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Friday night check in -- how's everyone doing? Progress? Stumbles? Lessons learned?
Hi All! As we have a lot of new folks, I thought this might be a good way for us all to 'check in' and 'meet' one another and stuff. Jessica
I am on my 5th day of w/d from 15 years of Rx codeine. It was a hell week for me...all the symptoms.
Today, half the symptoms have dissapated...hopefully, for good.
What can I expect in the next week...and, what should I look out for that could cause a setback? Thank you, and...
Happy Trails
George
Today, half the symptoms have dissapated...hopefully, for good.
What can I expect in the next week...and, what should I look out for that could cause a setback? Thank you, and...
Happy Trails
George
WOW. Yeah, I never understood the whole gotta admit your powerlessness before you could get better. That seemed like the most ridiculous thing for so long. Until one day I got it. Just got it. Not bc I"m so profound or smart, but bc God graced me with that insight. And it is through this humility that I am finding my way. Hugs! Jessica
Well - Rich is at least now in a safe place. His wife came home in the early evening hoping things had gotten better and they had gotten worse. It became apparent that he was unlikely to live through the night if left to his own devices - he was taking handfulls of hydro on top LOTS of booze and benzos. When she got there, with the 2 kids, he was stumbling around naked, with his own sh*t all over him and all around the house - he was about completely out of it and passed out on the floor within minutes.
It took a couple of hours to get the machinery of gov't moving, but with some moral support from a guy that Rich helped get sober 15 years ago and me, she took out a Mental Hygiene Petition on him. Three marked Sheriffs' vehicles got to his house about 9:00. They called form EMT backup and he was finally taken off to the psych ward in an ambulance.
I don't feel too bad for Rich. He didn't die and he's now in a safe place where he'll have a chance. I wish he didn't have so much fing knowledge about the disease. I don't think you can win with knowledge - it's good to have, but it doesn't help all that much w/o surrender. The losses, humuliation and dispair Rich will know in the coming days, weeks and months MAY be what it takes to force the necessary surrender.
Surrender is the toughest thing to do. It's even a bit tough to describe. It's what I prayed for most every night for the 4 months of my last rehab. I was scared that it was not possible for me to do. I was even more scared that I would THINK I had when I really haden't. What I specifically prayed for was that God would sift through me "molecule-by-molecule" and destroy each and every pocket of resistance in me - ESPECIALLY the ones I wasn't aware of.
According to Rich, he hadn't surrendered. At the Saturday morning meeting where he and I usually see each other, Rich would talk how he knew that what he had long been engaged in was "mere complaince" - following orders as to conduct, much like a prisoner might follow the instructions of a guard. He would say that he could "sense that mere complaince isn't enough," but that he didn't "seem able to take whatever additional step is needed for surrender."
I think I'll start up my molecule-by-molecule again tonight - I REALLY do not want to put myself, my family or my friends through what a relapse by me would be like. Tonight was a good reminder of what it says in How it Works, "that probably no human power could have relieved or [addiction]," but "that God could and would if He were sought."
It took a couple of hours to get the machinery of gov't moving, but with some moral support from a guy that Rich helped get sober 15 years ago and me, she took out a Mental Hygiene Petition on him. Three marked Sheriffs' vehicles got to his house about 9:00. They called form EMT backup and he was finally taken off to the psych ward in an ambulance.
I don't feel too bad for Rich. He didn't die and he's now in a safe place where he'll have a chance. I wish he didn't have so much fing knowledge about the disease. I don't think you can win with knowledge - it's good to have, but it doesn't help all that much w/o surrender. The losses, humuliation and dispair Rich will know in the coming days, weeks and months MAY be what it takes to force the necessary surrender.
Surrender is the toughest thing to do. It's even a bit tough to describe. It's what I prayed for most every night for the 4 months of my last rehab. I was scared that it was not possible for me to do. I was even more scared that I would THINK I had when I really haden't. What I specifically prayed for was that God would sift through me "molecule-by-molecule" and destroy each and every pocket of resistance in me - ESPECIALLY the ones I wasn't aware of.
According to Rich, he hadn't surrendered. At the Saturday morning meeting where he and I usually see each other, Rich would talk how he knew that what he had long been engaged in was "mere complaince" - following orders as to conduct, much like a prisoner might follow the instructions of a guard. He would say that he could "sense that mere complaince isn't enough," but that he didn't "seem able to take whatever additional step is needed for surrender."
I think I'll start up my molecule-by-molecule again tonight - I REALLY do not want to put myself, my family or my friends through what a relapse by me would be like. Tonight was a good reminder of what it says in How it Works, "that probably no human power could have relieved or [addiction]," but "that God could and would if He were sought."
Hello Jess!
My name is Ray, I am a computer programmer, opioid addict, and I am calling in from my beautiful home city of Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada!
Progress? Always. Stumbles? Oh, yes. Lessons Learned? Progress is "stumbly". :)
Nice to meet you, and everyone else who is chomping at the bit to post in this thread! :D
Peace folks!
Ray
My name is Ray, I am a computer programmer, opioid addict, and I am calling in from my beautiful home city of Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada!
Progress? Always. Stumbles? Oh, yes. Lessons Learned? Progress is "stumbly". :)
Nice to meet you, and everyone else who is chomping at the bit to post in this thread! :D
Peace folks!
Ray
I am foing food toda. th dais gits beter n beter al da tim. Da 6 fo me. The witdrawels is gohn. No cravens it al.
JEO
JEO
For me day 1 2&3 were not bad days.the worse day was day 4 had to be hospitalized only thing I could think was how much I was on anyone else have same effect
I hate to burst your bubble since it looks likes maybe you are doing well. Imust ask, tho, are you sure you didn't have a stroke or a massive head trauma in addition to the w/ds?
Hi yall! I am still hanging in here with the first signs of wd's. My head is pounding and I feel a little weak. My body hurts a little but I am trying to keep my spirits up for my daughter. I did take a mobic earlier. This was given by my ortho b/c of swelling in my ankle where I had surgery over the holidays. Is this bad??? I am not sure what it really is. I get tired of reading the warnings. I am a little hyperconed. I need some answers. I found some Motrin 800's in my drug stash closet. Can I take that since I took the mobic at 5:30 PM EST?
C.,
I am not sure who Rich (R.) is but it sounds like you are knee-deep in his relapse. (I mean in so far as your concern and efforts for him -- not in a 'negative way'.) You are in my thoughts -- share any time. Jessica
I am not sure who Rich (R.) is but it sounds like you are knee-deep in his relapse. (I mean in so far as your concern and efforts for him -- not in a 'negative way'.) You are in my thoughts -- share any time. Jessica
Hiya! Hope everyone is well -- at least well enough as could be expected. I am on Day 12 ... brief synopsis of the w/d (always helps me to hear others' accounts) ... Day 1,2, and 3 were very acute with w/d symptoms. Strangely, each day brought very distinct different symptoms (??).
Day 1 was predominantly deep sorrow, the other two days were others although I can recall which and in which order (anxiety, dred, etc.) Day 3 I DID have my first 'outing' and was actually able to pay attention to something OTHER THAN the w/d (BTW: did you guys know that, even when we are w/d'ing life doesn't stop and wait?! Isn't that the dambest thing??) Day 4 I had my first good night's sleep -- still took awhile to fall asleep but slept long 9although on BOTH Day 4 and Day 5, I woke up at about 3 AM and couldn't go back to sleep until 5 but then I went back to sleep). Saturday was good but Sunday I started to feel a bit down again and this lasted several days. Today is the best day so far -- energy returning, sense of humor returning, feeling 'real again'.
Part of what I do is work with animals. I always felt like the drugs helped me to do MORE with them and keep things in 'tip top' shape. I realized today, though, as I hung out with them and was actually 'there' that it was very different from the times in which I was 'high happy'. I'm not saying they could tell nor did I ever keep things less than perfectly clean -- I just noticed how different is was to be 'present' without the drugs. In a good way.
Day 1 was predominantly deep sorrow, the other two days were others although I can recall which and in which order (anxiety, dred, etc.) Day 3 I DID have my first 'outing' and was actually able to pay attention to something OTHER THAN the w/d (BTW: did you guys know that, even when we are w/d'ing life doesn't stop and wait?! Isn't that the dambest thing??) Day 4 I had my first good night's sleep -- still took awhile to fall asleep but slept long 9although on BOTH Day 4 and Day 5, I woke up at about 3 AM and couldn't go back to sleep until 5 but then I went back to sleep). Saturday was good but Sunday I started to feel a bit down again and this lasted several days. Today is the best day so far -- energy returning, sense of humor returning, feeling 'real again'.
Part of what I do is work with animals. I always felt like the drugs helped me to do MORE with them and keep things in 'tip top' shape. I realized today, though, as I hung out with them and was actually 'there' that it was very different from the times in which I was 'high happy'. I'm not saying they could tell nor did I ever keep things less than perfectly clean -- I just noticed how different is was to be 'present' without the drugs. In a good way.
I have spent virtually all day on the phone and otherwise dealing with I don't know how many people trying to figure out what we can/should do about Rich R., who is in severe crisis at the moment.
It started with a call first thing this a.m. from a friend of mine who was Rich's boss ("Boss") until maybe 6 weeks ago. I have been friends with Boss and his wife since my drinking days in mid-to-late '80's (they both knew I had a problem with alcohol then and they both know about my "recent unpleasantness.") Anyway, Boss was aware that Rich was a serious alcoholic with a tendency to go hog wild with pain killers. But, Rich ran a pretty good recovery program, did good work and Boss genuinely likes and cares about him.
Long story short: Rich is holed up at home drunk as snot and eating all the pills he can get his hands on. Rich got fired by new-boss (Boss got a new job 6 weeks ago)Wednesday and he's been having a generally bad time of it since October of '05, with his life becoming more and more unmanagable.
It really kinda stinks. Rich has had some times of extended sobriety, but every 4 or 5 years down that road the wheels always seem to fall off his wagon. He tends to crash and burns in spectacular and messy fashion - frequently it involves jail or the mental hospitals.
Now Rich is no dummy - he's a former USMC Captain, an attorney, a former prosecutor, he's even a Certified Addiction Counslor. But he has the disease in a BAD WAY. The plan is to send him off for long term treatment (again) - hopefully tonight, before he kills himself (one way or another) or hurts his wonderful family (beautiful, sweet wife, and a boy and girl 5 & 8). We'll see
Well, I'm gonna go see my kids - this has not been a fun day. C
It started with a call first thing this a.m. from a friend of mine who was Rich's boss ("Boss") until maybe 6 weeks ago. I have been friends with Boss and his wife since my drinking days in mid-to-late '80's (they both knew I had a problem with alcohol then and they both know about my "recent unpleasantness.") Anyway, Boss was aware that Rich was a serious alcoholic with a tendency to go hog wild with pain killers. But, Rich ran a pretty good recovery program, did good work and Boss genuinely likes and cares about him.
Long story short: Rich is holed up at home drunk as snot and eating all the pills he can get his hands on. Rich got fired by new-boss (Boss got a new job 6 weeks ago)Wednesday and he's been having a generally bad time of it since October of '05, with his life becoming more and more unmanagable.
It really kinda stinks. Rich has had some times of extended sobriety, but every 4 or 5 years down that road the wheels always seem to fall off his wagon. He tends to crash and burns in spectacular and messy fashion - frequently it involves jail or the mental hospitals.
Now Rich is no dummy - he's a former USMC Captain, an attorney, a former prosecutor, he's even a Certified Addiction Counslor. But he has the disease in a BAD WAY. The plan is to send him off for long term treatment (again) - hopefully tonight, before he kills himself (one way or another) or hurts his wonderful family (beautiful, sweet wife, and a boy and girl 5 & 8). We'll see
Well, I'm gonna go see my kids - this has not been a fun day. C
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