Detoxing Alone

[Detox_Damsel]

Hello Everyone,
I'm new here, and this is my 1st post. To make a really long story short, the only Doctor I had for the last 16 years got sick, and dismissed me from her care (but refused to refer me to another Doctor). She dismissed me when she was prescribing me 44 pills...a DAY!! Highlights include Valium (6 a day), Mogadon (4 a day), Morphine (30mg 4 a day & 60 mg 3 a day), Percocet (6 a day) 2 anti depressants (Remeron & Wellbutrin) and a few other things.

Last time I tried to detox (in her care), I lost almost all of my hair and became an anorexic weighing 68 pounds (as I had NO appetite to the point where I couldn't even force feed myself). The only reason I didn't die was because I started taking the bloody pills again. Due to unfortunate circumstances, I am completely alone and can not check into some sort of detox clinic as I have no one to care for my beloved pet. Nor am I able to leave my home on a daily basis.

I have NO idea how to properly detox from one medication, let alone 14. I am on day 53 of my self imposed detox and have gone from taking 44 pills a day, to 12 and stopped taking morphine altogether 3 weeks ago. I've been  drinking a lots of water (mixed with lemon juice & cayenne pepper). I have been going threw a hell I wouldn't wish on anyone, but now, acute, severe, depression has turned me into a vegetable that has no interest in doing anything. I just cry all day and occasionally get some sleep. And again have NO appetite and have lost 46 pounds already. I am scared to death due to what happened last time. I don't understand why this is happening as I am still taking my anti depressants. And I almost went into shock when I got my period (for the 1st time in about 8 years) a few days ago.

Does anyone have ANY advice on what kinds of things I should do while I'm detoxing to make it easier or safer?  Does anyone have any idea as to what other problems I will face as I continue my detox? Does anyone know why I am suffering such acute depression even though I'm taking 2 antidepressants? Should I be trying to flush them out of my system too? Any ideas as to how I can stimulate my appetite?

[Holliee]

Hello Why in the world did your doctor dump you,. She must be a cold hearted B!tch!!!

[Charetti]

I am in Canada and here we have various services we can access such as Mental Health services and Addictions services. Is there something like that where you are?  They might be able to help you get a doc and/or be accessed by a psychiatrist.  Your antidepressants arent working but be very careful about coming off them.  They might not be addictive but they can have some pretty odd side effects when you stop, including suicial ideation.  So be careful and find the right support.  Pull out the phone book and start phoning around.  

Best of luck and stay connected here.

[GottaQuit]

Hi...
Just wanted to check in with you and see how you're doing ... And to let you know we all care about you and want to help you in any way we can.  Please remember to keep posting here -- whether it's an update or questions or for support.  That way other members who may not have been around at the time of your original post will learn about your situation and have an opportunity to respond with helpful recommendations and very importantly, to support you!

Hope you're doing okay -- We look forward to hearing from you again soon!

All my best!
XOXO

[dochollywood]

Can you at least try to do some nutritional drinks (ensure) or try to make your own shakes with protein powder and fruit, ice cream or yogurt and try to force yourself to drink them?

The ER is ill equipped to help you unless they have an addiction ward.  Could you try to see an addiction specialist as an outpatient?  Or a pain clinic?  If it's a legit pain clinic, they are well experienced with addiction.

Don't you have anyone who could watch your pet?  R u all alone?

[nuredshuz]

Hey there, wow I am sorry you are going thru all of this! your doctor is an idiot! I think the other posters are right in advising you to go to the ER or to another doctor.. its not even close to ethical what your doctor has done to you! the amount of pills (s)he had you on was obserd then to just dump you is just terrible... you really do need some medical intervention here... your body is in shock... you are doing great and I commend you for doing what you have on your own!!! I couldnt imagine detoxing from all of that on my own.. please seek out another doctor who can help you either by weaning you from some of the meds or switching you or something... its just wrong what your doctor did to you... best of luck to you!!

[prayformetoo]

Our Prayers are with you and I know God can heal you. You can do this. Your doing the right thing.
Steve

[NorcoQueenoftheUniverse]

I agree with GottaQuit.. in that your Anti depressants AREN'T working because your system is SOOOO confused...

You most definately NEED to get an MD involved with your recovery process...
But.. you need to be honest and up front with everything in order for them to help you..

Be safe... PLEASE get the help you need... and most of all.... GOD BLESS YOU!

[GottaQuit]

Hi
First of all, you've come to the right place, welcome to our community. And because you're here, you'll find you are NOT alone... you can come here for support any time day or night w/out leaving your beloved pet (dog, cat, or what??)

You're on pretty heavy doses of many narcotics that need to be sorted out. And am guessing by the dosing that you've been taking this stuff for many years and have built up a high tolerance to them, which is gonna make this a rocky road, but it CAN be done.

Which 12 meds are you still using, what dose, and for what?  (And it's okay to say you're taking them because you're addicted or dependent on them -- we all understand!)

You cannot just stop taking Benzo's ... unless you're under a doctor's care, you need to taper off them gradually or you risk seizures.  Your antidepressents aren't working because your system is so confused with all of these substances that they don't stand a chance to be effective.

Many of us here, including me, are or have been addicted to many different Narcotics and Benzo's at the same time, so hang in there. Your best bet for success is to get a doctor who will help you thru all this.  Is that an option for you?  Good, honest, compassionate doctors DO exist... but you HAVE to be honest about your use so they can help you.  And please be honest with us here, too.

PLEASE let us know more about your situation and how you're doing... it can be scarey sometimes to open up to people you don't know --yet-- but you will find that we are all fighting the same battle with varying circumstances and are here to help each other!

Keep posting -- We're all on your side!!

XOXO

[losfeliz1970]

i would go to a doctor today...right now.  go the emergency room if you have to.  tell them you are not eating, write down on a piece of paper all the drugs you were taking hand it to them, you need to see a pych for your depression meds and a regular doc for your detox.  don't gamble with your life.  go now!  call 911 if you have to

[kiylen]

If you can, go to the emergency room if you have to.  If you get malnutrished (sp?) that alone can kill you.  You are doing great so far but you really need some extra help.  There are things that are not addictive that can get you over this easier.  Even if you don't have insurance, emergency room's are required to see you.  Please get some help before it gets out of hand again.  Sometimes it's a battle that just can't be fought alone.  I'm thinking of you...

[dellta]

Hi the best advise i can give ya is stay hydrated try to eat and just give yourself the chance to recover and see where you stand with yourself without pill after pill after pill you mite be suprised that your normal happy loving person that has had some bad breaks in life but you must care for yourself in order to want to stop its yourself telling you to please let yourself just be you  good luck to you and if you need a freind im here for ya hang in there it does get better i truley does ...

[wannabeclean2]

Sounds like you need to see doctor, i would get checked out and be completly honest with the er doctors.