Depression after oxycontin withdrawl. What will help? SaMe?

[Going price of OC 40]

I heard about a drug called SaMe could help with depression, anyone have any expeience with this?

[IsaacHale]

I have been a OC addict for over a year, it started with 20s, then 40s, then 80s. The tolerance kept getting higher and I only used to sniff them but then started smoking them (chase the dragon method on tin foil with a tube). At that point I could do as many as 10 80s in a day. that is no typo. That is 800mgs of OC in a day. Sniffing that much woudl result in OD of course, but smoking you dont absorb as much but it is much more addictive. It took financial ruin for me to take steps to quit and now i am waking up from a bad dream into an even worse nightmare. I have no money, i have months of back rent, i am back on antidepressands and anti anxiety medication to deal with the mental and emotional problems from teh withdrawls. I have been suffereing severe depression with suicidal tendencies for years since my dad killed himself and i started using OC because it was an escape. a way to feel happy and socialize and talk to girls be be able to go out...now I cant go out of the house without it because of the withdrawls. I have to plan ahead everything I do to make sure I have enough to not get sick while I am out of away or at work. I know how hard it can be and this is the lowest and most difficult time in my life. harder than my dads suicide, harder than any relationship ending, harder than anything anyone can imagine unless they have gone through it. I dont have money for tratment so I researched methadone detox and am down to 20-30 mgs a day which is a VERY low dosage considering some addicts require up to 500mgs a day. It took me a long time to get to this point and while I am on zoloft which helped before with the depression, there are days i cannot go to work because i sit in bed for 6 or 8 hours staring at the ceiling and crying for no reason at all. I have lost control of my emotions and my body, as well as my entire life and I am trying desperately to take back control and even though i have broken the OC viscious cycle, the place I am in now is even worse and even harder and I keep slipping due to the depression and suicidal thoughts. I keep going back to the 80s and will smoke 3 or 4 of them to get those thoughts out of my head. I am in debt, I am broke, I may lose my apartment, my life is in tatters all because of OC and the escape I used it for. I could not deal with reality and smoked weed for a decade as my escape, had porblems with alcohol from time to time, but then OC took over every part of my life. I spent rent money to get more because i cannot function without it. And while I am off it now, the depression is unbearable. I am looking into psychological therapy, group sessions, support groups, alternative treatments but I am broke so I am limited to programs for the financially challenged. It is a long hard uphill battle ahead, the most difficult thing I have ever had to do by a LONG shot, but I know once I get through this and take my life back I can fix things. But the damage I have caused myself is already done and I am in a self induced financial ruin due to the addiction and the OC escape. I sincerely can relate to anyone who is having problems with OC and this drugs is the devil. If you are jsut starting, stop now. If its prescribed, ask for something else. I started out small, on 20s, and I always thought i could stop whenever but within the first 12 hours of trying to stop you will go thru withdrawls so bad you will pay anything to get more and make those feelings go away. It is a viscious terrible drug and I wish I had never EVER started using it because it has taking my life away from me, my happiness away from me, my will to live away from me. I think about killing myself every second of every day. every bus that drives by i want to step in front of. I had to sell my home defense handgun because i was too afraid i would use it on myself when i hit one of those lows in teh depression. I cannot walk across bridges because i am afraid i will impulsively jump off. You do not want your life to get to the point I am at and I would not wish this on my worst enemy. Please believe me that anyone who thinks they have control of it is only deceving themselves and I thought and believed the same thing for a long time. NEVER start with oxycontin. never ever ever ever. It is the devil.

[bmdad]

You posted to a old thread. You should start you own post that way it's dedicated to you. At the top of the page click the green box that says "ask a question". Sometimes when people post to a older thread it tends to get overlooked.
As far as withdrawals, you more than likely will feel them. It is nothing to be scared of. Granted, they are not fun but not impossible either. There are many on here that have been through them, getting ready to go through them, or going through them now. Lean on this forum for support. There are some amazing people on here that will not judge, just help you fight through this. There is no painless way to get through withdrawals. It just takes time. The worst of the physical withdrawals are usually over with by day 5 or so. It's such a short amount of time to be free of addiction. Come here and post often.
You can make it through this. If you need anything, please let me know.
Best of luck to you!
Brian

[sdlang24]

I went to rehab 3 months ago and just recently relapsed its been two maybe 3 weeks and I've been doin between 40and 80 mg everyother day to every day ..... I gunna stop tomoro does any one think I'm gunna withdrawl bad .. Casue I'm scared and don't wanna go thro it again ...

[SophieShine]

Hi and welcome to the forum! you have posted on an old tread and your question might pass by unnoticed.... Please past it and start your own... This place is a life savior, you'll be surprised how much feed back you can get.
Hang in there, you can do this.
Best of luck
sophie

[imhurt]

for the last 25 years ive had DDD in my whole spine and fibromyalgia since i was 14 years old im 41 now i have suffered most my life even got to the point where i didnt tell the doctors im in pain. but then my cervical went stenotic on me with many bony spurs all around up and down even some disk tissue broken off causing the pain to even go further. i couldn't sit up anymore. then i tried and went to the doctor which diagnosed me from first sight. as i gave him my history and told him my symptoms he gave me lyrica and lortab and and percocet for times in severe pain that the lortab didn't help. i got better and finally was able to even ride a bike again. i had a life. for years before him i had seen many doctors and they all thought i had a small case of DDD and depression i never could take the anti depressants they made me have nightmares and slept constantly tryed all anti inflammatory there is on the market im allergic to them and have scars from them meaning ear blown and sinus problems list goes on. anyway ive moved to virginia from houston and all doctors say sergery or no meds and so now i will be abruptly taken off my meds cus i cant find a doctor. that will just take over my former doctor they wont give me my meds im afraid can anyone tell me what can i do ive been to 7 doctors and none will treat me as my old doctor did they want to give me steroids which i took a week pack of and had 2 heart attachs thaats what steroids and nonsteroidal medications do to me i dont think that sergury will help and i think they will make my fibro even worse which is way at 12 pain now  please if i get off all my meds what will happen and if  just stop taking them could i have a stroke or a heart attach is there something i can take that will help with pain the doctors can give me to help me with pain that will help with bodies addiction and my pain

[oxysufferer]

To Michael who wrote in April of 2000 I wonder where you are now its been over 9 years. have you gotten clean? are you still taking opiates? If your there please reply. I am another Micheal. everything you said sounds like me right now. I can handle the pain the nausea the headaches and body aches that come with withdrawals. Its the depression that keeps bringing me back to using. I have been on oxycontin for 7 years now. i am taking between 100 and 1400 mgs a day. I get a prescription for these monthly and are paid for by insurance. It costs me nothing. I can't stand the way I feel when coming off of them. I don't want to be a slave to them. I want off!
I tried suboxone and it worked great! except I got severely constipated. and depressed in the evenings. the days were fine. The problem with them was they make it difficult to get them. you have to go to a pharmacy each morning to get your dose and 2x weekly you have to see the doc for a urine test. The clinic is 30 miles a way so it is not possible to continue for long, it gets to be too much, then I miss a day, then its two, I take an oxy for the withdrawals and before you know it I am back on 140 mgs of oxy's a day. If they would just give you a script for a month like the oxys I would have no problem staying on them. They just make it so difficult to recover.

[alisamazing]

For all of you who are feeling like there is no hope and that without the opiates life just is too hard to cope with I understand and have been in your shoes.. Almost two years ago I would get up take my percocet and feel wired for a couple hours but as soon as they wore off I felt the need to keep taking them.. I got really bad that I was taking oxycotin and getting them off the street.. To mk a very long story short I went to my doctor who repeatedly told me I too needed anti-depressants and things would be fine in a few months..then it told her I wanted to stop the opiates once and for all and I needed help.. So she referred me to a doctor that had a license to prescribe suboxone.. The day I got my script was the first day of my new life.. I have not used opiates since the day I took my first pill.. I also started lexapro 6 months after the suboxone and I can finally feel a difference in my everyday life.. I hope any of you can use my experience and my advise and ask your doctor about the suboxone.. Its a lifesaver.. Good luck to all of you.. Don't ever give up

[alisamazing]

For all of you who are feeling like there is no hope and that without the opiates life just is too hard to cope with I understand and have been in your shoes.. Almost two years ago I would get up take my percocet and feel wired for a couple hours but as soon as they wore off I felt the need to keep taking them.. I got really bad that I was taking oxycotin and getting them off the street.. To mk a very long story short I went to my doctor who repeatedly told me I too needed anti-depressants and things would be fine in a few months..then it told her I wanted to stop the opiates once and for all and I needed help.. So she referred me to a doctor that had a license to prescribe suboxone.. The day I got my script was the first day of my new life.. I have not used opiates since the day I took my first pill.. I also started lexapro 6 months after the suboxone and I can finally feel a difference in my everyday life.. I hope any of you can use my experience and my advise and ask your doctor about the suboxone.. Its a lifesaver.. Good luck to all of you.. Don't ever give up

[worried878]

jessica..this is an old post..u will get more response if u post a new question  (:

[jessicagrace]

I have been in may car accidents, from which I suffered very severe injuries (you can read my profile if you want to know them.)  I have been prescribed 3 * 80 mg oxycontins and 4* 30 mg roxycodone a day for over a year now.  My mother believed that I was abusing pain medication, because after my most recent accident I was unable to work like I always had. Despite my families knowledge of my medical history, they convinced my ex to take me to court so that he could have full custody of my daughter who I had been taking care of by myself sicne she was 18 months old (she is now five.) I have done spinal decomprssion, accupunture, I have an inversion table in my home.  My doctor wrote a note for me to take to court saying that at no time did he believe I was abusing or misusing my medication, I had several credible witnesses testify that I was a great and very capable mother.  I lost full custody of my daughter, I now see her 8 days a month, I fear that the only way I will be able to get her back is if I no longer need medication.  With out telling my dr. I have been weening my self down and am now two weeks with out it I have been taking a little suboxone here and there and welbutrin twice a day.  But I can't seem to get up to do anything I feel like I am stuck on my couch.  I am obbing whie I type this I am so scared that I am going to loose my daughter, I reslly don't feel like I have anything left to live for. I don't know what to do, please help.

[Beaten]

i've been on the drug effexor for about 3 years due to depression. Then my b/f and i became addicted to oxycontin we quit and after we did he experienced sever depression. I was ok though becus of the effexor. in my personal experience its an absolutly wonderful drug.

[emanforda]

I am a long time opiate addict.  I have been trying to get clean sense 2005.  it's been nothing but rehab, programs and sober living houses for the past three years.  The longest i have been clean is about six or seven months.  this last time i managed to stay clean for three months.  I put myself in a long term program in idaho, which is far from home.  The only reason I made it three months is because I had no money,  no where to go, and no way to get there.  I had no choice but to endure the panic, the raw anxiety,   the extreme discomfort that it is to be clean.  Normally i would drink hard alcohol if for whatever reason i didn't have oxy, which is how i spent the two weeks after i got out of rehab before going to the program in idaho and i don't even like booze.  That three months was aganizing, i felt like a mental patient.  Everyone called me doom because i would go through periods of hopless debilitating depression.  If i wasn't utterly depressed, i was super irritable, aggitated and afraid like someone who has post traumatic stress disorder.  It was  like this for the whole three months, moods would fluxuate with intensity.  Most of the time my cravings for oxycontin were intense.  I wanted desperatley to feel normal.  It would get worse, and get better, and get worse, which wore down my patients.    At the worst times,  i would burry my head in my hands, wishing that i could flip a swich to turn off my concsiousness.  I didn't really understand that this was all opiate related because weeks had gone by with no sign of improvement.  Spring break was coming up, i was to go home for two weeks and come back.  I knew i had given up because i was just as uncomfortable after three months clean as i was day two.
I relapsed at home, and it was good to feel like my old self again.  Self ehestiem, energy, motivation, contentment, ambition, and all the other wonderfull things we all take for granted were back.  I fell in love with oxycontin once again.  I wanted to go back to the program and reintroduce mysellf again as me instead of the doom character they knew so well.  I never went back, and i was back up to five, six 80's a day.  My relapse lasted a short month until it stopped working, my tolerence was sky high, and i was broke, desperate and spiritually rottin, and desperate for help once again.  I went to see a detox doctor who put me on seboxone which i had been on before many times but had been taken off of it to quickly.  That made sense to me.  Seboxone is a brand of bupinorphene. Basically it's an opiate blocker, so when you take it, your receptors are occupied so your brain isn't screaming for opiates.  It significantlly reduces cravings and withdrawl symptoms.
The good news is that it acts like a cast for the brain which was recently discovered.  So your brain can return to normal and in the mean time you don't have to suffer as much.  A lot if people think that it just delays the recovery process and that your just continuing your addiction but it turns out that thats not true with seboxone.  It is with methadone.  Anyway i hope to stay clean for good this time and my heart goes out to the rest of you.            

[GoingToMakeIt]

Great post. Try putting this in a new "Post A Question" button. Otherwise it will be wasted on this old post from 2000. (MedHelp puts it back into archives)

[ready2help]

Hi Everyone:

I have read your posts with interest and compassion. I would like to throw a few thoughts out - please do not take offense - I have much compassion for your dilmmas.

1. Bypass all these "docs" and establish a good working relationship with someone CERTIFIED in addiction medicine (you can go to the website ASAM.org or get a referral from a reputable addiction treatment org in your community)
2.  all the talk about depression and anxiety - - you are not unique, not any of you - these are typical addiction issues. Addicts always think they are "different" - nope, you've all burned up the pleasure centers in your brain. GOOD NEWS: It is repairable most of the time but that takes time (back to #1)
3. you can't expect to give up your best friend, the love of your life, your mistress....and not replace it with something - that's why going to 12 step, really immersing yourself in it can save your life. It's a time to grieve a huge loss. The only person that can understand what you're going through is another recovering person.
4.  For those of you discussing chronic pain - if you work closely with a bonafide pain specialist, you can overcome this.  If your "pain specialist" is treating you with boatloads of opiates, benzos, and other sedatives, run! A true pain doc would never do this - they know that people with chronic pain are actually made WORSE with long term narcotic use. Narcotics actually cause pain! Read any current work in the field and see for yourself
5.  In the end, it's about getting your own "treatment team" together and taking suggestions from truly qualified people. You need comprehensive treatment to manage addiction, not just pharmaceuticals.
6.  Just to clarify: I support the use of antidepressants, suboxone, anything that is an adjunct in a treatment plan
7. Talk to people that are having success in their recovery and ask how they do it day-to-day. Take direction from the winners
8. Good luck to all!!! - stick with the winners - get support - EVERY ONE OF YOU can get off this merry-go-round if you stop "doing it your way" and surrender....a common mantra is "your best thinking got you here" so listen up!
ALL THE BEST TO YOU ALL!

[GoingToMakeIt]

Welcome to the forum. You can look at the health Pages on the right of page. Look up the Thomas recipe and the amino acid posts. there is info to help you. also try posting on a new post. This one is from 2000.

[jeff_]

ive been clean 7 days..i was sniffing about 3 80mg oxycontins a day for about a year..i have a bad case of depression and i dont give a **** about anything anymore..nothing makes me happy and i am about 2 seconds away from making that call to get oc's..any1 know a good way to get through this depression cuz i feel if i go any longer it cood get dangerous

[Frank]

I found a very helpful site today www.OxycontinNightmare.homestead.com

[paula]

I was to on Paxil and found it didn't work for me.  Be very carefull when you stop taking it.  It caused very bad side effects for me.  i am on Effexor now and I also find this dosen't help.  I have also been on prozac and zoloft.  I hope there will be a medication that will work one day soon.

[Leann]

Every reply I just read sounded like the thoughts that run through my head on a daily basis!  I started out having kidney stones @ the age of 17 and was given Demerol, Darvocet,Percocet,
Zydone and Vicodin ES..   I got through that episode but then when I was 23 I had a severe car accident that almost killed me. Of course you know i was in a great deal of pain and needed relief one way or another.  I am currently taking Paxil 40mg and it  really has made me have better thoughts and ideas during the day but its the nightime that I do not like to deal with and I always start worrying before anything even happens....& sometimes never happens. I also have taken the ultram and that really does get rid of the pain.  Anyone offered an ultram RX should atleastgive it a try.I am still fighting the battle but I am not sure if that is such a good idea the way my back and legs hurt.  I really am not ready to go off of it yet.  I am 2 scared and uncomfortable to quit taking mine now cause i do not want to be in pain anymore.  The weird thing is .......I actually feel like I am as closer to normal than I ever have been! I get more things done around the house etc.  The pain has been taken away long enough for me to do what I need to do!!!   LEANN

[Brian to Sick and Scared]

It is critical for you to give your body time to heal.  Don't expect to feel "normal" in a few days, it will take longer.  Of course you feel normal when you use the narcotic because your opiate receptors are now oriented toward receiving the narcotic each day.  Furthermore, your brain levels of certain "pleasure" chemicals such as dopamine are not currently at a proper level. Your focus right now needs to be the old "one day at a time."  As you said, the worst of the physical withdrawal is over.  Now comes the hardest part, the emotional/psychological effects.  The best way to help yourself is to join NA or AA so you can have the support of others like yourself who have been there and survived.  In addition, the positive message and hearing people who talk about how their lives are SO much better in recovery is critical.  Regardless of why you initially started the narcotics, I think you now know you have a SERIOUS addiction which will require treatment.  Please get the help you need.  Finally, with respect to the chronic back pain, there are many treatments which do not involve narcotics and you should speak to your doctor or a specialist about these.

[Kay]

I have been on Oxycontin for 2 years 30 mg 3x's per day, that is the prescribe dose. There are some days that I use 80 mg 6 or 7 times a day. I don't shoot oxy's but I do snort them. I have been off of them for four days now and I feel like I am dying. The withdrawl sysmptoms are awful. The Chills, severe leg cramps, the shits, stomach cramps, I feel the worst is over at this point but I am very weak. My husband is not very supportive and that makes things even tougher. I pray to God that in a few days I will fell normal again. It seems when I take oxy's they make me feel normal. When I don't take them I feel empty or loss. besides they really motivate me when I take them. I have chronic back pain and that was the reason they were first prescribed for me. But now if I can't get them from 3 or 4 of my different doctors, I buy them off the street for a buck a mg. like I said I have clean four days and I hope I can do it.
thanks
Kay

[Bonnie]

Michael I hear what your saying about the opiates getting you through the depression.Iwas on meds.for my depression long before i was put on percocet for chronic pain.I feel betterfrom my depression only when i am on the percocet.I am also on xanax,and oxycontin.I am so affraid of what will happen when i try to get off all the pain meds.How much worse will my depression be.I am a different person on the opiates.I have heard of depression after detox from drugs but what do you do when the deprssion was pre-existing.I dont see much light at the end of the tunnel.I am28 yrs.old,married with 3 boyswho need me now,so if anyone can suggest something I can possibly try please let me know.                                          sincerely,Bonnie

[Jack Ulundy]

I also suffer from chronic pain. I was taking tons of vicodin each day for that reason. When I did stop, it was the pain that always brought me back to them. I found a smart doctor and he switched me to Oxycontin. Any MD worth his weight know that this is the way to go. I lead a very successful lif eon them and do not have any more pain. My cravings are all gone. Short term opiates should never be given if you are going to take them longer than 2 weeks

[Brighty to Phil]

Phil... I think you really ought to delte my replies to Kacey also. There are some places here where I am replying to Kacey but there is no way for other fourm participants to see what it is I have replied to since his/her comments are missing.. so it does seem unusual or misleading. Thanks.