Methadone w/d help

[bushes420]

I've been coming to the forum for a cpl weeks trying to get ideas and help coming off of m'done.  I hate the drug with a passion & wish I'd have never agreed to take it.  I'm down to 2.5mg daily & scared outta my mind to drop from here.  I have the worst anxiety & never had that before.  Its been a long hard road so having anxiety now over m'done really bothers me.  My dr gave me a BP pill to try to help, but it makes me so tired i can't take it all the time.  I'm good while i'm at work, but coming home is extremely stressful.  My husband doesn't know any of this which makes it so much worse.  I feel like a total jack@$$ for not telling him the truth from the beginning, but i didn't so here we are.  I have norco to help the pain & seems to help coming down off the m'done (i'm trying 1 thing at a time & will do pain mgmnt to get off of norco b/c the hubby knows about that), but the mornings suck!  I've always taken them when I wake up with my coffee & it's the 1st thing I think about when I open my eyes.  
I've never taken a high dosage, at my peak i was taking 20mg daily, i'm down to 2.5mg daily (tappered down in 2 months time) & I really feel like a goon for even coming and asking for help.  I'm here & i know I need help from this horrific drug.  any suggestions would be GREATLY appreciated!!!!!

[gnarly_1]

Hi methadone can be hard to get off of  I took it down to 1 mg then jumped but your at a safe dose to jump from if I had to do it again it would be jump at 5mg and save the agony of tapering  below that amount if I where you i would jump now and get it over with the withdrawal can last a wile it is different for every body for me it took around 90 days to get back in the swing of things but I was on 150mg for almost 7 yrs your dose is small so your recovery should be a lot faster I agree with weaver about the N/A meetings they will help give you support when you need it like now keep posting for support here there are a lot of us that have been threw methadone detox good luck and God bless....Gnarly

[weaver71]

The anxiety truly makes it worse. You have minimal physical symptoms, so I think it will not be like Vicki and I went through. I remember being on 30mgs. I'd run low and taper to nothing in 4 or 5 days. I used to buy the 5mg tabs and save them for the taper. I felt sick for a week, then a week of feeling real low energy. It was not that bad, though I didn't know that, I had not built up a 200mg tolerance yet. Your doctor sounds great, you are in the right mind set, and have tapered down in a good way. Try to relax, it will be so worth it. Try meditation, just sit and empty your mind for 10-20 min a few times a day. Try to accept and surrender to this process. Your guilt and anxiety are not helping, that is why we always encourage folks to tell their secret. Imagine being the person you always intended to be. Ask your doctor about a good addiction counselor he trust to keep your life anonymous. Go to church. Do anything that inspires you to be the best person you can be. It may sound corny or unnecessary, but those things really help people stay focused on recovery rather than detox. You will get through this and never regret it, none of it. You will wake up with the peace of knowing you are doing your best. I sense some hope building up in you. Take the plow and never look back. You are taking back control of your life. What could be more important than that? Keep your eyes on the prize.

[bushes420]

Thanks folks, I really appreciate the support. I have no ties to cut other than my Dr anymore. I am only getting my meds from my Dr. I was on a higher dose, felt nothing as I decreased my mg. down from 10 has been hard but I think I am mentally making it worse than it really is. I haven't experienced any physical symptoms other than my stool changes (being on opiates for so long I'm kind of used to it) & appetite. Some days I don't feel like eating & others I can't get enough.
My dr is very helpful, I have spoken with him daily since this all started so I'm hopeful if I need something for anxiety he'll give it to me.

I'm hopeful I won't experience too bad of w/d bc of low dosage, but fear for the worst-which I think is part of the anxiety of w/d.

[ariley13]

I have no experience with methadone, but I did detox off a rather large dose of norco. I also suffer from some serious pain issues. I just wanted to add my support. You can do this. You are in the perfect spot here. We all have either been or are where you're at now. This site is amazing and full of supportive, knowledgeable people. Get a solid plan in place. Cut your ties to any access for drugs of any kind. Set up your support system. Then go! We can help you out with suggestions for things that ease withdrawl symptoms. This will be tough, but you can do it!!

[VICourageous]

Hi, Just take a deep breath, you will be fine. The reason why it is so so so important to let your Hub know is because he will be your biggest supporter. My Hub sat down and read and watched all the videos about the disease of addiction and the pleasure pathway. When there was time I just could not take things he was there to remind me of what could happen if I use any Substances at all. I would get so frustrated on the way I felt and he would be the one to remind me it will take TIME.
You are on a very low dose. There are some of us that where on a really high dose. I got my self down to at least 60mg and then cut it right to 30mg and jumped off. I did get off of 2 other meds besides the dones. Each med pulled me this way and that way. It did take a long time for me but I am no young chic either. I do know YOU will bounce back very quickly at such a low dose and you are most likely younger. There is not a soul out here that does/did not fear the w/ds. Yes it is scary but in time it is so worth it.
I was to stubborn to take any meds at all to help my w/ds..BUT I finally did take the Clonidine (bp) for about 2-3 weeks. Try only taking it at night only. I could not take it during the day at all. It does work great at night.
They also have a non-additive anxiety med that is called Buspar. They use both these meds alot for detoxing.
Now when you get completely off come back and we will help you with the natural things we use to help build our brain & body back up from what the drugs take out..OK Keep Hydrated, lots and lots of water to flush it out and also some Protein drinks and Electrolyte drinks.Stick around you can do it but be Patient as it does take time to feel good or better.
Bless

[bushes420]

The things he said to her were certainly to make her open her eyes & come back to reality. I don't want to lie, I've lied my whole life & just want it to be over. I want a new beginning & a fresh new me-if my family is with me that's fantastic, if not well, ill deal & move on.  Sundays seem to be my day because he is gone all day, I took .2 mg of clonidine as prescribed to keep my BP from sky rocketing & nothing else. I have approx 15-20 days of dones left -- would LOVE to just flush em, I've tried myself but think maybe ill ask him to do it w/ me. Maybe that'll help me do it completely. I can't take time off work right now & my DR recommends I not cut the Norco out until after my surgery due to the high pain level. The Norco isn't my crutch I go days without taking them, but I also know that switching from one to another isn't an option either. There are days I cannot get out of bed due to my pain level, mornings are by far my worst-it seems if I can get through the mornings I'm golden

[weaver71]

That was the mindset that saved me, "with or without him I NEED to be clean." My wife said lots of mean things, I realize now, she was just being straight forward and honest. If I had to hide my addiction to stay with my family, I would have lost everything. Did your husband say mean things and then help her or run her off? My fear is, even if you detox without telling the truth, the back door will still be open. AA says, 'we are only as sick as our secrets." I remember you talking about your family before, my town was built by Italian settlers and many families are still here. I get what you are talking about, I also know what coming off methadone is like. You can keep lying and say you have a flu or something, but I fear they will see through that. I wish I knew an easier, softer way. When do you plan to jump ?

[bushes420]

Oh the lying is killing us...I know he knows more than he'll tell me, I can see it in his eyes.  I do feel like I'll be alone if I tell him & I am too frightened to go through this alone .  Just the thought of it makes me cry & have anxiety.  He & his family own several businesses in our small town of 1000 - I hate that I'm hurting them with my lies & they are the real reason I know I can do this.  My family is that crazy italian family that hides everything b/c they want everyone to believe their perfect - talking to them is out of the question.  My step daughter had a problem recently & Jason said so many mean & hurtful things to her that I fear for the same.  I have accepted that we may not make it through this,but with or without him I NEED to be clean.  The constant fog and feeling that I have is miserable.  I have to ask, WTH is up with the weightgain on this ****?  I always thought Opiates caused weightloss...

[weaver71]

I agree with Heather. I struggled to get off Mdone and I know the anxiety of a secret like this. Turns out, the lying hurt my wife more than anything else. Chances are, he knows. It will be a huge relief to get this skeleton out of the closet. You never went above 20 mgs, and you are tapering, it should not be as bad as many of the stories. After you tell him, ditch the Mdone and the Hydros will help a lot. I know how scary it is. I really thought I would end up alone if I was honest, but honesty, willingness, and openmindedness are what saved me. I am 13 months off Mdone and life is pretty good, this week has been awesome. I was taking a lot more, I was sick for months, it was all worth it. My marriage is getting better and better now. My friends tell me I finally look healthy. I live in a town of 3500, and had the same fear as you. Surprisingly, when I started talking about it, every single person had been through it or had a family member who has. Doctors, nurses, business owners, athletes, mostly professionals can afford pills. I was shocked and felt so dumb for not reaching out for help sooner. Have you gone to counseling or NA? It may help anxiety as well. You will be free, but I really suggest losing the tough girl approach and get as much help as you can. I was so tough I took them until they drove my life into misery and constant struggle. Congrats on your progress and getting serious about this. Time heals all things.

[Heather8448]

It wasnt easy I wont lie...but today is 24days and I am still here...check ur msg
What dont kill us makes us stronger
At this point imo be honest dont hide things
and @2.5 your just prolonging it and the anxiety will be worse I had 8 left i carried with me as a security blanket NOT A GOOD IDEA I flushed them...

[bushes420]

well that just scared the hell outta me LOL.  I've been hoping that cutting myself down to 2.5mg would help with the w/d, but reading all these posts just me frightened.  like I said my husband knows nothing of this, which scares me the most.  I know he would be supportive of me, but I've always been able to get through stuff on my own.  The way he found out I even took them was so wrong & tbh I've always been embarrassed that I took them.  I've had some pretty rough experiences in my life, but never truly regretted something until now & that's taking the methadone.  Dropping from 5mg to 2.5 was rough, I dropped 6lbs in 4 days (which isn't bad b/c I've gained a lot of weight in the 10 years i've taken these stupid things) and do fear for the worst that I know is yet to come.  I'm hopeful that b/c I'm not stopped all narcotics at once it'll be easier for me to handle, but I don't know...I take 10mg Norco 3-4 times a day & my dr told me to take up to 6 to help me get off the methadone if I choose & we'll deal with it later b/c he knows the situation & i've begged him not to refill by script.  I have about 15 days of them left they are 10mg tabs so I can't go much less than the approx 2.5 i'm taking now by breaking them in half.  I'm thinking of trying to cut them up even smaller & go from there...

My hubby & I are having problems right now as well - all b/c of the m'done.  My anxiety is so bad I have to say that thus far that's the worst.  He says we are doing better & I feel like I'm on the verge of losing everything.  Part of me just wants to confide in him & tell him everything, but a week ago when **** hit the fan I said I haven't taken them in a month, just had them on me in case the vacation got too much for me & I really needed them (we traveled across the country on a motorcycle).  We live in a very small town so I fear ppl with find out.  

I've been reading horror stories...
So anyway... are you still clean?  How has it been, truthfully?

[Heather8448]

A lot of it is mental at first..The physical comes later but if you can pust through it it will be worth it..
People will come by  to give you advice...
Drink a lot of water keep as active as possible. Take vitamins
Here is my post from when I started I was a freaked as you
http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Addiction-Substance-Abuse/What-do-I-have-to-look-forward-to-during-detox/show/1967848#post_9236517

You can read advice there

This site saved my life!!! Good luck