Just found out 19 year old daughter shooting heroin

[Poohbear1234]

I been for last four months looking for signs she was using heroin but never saw any but then she moved out for 8 weeks with her boyfriend. Well two weeks ago she moved home and seemed fine was going to work and looked fine.
Well Yesterday she sleep for 15 hours then asked my boyfriend to open a package. She had her left arm bent up to her hair and I could see a red bump and all red around I grabed her arm and asked her if she was using and she said no its a rash. Later she put a sweat shirt on when are house was really warm. She was getting changed hours later so I went over and looked at her arm again and the red bump was gone but I could see little pin hole she said put lotion on it and rub it so it went away. I told her I know what she did and she didnt denie it. When I told her I was not dumb I know what she is doing she said I know your not. I asked her for her car keys cause its really my boyfriends but he gave it to her to drive usally. Usally she would get mad but she handed them over with no problem. I really dont think she has been shooting for long I did get out of her she has snorted it in the past she said not much but I dont beleive that cause of now using needles. She was alway scared of even having blood taken cause of an accident she had two years ago. Oh and now today she has only left her bed since 4am to go to bathroom and eat dinner been sleeping on and off and now telling me tonight her back hurts. Know she did not use cause I keep door open and I did my work in computer room accross from hers.
I told her she could not have the car if she is using and told her if she dont get help and get clean she would have to leave the house. I would hate to do that but dont want to enable her and I dont one day want to open her bedroom door and find her dead.
Am I doing the right thing.

[Poohbear1234]

Thanks gnarly. Had to try and get some sleep last night. My daughter is doing pretty good and i'm not going to tell her but i'm starting to think she is tell the truth of how much she used cause her withdrawls were not even as close to or as bad as I thought they would be and read about. They seemed more like when I was withdrawling from lortabs back in the day. Just sweating alot whole body hurting and depressed.
I made her go to work this morning so I drove her there at 7:30 eastern time lol since ur in az. She called me 4hrs later and said doing ok just really tired and feels sluggish. She will be talking with someone today when she is done work then she will meet up with them so they can decide what treatment she will be doing.
We talked alot yesterday. She seems very ashamed but that could be just cause she got caught. She didnt want the family to know cause she was affraid they would never want anything to do with her. I told her half already know and they will support her in getting help (matter fact my brother is going to take her to her first meeting that he goes too) and the family will respect her even more if she gets help and stays clean.
Did u read what I wrote yesterday the first place I called she didnt want to go there said lady there she bought from. Thats really sad and making a call today.

[gnarly_1]

HEY Poohbear....just wanted to check on you tonight....your across the country from me im in phoenix az and im usually on between 10 and midnight my time you where up last night dont know if your up tonight but I just wanted to encourage you and offer you some support
hows thigs going with your daughter tonight....she will be in acute withdrawal by now so things are probably ruff on your end....if you need to talk Ill be out here for a wile I hope and pray this will be the end to your ordeal good luck and God bless......Gnarly

[Poohbear1234]

Have to tell everyone what I found out today while i was calling to get her the help she needs. The one place I called first they would not see her until I clear up the ins. cause it shows she has her dads ins. and that would be the primary ins. He has not had a job or ins. for her in amost a year. Thats not the bad thing my daughter told me that there is a worker there that her friend took her to to buy heroin this past week. I told my boyfriend when he got home and he said it must be the same person that his friends wife told him his daughter use to get from before she died. She told him that before their daughter died that its ashame that where they took her for help someone there was selling to her after hours.

[IBKleen]

Hi Pooh,

She would have had those symptoms by now if it is a full two days. They always started with me within hours or at least day !.

I hope your daughter sticks to recovery and turns her life around. She is lucky to have you.

[Poohbear1234]

nikos i'm really sorry to hear about your mother!  What u were saying about fooling the clinics and ur family. I do understand that. My daughters friend did that many times over. She is now far away in rehab and just hope she is really trying and stays clean. I pray for her and long with my daughter and will u that u continue to stay clean. My boyfriend said same that she needs to find something she enjoys to keep her busy. He said he met a ex heroin addict that now is involved with motor cross and his religion.

I have read over and over that with her withdrawl she would be vomiting and or have diarrhea when does this usally start?  She dont have either and its day two.

[nikos74]

Something may exist for take her attention from this! Me i have past many clinics fuling my self and to my family and i deside to stop at 38! My life has gon! And im still fight now you can find there if you chearh,i take sub,but you are my mother! The mother i lost! We do something to see how bud this ease! Raw this posts and videos from the future cituation to see WHAT COMING!!! She mast waik!

[Jaybay]

God bless you Poohbear.  You are both doing a great job and I truly admire your strength and determination.  Those baby steps are going in the right direction and I pray it continues.  You're a great mom.  :-)

[Poohbear1234]

well the update on my daughter going thru withdrawl really bad, crying and very depressed. Brakes my hart crying myself. But I will not give in to her we were talking she knows I want her to be clean but she has to decide. Asked her if she wantted me to call dr. for help. Our ins. we would need to see him first. She said she dont want people to know her business I told her the whole family if dont know will know cause I want them to be aware and they will be there to help us both thru this. My one brother gave me alist of places and times to go to meetings for us. He still attends meetings reg. for last 3yrs. Wow have to go she just asked me if i'm going to call I'll keep u updated. Atleast step in right direction!

[nikos74]

Hello to the mother! I speak because i was use heroine for many years! You remind me my situation wich has not end yet! First of all i write to you because i lose my mother last year at 56 years old and you remind me her,i feel you like my mother! I live in Greece,here all the things is worst than anywhere i believe! In my story,first of all your girl must be say NO. If she dont whant it you cant do anything. Then i was going with her in a doc and ask him to prescribe some pain relief and some benzo,just for the wd. Its only 5 days story. Then she can take Nalorex-Naltraxone,so if she try again heroine then not feel it! She maby do that one,two times but at the end she stop it! And ofcource she need a doc to watch her every week maby and more! Or she can find some groups like N/A but i dont sugest N/A, she can find a small group to start going and speak with other past users,hear they storys of them and with your support and the rest family be ok. But one step at the time! Here we say "Just for today",and day by day i wish to make it and stay clean. Do not give her methadone or suboxone,because this things is worst that heroine. It is for stupid people like me ho i am 41 years and stil can fix my life! I have make many times bad to my self.till now i write inside from a bus,as going to take my suboxone! If she can say No! Then she will be ok very soon! Thats from me,i hope to help you alitle,im not a doc but a x-heroine user that i lose my mother,and you remind me! God bless as all...

[gnarly_1]

you can google N/A meetings also

[Poohbear1234]

also when I get up to drive her to work i'm going to come back and call local places to see where meetings in my area are

[Poohbear1234]

I know both sides my self use meth years ago until I got preg. and even know I quit lost my first son and have never used again. Then 16 yrs ago I was hit by a car and was taking lortabs 7.5mg then when oc's first came out I was on them taking 6 80mgs a day for 3yrs but I decided to get off them because of my childrens concerns. I two were put methadone after the oc's but was slowly taken off them but was only taking 10mgs a day. So I do now addiction and know there can be a better life quitting. I told her she would have to change where she goes and who she hangs out with. Just a few mins ago I checked up on her and really dont think she did anything today cause she said that she is hot then cold and I explaind to her that is withdrawl starting. Well its 3am really have to go try to get some sleep I thank u for all the support and i'll be back tomorrow or should say today.

[gnarly_1]

HI ya I been threw the drama also it goes in streaks there ok for a wile then back down again
but thats just how the desise of addiction is...untill where ready to admit where powerless over it and finely relise its not the substance thats the problem thats mearlly a symptom
it is the very way we think that needs to change...for me both N/A and A/A helped me put down the booze and everything recreational 5yr6mo ago its taken a substance abuse conslor a yr just to convince me I had a problem with methadone now coming up in 9 days I got a yr clean from that....I no addiction on both sided of the fence both living as an addict and as the parent of one...if you can get her to reach out for help you can learn to rethink
and live in recovery and life can become a beautiful place once again if all your doing is putting down the booze or the drugs...your a sober addict..or ''white knuckling'' your sobrity it rarely works long term if she is not comfortable going to n/a meetings most city/states have substance abuse consoling free threw the mental health care for that city or state you may want to check into it...you do need to change your playmates and playgrouds to get clean also...I love to shoot pool but to this day I cont go into a pool hall without setting off a hailstorm of cravings...I had to give it up.....you have to be willing to do whatever its goinmg to take to get yourself clean theres no doing it half a s s ed
I wish you luck with her...we had to do the tuff love thing to...and its not ez..for us it was going to a court and my wife writing the judge a letter to go hard on our daughter we are trying to keep her alive...threw the yrs we got to know that judge well but the decisions where heart breaking...I will pray for your family tonight.......Gnarly  

[Poohbear1234]

thanks again gnarly this girl just been putting me threw alot of sleep less nights since she had a bad four wheeler accident broke pretty much everything on left side and hospital screwed up her right arm. She was not found until 5 & 1/2 hrs later. Six months later started hang with wrong people and started drinking alot but did stop and was doing well for about 8 months until about 4 months ago started going out alot again.
I am handing it better this time around even know its worse this time. Think Im just at the end of my rope with her. I just have to put my foot down and not give in and give her the car back, and if it gets bad and she dont want to help herself she has to move out again. I do love her so much and it hurts but at same time this is the end of her living her and hurting the family the way she is. I know my boyfriend feels the same way and he owns the house not me, and her brother whitch is older feels bad but says the same thing. Its ashame her father didnt stay in her life he left when she was 11 saw her few time over frist 8 months then nothing until I call him about her. He told her to run away and stay at a friends house. She did and a week later morning after christmas I got a call from her that she wanted to come home cause she was in a city near us and a girl pulled a gun on her and the girl she was staying with bite her finger thur the skin.

[gnarly_1]

HI....how you doing with all this going on?? if you need to talk ill be up for a wile I have been in your shoes....

[Poohbear1234]

Thanks Sara and Gnarly I know she has to want to help herself. She really seems ashamed now that I found out. I just really thought she would have never tried this drug she knows my boyfriends friends daughter and a boy she went to school with died from using both happend last year. Plus she saw what her friend was doing to the family and she would talk to her mom and felt so bad. I do know the friend is the one who got her to try it but she is in Florida in rehab and we are in PA. and my daughters boyfriend left two weeks ago to oklahama (he would abuse her and started sell heroin two months ago). She did tell me that snorting is not addicting in conversation like 3 weeks ago so thats another reason I was looking for signs. I been finding out more and more as I talk to people that know her and been doing alot of reading on the drug today. I cant sleep mind just keeps thinking about this.

[gnarly_1]

HI and welcome to the forum.....well I never go ageist a mothers intuition you might be right about her using but if she has a habit she would need it twice a day...and your not going to rest comfortable without something.....theres a lot of strong pills out there that could keep the withdrawals off of her so she may be sneeking pills for her fix...I really feel for you I went threw this with my own daughter she took to the streets at 13 as a methamphetamine/crack addict we went threw several yrs off he!! ...no fairy tail ending her rock bottom was a near fatal auto accedet ..but they threw her in juvi and she gotr into recovery there today she's 22 and clean and sober...theres really not a lot you can do ....she has got to want to get help unless that happens nothing is going to change.....we tryed rehabs in/pacent out pacent court ordered detox  and nothing worked until she was ready...you can try having a heart to heart talk with her let it be full of love caring and understanding you might get threw....for you I recommend Alonon
meetings it will teach you how to help and not enable it will also give you support both my wife and I went...I also found prayer to be helpful God can change a heart ..I wish you all the best threw this difficult time good luck and God bless......Gnarly      

[dominosarah]

As bad as this hurts you, yes you are doing the right thing.  Hopefully your daughter will want to get and stay clean.  She has to be the one to make that decision.  Have you thought about going to Alanon?  They are very supportive and can give you some good advice.  Addiction affects the whole family and you all get the brunt end of our addiction. It is quiet tonight so keep checking back.         sara