He says part of the process is no shame when he quit he told his entire family. But understands not telling. He didn't tell everyone per say. Like his business partner. And I think how will my clients feel knowing I help train their body and mind. But I do know I'm liked and respected. I'm confused on this.
I'm totally constipated. I stopped the  Imodium. I've eaten so clean. It's like a nightmare to a norco morning. I haven't had any coffee. So I'm gonna blame it all on that. Maybe I'll try a half a cup. Help pooh and get this headache gone. I wake up way easier. But I'm feeling the irritability.
Meeting friends tonight for dinner. Then gonna head to the hills to camp Saturday. Won't be any pill dealers there. So that's good. God my dealers were fu$&ers. I suppose my doctor is too. No one even talked about not taking the narcotic. Something wrong there.
Love and thanks and blessings.

[gnarly_1]

Hey Girl  .....well your doing great and your attitude about the whole thing is great....you just got to go threw it to get to the other side the ''mental mindscrew'' is a different story  time to get to a meeting  im glad you found one for today with time you will loose the very desire to use  N/A is the only progam I know of that can do that and it treats the addict that is still alive and well long after the pills stop keep posting for support where all hear for you........Gnarly

[Vibe1luv]

Yes!! Getting my hair cut today was a trigger. Normally I'd take a norc first.
Study in a scientific way? Can u explain. I don't know much about science. Just English and nature lol
I'm heading to get my grandson. I worked with my husband the past two days and he has to go out of town at four am tomorrow. Ohhh no... Not me. So I thought having my grand would help keep me occupied. And we can connect on a clean for me level. The last six months I haven't been myself. And he is an amazing creature.
I'm camping this weekend. Trigger. And cutting firewood. Trigger. OMG I was so dependent life is a trigger. I found a Friday woman's only meeting to start the weekend right. I'm on day what!!!!?? I even feel like keeping track is a trigger. But not super strong. Just could be overwhelming if I dwelled on it. Which having dealt with anxiety/panic/OCD for twenty years I have all the tools I need to distract myself.
I am so glad I married this wonderful man. How can I ever thank him enough.
And u all. TY

[VICourageous]

I think You are doing all the right things. The Sleep & Energy is the last as far as Physical. The Mental is the part that we must work on. These Cravings will come and go as life goes on. Situations that are thrown at you can cause many Triggers. This is why Aftercare is so important. We all have issues and we have to set some Boundaries. It took me yrs to know what my Triggers are and how to avoid them as much as possible. It is like a spinning circle, changing and learning all the time, as we have more and more time in, we grow. There are days that are calm, like that Cruise you talk about, and other days you will be running for your life from that Mt-Lion. Ha!! Up where I live it is the Moose too.
Try to re-direct yourself as best that you can. Take a short walk, go for a drive, turn the music up, hit a meeting or call a clean friend. I like to study this in a more Scientific way too. It will take time for all those Neural Chems to balance back..Being Healthy and Eating Healthy is a great start. I think you are Sailing along just fine. YOU will be out of the Ocean and walking in the Sand soon! Keep on Stepping forward and up.
Bless
Vickie

[Vibe1luv]

My mental cravings have gotten worse as the day progresses. I keep getting a hot like anxiety over my body and then think norco would be exciting. So change my mind!!! I've been walking for an hour. Life is good. But a meeting is in order. No one can resist this escort myself.

[Jerry198]

you could be that 1-100 that gets off easy and I hope that's the case some individuals have very light WD's on low doses but like I said being in good shape and healthy helps big time but the sleep and stuff effects everyone but that to will pass best wishes!!!

[Vibe1luv]

This insomnia is the worst. And I know if I smoked a hit off the pipe I'd fall out in a few but I guess I want to feel. My stomach is a rumbling mess. And odd my butt hurts. Like up in there. Like constipation!?!? From the Imodium?? It's a gross feeling is for sure. So wide awake but totally at peace. I have no anxiety. So weird. It's like being on the Caribbean feeling. The only time in twenty years I had zero anxiety for eight days. And I feel that now. Really I'm blessed.
I gather the head ache and the stomach cramps and the insomnia are par for the course huh. I'd love to take a walk but I'm a little intimidated as I live in the country and we have mt lions. And I heard the chickens freaking out. Oh well I went to sleep early so I guess three hours is more than some times when I won't get but an hour a night. I had some vivid dreams. It was awesome. I'd stopped dreaming. In my wake and sleep I think the norco made me so depressed but I did t recognize it.
Blessings-

[Vibe1luv]

It's really odd to say I'm an addict. I came to the realization a month ago and I was like wtf!! I have a great husband. Healthy kids. Beautiful grandkids. And an ex who is an active addict. I've done alanon for years. Having been a codependent. My kids all went through alateen.
I was like "what are you doing!!!"
I could see the money I blew. I really had an eye opener when my blessed hard working self went to the Caribbean in July and then planned another trip for February. I thought omg I could blow the money we need for Vacay in a year if I carry on.
I'm strong. I've overcome a lot. I lost 120 pounds and learned a healthy way of life. Then set that back with a norco addiction. I made the choice to use and I'm making the choice not to use.
My dealers have been deleted. I have no doubt that after I feel strong enough I will come clean so to speak with my kids. I want them to know the dangers.
My husband is a god send. He does have some knowledge with na. He was mostly one who said like me one day "what am I doing" he admitted his problem to himself and his family and he never used again. He doesn't know the wd. He might forget it. I'm not sure u get meth wd. I've never used it. I don't even drink. Although o smoked a little herb to take away my rls and sleep the first two days off. I have my 215 for anxiety but I don't use marajuana but for a few weeks a year when I get insomnia. I've never felt like oh I need it. I use it for a few weeks then I'm done. IDK how u all feel about that. But I have no need for it tonight. I feel tired. I walked almost all day. Exercise is what I'll run to now instead of the hydro.
I'm so glad I posted this.
Blessings.

[Nighthawk61]

Hi there, Congrats on your decision to get clean. You're lucky to have a partner that understands what you'll be going through. Has your husband had any experience with NA when he quit 20 years ago. (yah him). ?

It sounds like he'd be happy to go to an open meeting with you. I think it would be a good idea for you to go to a women's closed meeting and listen and tell your story. Own the journey you're on, and be proud of being of sound mind enough to know to quit now, Addiction is progressive, so the fact that you are nipping your addiction now before you start to use more is wonderful.

I'm not sure but you might be a little worse for the wear for a couple of more days, but you can handle whatever comes. You sound like one of the lucky ones, having  a husband in the know about addiction. Keep positing and share in group. Addiction is addiction, and it's progressive, so please consider to take advantage of the "Program" (NA) and ask for a temporary sponsor.  Remember this is  a program of Principles and not Personalities, so it's not necessary to "love" your sponsor should you decide to get a number from someone willing to share with you what the program has to offer. I did for the fist couple of years. I hope that you have an easy time keeping clean. It might happen that way, but since you're going through this trouble, why not have your "program" in place to deal with any eventuality. (cravings, triggers etc.)

All the best, i'm here if you need to ever talk. I'm a women 54, who quit in 99 with my husband. All's well that ends well. I've never met an addict that regrets their long term sobriety. Add yourself to our ranks.

[Vibe1luv]

Yay. Thank you. Yes I'm in good physical shape. Does this help!? Coz I have no motivation now to workout. And the norcs had me depressed so I hadn't been hitting it like I use to. The world already looks brighter!! I saw my grandkids today and although I'm exhausted and blah I saw them through clear eyes. I cried. I think I should find a meeting however I have no physical or menta craving for the pills. Am I on a lower dose then a lot of stories I've read!? I've heard ppl say they took seven a day for a year and are miserable with wd. If it's not horrible physically will it get worse being as its day three!?!?

[Jerry198]

Hi and Welcome great to hear you have jumped off the Norco wagon and since you are basically a physical trainer per say then chances are your in good shape? so the physical part could be easier for you but the mental will still be there so make sure you have cut ties with the supply and for the RLS stuff check out some Highlands at the rite aid it will for the twitching then you will need a pile of vitamins and stay hydrated I prefer green Gatorade but the stuff is all the same just MAKE SURE to stay away from caffeine its a killer during recovery. and don't feel alone many of us have had trauma both mental and physical that we drowned in pain killers and in the end we still had the trauma plus became addicted to meds in the process so hang out with us and we will support you along the next part of your recovery......