Here we go--Oxy WD diary Sunday D-day

[sportnut]

Broke the news to my wife Friday night, actually it was no news she had a suspected it all along, she is very loving and understanding and had read up on this withdrawl issue already, she had links for "ME" to read, wow and we think we have everyone fooled :>)

For the 4th we had a 10 hour road trip planned with parents and kids, we discussed this and to my surprise she said that was not the day to stop and I agreed so I nibbled on my Oxy to stay alert as I was designated to drive the entire 10 hours which ended up being 11 hours but none the less we all had a wonderful day.

Sunday, D-day started off good normal activities mowed, worked out etc thought to myself "what's the big deal"  but hit the "exhausted, constant yawning" wall around 1:00, wife said "don't fight it take a nap", I did two hours later woke up!
Went out and did some family activities but felt very very tired, wanted that nibble but fought it, hit a wall again at 5:00, took another nap! Woke up two hours later 7:00 pm.
Too tired to carry on a conversation with my wife and kids but she understood this time, went to bed with wife around 9:30 slept great woke up feeling great.

Up at 6:00 for work day and the only thing I notice today is the pains in my body from years of sports and working out that were masked by the Oxy, hip , back, shoulders, more annoying than anything.

Having told my wife and having her support is paramount, instead of her asking "what's wrong" yesterday and me blowing it off and making excuses before when trying to quit now she knows and does not take the mood thing personally.

The aches and pains I know are from sports stuff and not WD, the tired feeling "IS" the WD but like my wife said, "we all have tired days what is wrong with that? We all have days when we want to take a little nap on the weekend, what is wrong with that?

Good points!

Clarity today at work is much better than previous weeks on the Oxy but it is early in the day.
Going to stay busy and keep on rollin' along.

I'll keep you updated but I'm determined to kick it now that my spouse is in the loop.

[wings444]

Hi
Good luck with going off those oxy's BUT Im sorry to say more aches and pains are going to follow and Not just from sports... WD is painfull....and you may feel aggitated...I am or was (whatever) addicted to percs taking 20 or more a day...I really did'nt have the kind of pain you have from sports but...Your body will feel abit creepy for a while and restless legs are a huge part of it...Please follow advice from alot of these people because I would be NO WAY where I am now 12 days clean without the help...from this site!!! Im not being negative everyone is differant but please exspect maybe abit more than just aches and pains from sports These drugs are very powerfull.
I hope Im not out of line here Its just from my experience!!
I wish you all the best sportnut!!!
Take Care (LOTS OF HOT BATHS)))
Wings

[voxxx]

I agree with wings, you most likely will feel much more pain than normal. Of course it all varies with what you are taking and how much/how long you have been taking it. Just be prepared for whats to come. Its kind of surprising you were able to sleep on day 1, much less get a full nights sleep and wake up feeling GOOD. Restless legs was the worst part I think, except I got RLS in my upper arms instead of legs. Maybe if you keep a positive attitude (which it seems like you are at the moment) you wont notice the withdrawals so much. Goodluck.

[sportnut]

10 - 20 mg some days just bite one 20 in half, some days just 1/4, some day 4 1/4 nips as I called it to equal a whole 20 mg for about 4 years now after my 4th rotator cuff surgery.
50 years old very active in coaching HS sports, fitness etc.
Just woke up one day, researched some posts and realized I fell into this trap.
Eased off before on some weekends a slept/yawned but lied to my family that I was just burnt out from work and working out.
Now it's out in the open, I did have some jumpy quivering legs last night, also was freezing cold which is not like me and opposite of the sweats I have read about on here.
Starting to feel that sleepy wall coming :>)
Long way to go that is why I will keep posting for others to read what this is like.

[theeagle]

Calcium/magnesium supps are recommended for those leg things....so are banana's and a commercial product at Walgreens called Hylands Restful Legs ....and hot showes/baths.  The amino L-Tyrosine helps with energy/fatigue.  I found benadry (diphenhydramine) to be best OTC for sleep for me.  A heat pad/electric blanket is nice for RLS/freezing..eagle

[sportnut]

Is L-Tyrosine Over the Counter?
That is going to be my biggest issue, energy.
Tonight is my night for a good 1-2 mile run and workout and all I want to do is take a nap lol.
I'm trying to stay good spirited about it, I am an optimist.
I am also fighting the urge to take a nip and not talk myself into "tapering" like so many posts I'm reading here.

[theeagle]

Tyrosine is OTC - its a simple amino acid.....if you take too much it is merely eliminated through urine and feces.......reference Amino Acid Protocol in medhelp search engine or through health pages/discussions........Energy drinks are mostly amino's - some with caffeine.....         Dont rememeber your dose, but I believe you were low enough that a taper would most likely be more work than worth.....

[tylersblueeyedmama]

Congratulations :)  Your wife sounds like an amazing women...lucky u :) I myself have been where you are and my fiancee has been the backbone through all this...without him and my lil boy...I never would have made it!  Though it is scary to tell the ones we love...they just love us for who we are!!!

Keep us posted!!!

[sportnut]

Just back in from lunch and took a little 1/2 hour nap.
Wanted to go get some L-Tyrosine and discussed with my wife and she said "why get off one thing and just get on another, just take a nap".
So here the addiction kicks in, I went into a local food store anyway and they did not have it, a sign? :>)
Went home took a snooze, weird I was awaken by a tugging on my shoulder, was just nerves firing off nobody was there, very very strong tugging sensation.
Have had the dropsies every sense I woke up, keep dropping things? This stuff must rewire your brain too. Scary ****.
Back working now hoping to get through the afternoon.

[sportnut]

Ok this is why I'm here, HELP.
Wow trying to do this during the work week is proving very very difficult.
If I were home no big but the sleepieness, yawning is very apparent and obvious to co-workers.
Making typo's all over the place, typing as much backward as forward, what's up with that?

It is very tempting to nibble a bit and taper until I get to the weekend for two days off of it.
Last night and this am was a piece of cake now troubleville.

Any advice, give in and taper nibble a 1/4 to get through?
Have one and a half days behind hate to digress but I have a high profile/responsibilty job and a family to support too.

Sux I got myself here in the first place!

[NoMoreFog]

Everyone is different in terms of discipline with tapering. I know that I wouldn't be able to taper -- I would just end up escalating the dosage right back into full addiction.

Tapering works for many people, so it's hard to give you a clear answer IMO. I always thought...if you taper down to, say, 5mg, and then that no longer works (and you start losing concentration, start shivering, start aching etc.), what's to stop you from taking 7.5 mg? Then 10mg? And so on.

What your body is going through is the natural withdrawal process, you've made the choice to live a life without opiates, you want to be free from them, don't you?

I know it does suck, I've been there before. But my advice is this: Don't sacrifice what you want most for what you want at the moment. Your body is PROGRESSIVELY learning how to deal without opiates, and in my unscientific opinion giving it even 5mg will stall that process or even cause it to regress.


As for learning how to get through the day, I don't know if you can afford to do it, but I just "mailed it in" for a few days (2). I am an attorney, and there were two days where I billed like 4 hours total (I usually average 10+hrs a day).

I understand that you have a high responsibility job. But eventually your body is going to have to go through the withdrawal process, taper or not. Even if you got down to a sliver of a pill, going from that sliver to ZERO is still going give you the symptoms (albeit probably lower in intensity).

Just think....if you continue holding strong with your devotion to cutting it cold turkey, by next week you will be FREE from this addiction! Alternatively, if you taper, you'll still be weeks off of being opiate free. What do you want more?

[Allicat0117]

The worst days are 2-4. You will have flu like symptoms (but way worse) for about a week. Check out the thomas recipe. It will help...tell your wife it is just to help you through the w/d..basically a bunch of vitamins and amino acids...not addicting. Do not go back. You are just getting to the bad part but it wil only last a few days. Can you take a couple of sick days? Tell them you have the flu. HAng in there and keep posting!!!

[sportnut]

Thanks for the advice, almost too exhausted to type now.
2.5 hours of the work day to go.
Beautiful weather and tonight is going to be a wasted night but will stay the course.
I readup on the L-Tyrosine and it seems dicey, better off just letting the body and mind
go throught it's reprogramming and adjustment period.
Will probably stay away from others as the irritability is creeping in, mainly because I'm used to being active, energectic and outside on days like this now I'm just in an internal battle and is frustrating to be so darn tired and unmotivated feeling on such a beautiful day!

[sportnut]

Longest work day ever.
Counting the minutes, I think the co-workers are noticing because of the extreme in personallity swing, outgoing energetic to this, now sneezing and runny nose, what the heck?
Just blew off a 3:15 Dr Appointment to talk about his because I didn't have the energy to get up and go, that is sad.
Read more on the L-Tyrosine as I have a full 10 hour day tomorrow and no way of getting out of my part in an upgrade and I am the main player and project manager so I have to find an alternative to the way things have been today or I am toast. I will be up and on th go from 8:00 am until 6:00 pm tomorrow and it HAS to work.
Some info I have read say it does nothing for days so it seems pointless at this point.
Man this is where the struggle comes in isn't it?
Sooooo easy right now to say "just take a nibble and go through WD later" .
I know it sound like excuses, I want to kick it, this am I felt so good and know that is the reward but getting there...................

[Allicat0117]

There will NEVER be a later!!! DO NOT GIVE IN NOW!!! Read the thomas Recipe..bottom right side of this page. It will help. Call and reschedule your dr appt. He can prescribe you some nonaddicting meds to help you through the next few days.

[theeagle]

Listen to these people......you are attempting to make all the wrong moves that intuitively seem proper right now - - your Doc can help - - this doesnt go away - - you merely postpone it and it gets worse....Stay the course.

[CATUF]

I always found that l-tyro had a quick and dramatic affect on me -- I've been in sustained recovery for a while and still take l-tyro regurarly.

At the last rehab I went to amino acid therapy was an integral part of the program.  That part of the program was based on the advice/consultation of Charles Gant, M.D., who wrote End Your Addiction Now.  That book is worth taking a look at - just skip to chapter 4 and take the several short questionnaires, which will tell you how much you need of what.  

You should be able to find the book at the public library.  If not, you get it on-line and in the meantime take a look at the "Thomas Receipe."  You can search for it on MedHelp or on Google.  It's similar to what you'll find in Gant's book, just a one-size-fits-all version.  Actually, I guess the "Amino Protocol" that shows up on this forum would do that trick.

CATUF
1492

[Florida_Guy737]

Sport....I'm a jock and have been where you are as most of us have.  OK...you can take l-tyro but make it easy for yourself; go purchase a complex amino powder from GNC, etc.  Mix with mill (lowfat of course) and drink 3 of these a day.  For energy during the day...one word for you - caffeine and lots of it.  I was taking a 6-pack of those cold starbucks expresso shots with me to work and drank one every 2 hours.  The wd time will suc for probably at least 3 weeks and energy return is different for everyone.  One week after my quit (after a taper), I was in the gym with new fitness goals.

Keep focused, stay away from the nibbles and appreciate the changes your body is going through...even the tiredness. Why....because your body is healing itself.

Good Luck & Read the PAWS info...this info will help you throughout the coming months.

Guy

[Kevin_Bacon]

Geez, this is a tough one ... remember, none of us are doctors here (that I know of), and a medical opinion or two could be really helpful ...

Correct me if I've got it wrong: 20mg (max) oxy, lots of surgery and resultant pain, which the fairly small dose brought relief -- as well as "instant energy," ease of sociality, confidence (?) and, if I may, crummy things happen to the nicest people.

Can you get in to see the doctor who prescribed the oxy in the first place? Or, if not, whomever okayed the repeats? Tell them it's urgent, but not hospital-urgent ... tell the receptionist you HAVE TO see this doctor immediately because the medication is making you extremely ill, and when you stopped taking it, well, tell her what's going on! I'm sure they'll understand your recent no-show, and perhaps give you 10 minutes -- say " ... five or ten minutes of her/his time ... I'm having enormous difficulties at work!"

He might prescibe Suboxone -- an opioid-withdrawal drug which is apparently okay if it's one week only ... or come up with something else. Make sure he knows you want OFF Oxycontin and OFF all opioids. If he mentions Methadone, polietly say, "I don't think so ..." and the subs, well, you can look around this site. Some favorable posts about one week (seven days only ... seven days only ... seven days only ...), but it seems like an extreme route to take -- he might taper you with a less potent drug OR (bring the subject up!) he'll say, "You're off them now -- let's keep it that way." and find something in his kit-bag that will ease the transition ...

I mention the Suboxone so you're prepared for the subject if it comes up ... pulling the plug on 20mg may not seem to be a big deal to some readers, but after four years on them, you could be in for an extended withdrawal. No way to get a few days off? I think thr place of business  Don't panic ... if you can get in to see him or one of his gang tomorrow, you may very well be advised to "stay the course," but you need to see a therapist/addiction doctor for a while as you make this adjustment.

Let us know how it goes -- don't want you to end up in an ER over this when you might be able to get advice -- quickly! --  and get through it. Oxy is one of the most addictive drugs on the planet, and the next few weeks could see major mood swings, which might might be a time to get a "flu" or something like it ...

Let us know how things are going, okay?

[spongeboy]

Dont give in man. I didnt think i could make it through my work day (im on day 9) last week but i just sucked it up. I have a responsible position also.  Be strong. Dont do anymore of this poison. Good luck!

[Kevin_Bacon]

Should be "I think your place of business will keep chugging along if you're down and out with illness ..."

... and "might might" is mighty strange ...

Getting old just ... happens.

[sportnut]

In early for the long day so may not post.
Did not give into the nibble yesterday. Got off work and went to the health food store for the B6 and L-Tyro which I started this am, got home took a one hour nap got up from that an had an ok night, lifted some light weights in the basement big surprise.
Slept great again and did some stretching this am but it's early, trying to help purge this ****.
Bouught some Pepsi max and took my vitamins hopefully today is better energy wise.
I have coached baseball for many years and got a group of young men two games from a state championship, I am giving myself those same motivational talks now :>)
Thanks to my wife and you all out here I will get through this. If it gets too long I'll see the doc but I'm not very trusting of them at the moment.
Gotta run catch up later.

[mom_of_two136]

I just wanted to jump in and say you are doing an awsome job so far. You are staying positive and half the battle is the mind games with yourself. I have CT many times and I found that Red Bull really helped with the energy (has many of the amino acids that have been suggested). Also staying hydrated really helps the brain cells. I hope you have a good day. Congrats on taking control of you life!! Keep posting it really helps you and others struggling :))

[theeagle]

You are making proper decisions and sounding good today, Sport....... best of luck and stick with it........ many have done this and it is doable. Not fun nor easy but may be done. Remember that. I dont need to tell ya that yesterday was the only easy day ..... and that obstacles are what you see when you take your eyes off the goal..... you already know these things....,keep listening to your own pep talks.....and good luck!!

[caliboy619]

i quit Oxy's cold turkey and let me tell you... you havent even began to feel the effects of WD. i hate to say it but its true and i wouldnt wish it on ANYBODY! i had to go through it alone without my wife or the rest of my family knowing it and it was like being in a mental prison for 8 days!!!  if seeking medical help for WD isnt an option for you, or you have no insurance etc. then the only thing you can do is STAY STRONG MENTALLY!!! i had every symptom you can imagine from the crawling skin and flu symptoms, to EXTREME constipation (then runs), cold sweats, and kicking feet and swinging arms every 2 seconds... i had to use every bit of mental power i could to keep from SCREAMING. i didnt think i was gonna make it because i was getting NO sleep and i was slowly LOOSING MY MIND! i had to stay as calm as possible in bed next to my wife so that she wouldnt suspect anything and still function in the day without a wink of sleep! there were points when i wanted to check myself in to some kind of clinic but i couldnt go out like that... i knew i had to battle this mentally and that eventually it would pass. so thats what will save you my friend... mental strength is the key to overcoming this HELL. by now im sure you are feeling the full effects of WD in day2 and it must be hell for you right now but just remember thousands of others have gone through the exact same thing.

[sportnut]

Well started day three at 6:50 am and got home at 9:30 pm after a huge upgrade.
I am a 50 year old IT specialist and had 5 vendors and 13 people under my wings.
My personal words of advice and mine only, STAY BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can't tell you how staying busy all day kept my mind off of this and helped me through day three.
I had no access to my "little stash" and got through on one 5 hour energy and three Pepsi Max and the L-Tyro/B6.
I didn't have time to slow down and think about myself, at the end of a 13.5 hour day it was amazing to look back at it and think how the old me was coming back already in my decision making process.

Over my 24 year career I was know for being the calm in the storm and yesterday was full of little storms as these things always are but rather than runnin a million miles an hour and sneaking off for nibbles of Oxy to keep going I was the person who kept everyone grounded, made good sound decisions and got us through a very long stressful day.
It was a great sense of accomplishment to have not caved Monday afternoon which has by far been the worst day of this WD, it was a nightmare the second half of that day.

I had some jumpy ankles, yes ankles last night but not too bad and maybe from being on my feet for 13 hours or WD who knows but oh well doesn't matter it is what it is at this point and I am looking ahead not back.
One of those baseball speeches included "a season is a marathon not a sprint", that is what this is, I'm pacing myself, know that today could be totally different than yesterday but if I could get through Monday afternoon I can get through anything.

I'll post later after seeing how today goes but I really think that keeping busy and the mind occupied with things other than my personal probelm was key to a good day yesterday.

[sportnut]

Having told my wife was key. I tried it while keeping my little secret to no avail before now someone is monitoring and understanding what I'm dealing with.
I look at it like this...
I made it through 4 RT Cuff surgeries, two re-do's back to back and six weeks of hellish rehab/pt, excruciating pain for each one.
This is rehab too but for a lot shorter amount of time, even if it is two weeks I'm going to make it, I'm flushing 50 20 mg Oxy's tonight.

My wife understands now but if I regressed it wouldn't go so well.
I didn't get hooked for recreational purposes so maybe that is why she is so understanding.

About a year ago I spoke to my doc a bout it and he said "just quit" that was it.
A few weeks later he wrote me another RX so I'm doing it without the help of the medical community, you all out here are much better help that the script writers :>)

[j34]

Okay withdrawal *****!!!! Agreed but what about after care,we didn't become addicted in one day so after withdrawals what do we need to do . For me it was to find others who were JUST LIKE ME which i went to Na and started getting a support group and sponsor cause what I had found out is the drugs are but a symptom we have a disease which will manifest in different areas of our lives,ie... working out, eating, negative behaviour,poor me attitute. I had to deal with the underlying issues,which by the way I thought that I had none!!. Funny today. So here I sit quite happy, peaceful and my heart full today,What a gift but I sure had to work for it!!. I wish you well as your wife. Another thing that I found out is my family even though they wanted me clean sure was not used to this person clean all of a sudden, I was starting to become somebody different so a suggestion is for the family to get some help to . My Mom goes to Al anon and there is also Nar anon. This really helps with understanding our disease to our families . It is like the rock in the pond the ripples still effect the water. Wish you and family well,  

[sportnut]

I couldn't agree more something about this stuff was like a magic bullet to my mind and body when it hit me 4 years ago at 46.
I was getting run down and starting to deal with easing into mid life and not liking it for a lack of better terms. Nothing major that required counseling or anything just not ready to roll over and slow down, stubborn :>)
Doc had me on some different things, testosterone therapy and some trial and error and nothing.
Took this after the first surgery and was like wow where have you been!
BUT can't go on forever, and yes people have gotten used to me but the hyped up side has also annoyed at times.
Will stay the course.

BTW wow, middle of the day and now the RLS stuff is kicking in, lower legs below the knees feel like they are electrically charged, tingling, tugging, cramping, tonight should be fun.

[sportnut]

This afternoon has been a bear.
I am going straight to the Y and get a good run and workout in.
Don't feel like it at all right now but I know I will feel better afterwards.
Used to go everyday, been 4 days now need to get with it, if I so much as sit
down when I get home I know I'll wake up two hours from now.

These ARE the hard days (Day 4)