In for a rough day, I think

[Pat1956100]

I took my last 2 percs 48 hours ago.  Yup if you have them you will take them.  I have never been able to flush.  They are way too expensive.  I still haven't even paid for them yet so I couldn't flush them.
I did a quick taper so I guess I am officially starting day 3.  I know my tracker says day 2 but my body says day 3.
I will not call for any more percs.  
I will not be a stupid jerk.
I will not ever do this again.
because I like this new Pat I am.

I still am feeling so strong about this and so happy.  I spoke with all my family yesterday because they called for my birthday and it just made me feel so strong.  We talked about my future, selling my house and moving and I have all their support.  It just felt so good to be clean.  Everyone said how GOOD I sounded.
Just need to get through this and get my energy back.  So much to do.

[Dane74]

First off i want to say that i am very proud of you for listening to all of us and absorbing all the information that you are receiving.  I just love the fact that you are open to go to rehab, that is a major step in the right direction.  It's time Pat for you to take charge of your life and tomorrow is they day that you make calls and inquire about all of this, put as much effort into your sobriety that you did for your DOC and you will be amazed.  Also, please change your number!!!! Way too many people (bad people) have it and one day you will be weak and you will receive a call and then what?  I am not being harsh or snotty here Pat, i just want to see you succeed and i know you want it, and you are almost there.  I remember so vividly when i was in your shoes 6 months ago, and i know how scared i was, and everyone kept pushing me, like we are doing for you, and PAt i am forever thankful for that push, i would never be were i am today without my friends on here.

[Pat1956100]

Okay, I'm going to phone him back and tell him I am clean and don't want him to phone anymore.

I did it.  I told him I was clean and staying clean.  He said "Atta Girl" and okay I won't bug you anymore.
Another one off the list.

[Pat1956100]

Thanks sweety, I want it badly.

[ImDONENoMore]

The first "no" is always the hardest... just do it, pat, f him... he couldn't care less if you're well, he only cares how much money you have in your pocket.. . walk away from this pat, this is BAD for you... move on............... you're better than this but YOU  have to believe that first for it to matter.. just DO it and say NO.  Oh, and then block that no...

[Sonrissa]

Simply unbelievable! I'm glad you stayed strong! I feel ashamed to say I doubt I would have! You will get through this Pat! Your strength is amazing!

[Pat1956100]

OMG, a dealer just called.  He hasn't called in weeks.  Why now?
I was a coward and didn't answer the phone and tell him I'm done.  He left a message and I haven't checked it but I will now.
Okay all he said was give me a shout if you want, meaning if I want percs. He won't harass me.  He always calls me first when he gets them because they are hard to get.  He will have no trouble selling them elsewhere or so he always said.
It didn't even produce cravings. Just scared me a little.  It felt intrusive.
I just want to be left alone.