Over the past year, I've noticed some weird behaviors with my sister. she is almost 30 years old, married and has three children. She has had a past involving drug usage and her husband has always had a problem. Needless to say, her husband is NOT a favorite of the family. Anyway, about a year ago, I noticed while having conversations with my sister, that she would just sort of "dissapear" while we were speaking ( this was on the phone). Then, when she was visiting, she would, in mid sentence, just sort of slowly stop talking... her eyes would close, her mouth would hang open, and she would just sort of freeze like that for a few seconds. I mentioned to our mother that I thought she was on something and when mentioned to my sister, she came up with this elaborate story about a brain tumor that makes her have these "ticks". Not very surprisingly, nothing else came of this "tumor".
She is ALWAYS sick. I can't remember when I've seen her in the past year that she doesn't have some sort of cold that she says is her allergies. My mother works at a doctors office, and my sister has been there and has been told that she has the flu etc... is that all it is, or is it really a side effect of some type of drug? Surely if she's using anything her immune system would not be quite up to par? I don't know much about drugs and their effects.. I haven't ever been around anyone using anything other than drinking or marijauna or pills ( my sister).
I've been reading about the signs, and some definetly describe her to a T, where others don't sound anything like her. She takes a lot of care about her appearance ( even if it doesn't always work as well as she thinks it does:) ), she doesn't steal, has no trouble holding her job, which she has had for a very long time, doesn't get moody or irritable ( but I'm not around her very often, either), makes future plans..... but on the other end, slurred speech, seeming to "fall asleep" during speaking, rambling on and talking excessively, moments of alternating ups and downs... one minute she'll be gabbing a hundrend miles a minute and power cleaning my house, then she'll be down and looking like she's only half awake. Borrowing money ( but has an excuse since her husband can't hold a job and they need help with bills). She seems to have no idea that she is doing any of these things, coming to birthday parties and family gatherings acting like she is compleatly normal, when it is VERY obvious that something is not right wiht her.
My husband owns his own buisness and one of his recent employees is a friend of my sisters husband. Apparently they were discussing this and the friend said that they were using herione and have been for a very long time. My husband said not to mention this to my mother because it would get back and they would know who said something... he doesn't want drama started with his employee. However, this is my sister! How can I sit and do nothing? I'm going to have to figure out a way to approach this, with either my sister or my mother... she has children that she puts in danger everytime she puts them in a vehicle, if she is really using... these are my nephews! What if something happens to her or worse, her children, because of this and I did nothing?
I don't want to do anything until I've had some opinions on wether or not anyone thinks this is heroine use.. I definetly don't want to get everyone stressed and worried if this isn't what's going on. I'm open to any opinions and/or suggestions on if this is heroine usage, and if so how to go about approaching the subject and to whom. My sister? My mother? I'm just so confused and sick to my stomach. I'm actually feeling nausous and teary eyed just thinking there is even a possibility. I just feel that if there is that there is nothing I can do.
It's hard to say, she could just be taking alot of opiates or something. You will always come out the loser in battles likes these. Even though your intentions are the best and for her children, you will still be labled the trouble maker. If it becomes clear to you or your mom that H is involved then that is different, just make sure you have your own eyes to prove it and tke no ones word for it.
I am the mom of a very heavy oxy abuser, and when oxy wasn't available she would use H in addition to a lot of other drugs....... MY personal experience with my child, she worked for a bank, not the best for an oxy addict........ but she quit her job, quit college, her appearance was pathetic, she lost sooo much weight and I would have to beg her just to shower, she didn't nod off in mid sentence but her pupils were like pin needles. As her addiction got more out of control, so did she and it was obvious to all that knew her.....It is surprising that your sis has not been confronted at work, usually hard core users cant control the nod off or speech for 9 hrs at work........ If you can have a candid conversation with her, then please try to do so, try to find out what is really going on with her, not assumptions, but is she an addict or not? Keep her babies in mind, they need to be in a safe place and if their mother is using, you need to be their voice while or until she decides to get help.
I am no doctor, but are you sure she doesn't have an alcohol problem? With oxy or H stealing is almost like breathing, for my kid anyway, emotions were all over the place and normally she was this angry/irritable person I didn't know.... not her nature at all. I wish you could just talk to your sis, but in my humble opinion she is not a heavy H or oxy user, or else as my child she is great at hiding it..... but only for a while and soon all the walls will come falling down.
Good luck dear let us know how she and you are doing.
I have a good friend that was shooting oxycontin and using heroin and would do exactly as you said. We'd be mid conversation and her eyes would just shut and mouth would hang open. That nodding out is usually a sign. I use oxycontin, an opiate like heroin, and i can hide it very well. If it weren't for my pupils I don't think anyone WOULD EVER know. I also don't steal from people. If you do try to talk to her you should try and come from an understanding, caring, and non judgemental point of view that is assumption free, otherwise it will just cause her to become defensive and shut down. If she is just denying it then maybe you could try to make it about her kids and not her, something she really cares about. But, i am new to all of this and only 19 so what i am saying is just my opinion..
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