If You Have A Sec - Hiskidd ? About 1 A Week

[hiskidd]

Hi all. I just had a quick question or two or three. I have had a pretty bad last couple of days of pain. I met with a friend last week and among the many things we talked about, he told me about his wife's chronic pain, and that she takes about 1/2 of a Vicadin a day for it. He went on to tell me that he couldn't do that because one will lead to two to three to oxy to heroin and so on. He is a pretty wise recovering addict with his own tax business. He's really turned his life around the past decade or more.

Anyway, when he heard that the first thing I've been are as far as these narcs is oxy (two 20mgs two times a day for 12 mos, and then doc bumped me up to two 30mgs a day for a month), and that I stopped 28 days ago, etc., he told me the following:

"Well, I'm not telling you what to do, especially if you feel God told you to stop taking them, but if you're in chronic pain every day, I don't see anything wrong with you going the way you're going for 6 days and then giving yourself a 1 day break where you take 1 oxy a week." He went on to say if I took 1 a week, I WOULD NOT go through withdrawals.

I thought about if for a while that day, but wondered what if I became obsessed with that 1 day, and what if my pain was bad on Sat and then again on Tuesday? What if I wasn't strong enough even if I had my wife hold/hide the pills.

I wanted to know your take on his theory/advice. As a recovering addict and friend, I don't think he would have suggested something if he thought it had a chance at a full blown addiction. But I know I'm not special in any way.

I also know you guys told me I would have some days where I would take two steps back, etc.

[hiskidd]

Thanks, Gnarly. I'll pick it up today, cause I do feel groggy every morning.

[gnarly_1]

try the sleepytime tea im telling you you wont go back and theirs no hangovers with it ether
a lot of the sleep aids contain benadrill and it can leave you grogy in the morning...Gnarly

[hiskidd]

Rick, yes I've had three acupuncture treatments, and felt that they were working. Kinda pricey, so I have to spread the treatments out. What was cool, was when I went to see the pain management doc last week for the first time, he asked about accu and was recommending it. In fact, he said they have an acupuncturist on site! So yes, I want it to be more consistent, but have to build it in my budget... Thanks for the reminder though.

Hi Mof5 :) Yes, legs will even kick out some nights! Today I kinda laxed on it, but I've been faithful to the treadmill (mostly walking, but sometimes jogging), and the consistent 20 minutes has helped legs, back, brain!!! and so on. In fact, I felt my anxiety this evening, and now I'm remembering how I didn't walk today. Hmmm... So, how have you been doing. 28 days is SOOOOOOOOOOOOO awesome. Remember, my pain doc says we may feel like we're in WD's for 2-3 mos. He was very encouraging about things. Gave me a non-addictive pain patch that has worked well for a few nights my pain flared up. (I know it is non-addictive because he was beaming about how great it was that I was off oxy. He didn't even want to discuss narcotics with me. I respected him for that).

Anyway, I'm going to cut the dose of my OTC sleeping pills in half this week and try the tea on the weekend. Gotta get the sleep during the week. At least some. I hope WE ALL have a great week!

[mommyoffive0529]

Hey sweetie are you still having muscle pain...im at 28 days and my muscles in my arms and legs really hurt...ugh

[quitinoxys]

David have you given the acupuncture treatments or yoga a try yet? The last time I posted you I explained how they did and do work for me. My PM doctor was also happy that I quit taking oxys through my own volition but he still helped me find alternative methods of pain relief. Granted I am NOT pain free but the techniques I have learned has helped me immensely. Please keep on researching an alternitive that WILL help you as you may find one that works for you as I did. I will pray that God gives you the guidance the find the answers you need. God Bless---Rick

[hiskidd]

Hi friends... Tossed and turned last night for about 2.5 hours, and finally gave in to a sleep aid. OTC, but still felt like a "loss." Anyway, when I can, I'll try the sleepy time tea. I tried just Melatonin last night, but to no avail. Body is still not all the way I guess.

Anyway, it is encouraging you all are still here. Still feeling blah sometimes, and worried, and, and, and... You know how it goes. But, I do still keep adding to my clean time, and for that I am grateful.

Love you guys. David

[laurel453]

well said, katrina... firm about the choice, flexible about the approach... Good night, David :)

[Katrina81]

Just stopping in to check on ya. I hope your asleep right now. I cant sleep myself tonite. Just waiting for the melatoning to kick in and sipping my sweet dreams tea. The one thing i have learned is to stand FIRM in your choice (for us thats getting clean) and to be FLEXIBLE in your approach. So its tril and error on what works for pain and sleep and fatigue and on and on. You get my drift. Well im rambling. I hope your doing ok. Hang in there my friend. Your doing great.

[gnarly_1]

Hey David....it may take a few night to transition  over to otc stuff it takes the brain a few  days to adjust thats perfectly normal as far as sleep aids walmart carys some stuff call sleepytime tea you get it where the othere teas are sold they make a regular and one called extra that one has some vlarian mixed in but out of everything I have tried that seams to work the best for me usually in 1/2 hr your ready to sleep after you drink some
good luck tonight I pray you get some sleep....sleep can be one of the most challenging parts of getting clean...good luck and God bless.....Gnarly    

[hiskidd]

Gonna try to sleep without an OTC sleep aid tonight. Here is to hope. When you have hope, you have everything.

[tired_of_oxy]

I think it's that reason that in NA or AA they really push 90 meetings in 90 days because it really takes that long for the body and the brain in particular to heal. Makes sense. Your doing awesome and I really think your doing amazing in your recovery. The "tone" of your posts has changed so much in just a short time. You sound far more optimistic and happy and making a lot of progress, even taking the rough days in stride. I'm so happy for you! your an awesome guy with a heart of gold and deserve all the wonderful things God has planned for you.

[hiskidd]

Hey, I hope this helps someone. I saw a pain management doc for the first time yesterday. He seemed thrilled I got off of oxy on my own. He says there are a lot of changes with how that stuff is prescribed now... anyway, one of the most profound things he said was that I may feel like I'm in WDs for 2-3 months. I'm sure that's not new news on the site, but he said if very confidently and instead of looking at it negatively, I thought about trying to see it positively like everyone tell us - IT WILL GET BETTER and THERE IS STILL TIME TO HEAL. So Mommy and I and Kuckma and Tired ofoxy and everyone else still have time to get better.

Bad day today, but at least it's over and I can be in pain and fatigued at home :) David

[hiskidd]

I need to write this kind of stuff in my journal, but I woke up this morning feeling really bad over everything in my life and really bad over what Kuckma and so many others are going through. I really wanted "pills to feel numb too." I don't like my job or school. Actually I have a "first job" that I love, but doesn't pay the bills, and a second full time job of teaching, that pays most of the bills (we still struggle), but I don't love and dread coming too. I know I should be grateful and I am blessed, but getting my body and mind to "go with" what I know over what I feel is such a struggle. I do miss the high from oxy. It gave me "painless" days AND energy AND a fake joy.

Sorry for the babble.

[Katrina81]

Im glad you seem to have decided not to try that. I was in a car wreck about a week ago. 4 broken ribs dislocated shoulder and whiplash. Not fun ****! When i was in the er i refused narcotic pain meds and got a shot of toradol in the hinder. it worked great but of course wore off. my ma came to take care of my kids and myself. the er dr sent me home with a script for thirty ten mg percocets. my ma got them filled. i wanted NOTHING to do with them but was in so much pain i took half of one then the next day the other half. it did nothing 4 the pain but it gave me the high which scared the hell outa me. i flushe the remaining 29. i knew right then i can never just do 1 or 2. NEVER. back to the toradol. have u ever asked about that? they do make it in pill form. maybe something 2 check out. stay strong buddy. your doing great!

[gnarly_1]

hey  dude It sounds like you found the right answer and your going to go down the right path
all I got to add is 1 is to many and 1000 not enough keep pushing forward David you will get past this good luck and God bless......Gnarly

[hiskidd]

Oh, and (sorry for the additional post) I have advil, aleve, etc. Aleve seems to do nothing, and I really can't tell much with advil either. I keep hearing their are prescription pain killers that are non-narcotic, but I feel like if they worked, we'd all have been taking those instead :) Today just felt like my the part of my spine where my back meets my neck was just bone on bone.

[hiskidd]

Everyone - I read every word. I'm so tired right now, but my pain is a little better. Today was kind of a high stress day and the third day I had my three kids (6, 4, and 2) all to myself :) as mommy was at a womens' retreat (she deserves it after nursing me to health for 3 weeks and raising our kids).

Anyway... what I did around 6 was get on the treadmill for 20 minutes. I should say dragged myself. I didn't push myself - have been able to jog some days - so I only walked, but I worked up a bit of a sweat. I got off feeling stronger in my mind which seemed to translate to my body.

ANY anyway... I'm glad you all are in agreement. The idea wasn't a pill that lasted all week, but almost like a "reward" of 6 days pain, and 1 day of "pain free euphoria" and then start fresh on the 6 day journey again. BUT BUT BUT, I do agree with what you have all said. I'm just really glad you said it because when my wife got home a bit ago, I told her I was considering Jim's idea, and she said "You don't want to do that... can I rub your back? Go rest..." etc. She's a keeper :)

Thank you guys. Thank you doesn't seem strong enough, but it's all I can do in faceless cyberspace :) If you ever post thinking these things don't impact, rebuke that thought and post anyway. This site has made a huge difference, and it matters that YOU care enough about "the least of these" to take time to share your hearts. I'm tired, but encouraged.

In His Grip,
David

[throwindatowl]

Have you done all the natural stuff for your pain. You know stretching, the hot tub, otc meds. An addict cant just take one when they need it. Now having someone else in control then that would be the best chance. You give an addict a full bottle of pills nothing good comes from it. The guy  that told you that doesnt take any pills I can almost guarantee you that. He cant take just one. Why does he think you can. Youve proven to yourself you cant anyway. I do wish they had something to numb just the pain not your soul too. Im sorry they dont.

[petroglyph54]

HK, you talking yourself into another round of hell. It's as simple as that. You know and I know and everybody here knows your tolerance to 20mg, quickly becomes 40 and then 80 and then the sky's the limit. Then, they won't provide pain relief at all no matter how much you take. Would you rather quit, because eventually if you live you will want to quit, [whoops there's that your kids might need ya thingy], at 20 mg or 200mg [like me] or just stay quit and find something that works enough and find a balance, with life and function and our constant companion, pain and addiction? I hope you give it some more time, you've come so far. Best wishes hk

[ImDONENoMore]

I'm so sorry you're suffering with so much pain.  Have you tried any of the OTC pain meds?  Some are better than others and some are designed specifically for certain kinds of pain.

And I have a feeling you already know the answer to your question.  Please don't misunderstand me as I think I understand what you're going through - especially when you start to get some real time under your belt, that seems to be the time we all start second guessing our decision, thinking we can go back and only use sometimes or when we're in pain.  Only from what I've seen and read, the success rate for going back to this behavior and somehow making it "work" this time around seems to be really low.  Remember, if we had that kind of discipline to only take pain meds when absolutely necessary, we wouldn't be here in the first place (at least I think that's the case for many of us).  Listen to your heart, because I think it already has the answer to your question.

I wish you the best and hang in there.  Let me know what OTC stuff you've tried - I have pretty bad OA and get a lot relief with aleve, motrin, excedrin, heating pads and hot showers - maybe this will help you too?  Please, reconsider what your friend has told you.  You've come so far. :)

[mommyoffive0529]

Believe me when i tell you i have thought about doing the same damn thing but i really want to try and make it work...for my kids and me and i have been in pain for days and day and to top it all off..i have tmj pain from all the anxiety so i am miserable...i took 800 motrin today and it helped a bit...try to not do it...its all up to you but try not to...i'm so weak right now too...i dropped off all my pills to my friend so i am not tempted...we will survive!!

[dede2121]

maybe your friend means well in his suggestions but, my suggestion would be not to start down that road again. you should all too well know that one a week will not be enough. do you really think you could do that and stick to it? and besides what would one a week do for you if you are in pain on a daily basis. i have never heard of a pain pill that lasts all week.
i guess i would go see a doctor and see what other options he may have for your pain.
i think if you start on that one a week thing you are setting yourself up for failure.

[jstntime]

I have lots of experience with this one.  For me.....just one becomes just 10 by the next day.

If you are an addict, that advice is reckless and dangerous and a quick way to become a full time user again.

Don't do it, bad bad advice.

bob