Does it ever get better?

[Icka]

Hi guys! It has been a long time since I wrote last. Almost a year and a half ago I worte about my boyfriend being addicted to morphine and Oxeys. I have tried everything to help him including getting him into rehab, which he only stayed 2 weeks. Oh by the way he shoots the dope if that makes any difference. Anyway I decided I was done after all the things he stole from me and everything he put me through, got him out of my hose and out of my life and found out I was pregnant. I want nothing more then the man that I have been in love with for all these years to be there for me and the baby but is he ever going to get better? Also I can never tell when he is high, I have never used myself and have a hard time telling the difference, if anyone can help let me know thanks!

[LateAugust]

Here are a few signs of oxy use:      the pupils of their eyes  are extremely retricted, they do not dialate even when in a darker area,    it is a very expensive habit  and will do anything to have the monies to buy the drugs....  are all of his pay checks accounted for??  do you or anyone he is in contact with have anything stolen  ie  laptop,  jewelry,  cash,  bank cards, checks from your wallet/purse?   They will lie when there is absolutely no reason ,  lie about the silliest thing,  because 99% of everything they say is a lie. My daughter when really active is extremely pale,  picks at her face a lot,  itchy, extreme mood swings,  vomiting after use.....   eating habits  change to sweets.

   I am the mom of an oxy user that lives with me......   until your SO quits the only thing I can tell you for 100% certain is your life will be hell,  and you need to focus on yourself and the life you have created inside of you.        I am sorry if this seems harsh,  but living with an oxy addict is more harsh than any words you will ever read.....  something you truly can't know unless you have lived it.    My daughter is doing a bit better    she is on suboxone  and still relapsed   on Monday she goes back into treatment for the 3rd time.

It is a long road to recovery, hopefully knowing he will have a child soon will motivate him in getting the help he needs for a healthy and productive life.  I wish you the absolute best.

[Icka]

Thanks for the advice but I have looked for both of those and he never nods off. EVER! His arms look a lot better so I don't know maybe he is shooting up somewhere else? How is it that he is so good at hiding it! Does he love me or just hell I don't know! The last 2 years of my life have been hell why can't I get away????????????

[cathy5841]

OMG addicts are notorious for looking in your eyes and swearing they quit and they hate drugs...while they are high.  i know i am one.  if he is shooting oxy he will nod off...like falling asleep and then wake up real fast with a lil jump.  he should also have needle marks on his arm.  i am so sorry you are having to deal with this...but...congrats on the baby.

[Icka]

Thank you so much for your help. I think I really need to go to alonon. I have always been suggested it but never really thought I needed it. But I suppose that makes me no better huh? I have tried to get away from him but je promisies me the world and I love him more then anything. Why would anyone want that over their family? And can someone look you dead in the eyes and say they quit and really didn't? And again how can I tell if he is high. And most important to me how do I just stop loving him?

[sway1]

when i was shooting up, i was in "super self destruct" mode. your man is not your man right now. he is someone else. i would try and concentrate on yourself and your family. if he spent that long in a rehab, then he knows HOW to go about getting help. until he decides, its a crapshoot. emotionally extending yourself to him right now would only cause you more harm. i wish you the best.   sway

[gizzy32]

Your boyfriend is going to need help and quitting rehab is not the way to go. I don't know much about shooting up, but you need to focus on you and your child right now. I know it sounds easy for me to say, but addiction can bring down families with them and cause so much pain and your life is worth more. I hope he gets the help he needs. Sara is right, if there are any alanon meetings in your area they would be very helpful to you. i will give you a link here for it.

http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/english.html

[dominosarah]

You are in a tough spot right now.  Until your boyfriend wants to quit nothing you can say or do will change his mind.  He has to be the one that decides.  Have you thought about going to Alanon??  Addiction affects the whole family.  Hopefully he will wake up and see what is going on.  All the best and enjoy that new baby you are going to have!!!!  sara