Is he on meth again?

[Brandyg16]

Long story short.... My husband, 44, has been on and off drugs since his teens. Recently I have found pipes, straws and meth. Every time I confront him about it he says that it some from a long time ago and he found it. That could very well be true because we have been cleaning out the shed but my gut tells me no but at the same time I don't want to accuse him of doing something he isn't doing. So my question is what do I do? If he is using I want to get him help. I don't want to get him in trouble with his job, involve friends and family, or ruin our marriage. I just want to get him help if he really does have a problem.

[clean_in_ks]

They are different organizations.  Al-Anon was founded for those living with alcoholism, but these days, people living with any type of addiction are welcome because the disease is the same whether it's drugs or alcohol (and alcohol is considered a drug/mind altering substance).
Nar-Anon was founded for those living with someone who is addicted to drugs.  There are A LOT more Al-Anon meetings than Nar-Anon.  Try googling and you'll probably find one in your area.

Yes, it's hard not to make the details of their addiction our own, but when we learn we are powerless over another person, it becomes much easier to live with peace in your home.

[Brandyg16]

Thank you!

[clean_in_ks]

I hope you find an Al-Anon meeting soon.  One of the things you will learn is that all your "monitoring" and "checking up on him" are obsessions you must let go of.  Finding straws all over the place is a sign he is using.....no matter what he tells you.  Addicts = Dishonesty  He has to be the one to WANT help and ASK for it.  It's not something you can do for him. Al-Anon will give you tools to use when living with an addict.    

[Brandyg16]

I know I need to stop, I just feel damned if I do and damned if I don't. I feel like if I just let it go and don't do anything then I am ignoring it and it will get worse but at the same time I don't want to accuse him of doing something he isn't even though I feel 90% sure he is. Is it al-anon or nar-anon that I need to find? I checked on the nar-anon website and it didn't show any in my area. I guess that could just be because they are not all registered with that website maybe?

[Brandyg16]

I wish I could post a picture so that you would know exactly what I am talking about but anyway... A while back we had a wedding reception for my daughter and we got some of those decorative drinking straws. They are hard straws but are wrapped in some type of paper. You can bend them but when you do they don't close off, just put a kink in them. I keep finding those. I found one in his truck, shop and on a shelf in the top of the closet. Any ideas what that could that be used for? I thought all the straws they used for meth were short

[jifmoc]

Yay! Good for you. Let us know how it goes:)

[jifmoc]

Go to alanon. Everyone in there is affected by a loved one's drinking and using. It's your job to feel sane and serene, despite what the addict is doing. For now, if you don't know what to do, do nothing. The answers will become clearer if you're patient. Please check out meetings in your area. The relief you will start to feel is so worth it.

[gg636]

You are not alone! Prayers going up!

[Brandyg16]

Thank y'all so much! I will see if there are any meetings in our area. Surely there are

[gg636]

Yes - Please find meetings or maybe Church support. I will be doing the same for different reasons.

[trecutter1]

Trust your gut!!!

[Brandyg16]

Thank you for replying! I've always heard that and normally do but I guess I just keep hoping I'm wrong because I do know how to handle it

[jerry4664]

Brandy.. if your asking us you already know the answer.. if you have been with him since a teen you know the answer..if your finding stuff that you know is part of his kit you know the answer... find strength in yourself and have him test or just save the headache and confront him with those hard questions and if he is lying then things are not good and see if treatment is the answer.. best wishes