Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
Day 5 am i my own worst enemy?
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Day 5 am i my own worst enemy?

I got to the point where I realised that no time would ever seem like the right time to get off suboxone.  Its miserable and you never feel like going through with it.  But you know deep down you have to.  I listen to all the patients in a suboxone support group and they are all mislead.  A small percentage of them are people who belong on it but almost all of them have resigned themselves to lifelong dependence. I dont want to live like that.
         I have taken suboxone for almost 3 years now and i havent taken it for five days.  I believe i am in the stage where im waiting for withdrawal to hit.  I have a good doctor who has given me medicated assistance for w/d and I have tapered down to 2mg every 4 days.  I dont want to take it ever again.
        As the drug leaves me i feel life coming back to me smell, touch, taste.  I just wish w/d would hit so I could take my *** whippin and be done with it.  
           As I become more in touch with myself I Realise I have nothing but hate burried within me, unfortunately there is nobody to direct that hate at but myself.  Im tired of telling myself to wait to get off when Im "ready"
When is "ready", i realise there is no "ready" there is only now.  
      
3 Comments Post a Comment
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Avatar_m_tn
HI ......well it souds like you tapered down enough where it wont be to bad of a wirhdrawal we have had several members jump at 2mg and do fin only minor aches and pains no sleep for a wile and a bit of anxiety sio hopefully you get an ez withdrawal keep posting for support good luck and God bless.......Gnarly
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Avatar_m_tn
Im exactly where you are.ive been on subs for 2years 6 months.they have saved my life i truely believe that,but ive tapered right down to 0.4 and had enough.ive also been looking for that "right" time and its friday so ill be on that journey with you!
Cool post mate!!
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Avatar_m_tn
This is jsisgrmps
I just want to tell every one , I've got the up most respect for all of you! Maybe i shouldn't even be on here yet  because I haven't quit yet. I have been planning , and researching for a month now . I've set the date! I now from reading your posts that this will be the hardest thing I've ever done. I've been addicted to morphine for 4 years now. In the last couple of months I've also been doing a lot of bath salts and other designer drugs that have made me about lose my mind. I need to stop everything in the worst way and have all the right reasons to. My life is spiraling down hill fast. And I have a lot going for me. Well this is it, I'm doing it even if it kills me!  Thanks and good luck to all!
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