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LARCETS AND WEED?
Hi all i was wondering if you can help me .
I'm a 37 year old male i do realy well in life i have a good family and love life but i've been doing drugs for 24 years and like weed i realy don't like any other drugs any more .
I started doing larcets aroung a year ago on and off and i find lately if i don't have thim i feel like i'm turning inside out!
I use to smoke weed 5 to 10 time aday but if i smoke now i feel like i do when i'm not doing larcets.
I know i need help but i can't go to rehab i have a family that loves me and i love them i just want to feel better can any one tell me how long i have to not sleep,eat or feel good before it go's away?
Any info would be cool.
Any sites on LARCET addiction would be a great help.
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<FONT COLOR="#6495ED">Well my wife tell's me it's been a week i'm been wiith out lorocets and let me tell ya i feel like i haven't in a long time it's funny how it sneaks up on ya and that was real pain i know i'll never do them again.
TO THOMAS/MILO/JENNYFLA/CINDI/AND EVERYONELSE. i'll hang out and maybe my qwick short week of hell will help someoone.
I know you guys real helped me the most besides my wife that is .But you let us know how to handle it and for that i thank you.
Hope everyone here get to where they want to be someday.
I know i only was a softcore user but the was th worst i ever felt now im on top of the world .
Thank you and peace and love you guys are  the best. </FONT>
<FONT COLOR="#9932CC">PEACE</FONT>
<FONT COLOR="#8B0000"><B>G
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Hello Everone,
  Guess what Im a Hydrocodone addict to.Guess whats even worse? Here i sit ,cover around me(from cold chills),wide awake(from insomnia),weak as hell(from i guess not eating),going thru major withdrawl..*cough* for the second time* cough*..I guess you would call this day one for me and my wife. I have been thru this once almost 2 years ago my wife and I both checked into rehab and left the places after the first night,after we got in rehab we both decided to call my parents and ask them if we could just borrow their guest room.(I cant stand being told when to sleep, eat,talk,and all that other inpatient rehab stuff) and thank god they helped us out..I remember that week of total hell and here I sit starting it all over again..HOW STUPID!..I swore to myself that Id never put myself thru that again, as did my wife.I stayed clean 6 months then had some oral surgery done.I figured its been long enough,one prescription wont hurt me. I got 40 LorTabs and before I knew it bam me and my wife were back on the bottle.Only this time was worse..more pills...more often..Well anyway I was just sitting around dieing for a dose (i have 3 pills in my pocket,for when the withdrawl becomes unbearable) and decided to jump on the web to see if a site existed that may be able to chat with me or help me with any info on makeing these withdrawls a little more bearable.I have also gotten high most of my life on pot..two years ago when I quit the hydro the first time I gave up pot at the same time and never really picked it back up..mabye now and then ill smoke a joint but not everyday anymore..the pills have completly overridden any such desire for pot.My wife is asleep,I am so jealous of her.For some reason she can sleep while she is withdrawling.I cannot.Anyway getting to the point...I need some advice on what will help with these withdrawls..I have seen some suggestions like valium (I have friends looking) and over the counter sleeping pills and anti diareha stuff,I was wondering,I never drink,I hate it if I got drunk could it have the same effect as say the valium?--sleepwise and relaxationwise?The first time I did this I pretty much just laid in a bed and suffered,I prey that there is something that will ease the withdrawls this time.I didnt eat last time either--any tips on what may help keep my stomach in check enuff to keep something down?UGGGG I feel horrible I gotta get away from this computer chair and go lay in bed awhile i my whole damn body is cramping up ..Ill write back in a few hours....Ill be awake Im sure unless I break down and eat my just in case of emergency reserve.


Jamze
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nope that above was my first post I would also like to ask if I get drunk will that help me sleep and kill this horrible mood or just make it worse with the hangover and such? and to get these drugs like clonidine or benzos can i go to a family doc or does it have to be some kinda special doc?Im desperate,if I dont get some sleep im gunna go nuts Ive tried over the counter junk ,dont work,I tried my sisters Ambien, dont work?Any one here ever did the outpatient thing where you detox at home? or what are your thoughts on methadone hospitals? Im terrified of feeling like this and worse for the next week!! any and all advice comments would help 8(

Jamze
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This is so hard, I know it is,,,,detoxed form opiates before  demerol etc..but I was in the rehab...not much good that did,,,,Librium 4 times a day at 25 mg..did nothing for the misery.....Thoms has alot of good info and so does wiz...heating pads, hot baths, jacuzzi's for the muscle aches and pain....walking, aerobic exercise is hard but Thomas swears by it....Someone else here said that MAGNESIUM and Zinc pretty much take away the nasty part of the withdrawals,,,you'll have to check the other posts for the doseage  and L tyrosine 4000 mg on an empty stomach with 200 mg.s of Vitamin B6 will help your brain replenish the endorphines and give you back some energy.....it is an amino acid that essential in our bodies....it comes in 500 mg tabs and the b6 potentiates the action of the tyrosine....then for the runs,  Thomas suggests the brand name immodium at the first hint of  bowel trouble.....and valium or soemthing to take to knock you out the first day or so...he'll pop on soon I hope and so will wiz.....I gotta give you credit  those last three emergency pills would have been gone if in my pocket....good luck,  hang in there  it can be done....people here are proof of that.....sorry I'm seem kinda brief but I have to get somewhere in like 20 min. and have spent my morning online AGAIN.       love to all    cin        PS  how'd I do Thomas  LOL     ?????:)
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I have had a few people send me mail saying that they were unable to get to the forum  i had trouble earlier but, being the computer genius I am  LOL   (NOT) I was able to get on...Thomas was able to read your post re: the emergency vics and drinking and he did express his concern to me about this drinking issue..I hope he does not mind me speaking for him I know he won't care...he did point out the if you do take those 3 vics and drink you may be giving your liver as he phrased it "quite a treat"  this can be harmful....he can elaborate more when he logs on...take care   love to all     TO CHAD FROM PHILLY    AKA hamster man...hey chad did I ever send you the hampster dance?    NA NA NA NA BOO BOO  I GOT ON   LOL     LOVE YOU GUYS
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here's the recope cindi mentioned. Good luck.

Vics are one of the most unpleasant "cold turkey detox experiences" going. Do you have, or can you get access to some benzodiazepines -
    drugs like Valium, Xanax, Librium, Klonopin? Without them, what can I say, it's going to be rough
    whatever you do. Perhaps you've got a friend or a relative with a few in the medicine cabinet - it
    doesn't sound like you've got a family doctor to turn to. Assuming you can get some Valium or one
    of the other benzos, plan for about 4 or 5 days on the stuff, starting the first couple days with
    enough to basically keep yourself "out of it," then gradually decreasing the benzos down to nothing.

    Of course, there's the ever-popular runs! Get the brand-name Imodium and take two at a time at
    each hint of the runs. This symptom will pass after the first few days and is easily taken care of by
    the Imodium.

    Whether or not you can get any benzos, the only thing that really helps the leg cramps are hot baths
    or Jacuzzis - as many as you can stand. I've found that Enteric aspirin can help the aches and
    pains, as well, but not to any dramatic extent.

    Sometimes, if you can just get yourself to sleep to begin with, you can make it through the night.
    When I didn't have an rx for it, I found a double dose of benydryl helped put me out - it's also called
    sleep-eze and is over the counter. But don't expect miracles. It will either work or it won't. Don't
    increase the dose if it doesn't.

    Now for the interesting stuff:

    Go to the health food store and buy a bottle of 100 of the 500mg L-Tyrosine capsules along with a
    bottle of B6 capsules. Your Norco use has caused your brain to become depleted of several
    neurotransmitters responsible for your ability to function and feel good. Until these substances are
    restored, you'll feel like **** no matter what you do. They will come back by themselves, but it will
    take a long time. Taking the L-Tyrosine and B6 provides your brain with the raw materials it needs to
    rapidly create and replenish these vital brain substances. This is how you take it:

    Take 4000mg (four-thousand - eight 500mg caps) plus 200 mgs of B6 on an empty stomach,
    either at bedtime or in the morning. I never have an empty stomach at bedtime, so I have always
    taken this formula in the morning. Get up early if you can, so you can take the dose at least two
    hours before you have to leave for work. (Don't eat any breakfast for at least one hour after taking
    the dose.) I say two hours because that much L-Tyrosine can go through your system and cause
    some mild runs, and you certainly don't want to be in your car when that happens. It's caused the
    runs in me about 20% of the time I've used L-Tyrosine. Also, the L-Tyrosine, among other things,
    stimulates the production of norepinephrin (SP?) a neurotransmitter responsible for mental energy,
    alertness and ambition. So don't drink any coffee with this stuff!

    The good news is that many recovering narcotic addicts feel the difference after the first dose. You
    can suddenly think straight, your mood turns a bit more optimistic, and, in general, you start
    recovering your faculties, your energy, your enthusiasm and ambition for living life.

    At your state, I'd recommend taking the L-Tyrosine and B6 EVERY morning for the first four days,
    then every other morning until you don't feel you need it anymore.

    Beyond that, I'd highly recommend some kind of exercise, even if you feel like hell while you're
    doing it. It helps get rid of all that tension that builds while you're pacing the room wondering how
    you got yourself in this mess. Even just a swift walk will help.

    That's what I know about handling the physical side of this problem. The hardest part to deal with,
    however, is that thing in your head that made you go on the Norco to begin with. I cannot
    recommend strongly enough that you seek out and attend some AA or NA meetings. I always get a
    lot of guff from certain of my friends on the forum for this, but I recommend AA over NA. Why? I
    can only go by my own experience and tell you that I found a lot more sobriety in AA and a lot more
    people working stronger programs than in NA. Besides, almost everyone I know in AA is also a pill
    addict, anyway, so it is not as inappropriate as it sounds. I'm sure there are some fine NA meetings,
    I just didn't find any. Granted, I was incarcerated in a residential program and my choice of NA
    meetings were all in hardcore neighborhoods. Many of these meetings turned into sessions spent
    listening to homeless heroin addicts begging the other attendees for money, a place to stay,
    anything. That is definitely not what we go to these meetings for. I say, just seek out the meetings
    (and a sponsor) that for whatever reason helps give you strength to go one more day without the
    Norco and go with that.

    Just to keep myself honest here, I have been free of Norco or any opiate for about four months, so
    I still have a lot of challenges ahead of me. My biggest problem is that I liked the benzos so much I
    became addicted to them and now, every time I try to get off of them (or run out), I have a seizure.
    Nice, huh? But don't worry, if you use the benzos just to get off the Norco, you won't be running this
    risk.

    Just remember: You've done nothing of which to feel ashamed. You're a normal, decent human
    being who succumbed to a weakness we all, as members of the human race, share
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Thx alot everyone for the info. I broke down early this morning and took one and a half of the vics---tryin my best to get hold of some valium but its scarce in my area right now.Thinking about calling my sister and begging her to go to the health food store for me cause honestly im just to sick to leave this room other that the horrid bathroom trips.Im talkin with glock on icq now and again and hes on day 7 and he helps me alot telling me how good he feels etc etc.Damn though --that seems sooo far away for me.Im definetly much sicker this time than the first time i went thru this,my wife too.Im so mad at the medical community right now.I cant believe how easy it is to get those pills!!Docs give em out like candy.Anyway Im going back to bed I guess, not too sleep of corse ,just to lie there and toss and turn and cramp.I just wanna let you guys know your just answering my posts helps more than you know...kinda makes me feel like Im not doing this alone ya know.BTW Im really worried about getting in this situation again..I swore last time id never take em again, but really i love hydrocodone.anyone here in the methodone program?Also my uncle who just stopped smoking with wellbutrin gave my wife his leftovers and she started takeing them 3 days ago when we began the self detox thing...she says she honestly thinks they r helpin ease her W/Ds.Is this all in her head?Im desperate so I started takeing them too last night.We told my parents we was going camping for a few days so they got our kids.Thomas thx alot for the recipie and thx again everyone else if I can get someone to help me get the stuff from the health food store ill start on it tonight. any idea what all this will cost I got like 100 bucks to my name till when the banks open and I doubt ill be able to drag myself to the bank either.BTW if anyone of you guys live in Louisville Ky and got a few valium laying round my icq # is 2711564. Im desperate so i go to great lenths $ to get them.Bye for now and thx again guys. P.S the reason I broke and took the one and a half was cause depression really set in...watchin Gladiator on TV late last night and at the end I cryed like a kid and that snowballed into alot more crying about lotta other stuff.Any idea how to help these overwelming depression spurts?
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I'm sorry that you are in withdrawals and I wish I could do something to end the suffering, believe me.  Tom is correct about not using alcohol.  It's a depressant and can cause some stomach problems which you don't need right now.  I used to resort to alcohol in the past and got into all kinds of trouble from forging prescriptions, hurting myself intentionally and going to the ER or just stealing pain meds from relatives.

One of the worst parts of WD's is you feel so alone and helpless.  Time passes sooo slowly and everything is just plain ugly! Your body and mind are going through a terrific ordeal right now, but you will get better.  And you are not alone!  Keep posting, we need you,  J.B.
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I watched Gladiator last night, too. Great movie! I know when I went through the WDs (at one point with Vicodin, I could only get a small script twice a week; my tolerance was so high that that only took care of half the week; the other half was spent going into WD; I did that every week for years) I only had the strength to watch movies. They helped psychologically, at least, because they took me away from the misery I was in.

The reason I'm posting now is this: two things you need to do right now: first, get 6 or 8 bucks and get some brand-name Imodium at the grocery or drug store. Right now, you're dehydrating yourself by letting the runs continue. That alone will make you feel terrible. You've got to get the runs stopped and get fluids into yourself NOW. The Imodium really works, too. It's not some worthless OTC drug. Take two or three right away and then every time you feel your bowels waking up, take two more immediately. That first dose will probably stop the runs in 15 minutes. So, get out of bed and drag yourself down to the store. Seriously, ending the runs and restoring your body fluids will make you feel tons better. If you called a doctor right now, that would be his first concern, I promise.

The other thing is this: don't lie in bed and cramp. Get into a hot tub or even hot shower if that's all you've got available.

The Tyrosine will be about 12 bucks, maybe less, and the B6 probably under ten.

But they can wait. Right now, get that Imodium or you're seriously f'd, my friend. Good luck.

Thomas
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How are you doing? It's been kind of quiet on the forum? Where's Spook? What happened to Maximus? I need to ask you something, you always have the answers. I talked with my ex on Thursday, he was off and sick again. I had heard he was back on oxy's along with the methadone. What is this Dr. doing? He's now been on about 30 or so mg's. of methadone for about 3 1/2 months, is he going to have a hard time coming off it? Also, he's always sick, does the drugs lower his immunity? He owes me some money, and I told him I needed some, he said he was getting paid the next day, and would call and give me some. It's now Sunday afternoon, and I haven't heard a word. He's alot of things, but he's never let me down regarding the money issue. Am I being paranoid here? But I have had a feeling of impending doom, about him the last several days. I've always been keenly aware when somethings not right with him, and I feel something really bad has, or is about to. I just can't get what's going on here, he's never even made an effort over the past 3 months since he's been gone, to come and get his stuff. It's almost like he's just staying the weekend with his parents. It's like he just doesn't care! He's pretty mad at me right now, my knowing about the oxy's from the Dr. He thinks I'm being nosey, but honest to God, I didn't ask, the nurse just volunteered  it. He is always mad at me, acts like he hates me. Why doesn't he just pay me back, believe me he has the money, and been done with it, no more contact needed. I told him I would keep his dog, since he can't care for it. He's not on any antidepressents, he doesn't believe in them. Can he be depressed? I just don't understand, how someone so healthy and in great shape just 3 years ago, can become sick eveyday, either a headach, flu, cold. That's how he got started on the oxy's in the first place, was complaining of headachs. I have that feeling he'll never get better, and that he might die. Do some addicts never get over it, and do some never want to get better. I'm just afraid, that the next time I see him, it will be at his funeral. I have really, really bad vibes today. Thank You Thomas......Love Susan
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Hi lea,

refresh my memory about your ex ... He's on the methadone for addiction and getting oxy from another doctor for headaches? Does the doctor prescribing the oxy know about the methadone? All I can say about him now based on what you say is that he's found a new love, namely oxycodone. If he's on a lot of it or getting it from multiple doctors he could be in a half-dreamworld all the time, one that takes him away from his responsibilities, like wife and family, etc. He may resent you now because you remind him of all the responsibilities and pressures this oxy dreamworld relieves him of. He's crawled back into the womb where it's nice a warm and peaceful, nobody demanding anything of him ... and then here you come reminding him of his life. I'm playing amateur psychologist now, but what I say is based on my own experience with prescription narcotics. There was a time I was getting Vics and demerol injections almost every day and I remember resenting anybody who intruded on this warm, dreamy fantasy life I was living most of the time. The flu symptoms could have to do with addiction, but it sounds like he's getting all the drugs he needs - unless he's on something stronger and isn't telling anyone. Secrecy is a hallmark of addiction, among other things. I have to go meet someone right now or I'd write more. I'll be back in about three hours if you want to talk some more.

Peace

Thomas
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Thanks. Two years ago a friend gave him oxy's for recreational use. I have fibromyalgia and other stuff. I think Dr.s created the Fibro name, for when they can't figure out what you have. I have always had narcotics. I don't particulary like them. Now I take the patch. Anyway he would take my meds when he could. Then he started going to my Dr. and got oxy's and perc's. This was over 2 years ago.  As time when by he got more and more addicted, became sick with withdrawals all the time, mean verbally abusive. One year ago he went into the hospital for detox, aweek later came out. Meetings 2 times aweek a great sponser, family support. Bingo! 3 weeks later, he's back using, abusing, lying anything he could get away with. He had already missed 3 months of work last year. He stayed in another room, distant, wouldn't talk, sleep all the time. We hadn't kissed, talked or had sex in over a year at that point. He never told his Dr. about his addiction. In Dec. he left, came back aweek later, getting sick again, slowly. He was nice for about amonth said he wanted to get better, work it out. Missed another month of work in Feb.(really close to being fired) Got Methadone from the Dr. told him he needed help getting off the oxy's. Became mean again. Left mid March, (38 yrs old, 4 kids) moved in with his mom and dad. Won't talk to me, nothing. It's over,I'm sad but Ok. My kids'can't stand him, because of his verbal abuse. The other day, I find out he's using both oxy's and methadone. Will not do a program, meetings, sponser, nothing. He says he can do it on his own. I spent almost 6 years with him(not married, my kids are not his) I was almost finacially ruined because of him, he will not help with money. I paid his way, his child support for 4 months. I gave him a car so he could go to work. This man has some money. But he has never had anything or anyone in his life before me. His exwife hates him, all his ex's dislike him, his children don't want anything to do with him. Everyone says he's a loser. Now it looks as if he will never have anything. I think I need to let go....Thanks for your help....Love Susan
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There is no way for me to top anything these wonderful people have told you.  I just noticed something in your post that I can totally relate too.  You said that your wife can sleep through withdrawals w/ no problem.  I had to smile, because my husband is the same way(different circumstances), and he can sleep through a world war, or hurricane.......LOL  I can recall agonizing over a family crisis or something........and he sleeps through it like a baby.  LOL One thing I can relate to is how you must feel.  Very alone........sitting there going through this terrible ordeal...while your wife is snoozing away. LOL  Well, you come to the right place....there will always be someone here to help you, or answer your post. JB, Tom, Wizard, Cindi.....all great sources of support.  My situation is a little different, but they've been my lifeline....and many others too.  Hang in there......these people are priceless....
God Bless you,
Angelica
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I agree with what you said, wholeheartedly about this drug!!  It's the worst.  I'm not sure I understand what you said about the euphoria afterwards.  Could you explain?  The sleepness nights, being worn out, all the withdrawal symtoms, etc., I understand.

Fill me in.

whitedove
Pam
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So we decided to take a bit of the hair of the dog that bit us? All I can say is that I hope it works out for you!

Wizard has the right idea about addiction. When all else falls by the wayside, try getting in touch with your spiritual side. Keep seeking and be ever strong! J.B.
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don't blame you, dude. I've withdrawn from Vics literally a couple hundred times (I'm slow to catch on, what can I say?). IF YOU STICK TO IT, your doc's technique sounds great. Thank your lucky stars you have an understanding doc that apparently trusts you. Whatever you do, don't abuse that trust. Best of luck to you. Be strong!

Thomas
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glad to hear you're alive, my friend. Just saying hi ... give my best to Marty.

Thomas
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it's a sad but intelligent conclusion you have come to. So he has multiple ex wives, too. Sounds like he's used to going through women. I bet he was pissed when you went on the fentenyl patch, giving him no way of stealing your medication. And now he's persuaded your doctor to give him BOTH methadone and oxycodone? Speaking as a recovering rx narcotics addict, I think he must be having a high high from all that stuff. After reading endless posts about oxy on this forum, about 9 months ago I just had to see what the whole thing was about and got some oxycontin from my doctor. I wasn't 3 pills into the script when I started schewing them up for effect. Half way through the bottle, I had them pulverized and I was doing oxy lines like they were coke. I know it relieves a lot of pain, and I think any pain patient that wants it should get it, but if you're just after a high, oxy's sublime. I'm afraid your ex-boyfriend is totally into himself and his high right now. Thank god you didn't marry him! I'm afraid he isn't anywhere near hitting bottom. But rest assured he will.

If the pattern holds, he'll lose his job, milk disability as far as he can, and when your doctor cuts him off and he has no medical insurance to pay for more doctors, he'll resort to illegal means to obtain the stuff and eventually get popped. I hope he turns it around without having to go through the whole scenario, but it's a familiar story you're telling. He's not going to be a suitable mate for anyone for a long time, if ever.

I hope you find someone who appreciates what he's getting. Everyone willing to give love certainly should receive it. E-mail me anytime you want to talk at:

***@****

Thomas
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<FONT COLOR="#FFF0F5">Well had to stop by and let ya all know i'm better.
I been feeling good for 3 days now.
I can sleep and the sky is blue again.hehe!
We all need to help JAMZE out poor guy is hurting!8-(
I feel so sorry for this guy!!!!
I'll tell ya narcotic are realy bad i can't beleave it grabed ahold of me like it did .
Like i said before i've done mostly every thing when it comes to drugs and never had anything make me feel like i was when i came off lorocets the **** is evil!
I thank each and everyone that had some kind of input on the withdrawing thing with me you will never beleave how much help you folks realy where.
And as far as depression well i'm so happy to be better been 3 days of happyness i don't think i'll have depression and if i do so be it. NO MORE PAINKILLERS FOR ME!
Well i got to go i'll stop by here and there and see how you guys are doing.{i'll read the post everyday i'm sure}
</FONT>

<b><FONT COLOR="#8B0000">PEACE!</FONT></b>
                                 <b><FONT COLOR="#483D8B">G
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<FONT COLOR="#8B0000">Soory about last post chose a bad color for the font if ya look real hard ya might beable to read it. or highlite it.hehe so hear go's again.</FONT>
<b><FONT COLOR="#006400">Well had to stop by and let ya all know i'm better.
I been feeling good for 3 days now.
I can sleep and the sky is blue again.hehe!
We all need to help JAMZE out poor guy is hurting!8-(
I feel so sorry for this guy!!!!
I'll tell ya narcotic are realy bad i can't beleave it grabed ahold of me like it did .
Like i said before i've done mostly every thing when it comes to drugs and never had anything make me feel like i was when i came off lorocets the **** is evil!
I thank each and everyone that had some kind of input on the withdrawing thing with me you will never beleave how much help you folks realy where.
And as far as depression well i'm so happy to be better been 3 days of happyness i don't think i'll have depression and if i do so be it. NO MORE PAINKILLERS FOR ME!
Well i got to go i'll stop by here and there and see how you guys are doing.{i'll read the post everyday i'm sure}</FONT></b>
<FONT COLOR="#9400D3">PEACE!</FONT>
                     G
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I hate to be realistic here but I wish I had a dollar for every time I said "no more painkillers!".  I haven't been visiting here as often as I used to and don't fully know your story, admitedly. I just wanted to point out to you that fear and willpower alone will not keep you away from this "demon". Please don't downplay the depression aspect either. When all else has failed, the Demon will use that most effectively to get you back on his side of the court.

This is some friendly advice from someone who has been there and done that for many years. I can only pray that you will be one of the "lucky ones" who can get off and stay off of narcotics forever! As for me...it's a daily battle. When times get rough(and they will), I come here and read some posts in order to get refocused on what I'm all about and where I've come from.  Best of luck to you!  J.B.
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I do so know what you mean.  Lortabs, lorcets, hydrocodone, they're all the same and they're the worst!! The psychiatrist in the hospital said, it was the hardest drug to get off of.  He called it the "Hollywood Drug" and that those in Hollywood could afford to have what's called, "rapid detox"; of course, I cannnot afford that procedure so I'm left with the taper process and it's hell.  Some days are OK, but most days, I have a headache, at least and it has flared up my fibromyalgia conditions again.  I will never, never, pick this drug up again.  They said methadone is easier to get off of than this stuff.  I couldn't believe it!  That's actually what they were trying to do was switch me to a different opiate based drug and bring me down faster.  BUT, insurance didn't approve it nor the hospital stay I had that they said they would cover so now, I'm stuck with a huge bill.  BUT, I am going to fight it.  I followed all procedures.

Anyway, I just wanted to say congratulations and isn't the blue sky great?!

white dove
Pam
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Hello Glock I'am truly glad to hear your doing so well with your withdrawal. I have to agree One hundredred persent with J.B.'s accurate observation! If your stated problems are all that accure,Please concider yourself in a very, very small minority and thank God in the process! This incidious drug rarelly leaves anyone so easily. I have been TWO months clean and like J.B. have to fight every day to stay clean. Depression, anger, cynicism, all are part of my day's,Sleeplesness at night; It truly suck's.Please be aware that there is a post accute withdrawal symptom wear the addict feel a complete euphoria that last's frome several hours to a day or two, the it's down from there. Please don't take this the wrong way! I sincerlly hope you are out of the woods. If so., Remember to remember and never pick it up again, you may not be so fortunate next time. Bless you and all strugling with this desiese. Shane
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Hello Pam. Yes when I was in rehab they discussed a variety of post accute withdrawal symptoms. This Euphoric state is one of them, and one I've experianced twice after about one week clean of hydrocodone. It is just that, an extreme feeling of euphoria almost like when you were high on pills. IT vary's for individuals of course but mine lasted for about one day. Then the Reality set in. THe long and hard road staying off these F***ing pills. Getting clean is the easey part. Staying clean is tough. Hope this helps you Pam. I'd be interested to know if anyone else heard of this! Thanks   Shane
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I read your question(a good one)about the post euphoria syndrome that many of us have experienced. It's simply a "pink cloud" frame of mind that we experience after all of the physical withdrawals have subsided. We get to feeling better and may take a bath and clean up our acts enough to feel that "all is over". I've felt a renewed sense of porpose and energy and will actually take measures to make myself presentable again to the other 95% of society. In short, the body awakens after a deep sleep and wants to live again! I have survived this terrific ordeal...on with a wonderful life! I'm whole again!

Nope...that feeling lasts but a short time and soon we are back at our previous ways again...our minds have been "imprinted" and will likely never be whole again. We relapse!

That's the reality of what we are by the time we find this forum. Sadly, our battle will never end. We are but human!  J.B.
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Hello again guys
well I folded I decided to go to my family doc and c if he could gimme somthing to ease these Wds a bit....doc wants to wean me off em slow...I gotta admit he didnt have to twist my arm guys I was really in alota pain...so the docs starting me at 100 lorcets a week and gunna reduce me 10% each week..I hate these damn pills so much right now just lookin at the damn bottle is makeing me nausious....doc swears hes done this for people alot and says its best and easist way to get rid of em...I had to do somthing I gotta get back to work runnin outa sick days...why do I feel like such a failure?...Glock bro dude you should thank god every time you smile man that he gave u the strenth to suffer thru that like u did till u came all the way out the other side..Please dont make the same mistake I did dude...this is my 2nd time detoxin off this ****...and I to swore i was done..all it takes is one little script from a dentist and bam you could be back in the damn rat race...well at least i got a doc helpin me now and mabye with the help of the doctor the posts from u guys and the mercy of god I WILL BEAT THESE DAMN PILLS!!

                                       jamze
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I also know about the euphoria after the first few days of being clean. It is nice and DOES give you a false sense of it's finally over! Well,it does go away and we are what we are as JB said by the time we reach the forum our minds are imprinted. BUT, I don't believe we are totally destined to fail! Getting off was the easy part, staying off is the NEVER ending battle. I for one will NOT stop fighting the "Dragon". To me the withdrawels and the forum are a reminder of how dark it was. I now see LIGHT most of the time. The euphoria still comes back to an extent if I will it. It's not the same as the first high, never will be. But it is always better then the LAST WITHDRAWAL. For me, at least for now that in itself is good enough. We are forever changed by the "Dragon" it never goes away completely. But we CAN make ourselves it's master and not let it be the other way around. I choose to keep it at bay and with God's good graces and my prayers I hope to do just that. For I will NOT despair again. If I do the "Dragon" wins. I'm a sore loser when it comes to MY life. People there can be other euphorias if we let them into our hearts. Find the light, see the light and reach for it. Most of us including myself have relapsed before. Some of us many, many times, but I will never, ever give up trying to stay clean. The alternatives SUCK to much! i want to thank God and all the angels here on the forum who help me in my low points. You are always here to pick me up when I stumble. I do apologize for such a long post but My time will be limited on the on forum so I need to get as much in as I can when I have the chance. Thomas, I hope all is well for you as I know you have had a hill to climb. As always ALL of you are in my prayers. One final note: It isn't always the Land of Oz with the rainbows, but I try to stay there as often as I can in my heart :-) God Bless you all,
Power & Magick 2 U,
Wizard
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Yep, I'm still alive and some days even kicking! I've been feeling pretty good lately except for a little depression. I'm working on it anyway. Marty is fine and pretty intense these days...we are having a major family reunion here at the farm during July 4th. Lots of work to do to get ready! Give Bobbie my love!  J.B.
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Hello again Everyone.
Been doing ALOT of thinking lately and talking with a few friends, and Ive come to realize that just because I didnt quit the hydrocodone cold turkey,all on my own,in full blown W/D doesnt mean Im a failure.I think that for me anyway I just cant do it like that.I honestlt think that the tapering idea that the Doc has me doing may be the beginning of a good stratagy to win this war.The first time I quit yes I did do it cold turkey in bed full blown W/D and I figured well Ill do the exact same thing this time and I wont be addicted anymore.Certain things that have been said on these post have made me realize that even though I wasent takeing the pills for those 6 months I was still addicted or I wouldent be back in this mess all over again.Last week when I tryed the cold turkey thing again it was like I panicked and said O.K ENOUGH!!!! Im stopping NOW!!!! and I guess I was blinded by the sheer pain and destruction that the pills are haveing on my life and figured that as soon as I got detoxed and wasent currently takeing pills anymore that everything would be perfect.Seeing the struggles that you guys are haveing just staying clean even after detox has made me realize that I cant just end it that fast..some people may be able to just detox and BAM never think about them again,not me, I get sick to my stomach saying this but I really do love the way those pills make me feel(I am actually haveing dreams about finding full bottles of hydrocodone,and about owning my own vault full of so many pills I could swim in them) and I think that even after Im detoxed Im still gonna love it, miss it, want it,and crave it. I dont have a problem so far with the tapering thing (but then again its only the 2nd day) but Ive never been one to eat my supply up real fast if I had 20 pills sure Id get alot higher eating 10 at once but I am always too scared to not have any for the next morning,so Id take 3 then get to the first stage of WD and take 3 more etc etc.And it seems as long as I have SOME pills I can make myself WD a little but soon as I run out I panick and freak out scared I wont be able to find more before i get sick. Since I did that cold turkey thing and went thru those 3 days of hell I lowered my tolerance some in the process and dont need 20 pills a day now to keep from getting sick I can get by on around 9 and my wife can get by on 3 or 4 so mabye the 100 a week supply that the Doc has got me starting out with can help wean both me and my wife.I got a question for you guys ?Can I in my position join AA meeting even though Im still using the pills?or do I gotta wait till Im clean?I dont think Im gonna be able to just get clean and then go back to my normal life I had before I ever started takeing the pills,I know I gotta get into some kinda program or meetings or something, its just so humiliating and embarrassing.they outa have ONLINE NA meetings hehe will post later if u guys dont mid hearing my thoughts


jamze
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I won't make a blanket statement about AA or NA as a whole but around here at least, the only requirement to belong is the "desire to quit using". I've seen folks show up for meetings higher than a kite(myself included)and not be run off unless they were doing something threatening to the others. As we say, "but for the grace of God, there go I". I'd say that the worst thing that you could do at this point is not at least try a few meetings and meet some of these recovering addicts.

I remember my first meeting while I was still in the rehab center! I was so scared,nervous,sweaty and nauseated that I wanted to crawl under the table. It was devastating to introduce myself and admit that I was an alcohlic and drug addict. I burst into some God awful sobs and just collapsed. That's when my group put their arms around me and welcomed me home. The sheer power of that group's love changed my life forever!  J.B.
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Keep up the wonderful work, and thank you for those encourging words in your post (june 4)!
You're are right, it sucks here, and you DON'T want to come back to this side!
I thought I could just about see the light last week, and i was reaching for it, but slipped, i don't see it anymore.  I'm going to try this taper off method, but it's so so very hard, especially while living with a very unhappy addict!  I'm anxious to see what the strength of my family will do for me next week.  I'm gonna try!!!  Then i can come back and try to help my husband help himself before he dies from this thing!!!!
Prayers for you, i know you can stay strong!
Lv Jenny
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I've had those dreams, too about my drug of choice. They are getting less and less frequent though. What is the subliminal mind trying to tell us?....Maybe we still have to be on guard?
The funny thing is that I've never had a dream about alcohol, yet have had many dreams about car accidents. Go figure! J.B.

P.S. Is it ever going to stop raining here in the midwest and get warm and sunny again?

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....after a 2 month dry spell, we've been getting rain for 3 days now.  I will need a boat just to leave my driveway.  I guess we asked for it, and we got it.  LOL  I have to admit, I like these rainy days.  It seems to be very calming, and peaceful. LOL  Hope your well, these days.
LOVE,
Angelica
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I wish you good luck with your tapering. And please don't ever think of yourself as a "failure" -- I've spent too much time doing that myself (and still do). Anyway, I wanted to say I can relate to those dreams you're having. With me it's Valium. I'm always scared I'm going to run short before my next Rx (panic attacks)...and I'll dream I find pills in drawers, bags, cabinets, wherever...but in these dreams I just take one or two, just enough to get by, not to go overboard (I guess even in my dreams I'm nervous!) Well, hang in there, and keep posting. I have never withdrawn from opiates, but as you've read, lots of folks here have, and so you know it can be done.
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I have to admit I love these rainy days too, Anjelica. There's nothing so soothing as lying in bed, listening to the rain on the roof. Even storms are OK -- I'm not afraid of bad weather like I once was.
jennyfla, I can't pretend to analyze dreams, but to me your dream strongly shows your strength, determination, and willingness to commit to recovery.It's like the detox/rehab is a safe haven for you. I think that's a great sign. And by all means, keep that Bible handy!
J.B. -- yeah, I can't even "let myself go," even in my dreams. But as for weather, I'm happy any day there's no snow...:)
Reading posts by all of you on various threads has been tremendously helpful to me.
Milo
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I put the bible under my pillow the other night, and kissed it and prayed to god for help.
That night, i had a weird dream.  I dreamed i was driving hit a car on my way back to my best friend's house.  Someone i grew up with, but we live 250 miles from eachother now, but talk a lot.
Anyway, i went to my friend's house, and the cops were chasing me.  My friend ended up talking me to a  rehab, and i was concerned about my husband because i had 'everything' with me.  I also didn't want my parents to find out (geez i'm 38-years old, listen to me!)  But anyway, it was a good rehab program, and i woke up before i started, but felt a sense of peace while there.  I'm wondering if god was trying to tell me to go to detox?
BTW, my friend has a husband who is an addict and alcoholic, so she is all too familiar with addictions.  And, her first husband was an alcoholic, and ended up killing himself a long time ago.  She doesn't know i'm using again, and i don't want to tell her.
Just thought i'd share my dream.
Lv Jenny
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Hey guys.... I had too much to do to really get on a read all the posts but hubby is snoring and so are the kids....Now  Listen to old wordly cindi    (see post from angelica below  LOL) NOBODY HERE IS A FAILURE>>>My God...being clean is sucha struggle...getting clean is just as hard but the real work begins after detox..I see nothing but determination in the both of you...and that is where it starts..the willingness...to get clean...so you have some failed attempts....big flippin deal..I read in my NA book that there are some people that truly are not able to stay clean....Jesus, there are people that have been trying to stay clean for 30 years...and maybe one day they will,  or maybe they won't but they try...their intentions are good...just because a diabetic takes his insulin and watches everything they eat,,,does not mean their blood sugar won't go up or down,..but they try to maintain it...nothing is in stone..they refer to the word practice in my books and in life in general....someday,, it will happen...we, you all of us will be ok,,just for today.....hang in there....Jenny do you have acces to a computer in florida..I know wiz went fishing  took his laptop and was going to try and look for a phone hookup   LOL   now,, that's an addict   LOL   Hi Wiz.....love ya..  Lov to all      cin
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Hey Cindi girl!
Well i screwed up a bit, i ended taking a little something.  I was trying to pack and get my stuff done, but my legs felt like that weighed 100 lbs a piece.  It was unbearable and i didn't have the creepy-crawlies, as i call them, but i broke down anyway.  I think i can do this while i gone, in fact, i know i can.  I'll let you know how i did once i return.  I may get on while at my parents', but i don't want anyone to see what i'm up too, so it depends on the privacy-level.
I hope you are doing well.  Free free to email me, i'll check that during the week.
Thanks hon!
Stay strong and healthy girl!
Lv Jenny
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Thank you Cindi.
Yup, i live in florida, but will be going to New Jersey for the week.  My parents have a computer, and i'm sure i will make my way into checking up on all of you!  lol!
I'm gonna give it a try this coming week, wish me luck!
Lv Jenny
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we have go to talk asap        have a good trip and as angelica says  chin up   Love you  cin   ps  travel safely hon....
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Thanks Hon!
I'm sitting here trying to figure myself out (not an easy chore).  I'm trying to find out when it was that i 'crossed-over' to the other side.  I use to be able to just play around with these suckers, but they took hold of me while my back was turned.  My husband kept warning me to watch out!
The weird thing about it is the more i think about it and the more i stress and have anxiety about it, the worse it is.
I've kind of got my mind all twisted up and i no longer have a grip on this thing anymore, and that scares the living **** out of me!!!!  I've always prided myself on thinking that, yeah, i have a grip on this thing, and now it's got a grip on me!  I hope this all makes sense.  I used to always keep my quantities way down so i could be in control.  I never ever used while at work 9-5, and never ever while up north visiting family.  All of the sudden, it became necessary to take a little something around 3ish or else i didn't think i could make it.  This happened after i dislocated my finger back in dec.  Then it moved up to 1, now it can hit as easy as 8 - 11 am.  So far, this morning, i've taken 2000 mg of l-tyrosine, and i don't have any w/d yet.  Don't know if my body is running alittle late today, or if it is the amino acid, but i do have to say that they make me feel weird.  I don't like it at all, but if they are the reason that the w/d are staying away, then ok, i'm game for a short while.  i wish i had thought about doing this earlier in the week (i could kick myself), that way i wouldn't be so stressed out going up north tomorrow morning in this condition.  I still have so much to do today, and i hate to have to do everything in this spacey, out of this world kind of head trip.
Thanks for listening sweetie.  Talk to you soon.
Lv Jenny
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DUUHHHHHHHHH  God, I hat it when i sound so dumb..LOL  I meant to ask you if you had a computer in Jersey..i think you may have known what i meant..  LOL..love ya   cin
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Wow, I really can't believe how many of you are tapering like me.  It's not easy, is it?   It also sounds like we're trying it about the same way.  I heard one of you say 10% and mine is .5 every 3 days.  I get very discouraged, but I have gone from 14 tablets to 6 now.  However, as I mentioned in a previous message, it feels like cold turkey now.  I wonder why.  I've tapered, have the klonipin, xanax, etc.  AND, I've added all the vitamin supplements possible, along with water and trying to eat right.

Working is hard and practically impossible.  Going in for medical detox was not an option for those of you who read my previous post.  I have been accepted for outpt. therapy, but I had it 3 years ago, still go to AA and NA meetings now, etc. so I don't know ........

Mood swings suck!!  I have my husband that has been giving me my meds.  It didn't work with just HIM giving them to me, so my psychiatrist keeps the bottle, puts 2 days worth in an envelope and my husband picks them up every other day.  This way, the pressure is less on my husband and if he gives in to my "begging" for more, I run out and have to wait until the Dr. gives us more.  Tapering is just plain hard, no matter how you go about it.

AND, yes go to meetings, don't stop!!  It is "the desire to stop using, drinking, etc."  That's absolutely all it is.  AND, everyone here certainly has that desire.  A sponsor is helpful too because your family can't be objective.  I've learned that through many trials, errors and arguments.

I'm at the Lake of the Ozarks, trying to relax, but it hasn't made a difference really.  The symptoms still exist.  I just wish I could regulate the sleeping.  Sleep is so important and I just can't get it right, especially now that I'm down this low in the quantity I'm taking.

Anyone have anymore suggestions or thoughts?  AND, why is it so hard now when I've been tapering?  That's my biggest question.

whitedove
Pam
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Wow, you are still feeling that bad?  from what I understand of that post re: the magnesium and zinc...I understood that ionly works if you start taking them a week before you start detox...build yourself up and then start the detox....at least that's what I got out of reading it....I know that tapering is hard but I also know that we can't get off this stuff with no discomfort...there will always be some degree of the pain in the ass withdrawals....now that you are down to 6 a day,,you have to allow your body to adjust to that doseage...that may take a few days...then it will adjust and you'll feel better...then when you are down to 3, probably the same thing.  what we have done to ourselves as far as all the opiates..is unreal...now we have to adjust to not taking the usual dose...does this make sense? like having a baby,,,we carry it around for 9 months..in the beginning our bodies have to adjust to the little thing that it is not used to having,,then we deliver and we have to adjust again..so our hormones go whacky again.. what we have done in the process of using we can't undo overnight..it taks time, patience and discomfort   good luck and if you need me  you know how to get me?    love to all       cin
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Cindi:

You are always there and so helpful everytime I pull up this forum.  THANK YOU!!

I have to work today for the first time in 2 weeks and I feel like, you know what!!!  I pray to make it through the day.

A lot more has happened, but I don't have time to fill you in right now since I must shower and attempt to work.

Bottom line - I'm at 5 pills today along with 4 xanax and 4 klonopin but, I'm still having an extremely difficult time.  I talked with a lady on a help line that said, she thought I was having more trouble with the xanax, given that my husband has control of it too and I had "upped" it when I started tapering on the Lortab.  What do you think about that?  Does it stand further research, in your opinion?  I know you have nursing background and I'd like to draw on it.  I liked your previous analogy about equating this to "having a baby" and the changes at various times.

Can't wait to hear back from you.

Fondly,

whitedove
Pam
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There's one thing I'd like to suggest. Since Klonopin & Xanax are in the same class of drugs & do pretty much the same thing (though I understand Xanax works faster), you might consider taking one or the other, not both. Adding one benzo to another doesn't increase effectiveness (at least it didn't for me). If your supply is limited, this would also be a good way to save some meds in case of need later. Just a thought -- with all best wishes -- Milo
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.....Thanks for adding some color to our world.  Pretty creative , hummmm???
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Good idea!!  Sometimes, in our fogs, we don't think of these simple things.  THANKS!!

I saw that xanax was listed at the top of the forum page, but I'm getting ready for work (trying) so, I don't have time to read it now.

It is an interesting thought that I'm having more trouble now from the xanax than the Lortab. Don't you think?

whitedove
Pam
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I'm the same way! I don't have a problem with hydro, but benzos -- well, that's another matter. You may want to ask your doctor to switch you from Xanax to Valium, as I understand Xaxax is the most difficult benzo to discontinue.
All best -- Milo
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In 2002 i ended up with a condition called ptc which is fluid that builds up on my brain.. The doctors would always try giving me narcotics  and i would always say no to them but about 5 years ago i gave in Them people were driving me crazy. They told me to lose weight (20) pounds and i would not need the shunts anymore well when i started i weighed 280lb and now i weigh 160 and my problems are just getting worse.I just had my 32 surgery to fix the shunt in my brain and it never seem to be going anywhere. The only thing i have done is got myself where i feel as if i have to have pain meds,,,but i really do still have pain from the ptc everyday so what do i do?
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