had a bad repeat of panic attack and High anxiety.. depression... restless leg syndrome at about a level of 6... pain in back has increased to about a 7... then back down to a 4.5..pain level. The worse was the constant panic of thinking you can't breathe. I was mentally capable of trying to handle it... but had to take a Xanax to calm it down... had to also sleep a lil to get rid of it. I tried to fight it for about four hours but it was intense,,, Had a situation that i was in listening to some bad past issues.. I believe triggered a back flash of sorts that manifested itself as high stress and anxiety... hard to tell the difference , but I recognized that it was social induced,, but mentally tolerable, Drug induced feels much more intense. knowing that this is accruing... i had to tell myself that it will be over soon.. the anxiety can only use my adrenalin so much and it will run out.. eventually...
Day 30... doing better with the depression... anxiety levels are lower... although now it's just normal anxiety vs drug induced anxiety ... a big difference. I don't have any craving... do miss having a way out of pain.... but my normal back pain will limit mobility.. but have to accept that there will never be a zero pain level with this spinal injury...and just re adjust my daily activities to keep those pain levels to a livable place.
Anyhow, just checkin in...
man... i hate anxiety attacks...
I have been off MS Contin for 24 days now... feel much better. Depression has reduced but is still there... Had a little Restless leg syndrome last night. So that revisits now and then I guess. My pain level feels the same as if i were still on the painkillers... Which does not surprise me. Three hours of sleep at a time seem to be the Norm... i just get as much as i can get when I can. Sometimes I'll sleep Five hours... but never over six straight. i guess some levels haven't yet achieved their normal Pre opiate levels yet in my system.
anyhow... just updating...
A
hey, thanks for the tip.. much appreciated.... will do that asap.
I think b vitamins with zinc,omegas,and extra b12 help regenerate the nervous system.Vit d1000u/day as well.I also take coenzyme Q10.I am almost 5 months codeine free and still take those vitamins.Perhaps they will help you.Good for you stopping MSContin so well and keep posting.
Yes, I agree... addiction is one thing that I wish I could have done without... As its has not only been with Pain Meds... I have been on another drug that had a HOLD on me in my 20's... for six years. and yes... it was over an emotional issue I hadn't identified yet at that time. I was Lucky enough to kick that one. It was something that makes you go fast... get it? That drug was EASIER to kick than any Opiate they hand out to you at the doctors office...
But I'm telling you... You can do it. Yes... It will End... if you tell yourself this one thing that got me this far... I'm NOT taking that anymore Because I don't NEED this anymore. over and over.. until it's an attitude to complete this task no matter What your going to go through.
Anyhow... that was chatty...
... Update on meds status.... MS Contin 30mg... 0
None since I quit... No cravings... whatever that is... and no RLS so far up to this point. Anxiety has creeped in now and then but once again.. at a low manageable level. The depression has subsided... to a level where I can think clearly about what i'm not doing... if that makes sense? >>> Like what i let go... where i have to be kind of things are more in focus than before... mind you that before.. while weening off the MS Contin... anxiety.. depression..insomnia and panic attacks were a NORMAL thing that the drug brings on in my opinion.. so while coming off of it... the levels of all i mentioned before... seemed to... actually DECREASE as the dosage from MS contin continued to decrease... it really did.
so i hope this can help anyone out there that might need to hear that... I read everywhere on the net that it's worse to try and ween yourself off... as a matter of personal experience... it was easier to quit MS Contin by weening off it if you can for months.... than it was to quit an eight year Dance with Vikes...in one month. that was worse... so it's different for everyone of course...
A.
Narcotics are not the best choice for long term pain relief due to tolerence and addiction//but this u know already
also being a chronic pain patient...knowing at my dose it was no longer really about pain relief anymore..it became about getting up and feeling normal..not about pain relief would shutter to think what my daily dose would be in 10 yrs...it would scare me if i were in a bad accident and couldnt get pain relief due to my tolernce///but the pills have a way of only lettting us think about this for a sec//then we forget and go back into never never land//the land of escape
Chronic pain and addiction r 2 afflictions no one person should be afflicted with in their make up//fact is a chronic pain patient is a prime target for addiction//due to the fatigue and depresssion chronic pain can cause//plus we have a great excuse//on the surface that is
Pain is pain...emotional pain is tougher to me than physical pain///and true addiction is very painful.//the loss of control...losing ones self//the isolation and lonliness addiction brings///we either sink into it or dig ourselves out
keep us posted
Wow I just read your post... that is really amazing that you weened yourself off of the medication. I don't know how long withdrawal is suppose to last and perhaps you are the first documenting it like that on here. I think it is amazing that some people can make the decision and stick with it, you have tremendous will power. Good for you :)
Sorry for sounding so sappy... wanted to know when the withdraw symptoms stop... It has stopped so far for me on day 15... thats today. My RLS problems have stopped... still on a multivitamins for that... What I need to admit is the depression is there... but not as intense as i thought it would be. Need to make myself get out... thats the hard part.. and forcing myself to get on that treadmill... its a mental struggle. I miss that , Can Do anything attitude .. miss that part of myself. I know it's all part of the withdraw ... I keep reminding myself about it.
Anyhow, i'm still up weird hours, now got to get back to a normal sleep...