INPATIENT REHAB

[Madisonjsmom]

My family wants me to go to inpatient rehab.  They know I have been clean for almost a month,  just having a hard time coping with the depression.  This has been a rollercoaster for me for years and I do not want to slip again.  Should I go? What to expect?  They are all behind me, and they will all help take care of my daughter.  I told my husband if I went that I felt like i could not show my face in this community again.   He said I could come out and hold my head high. Just mixed emotions, and what do I tell my daughter she is only 8?

[cathy5841]

oh sweetie, you need to do whatever you have to to remain clean.  there is no shame in going to a rehab..the shame would be if you kept using.  you have struggled for awhile..  r u on an anti depressant?  they really helped me.

[owhatamistake]

cathy is soooo right!  There is no shame in going to get help...the shame is using and doing nothing about it.  When I went to rehab (for 30 days) I felt like the weight of the world had been lifted when I walked through the doors!  Go if you have the opportunity.....and consider yourself one of the fortunate ones!  I felt so safe and so good and so happy that I didn't want to leave. lol  As far as your daughter...be as honest as possible...trust me, kids want you well when you're sick.  All she really needs to know is that your sick.  She can learn what you were sick from when she's older.  My kids were very small when I went....today, they know why I went.  I have explained things to them so that they don't go down the same path...genetics play a much bigger part than we think IMO.  Go if you have the chance!  You won't be sorry.

[NautyOne]

But, going to rehab when you are already 1 month clean?........did you guys miss that?...would they take you ?......I believe its called aftercare, and have you considered that .....support group.....I would see if you have a PA in your area.  I hear they are much better than NA & AA.......if you can find one......I don't think rehab is what you need if your already clean for that long.

I wish you well,,
Nauty.......

[owhatamistake]

Rehab isn't JUST for those actively using.....the detox is only the first 5 days or so of it. The rest is education and management....giving you the tools and mind set you need to stay clean.   She may be clean, but is she truly sober?  Maybe not.  There's a difference.

[owhatamistake]

I did understand and I did read your whole post.  There is a difference in outpatient aftercare (NA, PA, AA) and inpatient aftercare (rehab).  Rehab is obviously more intense and safer and a great thing if you're falling apart.  I went and it didn't haunt me through my personal health record.  It is expensive....but can you really put a price on your life and family and well being and happiness?   Insurance, many times, will cover it....opiates are sometimes not covered...however a person can be diagnosed with a dual addiction (depression and drug abuse) and many times opiate addiction can be covered that way.

You are absolutely right....it is a personal choice.

[avisg]

yes some people that are not actively using go to rehab . I dont think its a bad idea not  at all . I will give you some intensive recovery care gives you some stable clean time and gives you some time to learn how to live clean without quite as much outside pressure.

[learning2befree]

I would go so many of us dont get the chance, dont have the support, and/or dont have the money useing or not they can give you tools that last a lifetime I think its an excellant opportuity best of luck to you

[road2recovery]

I think you should go..BUT Please look into many of them before making your choice...I went to rehab almost 4 yrs ago , I definitly chose the wrong one.. I signed myself out in 14 days...But i did not look into all of them ..Now fast forward, and my daughter needs to go to rehab, I made sure it was not where i went, and i also checked this one out completly...It was very expensive, and mine was not ( guess you get what you pay for)...Happy to say that she is 8 months clean, and is going to go to college to be a counsouler in addiction...This is to me what i didnt get out of rehab that she did get...She had one on one counsouling through out each day...She had NA and AA meetings every day up to 4..She had group therapy...She learned so much that i cannot put into words...
Like you I thought i could never face my community again..I also own my own business, and didnt' know what they would think about me..TO my surprise ( because i didnt' lie about where i had been), they actually looked up to me, and told me that it takes alot of strenght to admit and do what i did....Many i learned had addicitons but were to embarrassed to say or admit , but they did to me...I actually had told my husband that when i got out, i wanted to move away, he said whatever you want...But to my surprise, everyone told me that i was stronger then they could ever be....But of course i felt weak, because i needed help...It is not that way...Looking back, I took the good they taught me and use it today, The bad i let go....My daugher still says she misses everyone that worked in her rehab, and goes to visit when she can...She says she learned more there , then she ever thought she would...I will tell you..There is not much free time...It is alot of meetings, writing in your journal, and counsouling....I think you should really think about this, and go ...Detox is not easy, but honestly that is the easy part....Staying clean is harder then anything i have ever went through...That is just my opinon..With your family behind you, and husband, I would go for it!!!
I also have children (4 of them) at the time my youngest was only 5...I missed her, and you will miss yours...But they bounce back , I promise...She needs her mommie, and she needs her mommie, not depressed or not living like you could be with the help you can get from a good rehab...Rehabs to me are not about detox....
Good luck with you decision, and if you ever want to talk i am here
r2r

[owhatamistake]

Exactly!  Great post!  I went to a rehab like your daughter.  I stayed clean 18 yrs before I relapsed.  I relapsed 2 yrs ago when my mom died rather unexpectedly.  I couldn't bare to feel the grief....she was my best friend and world....so I self-medicated.  I, too, used to visit the people at the center after I got out. I loved it there and all the things they taught me.  I had never felt better...physically OR mentally in my whole life!
You're absolutely right....no one looks down on you after rehab...they think you are so brave and strong...and you really are. :-)  I was very afraid of that because my husband was a Dr. in our small town so I was very visable rather I liked it or not.
My boys were 1,3 & 5....it was HARD to leave them, but, as you said, they bounced back and had a great childhood because they had a sober mom.
You're right...there isn't a lot of free time...but it's all good.  
Thank you so much for posting this.

[gizzy32]

Good post r2r, your daughter has come a long way since going. Good for you madison, that says something about how serious you are about your recovery. Ive never been to rehab, but know some that have and i think it can help tremendously. It's too bad it's so expensive in the U.S, most here are completely free. Rehab is not only for those actively using. Look into it and i am happy your family is being so supportive.

[road2recovery]

First of all , yes you are a month clean, and that is great!!  BUT I am a yr clean, and it is still hard...If you have a chance to go to a good rehab, Girl grab it....I am sure there are many here that just wished they had that chance...You have others to take care of your child, etc...GO!!  You said you don't want to slip, you are on a rollarcoaster ride...WHY not give this a shot? we are talking about your life...With the tools to use for a lifetime..I say go for it.....

[Madisonjsmom]

Thank you all so much for being ther for me, I love all of you and I am so thankful for each and everyone of you.  Thanks for all the PM's they really helped and the advice was wonderful!  Just wanted to say thanks!

[cathy5841]

R2R  two great post.  

madisonjsmom,
this is a choice for you and your family to make.  i am very proud of you for exploring all your options.  you know we are here for you...keep me posted....

[liscamdave]

Hmm...this is a tough one. I am not sure what you should do. I don't know if you are allowed to go to a rehab if you are already clean? Unless its for the depression? I know that if it were me, and I had the chance to go, I would 100%, no doubt in my mind, GO. I think that if you can't do this alone and you know you need the help and your family is supporting you, by all means sweetie...go....Get your life back..You deserve it...

I hope it works out for you.

Lisa

[HelpinUtah]

You know what I think.  Any decision you choose that works for you, I support 100%.  You're a strong person and either way you will make it through the difficult days.  I believe in you and know you can do this no matter how you do it.  You've become very dear to me and I'm so thankful you have a supporting family!!!

I love ya!!!

[avisg]

Well here is my thought she has only been clean for 30 days. How long was she using 30 clean days is great but its not much . She has not learned any skills to stay clean long term.rehab will help here learn some tools to do so .

[Madisonjsmom]

Eight years off and on, more on than off.

[trikkinikki]

I went to detox 2 weeks ago. It was the hardest and best thing I have ever done. I am now in an intensive out patient program. If you are clean you may find detox and inpatient rehab redundant...if you have insurance or a good doctor call them and find out about a out patient program. There are meetings to go to and individual sessions with a counselor...If you feel that going into a facility is right for you do not hesitate or overthink your decision. You know what you need if you really think about it. You daughter will understand. I have two girls, 16 and 10..they were my motivation and cheering section. I did and do have some serious negative people who have looked down on me for going to rehab, but that is just their problem. Depression is because your brain is healing from the damage done to it by the meds. You have to understand this is part of the process and legitimate. Talk to a doctor is my personal opinion. That is what I did...but no one can answer this for you. This is a decision for you and your husband to make. I am here for you and am praying you make it thru this tough time...

[cathy5841]

she is not talking about detoxing.  she is talking about a rehab...short for rehabilitation....teaching one to rehabilitate their life after drugs.              

[laurel453]

oh, please, it's time to put your needs first, you have to save yourself and nobody's going to do it for you. If you think you need it, go...just go, give it a try because you've been struggling with a lot of issues ( if i may give my opinion to you ) and that's really hard , you've been  given a chance of finding help with this fight and if you need  it , take it.

[avisg]

yes you dont undo 8 years of use in 30 days

[grimgirl]

I say GO and DO IT.....I think it is awesome.....I wish I could go...and it is wonderful to have your entire family behind you...  I am very proud of you....you are a very strong person.   Trust me, I know how devastaing depression can be....been fighting it my whole life....but the depression after detox....must be unbelievable...I think that is exactly what keeps me from getting totally clean....the thought of another major depression episode in my life makes be tremble inside...what a wuss..huh????  Thats why I say you are STRONG.........like Nike says....JUST DO IT!!!!!  LOL

[cathy5841]

Nauty,  meetings are great and i do advocate aftercare...sure most get sick of hearing me say it, lol....here is the thing with rehab,  it is not a hospital setting first of all.  it is a controlled setting...they have na/aa meetings every day and night.  on top of that you get intensive one on one therapy, as well intensive therapy for your family.  who here would not benifit from that???  you learn much more in a rehab than going to na meetings, problem is most cant afford it.  i do not think that all ppl need rehab, however i am great friends with madionjsmom and due to that fact i know some things about her i cant and wont discuss here, but i think...IMHO...she could benefit from it.

dont be mad nauty...its just my opinion.  and you did ask.  lol

[avisg]

Meetings will be great and they can help sustain her once she has a better foundation and rehab will give her more of a foundation .I think the most important thing is that this is what she wants as long as she is open to it it can be an invaluable tool.

[road2recovery]

I totally agree with both of you...AA and NA are both great , but they don't give you the one on one or the tools like rehab....
Off course madisonmom, we wish you the best with your decision..We stand behind you no matter what you decide...
As far as "stealing a bed"? hmmm I think you can go to jail for that!!!  
Best of luck
r2r

[NautyOne]

Yes, absolutely......I have to agree with all of you that rehab. Is a wonderful option for Madison......she and I have had many discussions about this and i you are still "wondering"  I think rehab is probably your best choice, as from what you tell me, also continued support through Na, AA, or PA after inpatient, and of course all of the support here from all the wonderful people here is a Great Idea!!!


I wish you well in your freedom from addiction.

Luv,
Nauty...........

[VicoMom]

I think that what your family is offering is a wonderful opportunity...

This has to be your decision. You have been given some good advice here about what rehab has to offer and even if you have been clean for a pretty good chunk of time... Rehabilitation definitely has more to offer than a Bed to sweat and thrash about in... It's not just about detoxing your body... It's about helping you understand why you use and teaching yourself different reactions to the situations that would usually be triggers.

Don't let other people discourage you if this is what you want to do.

Best of luck to you and sending good vibes and stuff your way ~