Day 9

Hey everyone, just wanted to say thanks to everyone who has helped me.  I know its only 9 days but I feel  much better, and im so glad i've decided to stop. I don't think  I ever would have if it wasn't for people telling me on here. At first, I think all I really wanted to do was stop so I could get "my tolerance back down" and then start doing it again, but now I really want to stop for good. No going back to it. I have started to really enjoy my life and I am starting to understand what everyone was telling me all along. I felt like I was blind then but I am glad I finally listened!!!! One question, I still have no energy, cannot sleep at night, and no appetite. I feel dizzy all day but I just cant eat and I think that contributes to the low energy. Can anyone out there tell me how long this might last? Also, to anyone out there thinking about stopping, you can do it!!! And once you do, you will feel so much better about yourself that you were able to fight through, and thats the best high you can get!!

[wings444]

Oh boy do I know how you feel...Im going crazy here too...the energy is totally GONE..
Keep posting these people are very helpful....BUt Im bad cause Im not convinced Im totally ok...How many were you taking??? I was taking 20 or more percs a day...but only for a few months...But they took a toll on my body bad!!
I wish you the best!!!
Good Luck DONT GIVE UP!!!

Wings

[Cassie415]

By the end,I was snorting about 160mg of oxycontin a day. I still am getting anxiety and depression, and then when I get teh depression I get the cravings, and I start sweating and I question why I would ever stop, but I think once the craving passes and you overcame it, it is just such a good feeling. Like for once I feel like I can be proud of myself for something and that brings me more happiness then the oxycontin. I'm not at all trying to say everything is great, because it is not, but the moments that are good just out do the bad ones...at least for now. Also, what's been really helping me with the energy is B-12 vitamin that is red and I put it under my tongue. I also get energy shots from jamba juice that has no caffeine and is just healthy energy. Stay strong, for once I finally get what everyone is saying, life is better sober!! lol

[SophieShine]

congrats on day 9!!! I am sooooooooo proud and happy for you sweetie, you're doing awesome. You passed this w-e w/o drugs when you had all the (bad) reasons to do it. You stood up for yourself instead of following the hurdle. You are so much stronger than you can imagine but you'll discover that, all in due time!!! LOL
Keep on rocking in the FREE world Cassie!!!
All my love and support.
xoxoxo. sophie.

[Cassie415]

Thank you sophie. You helped me see this and get to where I am right now. Thank you sooooo much!!!!

[voxxx]

Congrats on day 9 Cassie! Really once you get over that first week, its not too bad. I have a feeling the sleeplessness might hang on for awhile, but its a different kind of sleeplessness I have now. Before, I couldnt sleep because of RLS in my arms. But now, its more like im just not tired when its time to sleep. But it could be because my sleeping schedule is so messed up. Ill go to bed around 8-9am and wake up at 3-5pm. At first, I could NOT sleep. Then I started to be able to get a couple 2-3hr cat naps after like day 8. Now I can sleep for about 4-5hrs before I wake up (although this is with the help of a few alcoholic drinks). Yesterday I fell asleep around 8am and slept till ***gasp*** 5pm! Oh man that was soooo nice, even though I did use the help of some soma and klonopin. But I am just glad the RLS feeling is pretty much gone, not being tired isnt nearly as bad as being tired but unable to sleep.

[wings444]

Im so proud of you!!
Grats to you keep up the awesome work and Im so glad your feeling better!
Today I feel better then I have since I stopped too!!
Sober is better I have a great life too much to lose through drugs!!!

Talk soon
Wings

[Cassie415]

Thanks Voxx for the advice, the sleep is annoying but i've always been a night owl and i'm usually out pretty late so i'll just try andd do more at night now lol.

Wings444,
I'm really glad you see this and are feeling so much better today!! There will always be ups and downs but like people say on here its Mind over Matter. I wrote down a list in my cell phone of all the reasons I Wanted to Stop. Whenever I am out and about or even just at home and I start to think about really wanting to get some oxycontin, I read that list on my phone and it actually helps, because otherwise my brain will trick me into fogetting why I wanted to stop. Maybe that could help you? Either way, i'm very happy that youre feeling better today, have a great day!

[IBKleen]

I love the list idea!!!!! I totally forgot I had done that years ago and it does work. I used to also put sticky notes on my bathroom mirror to remind me every morning when I got up.

You are well on your way...keep up the good work!!!!