I am glad ou have found some peace...after all of this you deserve it
I just wanted to thank everyone for all there advice.I've been wanting to post that question for almost 2 weeks now,but just didn't have the nerve.I don't want for people to think that I'm the type of person who doesn't care about how my actions affect others especially those I care about the most in my life.The sober me cares deeply even the 'high on vicodin me' felt disgust and guilt but not enough to stop.The hardest thing about telling someone this for me was hearing them say the things to me or call me the names that I already do to myself about what I did.I thank all of you for not treating me the way I sometimes think I deserve to be treated because of what I did.I can't imagine causing my husband anymore pain then I know I already have.I needed advice to know for certain what the right thing to do is.I'm just not at the point where I completely trust my own judgement yet,at least not where it comes to matters like this.I told so many lies while I was using,this is the lowest I sunk because of my addiction,and it's the only one I haven't fessed up to ,well at least not to my husband.It helped for me to say it to someone and all your feedback has helped me to make a definite decision so again I thank you all for your responses. Peace.
Its really sad he has to pay 4 your addiction. I think you need to go tell him that you would rather cause him the most painfull thing anybody could put you through in the world, life changing, heart crushing, indescribable pain, rather than to detox from stupid pain pills! What you get the runs, cramps, crawling skin, sick? This, if he feels anything like I do, is going to be a life long pain. Why do women have to be such ******? I feel for him. Reading this just brought it all back for me, not that I dont think about it everyday!
If there is a chance he might find out he is going to be really upset later if you lie to him. It's a hard call but just be prepared to pay for your past actions. Even though you are changing for the better, that cannot go back and erase the mistakes of your past that are put in motion. He may not be able to get over it. I know I would bring it up to my husband forever if it happened to me. I also know that I would know the truth without being told. I imagine he knows but when he hears it from you it will be hard.
Sorry I'm no help.
I agree with cadillac....this was your misfortune and your bad judgement...and if he loves you it will cause him pain...to tell him to make yourself feel better is just not fair...I know honesty is important but honesty has its place...if he flat out asked me about it I would fess up...if he is danger because of it...i would fess up...to relieve your own conscience,,,,no
Confess to your most trusted friend. Confess to a Priest, or counselor. Don't blow your marriage. So many people have shattered their lives over such meaningless affairs. If you are sure that your husband can handle it, OK. If not... We all have private pieces in our lives.
What would be the point of telling him now? it is over...that is my thought....i would not want to hurt someone i loved just to unburden my own guilt...that is just my opinion and i dont see any purpose it would serve at this point...i would talk to a counseler or something...now that is just me and if u feel this is the only way u can live with it...tell him...i am just not sure he deserves the hurt it may cause him
Kim, Check your mail! Penelope
You're dealing with a dual edge sword here. I will send you a PM and explain my thoughts on it. Give me about 15 minutes and you will have it in your in-box!!
for one you need to be honest with him. i have done some things in my past and held them from my husband, but i could not take the guilt. so i told him everything, things were really ruff at first but then we worked through it togeather. nothing will get better untill your honest with him.
hope that helped.. good luck
lisa