Monica Fernandez

[ImagineMama]

I'm a 34 year-old mom of two and have been on methadone for about 15 years for chronic back pain. I was at 30mg a day at my highest but tapered down to about 3mg for the last year or so. I took my last dose (my choice, I'm done being chained to these damn pills) 28 days ago and while my withdrawals haven't been insane like some I've read about, I definitely haven't been great. The low energy and restlessness is what's killing me. I could deal with the stomach cramps and diarrhea. I had some mild nausea. The first few weeks were rough as far as sleeping goes but Melatonin helped. I've been able to continue my 40-hour a week job but it's been a struggle since I have no motivation. I thought by now my energy levels would have improved. I've tried different vitamins and OTC stuff for restless legs but nothing has helped. I even tried higher doses of Imodium because I've heard that can help with withdrawal symptoms. It just made me nauseous and dehydrated. Does anyone have any advice? How long does this torture last? Even as I write this, my legs feel awful and I want to cut them off. I just feel so weak and worn out all the time.

[ImagineMama]

Thanks to everyone who responded. I'm on day 33 now and doing pretty well. I've found that my sleep patterns have completely changed. I've been a night owl my entire life- often not going to sleep until about midnight and loved sleeping in every chance I got. Now I wake up at around 6 am (today was 5), even on the weekends, and I'm UP. I used to hit the snooze button as often as possible but now I wake up before my alarm even goes off and I'm ready for bed around 8:30 - 9pm. Such a drastic change! I don't necessarily mind waking up early but I kind of miss being alert and energetic at night since that's when my "me" time was. Cest la vie!

As far as the physical side of things goes, I'm hanging in there. Everything aside from the restless legs and lack of motivation has completely gone away. I was blessed in that I never really had any bad anxiety or depression (and actually I just weaned off my anti-depressants about two months before I jumped off the methadone, so I was really concerned that I'd go spiraling). It does get me down from time to time that I feel crappy still because it seems to go on and on and on, but I know I'm recovering day by day and I have the strength and fortitude to keep hanging in there.

I do walk at least twice a day during my breaks and that does help. The sun feels good. Eating feels good.

I wish I could turn back the clock and tell my doctor HELL NO when he offered methadone all those years ago. Withdrawal from this stuff is probably one of the hardest things I've ever done, and I've been through some seriously challenging stuff. A month of feeling like your soul has been sapped from your body is more than anyone should have to endure. However, as with any difficult feat I've gone through, I feel stronger and more empowered knowing that this too is survivable and conquerable. Did I mention that I've had methadone completely accessible in my house this entire time? My husband takes it for chronic pain as well. The fact that I've been able to resist taking that easy out - one little pill and all this pain goes away - makes me feel like a true warrior!

I would love to hear from others on your experiences with methadone! Thanks to all for your support and encouragement.

[Davidmel]

My sleep has been the exact same as yours. Im 2 days shy of 5 weeks no methadone. I have some really really low days... sometimes i work, come home and sleep, wake up to eat and go to bed at 830. I havent been takimg my welbutrin regularly... mainly because ive gained 15 lbs since being off opiates. Kratom has helped some, but hasnt done for me what it has for others. I still cannot muster the energy to walk... still feeling sorry for myself.. good luck to us... im so mad at myself for getting myself in this state!

[SarahOz]

Congratulations on breaking free from methadone!
If the restless legs are still giving you grief, seeing your dr to see if clonidine (an old BP medication now used to treat restless leg syndrome due to opiod withdrawal) may be of benefit. Keep in touch.

[motye51]

Not kidding.............go sit in the sun for a little while.  There's something in the sun that picks up your mood and energy level.  Music helped me tremendously as well....even if I wasn't in a good mood, my foot will automatically tap when music comes on.  Eating VERY, VERY healthy!  Very healthy will increase your energy level as well as exercise.  I see you work 40 hrs a week so even if it's just a quick walk around the block....ANYTHING....to get your blood flowing.  It will come back but is going to take a little more time.  You can shorten that time though, doing the things above.  Good luck to you on your journey!

[Soulscapex]

Congrats , on your 28 days, best advice i can give you is exercise, take brief walks everyday, then start going a little farther. Your energy will come back, it wasnt till around my 2 month mark that i started to feel the change, make sure your drinking lots of water and eating healthy, lots of protein,  a clean diet will make tons of changes. Your body is adjusting , it has to start making its own endorphines. The only true fix is time. Take a some hot baths, get out in the sun. Just remember the symptoms will end.

God Speed