Help....I am a newbie in more ways than one

Hi... Let me bring you to how I got to this point...I will be brief. I am 33 female, married and a mother to three children 11 and younger. At 31 I was diagnosed with stage 3c breast cancer that had matasized to my lymph nodes. I in the last 2 years have had 6 months of chemo, 32 rounds of radiation, 9 surgeries and numerous other treatments and medications. So I have been taking Norco 10/325 for this past two years as you can imagine I have a lot of pain. Now I take 4-5 pills a day.... and I know from reading a lot of posts on here that 4-5 pills a day isnt that much, as there are some who take 15-30 pills a day. But my problem is this... I am afraid that I am addicted now....if I don't take them I feel really bad, have no energy, irritable, cranky, my body aches all over....so am I hurting and all this because I am REALLY HURTING or because I AM ADDICTED????  CHemo did major liver damage on me and now my liver is the size of a severly obese persons liver...it functions properly right now just very very large....I don't want to make things worse by taking this norco. I also don't want to be addicted to this....I already have to take ambien to sleep...and I am okay with that as its not damaging to my liver. I take wellbutrin as my antidepressant....and some other medications aimed at trying to help me stay cancer free. Again I am only 33 years old...and God willing I have many years left to be a wife, to be a mother, to just be me. For the time being and I pray forever, I am cancer free and I don't want to worry about liver failure....so any thoughts or suggestions would be great. I don't nor never have tried to switch Doctors to obtain meds, I have never tried to get prescriptions before they were due, I have ran out a couple days sooner than I should have but only by a 3-5 days. Am I addicted or not??? What else can I use that will rid my pain as good as norco does?? Any thoughts, ideas, suggestions...will be greatly appreciated!!!!  Thank You.

[allaboutmary]

Hey welcome to the forum and congrat's on being cancer free.  Sounds like you have been through hell.  Pain does increase quite a bit while detoxing from the pills. You probably won't know your true pain level until you are off the pain pills for 2 weeks to a month. There's a very good chance you are just physically dependent on the pills and not addicted.  I would try to slowly taper down on the pills. Expect to have some flu like symptom and low energy for a while. Sounds like your a tuff lady .You can get through this. Keep reading and posting on this forum. It will help.

[LongerDays]

Your description sounds more like dependence than addiction. In my understanding, dependence occurs when your body cannot function normally without the drug. In your case, sounds like you can't function normally without the pain medication. You don't actively seek the drug for other uses beyond pain control (to get a buzz, for energy, to avoid withdrawal symptoms, etc).  

The question of what to use instead of the narcotic for pain control is a difficult question. For me, nothing has been able to replace the level of pain control that opiates did, and I hurt all the time.  I know that's the answer you want, and I hope somebody here, or a physician, has better suggestions.  

[WDsRawful]

Congratulations on being cancer free!  I'm very happy for you and will pray for you to remain that way.  Talk to your doctor about it.  Your pills were prescribed for a very legitimate purpose and since you're feeling uncomfortable with your dependence on it you should tell your doctor and see what he/she suggests.  Good luck and keep us posted.

[benevolentlaughter]

Congrats on being cancer free, my friend! That's always an amazing thing to hear..

I'm in the same boat as you right now in a lot of ways. I've been prescribed these pills legitamentally by my doctor, but I've unwillingly become dependant on them. I picked up the phone and asked to speak with my doctor about this today, so I think that would be a good idea for you as well. Let them know what you're thinking right now. If you think that there is an issue with taking the pills that you are, let him/her know! Hopefully, they'll be more supportive and helpful with you than my doctor is being with me right now. hehehe.