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I don't know what to do. I am scared I will lose everything, even my life. Someone Please help me.

How do you recover from pills without rehab?  I cannot afford to lose my job with rehab.  I am scared, embarressed about being addicted, but, I cannot take it no more.  I will lose everything.
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Avatar universal
I am sorry I have not posted in the past few days, I have been working.  I really don't have a choice but to quit, I have guilty feelings about how I used to be and I want that back so bad.  I just want to get up in the mornings and go to work like normal people do.  I want to be able to go see my grown children without a high.  I want to be able to pay my bills on time, I am so tired of collectors calling me.  I make enough money to pay this, but when the dr. won't give me any more prescriptions  I buy them illegally.  I have not payed my house pymt. this month, and I am scared to death.  I can't go to detox, can't afford the loss of income.  I feel like I am strong enough to want to quit, but it is to hard when the loracet is available.  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I can understand that taking 6 weeks off from work, is in your case ...something you cannot do. That is a long time, with no money coming in. Do you have vacation time that you can use? Sick days, normally short-term disability doesn't begin until the 6th business day out. So if you could take 1 week, plus both the weekends. That would give you a full 10 days, to start the process.
Reading what hopeless stated, if you do what he states, start on that Friday night before your week off. By the end, you should have gone through your withdrawel period.
Is that something you can do?
My husband is addicted, I came to this site one night out of sheer desperation. So many people on here, truly want to help, have been there in one way or another. If you need support, we are all here for you.
***@**** - if you need to talk anytime..
I check my email often.

You can do it! You've taken the first step, coming here admitting to your problem and wanting the help. Now take the 2nd step.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I know of the withdrawels because I have tried many times to lay off.  I know of the diahreah, the weakness and can't think straight.  I have lost so much weight that the doctor has put me on vitamin injections.  I can't tell her what is really bothering me.  I can't afford to go six weeks without income.   God, I wish I could tell the doctor so they could help me.   I have lost so much weight that I hurt all the time in my joints and muscles.  I don't even know what feels normal anymore.  I want to be like I used to but I don' t even know what that is close to feeling like   I have lost so much time with my teenage son on account of this and also my grandchildren.  I am 45 years old, and I feel like I am so much older.
Helpful - 0
216878 tn?1196037520
By the way, what are you taking? How much of it do you take? How long have you been using this?
Helpful - 0
216878 tn?1196037520
Yes i agree with George,

Slow down, take a deep breath....
This takes time.........Remember that!

Just talk to us here, and no matter what you have to say just know you can...

Hopeless
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I had to do it pretty much the same way you want to do it.  I stopped cold turkey 23 days ago.  Seems like an eternity now.  The first week is very hard with withdrawals but you can do it IF you put your mind to it.  I stopped on a Thursday.  I worked at home that Friday - so I would have a good three days at home to get through the tough part.  I used parts of the Thomas Recipe - I also took a benzo (Xanax) the first few days to calm my mind down.  I also had to take one last night - I had a bad couple days of depression and I needed some relief.  I only used the Xanax as a last resort as they are highly addictive and the withdrawals if you get hooked on those can be dangerous - seizures, etc.

Anyway, I was taking at my worst point - 15 (sometimes more) 10 mg. Vic's and lots of Soma.  I still have good days and bad days but the changes in my life have been amazing - since this time, it was actually my decision to quit and not just because my supply ran out.  I am enjoying things so much more.  Everything tastes better, smells better - everything is just so different.  I am actually enjoying my favorite things again.  I able to cry now when I want.  Before I was taking so much cr*p - that my emotions were almost dead - come to think of it that is how I felt inside - dead.  At first, the emotions are very raw.  You cry a lot at the beginning but it is ok to do that.  I learned that by posting here.  I learned a lot of things posting here.

I wish you all the best - and one other thing that helped me a lot - come here if you are not feeling great.  Talk things out.  It helps a lot!

Hugs,

Shelby  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Well, what happened to her/him?  Are you there? There is help available for this.
Helpful - 0
177036 tn?1192286635
go to the suboxone website and punch in your zip code and the will find a doc near you that probably will just write a script.
Helpful - 0
182775 tn?1209736027
Please....slow down.  Nothing good happens fast.  You have taken a big step just in joining this Forum.  There are a lot of folks on this Forum who have been in your position and they will explain their experiences and help with advise.

Your first thought should be to know that withdrawl and recovery are a gradual process, not a sudden event.  It will take time; and, in the end you will be your old self again..

Now...please take a deep breath and monitor this Forum as I am sure others will be responding to your post.

GEORGE
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I know of the withdrawels because I have tried many times to lay off.  I know of the diahreah, the weakness and can't think straight.  I have lost so much weight that the doctor has put me on vitamin injections.  I can't tell her what is really bothering me.  I can't afford to go six weeks without income.   God, I wish I could tell the doctor so they could help me.   I have lost so much weight that I hurt all the time in my joints and muscles.  I don't even know what feels normal anymore.  I want to be like I used to but I don' t even know what that is close to feeling like   I have lost so much time with my teenage son on account of this and also my grandchildren.  I am 45 years old, and I feel like I am so much older.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I want to quit this or I would not have posted.  I don't know how to quit.  Any info would be appreciated.  
Helpful - 0
198154 tn?1337787265
I want to quit AND I know how..... I'm just not strong enough

this is a great thread.  lots o information
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I want to quit too, I have had enough.  My mind tells me that but my body does not want to allow it.  It scares me because I am getting physically sick ontop of mentally.  I don't know how to stop this, it is tearing me up physically and financially, it is taking my life away, and I can't tell anyone.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hi and wanted to say I am glad you are here.  You did the right thing by posting.  Is there anyone in your family who lives with you and could give support?   If so, perhaps you could start to taper your pills.  Its hard to do unless you have someone strong giving you your doses.  Is there a trusted friend who would be willing?  

So you are a young g-ma too?  I am 46 and have a g-daughter who almost 10.  In fact, my daughter and I used to push my youngest son and my grandaughter in strollers together.

If tapering doesn't work, is there a detox facility you could use or could you get on suboxone?  It has worked great for some of our members.

I wish you the best and know well the pain you are going through.
tzt
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I can' t go to a rehab, I have to work.  I just don't know where to go for help for this and and it is really scaring me.  I am tired of hiding this, but at the same time I have forgotton what it is like to be normal.  I am missing out on my kids and my grandchildren, my health is really going down and I don't know which way to go.  I can' t believe that I got addicted to hydrocodone the way I have, I am so ashamed I can't  go to anybody about this, but I have to do something, I just can't do this anymore.
Helpful - 0
216878 tn?1196037520
You have to really wanna do it!!!
I quit cold turkey on June 3rd...It's hard and tough, but if you are determined then you just have to stop.
I was taking anywhere from 6-10 percocets and Hydro's a day for over 4 years, NONSTOP...If even came to the point i couldnt go anywhere with my family unless i knew i had enough to take with me, and if i didn't i would not go.
It was Horrible!!!

I quit c/t on June 3rd...hardest thing i ever done in my life. I ran out and didn't have a choice, i could no longer get them...

You will have bad w/d symptoms but they only last like 5-7 days....You will feel like you have the flu...

I am telling you it is hard, but if you really want to quit it's possible....Just stay strong and know it gets better each and every day.

I could not sleep for 14 nights, and i mean NOT at all, but am sleeping fine now.

Here is a list of things you should have when you start.

* Imodium, (trust me) you will need this, you willhave the runs..bigtime!!

* Gingerale, (this is all i could handle)

* Bananas, (has potasium, will help ease the restless legs at night)

* I also started taking a sleeping pill, I take "Melatonin" You can get this over the counter at any drug store and it is cheap...

Taking long hot baths help alot....You will have absolutely NO energy for the first 5 days or so but it gets better...

I wish you all the best, and trust me if i can do it anyone can....
Not easy, but just keep telling yourself  " I can do this" get those 5 or 6 days over with and you will be so glad you began this process....

The cravings still come and go for me and i am on day 19....Still have down days, but just tell myself it can be done..

One more thing, i can honestly say if it weren't for this site, i know for a fact i could not have made it where i am now....

You can come here anytime you want, someone is usually here, the support is awsome here....Just to know that there are others just like you and struggling just like you is som amazing, thenit lets you know what to expect next...

If you need me just holler, i will try to help in any way i can...I am here off and on for the rest of the day...

Good Luck...
Remember, think poisitve, if this is truely something you want or need to do, thenit is possible

Hopeless
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
What is your addiction and how much are you taking/how long?
Helpful - 0
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