Meetings?

[scoenen]

I have heard a number of the old timers recommending getting into aftercare.  Now, there has to be some true in it because they are clean and my way is not working so I have a question.

Many have mentioned NA or AA.  The problem for me is that in my community I can't go.  If certain people found out my problem it could affect my husbands standing and ability to do his job well. I wish more people were understanding about addiction but there are alot of close minded people that would jump at this opporunity and gossip.  Is this at all a problem?  Would I have to be concerned about this?  Is there any other option for me?

What do you guys suggest?  Im I just overacting and it would not be a issue?

[hellc@mst]

Hi BF. Just read your inference that the former president( i can only conclude you were suggesting George W Bush) was a stepper. Nice attempt to claim George Bush s sobriety for the 12x12 fraternity allbeit, spurious and unfounded.

[tired_of_oxy]

Glad to hear your going to go. I went last night, withdrawls and all lol and I can't tell you how much it helped me!! It even helped distract me from wds but I also met a lady with a year clean from oxy and talking to her gave me so much hope and encouragement. I got her phone number and a lot of other people's too and plan to call if I'm feeling weak..(which honestly, I am today) I had never been to this particular meeting and was so glad I went. I think you'll find it helps you enormously to see other people who have been where we are who have turned their lives around. It really helps! Post later and let us know how it went. ;) I think this will make all the difference for us to stay clean. I know both times I tried to go it alone I just couldn't so it. It's too hard but with help it makes it doable.

[BrotherFrankie]

u will be glad u did..

we are here if needed

[WantToBeNormalAgain]

Good for you!! Great choice, I know you won't regret it. yes, learn from others and be open to all they have to say. It will help you so much. I don't know anyone that could do this on their own without relapsing. I know you're making the right choice. Even if the meetings were a matter of public knowledge, you should be proud and hold your head up high. You're getting help to better your life, how many people can say that? And not just addicts, I'm talking anyone that has any problem - how many take the time and effort to better themselves? Not many. Also, anyone who wants to judge or gossip - well I say those people can just sit and marinate in their own misery. You don't want to associate with anyone who would turn their nose up at someone who is bettering themselves. Leave them to gossip about each other..So well done on your decision to go to a meeting. I know it's nerve wracking, but once you get there and go through the doors, you'll know you made the right decision. Let us know how it goes!

[scoenen]

thank you for quelling my fears.  I need to start to be honest with myself and in the rest of my life.  Its time to start worrying about how I will be perceived and start to be the person God wants me to be.  I have decided to go to our local meeting.  it will be easier to get to and will not allow me to use time and distance as a excuse.  Thank you for all the post I think I am finally ready to hear and learn from what all of you have to offer.  no more doing this alone.  

[BrotherFrankie]

i am a pastor. i am a Reverend. i know what you say when you say if people knew. i am a sponsor to a pastor of a mega church..

its anonymous. besides, people are people. we are human.. didnt the former president go to AA?

i make meetings. i no longer care who knows.

hope this helps .

[ImDONENoMore]

Is it possible to call your Dr.'s and have them cancel your prescriptions?  I'm afraid the temptation will be too great especially so early on, at least it would have been for me.  Do you feel comfortable calling your Dr.?  You don't have to say you have a problem, just tell them you've decided to take a different approach to your pain management and want to give the alternatives (therapy, OTC meds, whatever) a shot.  Just something to consider. :)

[dede2121]

i HIGHLY recommend the meetings. i was afraid i would see someone i know but i never have and now that i have been going awhile i really dont care if i see someone i know or not. they cant judge me if they are there for the same thing.
and besides if you listen to the readings when you first go in it basically says what you hear and see in here, stays here.
give it a try. i guarantee you will come out feeling a heck of a lot better than you felt when you came in.

[throwindatowl]

Just got back from the gym and was thinkin about you. I was nice to see you have a place to go get help. It was even better to see YOU made a very important step to help yourself. Admitting you cant do it yourself is a huge first step. Im a little worried about the call from your doctor. You made it this far and you owe it to yourself to make it to that meeting before you make it to your doctors office. I know that miserable feeling all to well and I know if you just can make it afew more days you wont go get your scripts. You are strong and youve takin the first steps to getting a much better life back. Im proud of you and I know you have plans for saturday but if your feeling really weak try to hit that meeting asap. I wish you the best and I have faith in you. Make sure you have faith in yourself.

[scoenen]

well I checked out na and plan to go thuis saturday in a town not to far from me.  I really don't think I can do this alone.  i am freaking a little bit right now.  I got a call from my doctors office today that my scripts are ready to pick up and oh by the way he upped the dose because I was complaining about the pain.  holy moly what a mind screw.  I am miserable and my mind is saying how if I picked them up all this would go away.   Gotta stay strong.

[Htownnofrown]

I too work in the professional community and was worried about gossip getting out, but I have found that the anonymity in the rooms has been very well kept. I tried everything else but AA/NA are what worked for me. Almost 2 years clean, I am proof that it works if you work it!

[throwindatowl]

What is said at those meetings is suppost to stay there. In a perfect world people could keep there mouths shut. Na has helped me so much I think you need to find a way. If you gotta drive to another town. If you keep up your addiction people will really be talking sooner or later. Private aftercare is another option. You gotta get after care somewhere. Even with aftercare there are no guarantees. It is your best chance for success. You gotta get help.

[hellc@mst]

Hi. Here is a link with a fairly comprehensive list of 12 step alternatives. They are ranked in order of effectiveness as believed by the Author.

http://www.behaviortherapy.com/whatworks.htm

Good Luck, Jeremy.

[WantToBeNormalAgain]

Have you ever considered/can you go to a therapist or drug counselor/substance abuse counselor or addictionologist? That way it's one on one and you can really get to the bottom line of why you were using. I know that NA meetings would be a great place for you to go and share and learn and such, but perhaps a more discreet place to start and at least get the process going would be a private therapist or counselor of sorts.

I'm not trying to nix the idea of NA/AA meetings, just give you another option. The above posters are right - it's the interaction that you'll find will help you with things, you'll hear other's stories and be able to share yours and gain insight and clarity. But an additional option would be to go see someone in private. I too, think this is where I faltered in the past and now know that this will be my last attempt as it will be a successful one. I'm doing all the things necessary for me to stay clean, which for me includes weekly one on one sessions with a therapist who has a vast knowledge in substance abuse. The SA is not the only focus of our sessions - it's getting to the very root of my cause for drug abuse and getting the tools to use when I need to process an array of different feelings and situations. It's done wonders for me already, and I'm so happy that I'm doing it..has one on one or even group therapy ever been an option for you?

Best of luck in whatever you decide is best for you. Try a few things on for size and you'll find the right recipe for success for yourself. Everyone is different in addiction and recovery, but I can tell that you're very ready to put it all behind you and that you'll do whatever it takes to get and stay sober - good for you!! You're ready, I'm ready, let's do this!! Best wishes!!

[tired_of_oxy]

"At this point , I am ready to try anything and everything to get myself well."
And that my dear is called "surrender" and is the very first step in recovering. See? Your already on your way ;) We come to realize that everything we tried in the past has led us back to using (our best thinking got us here after all!) and that we NEED outside help to accoimplish our goals. You'll do great and stepping into one of those rooms will be the greatest choice you've made in a long time.

[scoenen]

Thanks for the response.  I think this is what was missing from my last major attempt at getting clean.  At this point, I am ready to try anything and everything to get myself well.

[tired_of_oxy]

Whoever is at that meeting is there for the same reason you are - to get help. No they would not gossip or point at you in the street. It's just not like that. If it makes you feel better maybe you can find a meeting outside your town to go to but I really don't think you have anything to worry about. Go to a meeting and see for yourself, they are people just like you and me who have one common goal - to stay clean and help others do the same. You will be amazed at the support you will get. I just posted about this to you in your other thread. Not only will you get some much needed adult interaction but you'll get so much support and learn the tools to stay clean. I'm in the midst of detox and am hitting a meeting tonight because already the mindscrew is bothering me. I know by going to a meeting tonight I will shut my mind up long enough to listen to people who've been where I'm at and help me put things in perspective and leave there feeling a heck of a lot better then when I walked in. When we first get clean our minds are still very much not clean and your addict inside will try and rationalize and justify all kinds of crap. We need to change the way we think! That's where NA will help you so much. It will help you get to the roots of your addiction and learn the tools to do life clean and not use to solve problems. Give it a try, you may need to hit a few different meetings to find your "home" group and you'll know when you do. You have so much to gain from going. Another option is to get a therapist and preferably one that specializes in addiction. I plan on doing BOTH, I know I'm really screwed up in the way I think when it comes to the pills so I figure the more help the better lol. Give it a chance..