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1612110 tn?1388164992

Here we go.

Just took the last of my hydro's and will be going into withdrawal tomorrow. Yes I'm scared but I have to be sober again. I'm a 45 year old guy with a family who knows about my addiction and will be very supportive but CT withdrawal is scary. I do have a tiny bit of Subutex for a "quick taper" but using it scares me also...What to do?

I have been taking 10-12 10/325's a day and was wondering "how long, how bad"?
I have purposely burned ALL my bridges with my doctors and friends who have helped my in my addiction.
Should I just flush the Subutex now?

Any answers or support would be greatly appreciated.
20 Responses
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Avatar universal
Hi guys. New here, but not to recovery. I was taking 6-8 loratab daily for past year. I am on third day completely free. I tapered down with one a day for three days. I also had my Dr. Prescribe me clonodine, which seemed to help a lot. I am taking ltyrosine, and immodium. Tylenol or Motrin when needed and I luckily have ambien at night. I am taking hot showers and staying hydrated. I was wondering if I am through the worst of it, or is it going to get worse, as I have to go back to work tomorrow? Any suggestions, comments will be appreciated. Thanks!
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Avatar universal
So proud of you
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1612110 tn?1388164992
Yes, I am feeling again.
Feels good. ;)
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1612110 tn?1388164992
Helped the wife make dinner and almost cut my finger off chopping some cilantro, damn I look like I have Parkinsons. I forgot to mention that I quit taking my clonazepam a week and a half ago also, I think my shakiness is partly caused by my going off it also. Cigarettes taste sooo nasty I'm wondering why I smoke but will tackle that monster later. Found some meetings here in my town but am reluctant to go cause everyone knows everyone else here, gotta love small town life! Will probably drive the 28 miles to the "big city" to goto a meeting after Christmas...If anyone reading this knows any guys my age who would be willing to chat with me let me know.

Thanks!
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1612110 tn?1388164992
I know all about the Gaba and it's side effects and will cut back to my normal dose of 600mg once a day in a few days. I forgot to mention that I am a licensed pharm tech (go figure, right!)

Anyway, I cleaned up the house a little and shaved my head, I was long over due. Funny how you can lose your pride while on dope. Doing great for 2 days clean, VERY shaky but good none the less. My older kids are keeping an eye on me and in some ways I think it's good for them to know whats going on and to see my go through this, hopefully they never will. Sorry if I'm making this thread so long but I want it here for ME and others later on.

Gonna make some chow and relax. Oi!
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3197167 tn?1348968606
Don't you sound good!!  And you slept 6-7 hrs, albeit it fitfully?  That's great.  I truly believe the clonidine and the gabapentin are helping you.  I was on both of those, too, during my w/drawals but hadn't yet found MedHelp so I didn't realize they eased some the the w/drawal symptoms for me until "after the fact".

It may feel "odd" at first to walk back in the meeting rooms....but I'd gander to say..hahah....that you will be emotional....met with love and open arms...and it will be a "going home" moment for you.

Wanted to share one more thing about gabapentin....I don't know what dose you are on, but if you get to a place you want to stop taking it, make sure you wean down...cut your dose gradually...to avoid any possible seizure risk.  Some folks think gabapentin is addictive....but since I was on it for a few years and researched the heck out of it when I got off of it...I learned that while you can become dependent on it....and will have some physical w/drawal symptoms (some for up to 45 days after stopping it)...this particular medication does NOT exhibit the compulsive, drug-seeking behavior or strong cravings that indicate addiction.  That result comes from testing abusers AND compliant users of this med.

It is one of the newest meds being tested in helping alcoholics and drug addicts and is proving that in those particular patient's brains....more...MUCH more GABA (one of the neurotransmitters in our brains) is released and available in addicts/alcoholics who take gabapentin while getting clean and sober....which is why it is being used more and more frequently.

Keep on keepin on.....you're doing REALLY good....feeling again~
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2107676 tn?1388973859
Yes, Gabapentin is a godsend for some going thru opiate withdrawal.  You are wise to cut back on it as soon as possible as it can be addicting as well.
Your plan sounds good.
Stay strong.
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1612110 tn?1388164992
I am in Montana, somewhere in the Rockies. ;) Thank you all for all the support you have given me so far, it's been VERY encouraging.

Day 2: Got about 6-7 hours of fitful sleep last night and it was more than I had expected. The Gabapentin seems to be helping alot. I have been taking 600mg 3x a day and will drop to 2x a day tomorrow. The Clonidine is helping also and I am only taking it twice daily in the am and then again in the pm. Also taking Immodium as needed and drinking a ton of water and Gatoraide to keep myself hydrated.

This whole experience is not without it's plus's, I have been very emotional and have been taking a trip down memory lane to when I first got sober at the age of 20. I had a horrible Amphetamine addiction back in the 80's and was living on the streets of San Diego, Damn I was sober for sooo many years until I feel into this trap of opiate addiction. I knew better but took this path anyway. It will feel odd to goto an N/A meetings after all these years of denying that I was still an addict.

Anyway, gonna shower and get a few things around the house if I have the energy. Back later.
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4522800 tn?1470325834
Hi..Are you in Montana??..I am up at the top in Idaho. You are doing a great job..Just try to give this TIME..with time comes Patience. It takes time for the Brain/Body to readjust back from the removal of these Stims..Make sure you are drinking TONS of water..You can get some electrolyte and C powder to add to this. Make sure you replenish the Body/Brain with some good natural vit/min & Diet..There is so much to this. Try not to watch the clock..Just take this min by min and day by day. Try to get some kind of walking in or dance to the music in your house. I found it a bit harder to bounce back this time do to my Many years of use and my age..I went c/t on 3 meds over 15 moths ago and it did keep getting better & better. Just stay in-tune with your self and know that you will experience some stages as you heal..Just try to go with the flow..It is hard but not really as bad as we think.. The work really begins after the detox. Staying Clean takes work and SUPPORT..Hang in here and we will hold you up all the way..
Bless
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1612110 tn?1388164992
Too cold here for a walk...lol. Keep up the good work Today30, we can do this..We HAVE to do this. No going back.
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1612110 tn?1388164992
I think I took a nap but I don't know for sure. In full blown withdrawal now and am feeling like crap but I could feel worse I guess. It's 4:30 pm here in Big Sky country and the sun is going down, at least the short days here will make them go by quicker.Trying to stay positive. ;) Gonna go clean up the bedroom and take a shower. See ya tomorrow.
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Avatar universal
Keep it up! I went for a walk! Depending on the weather where you are fresh air helped me a lot!
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1612110 tn?1388164992
Shaky and a bit sick to my stomach but feeling decent for the most part. Gonna have some lunch (I think) and try to get some nap time in.
Doing okay for the most part.
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1612110 tn?1388164992
Day 1: Woke up feeling like crap and laid in bed thinking about the days, to come. Tried to drink some coffee with a cigarette both tasted nasty. Took 1 600mg Gabapentin and some Clonidine, I feel surprisingly okay right now..Gonna try and eat.
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1855076 tn?1337115303
Please flush the subs.  It will only bring more misery.  It only masks the symptoms initially and if you stop it you'll be in w/d.  If you stay on it a long time, you'll have to detox from the subs and that takes much longer.  Get the things in the Thomas recipe.  That will help.  Keep  posting.
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3197167 tn?1348968606
Sorry, I accidentally hit post before I was done.

I can totally relate to the DOC you're on and the dose.  Mine was about the same.  I was scared to quit and scared NOT to quit.  What are we to do?
It's a progressive disease.  Member back in 2011 you were at 4-5/day and that has now doubled?  There's no going backwards with this ugly addiction.  I'm SO GLAD you have chosen to quit....gain your freedom!

The clonidine and gabapentin should both help you... don't freak yourself out thinkin about what "might" happen....just hunker down....be grateful for an understanding wife and family.....time off work.....and a blessed season to give yourself and your family the VERY BEST gift you could ever give them.....a man free of the chains of addiction.  It's scary, yes....but the fear is much worse than the actuality.  90% of it is attitude.....wishing you well~
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3197167 tn?1348968606
Welcome back!!  MH stands for MedHelp....it's good you made it back.

Sounds like you already have your groundwork laid for success this time.  
Sources cut....secret addiction share....and aftercare lined up.  
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1612110 tn?1388164992
MH??
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1612110 tn?1388164992
Gonna flush em now! Thanks for answering me back. I'm scared as hell right now and my anxiety is through the roof. I am also prescribed Clonidine and Gabapentin which I have heard help with withdrawal. Will be attending N/A meetings once the worse is over. This will be a sh**** Christmas but it is probably the best gift I could give myself (and family), I have also taken the next week off so hopefully I am through the worse by the 30th. I will keep posting for sure. ;)
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Avatar universal
Flush the subs for sure! It will only drag it out and make you feel worse! The detox should last about a week with peak symptoms around day 3-4. Try to think of it as a bad case of the flu. You've done great by cutting your sources and telling your secret! All that's left to do is stop and take your life back. C/T is definitely the way to go. Just do it!  Check out the Thomas recipe below and drink lots of water.  Immodium is your best friend (next to MH). Best of luck and keep posting!
Helpful - 0
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