Help me break this cycle

[winningone]

So.. I cycle between 2 to 3 days use/abuse of Vyvanse, trash those pills. Then a week or so later  I get some phentermine diet pills and do the same, use/abuse a few days then trash. This has been going on since late January.   Before that I battled with pain med abuse for well over a year.  I've not had pain meds since Jan of this year.   I like the speedy feeling of the vyvanse and phentermine, but not the lack of sleep, dry mouth and other side effects.   I want to get out of this cycle!  When I throw my pills away I usually do not feel any real withdrawals or anything and after a few days I feel strong and confident that I can stop.  But never fails when it is time for a refill I get them.  It's almost like a game to me. And also from boredom I believe.    Last week I got my vyvanse and used a little longer than usual 4 to 5 days, when I stopped this week I felt much more lethargic than usual and after a couple days I decided to get my phentermine filled.  So here I am day 2 of heavy phentermine use.   I want to flush them before I get too far with them too.  I just can't seem to do it this time. :(

[ROSYouralright]

WE LOVE "FLUSHING PARTIES" AROUND HERE! I ATTENDED ONE AND FLUSHED MY PILLS WHILE SOME OF THE GIRLS WAITED. PLEASE KNOW THAT YOU ARE NOT ALONE IN THIS AND THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS FLUSH THOSE SUCKERS NOW... I WILL WAIT HERE WHILE YOU DO IT IF YOUR READY!! WE ARE HERE TO ENCOURAGE AND SUPPORT YOU EVERY STEP OF THE WAY AND YOU WILL NOT BE LEFT TO YOUR OWN DEVICES AFTER YOU FLUSH THEM. YOU CAN POST OR SPEAK TO ANY OF US VIA PRIVATE MESSGAE ANYTIME YOU WANT! U CAN ALSO UTILIZE YOUR JOURNAL. BEST THING IS DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.. FLUSH THEM BEFORE YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR MIND. ALSO IF YOU ARE SERIOUS ABOUT YOUR RECOVERY CALL YOUR DOCTOR AND GET YOUR RX CANCELLED.... YOU CAN DO THIS AND FREEDOM FROM THE PILLS IS THE BEST GIFT YOU CAN GIVE YOURSELF... ONE MINUTE, ONE STEP, ONE DAY, ONE CHOICE AT A TIME

[VICourageous]

Hi, I see that you are back since you posted on the 5th. I replied to you on the last post regarding the fact that I was doing the Adderral with my Methadone. It is a really hard habit to break and it does take a lot of work. You said you gave up the Pain Pills. That was very good.I miss the "Uplift" Buzz everyday. BUT this is where I have to just let things go. I have to take baby steps to get things done or my Compulsive Behavior on wanting to get it done like Yesterday and all at once will kick in and make me want to use.When you stop the pills you will have to give your Brain & Body time to kick in the natural way. You have done it before. It takes a lot of Strength to fight that Pleasure (survival) Part of the Brain because it will want to play this tape over and over to trick you into to thinking that you need this for this or that reason. Stay Strong my friend and put up a good fight so you can get out of the vicious cycle it puts us in. I know You can do it. Try to get some Support too!!
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