Love him or leave him

Question

Hi. I'm a 33 yr old divorced mother of three. I work fulltime in the healthcare industry. I have been addicted to Tramadol for 5 yrs. For the past two yrs I habe been dating a man the I grew up with and that I love very dearly. He suffered a back injury playing sports in high school and has been living with the pain for years. So I started to share my script with him. We are now to the point where we take my whole script of 180 pills in less than a week and we are buying pills off the street to last us til I get my next script. We always run out of money and spend 2 or 3 days detoxing each mth. I am ready for this cycle to end. I have arranged for myself to be off work from Jan 1st - Jan 10th. I plan to make a change for myself and my kids. My concern is that he's not ready to do the same. He doesn't think I will follow through. We live together and I know it will be impossible for me to stay clean if he is still taking pills around me. I love him very much but I want to stop this for good and get my life back. Any advise would be helpful.

10356 · Accepted Answer

Hi Horizonlight.. although I have never taken tram I have read a lot about them. They are a synthetic opiate with a antidepressant like effect. If taken in high volume our you are prone to seizures it is recommended that you taper off them to lessen the chances of seizures. they have the same physical discomfort as all opiates when going thru wd but with the antidepressant it drags it out a lil longer and seems to cause more depression.. many reach out to their Dr, for a antidepressant before stopping our when they do.. I have also read of others that have gone ct off it with no problems but the usual ones when coming off any addicting substance.. On the right of your screen you will see a thread Tramadol & Ultram... it is made up off peps helping each other get off this drug. You will find a lot of knowledge there.Congrats on your 25 hours ! Check the Thomas recipe and the amino acid protocol You may have some of the things they mention at home to help your wd.. They say do not make any major decisions until you have a decent amount of clean time under your belt.. as for your bf getting clean with you it may work if you both want it to.. Can you ask for help with the kids from family our friends ? You are not alone in this so keep posting keep the reasons you are quitting in front of you at all times. I wish you and yours the very best. lesa

LeaAnn807 · Answer

Hi, I'm sorry to just now see this!  I've been super, nuts busy with the holidays and some other junk.

I think the best thing would be to talk to your doc about wanting off the pills.  You don't have to go into great detail.  Just that you need help stopping, because when you try, it gives you uncomfortable symptoms.  The doc may not agree with you.  A lot of them still think that tramadol doesn't cause withdrawal.  They are WRONG!  

As far as two adults detoxing with kids in the house.  Looks like you do that every month anyway, right?  How old are your kids?  Old enough to do some things for themselves?  Or really young?  You may need help with them if they are.  Just a suggestion!  The thing with tram withdrawal is that it takes a little longer to feel better than with standard opiates.  Your energy will be low and you'll have some insomnia for a while.  There are things you can get OTC that will help though.  Give it some thought.  I can give you a list of things that will help you! : )

I hope you see this.  I'm really sorry it took me this long to respond!  I have three kids myself, and it's been crazy around here lately!

Horizonlight · Answer

Oh and as for him..he says that he is going to go cold turkey with me. He will continue to work daily though. I'm a little worried though because we will have 2 adults detoxing in a home with 3 children. Could be a bad situation. I'm not sure how serious he is though. He has mentioned that he thinks it's going to be a wasted week off work. I feel like he's only agreeing with me right now because we have no pills and no money left to get any.

Horizonlight · Answer

Really? See I've talked to several people who used to be or currently are addicted to stronger opiates such as Vicodan, percocet and lortab. And they told me that Tramadol should be easy because it's not as strong as the others. They almost laughed at me....not people on this site. Just friends or aquaintances. Him and I have talked about this alot. For the past month I have been researching and trying to come up with a plan for my week off. I've considered the Thomas Recipe. So you don't think I should go cold turkey. (Background - 500 - 600mg per day for approx 5yrs)

Horizonlight · Answer

When I read the part in your comment about If he threatens my recovery I know what I have to do, tears came to my eyes. That should tell me something right there. I don't want to lose him. He is a great provider, works very hard and treats me like a princess. Maybe I'm just emotional today because I am currently 25 hrs with no pills.

dominosarah · Answer

Hi and welcome~~

Tramadol needs to be weaned down slowly.  Going ct can be very dangerous.  We have a couple ladies on here who have successfully come off tramadol and have a wealth of info.  I will look them up!

As for your living arrangements, is he willing to get off the meds too?  If not this will be very toxic for you.

lulu747 · Answer

First of all-congratulations for taking the first step and admitting you have a problem.  Second of all-your life and your sobriety must come first as I am sure you are well aware this is a downward spiral.  Plus you have your children to worry about.  Addiction is a tricky monster and I am in no way qualified to give advice.  I do know that two people that use together must get clean together because how else can that relationship work?  Ultimately-you have to do what is right for you and your children-maybe he will be inspired  by your good example.  But if he threatens your recovery...Well I think you know the answer to that.  Also-the physical detox is hard- but as you've expressed concern at staying clean aftercare like NA or counselling is probably the best idea.  Best wishes and keep posting.  There are a lot of more knowledgeable people than me on this site.  Someone will come along soon.  Sending support.....