Aa
I've I've made it 60 days
Hello everyone... I want to thank everyone that helped save my life. Without your support i wouldn't be able to say Im sixty days clean from my oxycontin. I want to personally thank Vikki ricart lulu dominosarah dane70 texaslady opiategirl Gnarly ibekleen jaybay addicted2long kitty and everyone that reached out to help. I was a mess.
My addiction started in 04 with my husbands head on collision. While he was in the hospital he kindly spit out a roxie for me. He told me to take it to calm down and sleep. He suffered over 23 broken bones internal bleeding. He flatlined twice. It was so stressful. He stayed in the hospital for two months then another two months in a physical therapy rehab center. He learned how to walk again. And worked on his memory. He had three major concussions which resulted in memory loss. He told the paramedics he was from Idaho. Single with no kids. The paramedics knew him so they knew he had a family. And called his mother who we were visiting for Christmas. I will never forget that dreadful day Jan 3 2004. We only had two suitcases for all of us. Him and our two kids who were 5 and 12 at the time. Nobody knew we were gonna get a divorce when we returned home Florida.
I didn't know how we were gonna live. I mean where we were gonna stay. We had no money etc. Thru donations that the community gave and many churches around the area we managed. We had a huge response due to the magnitude of the collision as well as it was a result from a rouge cop on the force.
He was prescribed heavy duty painkillers and needed them at the time. His face was reconstructed. Hip dislocated. Shoulder dislocated nine broken ribs. He's lucky to be alive. Let alone walk again and now works fulltime with his own business. Miracles do happen.
Well he always shared his medicine with me. He thought it was a good idea to keep me calm. I numbed up from the stress and trudged along. I never thought id develop an addiction. Never.
Fast forward to 06 and i fell off a ladder 10-12 feet high onto hardwood floors. I was helping him paint. And back then i was the trim person. Well my fall resulted in jammed up wrists. One was broken and a cracked knee cap and torn acl and meniscus damage. That injury resulted in me getting my own pain pills. Now we had a double supply. At that time i would take 10-20 Loratabs a day. Along with any other pill i.could score. I loved the way the pills covered all my pain. Both emotional.and physical. Well three surgeries later. I wound up in pain management. I was already addicted. Bad. So when the doctor offered me oxycontin i was in heaven.
My daughter slid into second base wrong during a softball game and broke her foot and popped her hip out of place. It took the doctors a couple of months to.figure out she also popped her hip out of place because all she complained about was her foot and knee. She had three major hip surgeries when she was 10 years old.
Sometimes surgeries looked like she was doing well so i had a hystorectomy i put off only to wind up taking care of her thru another surgery. Also had my knee scope and after i got my stitches out she had another emergency surgery. Her hip would just pop out. No warning what so ever. Those were some hard times.
Well i finally broke down and had a knee replacement may 19 2011. I wanted the pain to.stop in my knees. I had some complications and fought really hard thru this one.
When i went thru the surgery the doctors doubled my oxycontin dose. And added roxies for break thru. I was already hooked on them. Now i was doubley hooked.
I would run out and score more pills or swap with my husband. When we were out id get so sick id have to score anything to keep on keeping on. Everyone i knows gets some sort of pain pills. Sister in law would sell hers to my husband than yell at him. Everyone has pills here in Alabama. Its sad but true.
I found you all when i was researching knee replacement complications. I took a peak at the addiction forum and read everyone's stories for days. Then i asked questions trying to justify my use of pills. People stepped forward and asked questions and shared their story with me.
I started to get honest because nobody knew me. Sometimes it easier to talk to strangers. Especially ones with a similar problem.
Everyone convinced me to flush my pills. High anxiety followed. I was a wreck. I went thru depression. Became suicidal and homicidal. All my anger i pushed deep down surfaced. All the emotions i hid with pills came raging up out of me. I was truly overwhelmed.
Then i had another surgery. Because of torn ligaments and blood clots. I was so high on oxies i couldn't feel my skin. I worked my fanny off to.get full range of my knee. And worked harder to.get off the pills.
My addiction was so bad compared to Alot of people here. But i made it thru. I double detox because of the surgery. Grrr. I was so sick. Both physically and mentally.
I.encourage everyone to get off the pain pills unless you really need them. They are a one way street to a dead end. Yes i have pain. Somedays its awful. But my mind is clear. I went to.rehab detox. Now i go to out patient aftercare. I attend na meetings. I have an addiction pain management therapist. With a lot of work Im off the junk. I know i am always one second away from relapseing. But i won't walk backwards again.
Thank you all.for saving my life. Miracles do happen. Im living proof. Thru you all and our lord Jesus i am 60 days clean of oxycontin. If i can help anyone i will. I extend my hand to every new person. I want everyone who wants off the pills to know if i can do it so can you.
My addiction started in 04 with my husbands head on collision. While he was in the hospital he kindly spit out a roxie for me. He told me to take it to calm down and sleep. He suffered over 23 broken bones internal bleeding. He flatlined twice. It was so stressful. He stayed in the hospital for two months then another two months in a physical therapy rehab center. He learned how to walk again. And worked on his memory. He had three major concussions which resulted in memory loss. He told the paramedics he was from Idaho. Single with no kids. The paramedics knew him so they knew he had a family. And called his mother who we were visiting for Christmas. I will never forget that dreadful day Jan 3 2004. We only had two suitcases for all of us. Him and our two kids who were 5 and 12 at the time. Nobody knew we were gonna get a divorce when we returned home Florida.
I didn't know how we were gonna live. I mean where we were gonna stay. We had no money etc. Thru donations that the community gave and many churches around the area we managed. We had a huge response due to the magnitude of the collision as well as it was a result from a rouge cop on the force.
He was prescribed heavy duty painkillers and needed them at the time. His face was reconstructed. Hip dislocated. Shoulder dislocated nine broken ribs. He's lucky to be alive. Let alone walk again and now works fulltime with his own business. Miracles do happen.
Well he always shared his medicine with me. He thought it was a good idea to keep me calm. I numbed up from the stress and trudged along. I never thought id develop an addiction. Never.
Fast forward to 06 and i fell off a ladder 10-12 feet high onto hardwood floors. I was helping him paint. And back then i was the trim person. Well my fall resulted in jammed up wrists. One was broken and a cracked knee cap and torn acl and meniscus damage. That injury resulted in me getting my own pain pills. Now we had a double supply. At that time i would take 10-20 Loratabs a day. Along with any other pill i.could score. I loved the way the pills covered all my pain. Both emotional.and physical. Well three surgeries later. I wound up in pain management. I was already addicted. Bad. So when the doctor offered me oxycontin i was in heaven.
My daughter slid into second base wrong during a softball game and broke her foot and popped her hip out of place. It took the doctors a couple of months to.figure out she also popped her hip out of place because all she complained about was her foot and knee. She had three major hip surgeries when she was 10 years old.
Sometimes surgeries looked like she was doing well so i had a hystorectomy i put off only to wind up taking care of her thru another surgery. Also had my knee scope and after i got my stitches out she had another emergency surgery. Her hip would just pop out. No warning what so ever. Those were some hard times.
Well i finally broke down and had a knee replacement may 19 2011. I wanted the pain to.stop in my knees. I had some complications and fought really hard thru this one.
When i went thru the surgery the doctors doubled my oxycontin dose. And added roxies for break thru. I was already hooked on them. Now i was doubley hooked.
I would run out and score more pills or swap with my husband. When we were out id get so sick id have to score anything to keep on keeping on. Everyone i knows gets some sort of pain pills. Sister in law would sell hers to my husband than yell at him. Everyone has pills here in Alabama. Its sad but true.
I found you all when i was researching knee replacement complications. I took a peak at the addiction forum and read everyone's stories for days. Then i asked questions trying to justify my use of pills. People stepped forward and asked questions and shared their story with me.
I started to get honest because nobody knew me. Sometimes it easier to talk to strangers. Especially ones with a similar problem.
Everyone convinced me to flush my pills. High anxiety followed. I was a wreck. I went thru depression. Became suicidal and homicidal. All my anger i pushed deep down surfaced. All the emotions i hid with pills came raging up out of me. I was truly overwhelmed.
Then i had another surgery. Because of torn ligaments and blood clots. I was so high on oxies i couldn't feel my skin. I worked my fanny off to.get full range of my knee. And worked harder to.get off the pills.
My addiction was so bad compared to Alot of people here. But i made it thru. I double detox because of the surgery. Grrr. I was so sick. Both physically and mentally.
I.encourage everyone to get off the pain pills unless you really need them. They are a one way street to a dead end. Yes i have pain. Somedays its awful. But my mind is clear. I went to.rehab detox. Now i go to out patient aftercare. I attend na meetings. I have an addiction pain management therapist. With a lot of work Im off the junk. I know i am always one second away from relapseing. But i won't walk backwards again.
Thank you all.for saving my life. Miracles do happen. Im living proof. Thru you all and our lord Jesus i am 60 days clean of oxycontin. If i can help anyone i will. I extend my hand to every new person. I want everyone who wants off the pills to know if i can do it so can you.
Congrats mate you've done so well be proud huni you've done a amazing job you give me strength andhope that we can beat this much love from ya mate in oz fpv xoxoxoxoxo
That's awesome bama! I'm so proud of you!
Yea, this forum was a god send! One day at a time!!!
Yea, this forum was a god send! One day at a time!!!
Ohhh noooo pity here.....it is just amazement on my part....I hope it didn't sound that way....just compared to my life and stuggles seeem petty against yours......amazement is all again you go girl!!!
I don't want you to feel pity for me. Because i draw Alot of strength from my life experiences. I look back and see a tradgity but i know Im stronger because of it. If i can survive that. I can survive anything. There is a happy ending. I am no longer using pills to cover up my pain. I am going to write a book about my life lol. To show people how to overcome obstacles in life. I wanted to share what and why i used for motivation only. I also wanted to show people who think their life is so low that you can overcome. So please no pity. Just congratulate me on.clean time and becoming a better person. Pity and sorrow don't accomplish anything. There's positives in this story. My husband lived. He's in rehab/detox rebuilding himself. My daughter is a true inspiration to people. She is in marching band. She stands still to play the xiolophone . She marches in parades with her crutch. Anything is possible when you set your mind to it. And always remember prayer and Jesus wants us to be a success.
Wow what a story....I am sooo sorry to hear about all your hardships....but I am sooo proud to hear of your accomplishment 60 days....you go girl!!!
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