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I couldn't do it...I failed

Hello all...I had a horrible weekend and couldn't make it off anything...I tried by substituting something else...Took a xanax (that was too strong) to sleep it off and it lingered on me for days..I was miserable, I couldn't function, I couldn't think, couldn't remember...I missed a day and half that I can't even recall what I did or said to people...I tried to stay in bed, but have to deal with a verbal abuser of a husband who wouldn't leave me alone, telling me its all in my head, to get up, calling me names...I had to find some tabs (anything) and did last night to be able to make it to work and hopefully I haven't lost my job...I've lost everything else..I can't do it, I can't do it without going somewhere and having the time and yet I don't have the time to go anywhere or the money..I don't know what to do anymore...I just don't know what to do except to keep doing what I have been doing and get by....I feel horrible physically, mentally and totally about myself as a person...I just want to feel normal and I can't get there...
12 Responses
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463575 tn?1211302688
you can make this work. as the old saying goes..."if at first you don't succeed...."

can you give your hubby a xanax? sounds like he needs one.

good luck and god bless
Helpful - 0
401095 tn?1351391770
There is alot of support here.  I am afraid i dont know ur whole story but it sounds like u r struggling trying to quit some type of drug abuse....keep trying ur best to move forward.  I do know that in my life there never seems to be a good time to quit.  so i just had to make the time.  it is always one thing after the other between work, family and personal life.  seems as tho life is never calm for me bt the drugs really did make an extra problem and causes everything else to seem more intense than it really is...good luck and stay strong
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Well I don't think I can top what GTM just said to you,they gave you some words to live by.I will just offer you're not alone, YOU CAN DO THIS,and you're in my Prayers.Hang in there and keep posting. Peace.
Helpful - 0
352798 tn?1399298154
Missing the mark, is just one step closer to hitting the bullseye. It is when you quit aiming that you fail.
Helpful - 0
498385 tn?1362449404
j34
What is important is that you got back up not that you fell. Dont be so hard on yourself.My sponcers asks me what are u going to do today for your recovery?. Well I see that you are reaching out that is positive!! I will pray for u and somebody always loves you!!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
It was Thomas Edison that failed in his umpteenth attempt to make a light bulb - one of his assistants commented that they had failed X number of times......Edison replied that they hadnt failed that many times - but they know X number of things that dont work!!!
Helpful - 0
454371 tn?1221297385
Babe,
  You did not fail, Just get back on the horse. The same thing happened to me last weekend.
And as for that husband, I had one just like that, Really, I put up with it for 18yrs.. Then I had enough. You do not deserve that... No one does.. I divorced him. It was very hard for me to do. I have money problems now. But at least I have my respect. I am no longer his door mat. I am not telling you to leave your husband. That is what I did. I deserve to have someone who loves me and respects me. Not abuses me.... I feel for you honey... But only you know what is right for you. If you want to talk, just PM me. I am here for you..

                          Lady
Helpful - 0
496208 tn?1271339076
Please try not to be so hard on yourself.  You seem to have a lot going on.  Do your best to decide what you REALLY want and make small steps to get there if big ones are too difficult right now.  Believe me, I know all about verbally abusive husbands........ That alone is hard enough to deal with.  It would really be nice if he were your "soft place to land" but if not, land here.  There's always someone here to help.  (We live too far away to have the same husband--but I was beginning to wonder for a moment) ;o)

Blessings!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
lol....great idea!  
Helpful - 0
502050 tn?1243602535
Oh well then just choke the hubby and that will help with the frustration and your day WILL get better. LOL Good Luck my prayers are with you.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
You're right, but I can't afford not to have a job...I can afford to lose everything else. The last of my children will be leaving tomorrow, thank God he has a job in PA to go to, so that just leaves me with the hubby - but I have made arrangements this morning to go to a friends for help...All things are happening at once...Having to sell my house, trying to find a place to live, my oldest son is leaving for Iraq next month..My job is demanding....excuses? sure, but trying to get off and get healthly in the midst of all of this seems impossible....I thank you for your help and encouragement, I'm just having a down morning on myself...
Helpful - 0
502050 tn?1243602535
You did'nt fail you just miscalculated things. The biggest question I have for you is what is more important to you. You your health and sanity or these other problems ? Job there are others hubby? If he is not understanding then you are both going to need some outside help. But your life is worth more than anything else unless it would be kids.
Thank God I have great support. God Bless
Helpful - 0
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