Help

I am 7 1/2 weeks pregnant and on 30 mls of methadone.  My husband doesn't know.  I've tried telling him I'm addicted to pills when I was addicted to Hydrocodone.  He was in major denial.  My mom is the only one who knows about this.  My husband & I went to the Dr. the other day and heard the heart beat and saw the babe nestled in my womb.  Am so ashamed of my predicament.  I am truly afraid he would leave me.  I can't tell him.  My question is this:  Can I ween myself off of Methadone slowly, very slowly.  I'm due in November so I don't even think I would start to ween until after the first trimester.  What can I do?  Is it safe for the baby to do a slow withdrawl (withdrawal) from this drug?  I know that I should tell my husband.  I know that if I can't talk to him, my best friend, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer til death due us part.  I know that!!  But the times I've tried he has said, "How do you know you're addicted?"  Both of my parents were addicts, but they've gotten their lives together.  So if predisposition is true, then I'm a major candidate.  Again I'm ashamed to even talk about this with anyone other than my mother.
Signed,
Help Me Plz

[sway1]

there is a forum somewhere specifically for moms on methadone. let me see if i can find it for you. brb. sway

[CleanUpTime]

Have you shared this with your doctor? Maybe there is something they can do for you....

I found this site; specifically for mom's on Methadone...please check it out

http://excoboard.com/exco/index.php?boardid=15464

Might be of some help

Good luck!

[sway1]

thanks. i couldn't find it for her. sway

[alc1211]

Thanks for the website.  I read it.  Do you think and has anyone out there ever weened themselves off during pregnancy?  Am talking a very little at a time.  No I haven't told my primary.  I've told no one.  The guilt of being pregnant causes me worry and Lord knows I don't need that, but still I do worry.  Worry that weening my harm my baby.  I lost my first one this last March.  One day I was pregnant and the next week I wasn't.  I do believe that God knew it wouldn't be healthy and normal so He took it, but it was devastating.  Thank you Sway1 for your support too.  I'm gonna need all I can get.  Mom's can only do so much.  That was the right website though

[avisg]

YOU HAVE TO TELL YOUR DOCTOR that is very important they will help you either taper off of it or tell you whether it would be safer to stay on it until after the baby is born.Trust me they have been threw this before .plz put your need for you baby over your fear of others finding out .It will be OK !!!! You will have a healthy happy baby.:)

[CleanUpTime]

AVISG is right, TELL your doc...not only for your mental sake but your baby's sake...you'll feel so much better...and he/she will need to know...

Good luck!

[ejwilson]

You need to see a doctor and be very honest with him/her. This is the most important thing you need to do right away for your health and that of the fetus. Have your mom go with you so you both hear what the doctor says. I know for sure that you are not to taper at all in the 1st trimester!!! . After you have all the information about the drug and what you are going to do, then you (and your mom) can approach your husband and be truthful with him. Lying about and hiding drugs is no way to live. I've been there! I read your post to my husband and this next paragraph is from him. elaine

From: elaine's husband
As an expecting mother, your responsibility is first and foremost to your unborn child.
30 mg per day is not a terrible level, however it is NOT safe to withdraw during pregnancy.
The first 2 of 3 phases of withdrawal are up to 45 days in cold turkey
In tapered withdrawal, your immediate stress is less, but it compounds the stress for the fetus.
IN SHORT, you need professional guidance from a female addictionist who has had children.
    SHE must work with your pre-natal care specialist.
Addiction is not a disease.  It is a physical dependency and should not be a matter for (shame)
Your husbands role is to provide, nurture, love and care, NOT make medical decisions for you and your baby.

Last, you need out from under the stress before you terminate the pregnancy from worry as your body needs to be a rest and your mind at peace.  Do what you must first for yourself, that your own health is what your baby and you BOTH are depending on.

Don't question the morals, beyond doing what is right and do it NOW.  Get help.

[alc1211]

I know all of what you say is true.  My mom is basically telling me the same thing:  Tell the Dr., and I KNOW I should.  I will, I will, I will.  There it is decided.  Am not sure when my next app't is, but I know she has to know.  My mom will have to go with me next time.  I love my husband more than anything, but he nor his family has no concept of Methadone, Norco, nothing or what drug dependency is.  Thank you all so much for support.  It's enough dealing with morning sickness, but throw the addiction on top and it's too much to even think about.  That I caused this by stupid, stupid choices.
annie lc

[alc1211]

My husband means so well.  He's taking care of me without a clue of what is really going on.  I know I told you that we were trying before (was trying to come down then and that was in October) but this wasn't planned.  I've heard too, not to taper off of Methadone during pregnancy.  OMG I honestly don't know what to do.  I will have to check to see if there is an addiction specialist in my area.  there has to be.  Will keep you all informed.  Thanks so much for your support.  At least I found this site and can talk with people  who are more experienced in this than I am.
alc

[kim715]

There is a ob/gyn ,shes wonderful.Her name is 1234betterlife  and helps so many women here in your situation. I am going to send her a pm and ask her to get in touch with you. I  was on methadone for over a year.I now have a little over a year clean so if I can help you in any way,just ask.All the best...Kim

[ejwilson]

Hi Annie, Your mom is right. You need to tell your doctor and go from there. Your doctor will know what to do and how to help you deal with this in a positive light!  I feel its very important that you call today and make an appointment for today or Monday. Please Don't put this off until your next app. OR  you and your mom can drive to your Dr's office and just tell them at the desk you need to speak to her and it is very important. The sooner you do this the better for you and the baby.  When you tell your husband, just stick to the facts. If he gets truly upset, angry and wants to argue-stay at your moms for the night until he can talk peacefully.  You don't need to tell anyone else about this, only your husband and the doctors who will be treating you. Your husband needs to know in case something were to happen and he would have to tell the paramedics or ER doctor what meds you take.

As for stupid choices,  been there done that. Just keep going forward
making smart, healthy choices. Telling your mom was a smart choice and listening to her will be a smart choice too. Being pregnant should be an exciting time in your life and once you get this out in the light it will be. I will be here everyday to support you if you want to talk. And every body on this forum will help support you too. Keep in touch with me. I want to know if its a boy or girl or ??? twins? later elaine