Day 5, feeling down...

[sylvia21]

Today is my 5th day off vicodin & I'm feeling so depressed, sad, miserable and worthless. I still have no appetite and my sleep at night is basically ZERO. I had a long talk with my husband about how I am feeling (he already knows everything) and it made me feel better, but it's tough talking to someone who hasn't been in my shoes to know exactly how I feel. This is why I love this website, you ALL understand. And I can't stop thinking about are those stupid little pills...I keep thinking, if I just had one, I'd be okay...and I KNOW that isn't true. Being this is my 2nd ct off vicodin, I know 1 is never enough & it always leads to another, and then another. I just need to keep busy, but it's so hard because I work from home. I feel like all my thoughts are posessed around vicodin. Does anyone else feel this way? Or am I the only one? I feel like I'm literally going insane....someone please help me get through today, it's been the toughest one yet.

[broknbck]

well, i think it is all normal what you are feeling. with the pills we are always getting synthetic feelings of happy,well being. you know the endorphins being released. so now without the pills we have to make this happen naturally. i quit 3 years ago and at the time of quitting me and my kids planned lots of stimulating and exciting things to do to keep my spirits up. we traveled accross the country and visited some very exciting places and saw some of the most beautiful and hah, breath taking sights i have ever seen. it is all about stimulation of good feelings. i surrounded myself with fun, hilarious people and new experiences.
had so much fun quitting that i kept up with the search for new "stimulating" experiences. i am always meeting new people and going to new places. free stuff like state parks and got into hiking and seeing beautiful sights and it really has changed my life for the better.
gotta get those endorphins going again.

[Storme]

Hi Sylvia,

I know it seems so hard right now but every day gets a little better to handle. I promise you that. By the end of the weekend you will feel so much better and you will be so proud of yourself. Just hang on and keep taking deep breaths. Every minute, hour, day you resist that temptation, the temptation begins to fade and YOU get stronger.

You can do this. We all believe in you!

[quietllythinking]

Hey Sylvia, I know exactly where you are. Those little pills sure do have a voice. I am on day 10. Hope you got some rest and were able to keep your mind occupied. I sure do hope you have a better day tomorrow.

[worried878]

How did u feel while u were on the pills?

I know I felt defeated, ashamed and flat broke.  Give it some time....it cant be as bad as using

Tyrosine is a great NRG booster..not for those who r having high anxiety but works wonders for the lack of motivation and fatigue..which was my issue after the physical part was over...which was really nuttin cept a mild flu.

hang in there...educate urself...it helps!
The health pages r full of great info..the thomas recipe rox...combined with exercise to pump up the endorphins, i felt lots better

[jeffclowns]

hang in there Sylvia your already on day 5 by now almost day 6 ,it will start to get better just do whatever it take's (by any means necessary) to keep your mind and yourself away from pills and here in the very near future you will start feeling better ,you really will so stay strong and if that devil try's knocking on your door ,SLAM IT IN THE little bas tard's face ,say you will no longer have any control over me and I'm 6 days clean and i am NOT going to jeopardize my recovery because of U ,you dirty little demon named vicodin,I think that just might work ,maybe you should give that a try if it starts getting bad again,But i think you will start felling better real soon so keep it up and stay as strong as you can.god bless you.jeff.

[gnarly_1]

HI Sylvia....try not to get discouraged early on it gets better...I often say this is 1/3 physical and 2/3 mental I never mean it to play down the physical that part s ucks but rather to prepare you for the mental angle....the best cure for it is aftercare both N/A and A/A offer free programs you can google N/A meetings in your area to find one once there you can share your feelings with others that have been there or are there with you now it is very
uplifting to go to a meeting and get the weight off your chest you are caring even if you dont speek a word just lissen and you will get something out of it as addicts we need to change the very way we think to get well once you start living in recovery this gets a whole lot ezer
I wish you all the best in your recovery get plugged in somewhere good luck and God bless
have a clean and sober holiday......Gnarly  

[quitinoxys]

Sylvia you are doing great try to keep your mind occupied, watch a movie, take a walk with your man and just talk about anything. I know when I was at 5 days i felt the same way but I talked to my wife about everything I was feeling and it helped. Actually we talked about our relationship before I started taking oxys, the things we use to do together and the fun we use to have. It actually brought us closer together and not only that it passed the time. Oh btw you are not worthless just sick so don't be so hard on yourself. I am praying to God for you and asking him to fill your heart with happiness to help you get through all of this. I just finished praying so God should be fulfilling my prayer any minute so you should be happy any minute now. God Bless---Rick

[loulou100204]

You will start to feel better soon.  It's been about 3 weeks for me and I'm still feeling down at times.  But it honestly gets better everyday stay strong and proud you are doing this.  I crave here and there but I'm not going back.  I refuse to go back.  Hang in there 2 days and you will have a week.  I was proud at a week I won't lie I was proud at 5 days lol.    You made a good choice by stopping.  One day at a time.....

[Dav125]

Busy work for the mental wd's is about the best one can do during this phase of things. Set the goal to get thru the day and don't sit still too long. You'll start watching the clock which will never move fast enough..Try some soup for something to eat. Make a pot and get little bits here and there thru-out the day. Thats what I did as eating a real meal was out of the question. I just didn't have the energy to do that..Do try to move around periodically though. Even if just a short walk..Pretty soon the day will be over and a better one will start tommorrow...

[Toby1863]

Syl,

L-Tyrosine (1,000 mgs on an empty stomach 1st thing in the morning) and 50 mgs of 5HTP seemed to slaughter my anxiety this time around. My first 2 attempts I didn't try that route and the head games were rough. They were much easier this time. Send your hubby out to a health food store and he can pick them up for you. You can't get them at a CVS, Walgreens etc.

Try to get the L-Tyro with the vitamins C and B6 already in the tablet.

Take things as easy as you can. It's more important to beat this thing than absolutely ANYTHING else right now. You're really, really close. Good news in case you forgot....the weekend is coming up! Hang in there and keep your dukes up!
T

[sylvia21]

Thanks! I got a little bit of work done & now just gonna lay low for the rest of the day. I'm so exhuasted I can't imagine doing anything else! I think the emotional part is starting to kick in & this is the toughest part of wd. Any recommendations for the mental wd's?

[Toby1863]

Sylvia,

I hear you. I just had to kick myself in the pants to make some work related calls and I've been clean for awhile now. Remember, your on Day 5. You're just about to turn the corner. Don't expect to get to much done right now. That's normal.

The important thing is that your still clean. Keep fighting. In fact, fight even harder. You'll get thru this and by next week I'll guarantee you feel a whole lot better.