So, I had been down to 10 (12.8mg) codeine per day since Monday but yesterday was the worst! So achey and exhausted on the way hom, I put myself propmptly to bed once I got home but had not much in the way of sleep...by 4am(ish) I had to get up. I had 5 of my allowed daily dose, shortly followed by the other 5 as I felt so much in agony. Just before leaving for work an hour ago I had another 5 which is 5 more than I am supposed to be having each day on my self-made tapering schedule. AAAAGGGGHHH. I am such an idiot. I feel like I will never be able to stick to this! I was going to call a clinic today anyway about getting some external support which I will do, but I think if I mess up again like this, I will have to FORCE myself to take a week off work and do it CT instead. It seems to easy too go astray when tapering - too easy to have a few extra when they're right there. Right now I feel like I've just ruined all my progress and failed at it and i'm going to be like this forever blah...blah...blah...I also feel quite sick.
Not sure I can get through three-four more weeks of these horrendous moods and ailments as I take less and less of these dastardly pills I somehow ended up abusing for years of my life! Weeks more of being an absolute *&%^^ to my partner who will think I'm having an anxiety/depression flare up for no apparent reason.
The fact is, it will be so hard to get a week off work to just come completely off them so I am really relying on being able to stick to this schedule I've made for myself. I need it to work.
Right now, I just want to believe so much that I am still on the right track and will be able to end this once and for all.
Hey gin...I'm currently detoxing from long term Percocet addiction...I'm about 48 hours into it and also am really struggling with anxiety and the depression....I tried to taper a few times and it is really hard when u have a bunch of pills just sitting there :-/....I think the addict mind just says the heck with it and wants to just be satisfied in the moment....anyways stick with it....everyone is telling me after first 3-5 days it gets better...that's what I'm hoping anyways!!! So good luck to u :)
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