I said "NO" today!!!

I was confronted with the opiate demon today by an "old" friend who had some goodies!  It took everything in my being to say no and to walk away, but somehow i did!!  When i first said no , i thought to myself why just not 1 pill. Then i thought for a minute...... i knew it wouldnt be just 1 it would be an addiction shortly after that.  I felt like beating myself up all night not for taking it, but today i feel like i can take on the world once again!!!! I said NO and i meant it!! I feel so much better that i can say no and walk away.  What an incredible feeling to have the power once again!! My aftercare saved me from another bad choice and i just like to thank everyone here.  For anyone in the first couple of days of wd's.... make sure you get some kind of aftercare, quitting is the easy part, staying clean is the most difficult part.. BTW  DAY 50 for me today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Jester2005]

CONGRATS!!  I am sooooo VERY PROUD of you. It must have been hard to say no but you did it and you feel better for making the right choice - good for you!!

Do you have any tips on how I can convince Hubby that he needs aftercare to STAY clean, too? He's starting Day 5 and believes he can do it on his own, but I fear a relapse due to lack of extra support. His parents keep saying he CANNOT do it and I'm afraid it might get to him one day and he'll cave in due to their negativity.

Again, CONGRATS on your soberness and Day 50, WOW!! Keep it up  :)
(I can't wait until we get there, too.)


Jester

[DandMe]

Good for you.  I'm not that strong yet.  I'm still tapering down, I"m also staying away from the 1 friend who I know has pills.  Mostly out of bitternesss.  She has hundreds of pill and she knows I"m struggling. At first I was resentful that she didn't offer to help me taper down slower that what I have to b/c I don't have many left, but then I just felt that she will have to go through this at some point, maybe not now, but someday and she will know how I felt.  I'm in major bit*ch mode cause of the withdraws, I"m usually a very caring friend.

[umustbdreaming]

the day he starts to feel physically better is when he thinks hes ok.  This is the time for relapse.  Make sure he has plenty of aftercare such as NA or SMARTrecovery. Im sure they have something near you.  I had tons of weak points well up to 30-40 days clean.  The mental part tears at you everyday , it does get easier with time but sometimes its a day by day thing. Its not a race to get better it a friggin marathon. lol My wife has stood by my side thru my detox and recovery also.  Its tough for a non addict to get why their loved one just cant wake up one day and be ok.  We think about pills almost every waking moment and relapse can happen to the best of us at any point in recovery. Be there when hes not feeling well because even after my intial wd's i still woke up sick well into my 20 th days.  Some days are better than others but it does get better only time will heal.

[umustbdreaming]

thanx and congrats on deceiding to quit!!! Tapering is a great way to alleviate most of the wd symptoms but it didnt work to well for me , because well i was an addict and couldnt help myself!  If you have the will power to tapering it will make the wd process much more comfortable and most likely shorter.  Stay strong and keep focused we can do this its not the end of the world and it does get better dandme!!! Trust me ive been there and dont ever want to go back its completely worth it and everyday i dont use i get another day back of my life.  Keep us posted on your tapering and wd process we're all here for support anytime you need it!

[DandMe]

I was doing better earlier in the day.  But now?  I'm not so sure.  I went to the gym,( I was sweating anyways ) that did help, but grocery shopping with my 6 year old was bad.  I'm short tempered, agiatated, and feel like I"m going to jump out of my skin (and I'm not even off the pills yet) I'm hiding in my bedroom so I wont snap at anyone.  I just gave my hubby my pill bottle so I wont be tempted (I don't trust myself) I'm getting ready to take a xanax.  Thanks all.  This site has been a godsend.

[TakingAction]

Good for you.  That is incredible.  You are doing wonderful.  That took an amount of strength that you probably never knew you had.  Its amazing how much MORE we become when we finally allow ourselves LESS.

yea u.

matt

[Jester2005]

thanks for the advice... I know he won't be OK over-night, and what you said about when he feels better is the time to taper the clonazepam makes sense... we're still trying to get him into rehab, but it takes 4-8 weeks with the waiting list, and he says he won't go if he's able to stay clean the whole time (he doesn't see the point because he believes he can do this alone)... I really want him to get a sponsor so when he has a tough time he can talk to someone who understands better than I do... I know the mental part is harder than the physical...

On the bright side though, he left today before I got up and was out with people that can temp him, and it worried me sick all day... he was tempted and teased with an offer. But he said NO!! I am so proud of him  :D  He said it was hard, that all he could think about was "one last time" but he turned it down. I didn't think I would see this day, at least not so soon. I have more hope and spirit now...

thanks again for the help

[Darvocet1escape]

"why not just one pill". I'ts amazing how are addicted mind sneaks in and tries to talk us into that being ok. When you thought it thru and said no, the 'power' became yours not the drugs, good for you and may the force continue to be with you !!